New Soul
by leeleerose
Summary: A New Soul is different. It grows stronger with each day, blocks out the pain and embraces new love. Jake and Bella realise their love is worth fighting for. This is how the books should have gone, had Bella chosen Jake. Strong B/J. Sequel WILL follow :D
1. New Soul

_Thankyou for beginning this journey with me. This story follows Jake and Bella as they discover their true feelings for one another and attempt to overcome the many obstacles in their lives. After all, love is something worth fighting for _

_Love and best wishes,_

_Lee-leerose xx_

_**Chapter 1: New Soul**_

_The wind blew ferociously, swaying the trees dangerously. I stood in the cold, dark forest, watching, waiting for any sort of clue that would explain why I was there. Echoes of a familiar voice flowed on the wind, through the moving trees. A melodic voice whispered my name "Bella, Bella, Bella". My body shivered as the leaves rustled around me. The voice came again, closer now. I spun on the forest floor, trying to find the direction the mysterious voice was coming from. It was so familiar, yet I my mind couldn't quite link the name. Louder still the voice said "Bella". _

_The trees in front of me opened to the darkness. A stone white hand emerged, bright light in the shadow. It reached out, beckoning me towards it. My body wanted so much to move closer, but my mind screamed in protest. Instinctively, I tried to step back from the cold but an invisible force drew me towards it. I was frightened; my heart beat faster as adrenaline took over. I found that I was no longer in control of my body. A voice in my head screamed at me to run but as hard as I tried I could not find the will to do as it said. The voice's screams were agonizingly persistent as my body rejected its warnings. _

_I struggled as the stone hand became close enough to touch me. It gripped the front of my shirt. Ice cold fingers clamping shut, trapping me in its grasp. Suddenly the rest of the body emerged in one smooth movement. An angel stood before me. He was tall and lean, lithe muscle covering his arms and torso. His face was an image of perfection, symmetrical and beautiful. His bronze hair was slightly tousled from the still whistling wind. I felt a jerk in my chest and looking down I could see that his hand had sunk through my shirt and into my skin. Wrist deep it began swivelling back and forth, searching blindly. Suddenly it stopped and I looked up to see a glint of dark pleasure in the angel's eyes. The angel tugged sharply on whatever it had found inside me. I doubled over with excruciating pain. The pain was radiating throughout my whole body. I looked down in time to see that the angel's hand had managed to pull itself from my chest, no longer stone white but blood red. Strong fingers encased a small white box. Pocketing the object, the angel smiled darkly before walking back into the shadows, still in possession of my soul. I screamed. Stumbling forwards in blind pain I collapsed and fell to the forest floor. There I lay, until the warmth awoke me._

"Shhhhh, Bells. You'll wake Charlie." A warm and familiar voice pulled me back to the present. "It was just a bad dream. You're alright now, I'm here" My heart was thumping in my head, screaming in protest. My breath was coming quickly with panic. As my stuttering heart slowed I realised the unbearable pain was gone. I clutched at my chest and was surprised to find that there was no hole, no blood, no injuries to suggest that any of it had been real.

Fear was replaced by shock. The dark forest was replaced by my familiar room, and the looming angel had disappeared for good. Instead of cold stone I could feel warmth radiating from somewhere nearby. Slowly it dawned on me that someone else was in my room. They had spoken to me; their breathing was slow and even.

"Jake" I gasped his name, fighting back the tears that I knew were coming. I reached out, searching for him. "Jake" I pleaded, my voice wavering slightly. Finally I found him, my hands coming into contact with his smooth, warm chest. I wrapped my arms around his waist, rashly pulling him towards me. He responded by moving closer, and carefully circling his arms around me. I moved my hands to his shoulders so I could hold onto him more tightly. Then I blinked and allowed the tears to come.

_There's a small insight to the story. Please review and tell me what you thought. There are many more chapters to come _


	2. Lost Without You

_Thankyou for all your support. This story is going ahead as planned _

_Lee-leerose xx_

**Chapter 2: Lost Without You**

Jake held me for a long moment, rubbing small circles on my back and whispering reassuring words in my ear. It was embarrassing to think that this boy, who had told me only yesterday that he didn't want me around anymore, that he couldn't be friends with me, was, yet again, saving me from myself. He deserved better than this. No matter how much I needed him I had to let him go. When the tears had finally subsided I decided that it was time to face my saviour, no matter what it would bring.

"I'm sorry Jake. You shouldn't have to see me like this. I'm falling apart, a broken glass that's seeping through the cracks." I couldn't stand to look into his eyes, so I bowed my head like the coward I was. Jake pulled me closer. I took the opportunity to bury my face into his chest, hiding my tears.

"No Bells, it's my fault. I promised you I would look after you, that I would never hurt you and I broke that promise. I'm so sorry, for everything."

Wait, he was blaming himself for my selfish actions!

No, he wasn't going to take the blame for this. I could not let him do that. This wasn't his fault. I should have never let him feel as though he had to take care of me. He had to understand that I wasn't his problem.

"No, Jake. I know how much I've hurt you. You wanted something that I couldn't give before. You have saved me from myself, Jacob, more times than you know. You wanted to know why I couldn't love you?"

I could feel Jake's head nod above mine.

"It was never you Jake. It was always me. My mind, it's a dangerous place for me to go. I try to forget, to let go, but it just won't let me. Each memory is painful, both physically and mentally. You've seen the way I crawl into myself? The way I hold myself when the memories come back?"

I winced at the thought, but Jake just lifted my chin with his finger so that I could see his face. He nodded for me to proceed, his warm eyes calming me. "Well, that's what happens when the memories take over. They control me Jake. For a long time I thought that they had consumed me. I thought they had taken my soul. But then I found you. In the darkest hour, when all of the light had faded away, you were my sun, my tiny ray of hope. After all you've done I don't want you to think that I'm your responsibility. You deserve better Jake. You deserve someone whole who will treat you the way you should be treated. Someone who can look after you just as well as you can her." I gained enough courage to look directly into his dark eyes, glinting in the faint moonlight. It was then that I decided. He needed to know. "Jake, I want you to go and build a great life. Get married, have a family and forget about me. Please?" He was speechless. He did not move at all except to blink. I realised that all the time I had been talking he had stopped breathing.

"Breathe Jake" I reminded him, softly.

He let out a ragged breath then finally said "Bella, have a never made myself clear about how much you mean to me?" My heart caught in my chest.

"Jake, I know how you feel, but I'm not good for you" He huffed a breath of amusement at the use of his own words.

"But Bells, I'm willing to help you. I'm willing to fix you up. I WANT to help you. I want to be a part of your life, to be the one you depend on. I want to be there for you, always. That girl, the one who treats me right and looks after me just as much as I do her, that girl is you, Bella. You have made my life so much more worthwhile by just being around." His words overwhelmed me. Stupidly, I began to cry, the tears falling down my cheeks. "Bella? Honey, what's the matter?" I sniffed, holding back the rest if the tears.

"It's just that today you told me to leave. You told me we couldn't be friends anymore. You hate me Jacob, and with good reason. Why love someone who, until today, didn't realise that they loved you too? I'm not your responsibility Jacob. You can leave me. You should leave me. I owe you that." It took all the self-control I had to push him away. Jake didn't move. He seemed frozen, his eyes staring into the space above my head. His arms slipped loose from their position on my waist. I rolled myself over so that I faced away from him.

There was a moment of silence before I felt him move carefully across the bed. He repositioned himself so that every part of his body was warming mine. He placed his chin on my exposed shoulder while his arms managed to circle once again around my waist, pulling me back against his hot chest. His warm breath trailed across my neck as he spoke. "You love me, Bella?"

I nodded slowly, allowing the idea to settle in. I loved Jacob Black. I could not live without him. Yet somehow I had to let him go, for his own good. Suddenly my train of thought was interrupted.

I had been turned over so that I was facing Jacob. His face was inches from mine, warm breath flowing across my lips. His body was still pressed against mine, his muscular arms trapping me where I lay. But I didn't mind, really. This might be the last time I would ever see him. He asked again "You love me, with all your heart?"

"Yes" I replied truthfully. The next thing I knew his mouth was on mine, and I was responding with all my heart.

Kissing Jacob was nothing like I had ever experienced before. His lips were soft and urgent against mine as they moved from my lips to my neck and back again, making a circuit I would never forget. Eventually we came to a point where I reflexively pulled back, as I would have done with Edward. However, Jacob was having none of that. He moved his hands to run through my hair, causing me to shiver with pleasure. I could feel a smile form on Jake's lips and he continued to kiss me lovingly. I copied him and moved my hands to his hair. I began playing with the soft stands while using this position to hold him closer to me. It was my turn to smile as I felt him react in much the same way that I had. My mouth moved against his as my hands memorised his face, his chest, his arms until we finally broke apart, both gasping for air. He smiled up at me. Somehow I had managed to position myself on top of him, although I didn't remember it. I was dazed and lost in my own bliss.

Jake broke the silence. "When I told you to leave me today it wasn't because of you, it was because of me." I snorted with disgust at the lie. "Seriously Bella, you being no good for me? It's the other way around. I've put you in danger just by coming to see you tonight. The others warned me not to come but I had to see you. I was such a jerk today. Please forgive me?" I silenced him with another kiss and we ended the night that way as I became lost in my personal sun. Oh, how lost I would be without him.

_Reviews are love __ xx_


	3. Begin Again

_Sorry guys, I've been away for a few weeks and wasn't able to upload any new chapters. Thanks for the great support. I hope you like what there is to come. I know this chapter is a little dull, but I'm planning a story line I think you'll enjoy. Keep the reviews coming; they make me want to keep writing _

_love and best wishes, _

_leeleerose xx_

_**I do not own anything. Jake and Bella belong to Stephanie Meyer. I'm only changing the story to suit my Jacob side. Also the names of each chapter are the names of songs I was listening to as I wrote each part of the story. Enjoy!**_

**Chapter 3: Begin Again**

I awoke to Jakes quiet snores, his breath washing softly across my face. Sunlight was seeping through the folds of my curtain, the tiny slit of bright white splayed across my bedspread, growing in size, until it finally reached my hand intertwined with Jakes on his bare chest.

Hang on a minute. Bare? Why was Jake not wearing a shirt? I looked down and let out a sigh of relief when I saw that I still had my tank-top on. It was boiling hot lying in Jakes arms. The tank top I was wearing could have been a fleece-lined jacket. However, as much I wanted to cool down, I knew that, for the time being, I did not want to go any further than we had last night. Just being with Jake and feeling whole again was enough for me. I wasn't sure if I could handle progressing any quicker in our relationship.

I carefully extracted myself from Jake's arms and the blankets. When I moved from his side, Jake rolled over slightly so that he lay in the spot I had been moments before. The hand that had held mine now lay open, invitingly. He was so beautiful. His russet coloured skin and black-short cropped-hair was perfect in every way.

It took some effort to finally look away from the sleeping Jacob. The case of Jake's missing shirt was still hot on my mind as I looked around, expecting to find it in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor. But there was no shirt to be seen. I made a mental note to ask him when he woke up. What could he have been thinking, to come into my house, with my father here, without a shirt on? Actually, come to think of it, how did he get in the house in the first place? Charlie would have heard him come through the front door. I looked around again. Wow, Jacob really was keeping me guessing. My eyes rested on the only other possibility. But no, surely not. How could he have gotten up through my open window? Curious.

I grabbed my jeans and a shirt before going to the bathroom to change. It was lucky that Charlie had gone fishing this morning. If he had walked in to find a shirtless Jacob, not only in his teenage daughter's room, but in her bed...well, let's just say the rifle would have been off the hanger in a second.

I took care not to make any noise as I went downstairs to make breakfast. Deciding that I felt like a cooked breakfast I began by taking out the eggs and bacon. I had no doubt that Jacob would be hungry, so I lay out double the amount that I would have if it was just Charlie and I.

The eggs and bacon were sizzling and crackling away in the saucepan when Jake entered the kitchen. I did not notice that he had come down the stairs at first. That was, until he yawned loudly, sounding somewhat like a puppy dog that had been woken from a good sleep.

"Morning sleepy" I greeted him with a smile. He blinked twice before looking at me with tired, yet happy eyes. "Good morning Bells" He grinned.

"Is something cooking? It smells good." He licked his lips hungrily. I laughed.

"Bacon and Eggs, you hungry?"

"Starving" he answered, still grinning. He was staring at me with a slightly confused look, as though he was thinking about something. "What?" I asked, suddenly feeling self-conscious. "Did I get egg on me or something?" I looked down, checking myself. I heard a low snigger before I felt Jakes arms wind comfortably around my waist. I leaned back and looked up into his big dark eyes. "What? What's the matter?" I asked again, feeling even more concerned this time. "Nothing's wrong Bella. Everything's fine."

"Oh..." I sighed in relief "Well that's good, I wasn't sure for a second there." I turned in Jake's embrace so that I could wrap my arms securely around his torso. I snuggled my face into his chest.

"Actually, no"

"What?" I asked, completely distracted at that moment in time.

"Everything is not fine"

I looked up, feeling worried, only to find Jake looking down at me, still grinning. Now I was thoroughly confused. "What is it Jake?" I asked, yet again.

"Everything is _perfect_" He emphasised the last word. I looked up at him, too surprised to speak. Jake quickly lent down and planted a small kiss on my forehead. I felt a smile grow on my face. That was when I remembered.

"BREAKFAST"

_Oh ow, burnt breakfast is being dished up in the next serving of this story _

_xx_


	4. Will You Catch Me When I Fall?

_Okay, so this is the second chapter uploaded for this week. It seems I have been in the writing mood after missing 3 weeks. If there are any suggestions for this chapter please review and let me know about any changes I can make to improve it. The ending may seem a little melodramatic (okay, well, very overdramatic) but I wanted to capture how Bella feels when she thinks about Edward and what he did to her when he left. Hopefully I've managed to get that through, but any help would be greatly appreciated._

_Happy reading, leeleerose xx_

**Again I do not own the characters. They are Steph Meyer's creation. I only make up the story line **

CATCH ME WHEN I FALL

We ate overly crispy bacon and hard yolked eggs for breakfast that morning. Jake didn't mind at all, although I suspected that he would have eaten even Charlie's cooking when he was hungry.

Halfway through our meal I decided to ask him about last night.

"Jake?"

"Yea?"

"Before I start, I just want you to know that I woke up this morning as the happiest girl alive..."

"As did I, but since you have already taken the role of the happiest girl, I will just have to settle for the happiest guy" Jake smiled sweetly. I smiled back before continuing.

"Well, I noticed a couple of things that I was extremely curious about, but I just couldn't figure them out"

"And these things concern me, right?" Jake's eyes locked with mine.

"Yes" I answered truthfully. There was an awkward pause. I wasn't sure how to proceed. Would he think it rude of me to ask these questions? After all, he had saved me last night, yet again. Maybe it didn't matter. But soon enough I found that Jake had solved this dilemma for me.

"Just ask me Bella. Whatever it is you want to know, I will answer as truthfully as I can."

Wow. How well this boy knew me.

"Okay..."

I looked down at the over-cooked egg still sitting on my plate, slightly embarrassed by what I was about to say.

"Well, the first was that you were not wearing a shirt"

"Okay"

"Huh?" I looked up. Surely that was not all he was going to say.

"Okay"

"Is that all your answer is? Okay?"

"Well, what do you want to know about me not wearing a shirt? I can make a mental note to bring one along if you wish. I mean, if it makes you feel uncomfortable..." He trailed off. My head snapped up.

"No, No." I was surprised at how quickly I replied to this offer. I could see the corners of Jake's mouth pull up in a small smile. "It's not that I feel uncomfortable or anything. It doesn't bother me, really. But I was just wondering why that was. You do realise that Charlie could have come in at any point during the night? And if he had found you, shirtless, in my bed...like we were..." I felt my cheeks flush red and dropped my head yet again. "It would not have gone down well at all" I mumbled quickly to finish.

I heard the gentle scraping of Jake's chair. A few moments later he knelt down next to me. His hand reached out and with one finger under my chin he gently raised my face so it was level with his.

His hand rested on the side of my face, his thumb drew idle lines across my cheekbone. After a few moments, he said quietly "My dear Bella, do you realise how much I've missed you? Your smile" He touched the corner of my mouth with his thumb "Your eyes" His gaze became fixed with mine. I could feel myself reddening again, yet I couldn't find the will to look away. "And your blush" He smiled as I turned even redder as he ran his thumb smoothly across my cheek. "You are so beautiful, Bella, so very beautiful. I love you. I have always loved you" My heart stuttered slightly. I was blown away by those few simple words. Jacob loved me. After confessing that I too loved him last night this was the only thing I wanted to hear. Slowly but surely my heart began to beat rhythmically again. Jacob continued "Your dad already knows how I feel about you"

"Really?" I asked, perplexed, my heart still floating like a feather "Charlie knows?"

"Yes, that's why I wasn't worried about him walking in to find me in bed with you, shirtless."

"So, you just weren't wearing one to begin with?"

"No, I wasn't. In case you haven't noticed I have a relatively high body temperature. Therefore I rarely need clothes for warmth"

"Yeah, I've noticed" I smiled slyly and placed my hand upon his chest, just above his heart. I could feel it beating evenly, slow and calming. "So is that how you got inside as well? Did Charlie let you in?"

Now it was Jakes turn to blush

"Actually, no"

I looked at him with curiosity. "But then, how...?"

"Now, Bella, don't be mad, but after our little...disagreement...the other day, I felt horrible. I had to come and see if you were okay. The others didn't want me to come. They said it was too dangerous"

My stomach dropped. _Too dangerous. _The words echoed in my head. _But this means that they know about Laurent._ But of course, if Sam's group really was a cult for vampire haters, and they had discovered the well-hidden secret of the Cull....the vampire family, then surely they would know about the presence of Laurent. _And Victoria_ I reminded myself.

And of course they would think it dangerous, with two vampires lurking around Forks anywhere was dangerous. _Especially anywhere near me_ I thought. I shivered inwardly. Luckily Jacob didn't seem to notice. He continued as if nothing had happened.

"But I needed to come and see you, so I ran away and snuck in through your window. When I saw you lying there, in so much pain, I knew I couldn't leave. They will have probably figured out where I am by now. I was supposed to have been home again before anyone could notice that I had left, but obviously things turned out differently than I had initially planned."

"I'm sorry if I got you into trouble. I didn't mean to" I whispered

Jacob smirked "Hey Bells, I'm not complaining. I'm glad we worked everything out last night."

"So am I. But about what you said before, Charlie knew that you loved me that whole time?"

"Yes Bella, he knew. He and everyone else knew for a long time. Everyone, except you."

"No, Jake. That's not quite true. I did know. Well, kind of."

I watched as Jake's brow furrowed in confusion.

"What do you mean Bella?"

"I knew. I knew since that day we walked along the beach at La Push. But Jake, you need to know that I couldn't face my feelings. Not then." Jake nodded silently, showing that he remembered. He sat quietly, waiting for more. I wouldn't be able to do it. I couldn't explain why, but I knew I had to try. Jacob was here, to catch me if I should fall. I took a deep breath before continuing.

"I knew how you felt, but I could never face the truth. I couldn't feel for you because I was blinded by emotions too strong to see past. For a long time I was absorbed in...him. He was everything Jake, you have to understand that. But when he left I was so empty. He left a hole. It hurt Jake, more than you know. And even now, talking about him pulls at the edges of the gap. When I push myself too far it reopens, and the pain takes over, just like last night." I saw Jake shudder as he remembered. "It's at times like these that I need you Jake. Right now I'm treading in dangerous waters. Will you catch me when I fall?"

"Of course Bells, I'd do anything for you. I just want you to be okay. But if you don't want to talk about it I can wait until you're ready" He was looking worried, scared for my sanity, no doubt. I shook my head slowly.

"I don't think I _will _ever _be_ ready. I have to try to overcome my own pain Jake, but I can't do it alone" A tear escaped from the corner of my eye. Jake caught it and wiped it away with the hand that was still cupped around the side of my face. "Thank you" He nodded, his eyes filled with sadness.

"When I met you, you mended me Jake. You put me back together. You saved me enough for me to be able to feel for you as I do now. I love you Jake, and never again will I feel the pain that I received from Ed...." Suddenly the hole reopened. I felt the edges tear apart as I pushed myself too far. My stomach curled in upon itself. I fell forwards, my self-control lapsing. Warm arms broke my fall. I tried again."...Edwa..." The pain was spreading through my chest. I whimpered as it seared my heart. The warm arms wrapped tightly around me, keeping me sane. I had to try again, for Jacob. "...Edward..." I gasped. A cold hand penetrated my skin, plunging in and stealing my soul. A flash of a memory, a nightmare. Then everything went black.


	5. Somethin' Special

SOMETHIN' SPECIAL

Everything was cold. This place was familiar and dark. I had been here so many times before, yet somehow this time felt different. Instead of the usual feelings of dread and sorrow, I now felt light, almost free. That was when I knew that he was finally gone.

I couldn't see through the darkness that clouded my eyes. My mind wandered as it tried to find an exit, an escape back to reality, but instead it found a faint noise echoing through the still air. I strained to listen as the familiar voice, warm and urgent, became stronger. Finally I was able to hear my name being called. "Bella". I was surprised to find that it sounded nothing like the cold voice that normally called from the shadows. Instead this voice was filled with love and worry. I longed to see that childish grin and those deep, warm eyes. I wanted my Jake. I tried to awaken but couldn't, so I focused on regaining control over my senses.

I thought about the previous night and how it had felt to be held by Jake. His protective embrace that I would always need and would always want. Finally I could feel a pair of strong, warm arms folded securely around my back. Heat radiated from his chest as it pressed against mine. His mouth tickled slightly at my ear as he spoke my name. It was such a simple gesture, yet it meant so much. After being lost in the dark it was nice to know that I was still myself. I was still Bella Swan, and Jacob still loved me.

I was almost out. Life was coming fast.

Next I focused on how much I wanted to see him. His eyes, so deep and kind were the windows to his soul. They expressed so much and guarded so little. I could almost imagine the dark, puppy dog eyes staring into mine. Before long my eyes opened, and I awoke to my sun.

He stared down at me, his eyes exactly as I had imagined them to be. His arms were holding me tight against him. With my shoulders level with his my feet barely scraped the floor. They dangled weakly in mid-air as Jake lifted me, supporting all my weight. "Bella?" Jake's voice was rough and husky with emotion. In answer I leant my face into the crook of his neck, turning my head to press my lips against the soft skin there. "Thank you, Jake" A small moan escaped from Jake's lips. There was a hint of pain in his voice when he spoke next. His voice was barely a whisper as his lips moving against my ear "Bella, why did you do that? You didn't have to do that. You have nothing to prove to me"

"No, I know, not to you. But I have to prove to myself that I am strong enough to move on. Jake, I don't want to have him there when I'm with you. I want to be able to give myself to you completely, and now I can. I've let go. He's gone" I could feel the happy growl in Jake's throat. It reverberated through his chest, shaking me slightly. I giggled. His lips moved from my ear to my neck. They pressed softly at the base of my earlobe and moved down to my collarbone, placing soft kisses on my skin, before pausing. Jake stopped and looked up at me, still held securely in his arms. "Bells, I have a feeling we've missed a crucial step in our relationship"

What had we missed? I was sure that there was no rule book to these things. Unless if he meant...._that_. No, I wasn't ready for _that_. I wasn't ready to move on, not just yet. Surely he didn't want to go that fast. Jake seemed to notice my anxiousness because he released me from his bear like hug, allowing me to slide to the floor. Being my clumsy self however, my legs couldn't hold my own weight. They turned to jelly and I stumbled straight into Jake. He caught me, balancing me so I could stand by myself. "You alright Bells?" I nodded and looked up at him. Wow, he really had grown a lot in the last few months. "Bella," He said, bending down so that he was at my eye level "will you go out with me?" I could feel myself grinning from ear to ear. Jake grinned back. "Well?"

"Of course" I spoke in a rush of air before throwing myself into his arms and pressing my excited lips against his.


	6. Ready

_Thankyou to all my amazing reviewers, those who have subscribed to fave story alerts and fave author alerts, etc. You guys have been so good to me. It really does help when writing to know that there are people out there who want to know what happens next. Okay, so I didn't expect this chapter to be so long, but once I started I just couldn't stop. Unfortunately I was at mum's house this week which meant that even though I had finished this chapter I couldn't upload it. Lucky for you guys though, that means that I have finished the next chapter as well! I didn't want to upload too many at once otherwise the story might not sink in as well. I mean, you can't have your cake and eat it too :) But, if you ask very nicely and send me lots of reviews for this chapter I will upload the next chapter sooner rather than later :D I think that's fair. Don't you? Once I receive 10 new reviews I will upload. Let's see how many people really want to read the next chapter. I feel like I'm blackmailing you all.....hmmm. Let's see if you can wait for Jake and Bella's date ;) mwahahahahaaa_

_Until our next chapter together,_

_Happy reading (and reviewing!!),_

_leeleerose xx_

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything, only the story line. The wonderful Jake and Bella are from the fascinating imagination of Steph Meyer. And again, the name of the chapter is inspired by one of my favourite songs on my iPod play list :) I wonder if anyone else out there recognises/likes the same songs as I do....**

READY

It was Saturday night at last. I had begun to think that it would never come. It's funny how slowly time passes when you can't wait for something. Yet those months after _it _happened had gone so slowly. Each day had blended into the next. So much so that I never realised how long I had been in my Zombie-like trance. That was until I found Jake. _Hmmmm......maybe it's just waiting for Jake to come that makes time pass slowly,_ I thought _and when I'm with him the world just revolves faster, making time pass quicker_. What a good hypothesis :)

Tonight was my date with Jake. Even though we had seen each other every day after school this was going to be our first official date. I had to say that my truck had definitely been pushed to its limits in the past week. My poor truck could barely handle how fast I had wanted to get to La Push. By the time Friday came along Jake had had to drive his Rabbit down to my house because my truck just couldn't take the strain anymore. Jacob hadn't minded, but Charlie sure had given us some strange looks.

We had chosen not to tell Charlie about 'us' just yet. Jake was sure that he would be over the moon when he heard the news, but I wasn't so convinced. I didn't think that Charlie would be able to take it if mine and Jake's relationship didn't work out. Not so soon after _him. _I mean, it wasn't like I expected it to end badly or anything, but I knew how much Charlie had suffered when _he _left. I would never want to hurt Charlie like that, not again.

I stared into the bathroom mirror. It had taken me over two hours but I was finally ready. The girl staring back at me had wide, dark-brown eyes rimmed with thick eyelashes. The mascara had done its job (waterproof, of course, due to the high chances of rain in the town of Forks). Her eyes stood out from her pale face. Unfortunately no foundation could change this. As far as covering my skin tone went, bronzer made me look like an orang-utan and a darker foundation made me look like a bbq potato chip. Oh well, what's a Forks girl to do? It's not like there's ever enough sun to get a tan here. Even when I lived in Phoenix I was pale, so what chance did I have here?

Looking past the pasty complexion I focused on her hair. Gentle waves of dark brown framed her face. Tiny clips with precious dark blue stones held back a few strands, not too many but just enough to keep it from falling into her eyes. Now it wouldn't annoy me during the meal. The clips matched perfectly with the dark blue dress and shoes I had bought especially for the occasion. The dress was a halter neck and made with beautiful flowing material. It came in at the waist, showing off all my feminine curves thus far, before falling gently to just above the knees. I was surprised at myself that I had the nerve to wear heels. For the first time in my life I felt safe enough. I trusted Jake to take care of me, should I fall.

After completing the once over I returned to my room to retrieve my tiny silver bag. In it I put my purse, mobile, Camera and the pepper spray that Charlie had given me after I had used up my last bottle (on a vampire by the name of James, not that he knew that, of course) I smiled to myself. Charlie would be happy, as long as I took minor precautions. I grabbed my white cardigan before leaving and pulled the door shut behind me.

I could hear the television in the lounge room. Charlie would be in there watching the game. Although he knew I was going out tonight I don't think I had mentioned where to or with whom. He must have suspected that it was just one of the girls from school having a small get together. Hopefully he wouldn't ask too many questions. I took care walking down the stairs. I didn't want to fall and ruin the night, before it had even begun. It took me a long time, going down ever so slowly, step by step, but I eventually made it. By the time I reached the bottom the TV had turned to advertisements and Charlie had come into the kitchen to fix himself another drink. His eyes widened when he saw me "Bells?" He asked questioningly "What is it that you are going to tonight exactly?"

"Um..." _c'mon Bella, think, think _"...um..." My mind had gone completely blank. Charlie was still looking at me curiously when the doorbell rang C_rap. It couldn't be that time already._ Charlie motioned to get the door "No, dad" I stumbled, rushing to stop him. "It's for me"

"Really?" He smiled knowingly "And who would it be? Angela? Jessica? _Mike_, perhaps?"

I screwed my nose up at the last suggestion. As far off as Mike was from Jake, Charlie had picked the right gender.

_Dammit _I was going to have to tell him. Why had Jacob insisted on picking me up?

"Um, no. Actually, It's Jacob"

"Jacob?" Charlie questioned. He was stunned. I could almost here the click as his brain put one-and-one together

"Yes, um, Jacob Black"

"Yea, yea, I know who Jacob is silly. But what's he doin' takin' you out tonight?"

"Well....um..." The doorbell rang again "One minute" I said before skittering awkwardly to the door. I swung it open and sighed in relief.

He was here. Jake stood on the porch wearing a faded black suit. His hair was spiked, not naturally as it would normally have been, but with hair gel. In his hand he held a single red rose. He was so charmingly handsome that I felt immediately grateful that he had chosen me. He could have had any girl he wanted, but he had picked me. I sighed. He was so perfect. He had even worn a tie for the occasion. It was dark blue, the same shade as my dress. We matched perfectly. "Hey" I greeted him faintly

"Hey" he responded stepping closer and handing me the rose "This is for you. Although I would hate to be this rose at the moment. Your beauty outshines anything it ever had" I felt my cheeks grow hot and smiled. He beamed back before moving closer still, bending down. My mind clouded. The closeness of him made my heart beat faster "Uh, Jake" I whispered, knowing what we had to do (and what we couldn't do)

"Yea" he whispered in a husky voice. He was making it extraordinarily difficult for me to resist closing the distance between us.

"Charlie's listening. He knows you're taking me out. Should we tell him?"

Jake nodded and took in a deep breath before pulling away unwillingly. "Won't you come in?" I asked, raising my voice a little louder to ensure that Charlie heard me. Jake raised one eyebrow but walked in, through the door that I held open for him. "Wait" I whispered and entwined my fingers with his. "There, now I'm ready" We walked in the direction of the kitchen.

Charlie almost fell off his chair as we came around the corner. He had been caught trying to rock his chair far enough to the side to get a glimpse of us at the front door. I suppressed a giggle and stared at my father.

I felt self-conscious standing there in front of him as he surveyed us. His eyes moved from my eyes, thick with mascara, and my grinning mouth, glistening with lip-gloss, to mine and Jake's hands intertwined, hanging loosely between the two of us. Charlie's mouth hung open as he looked up at Jake, also grinning.

"Hi Charlie" Jake greeted him, happily.

"Hi...uh....Jake" Charlie was struggling.

I decided to intervene "Dad? Sorry, but we should probably get going"

Charlie shook his head to clear it before composing himself and putting on his official police voice "Alright then. Now Jake, I don't want any funny business. She's to be home by midnight and no later. You got that, son?"

"Got it chief" Jake answered seriously, standing up perfectly straight in a mock-impersonation of a soldier taking orders from his captain.

"Okay then, well, you kids enjoy yourselves"

"Thanks Charlie" Jake grinned and put out his hand to shake Charlie's. Charlie accepted, but about halfway though the shake he pulled his hand from where it had gotten lost in Jake's, a look of surprise on his face. "Boy, son, that's some grip you got there"

"Whoops, sorry Charlie. Don't know my own strength"

"Yea, right" said Charlie, a bit dazed "Well, see you later"

Jake and I turned for the door but before we could leave Charlie put a hand on my shoulder. I turned. "Bells, could I talk to you for a second?" I turned back to Jake. He shrugged his shoulders.

"It's alright with me. We still have 5 minutes before we have to leave. I'll wait in the car" I gave his hand a tight squeeze before letting go and watching him walk to the door. I turned back to Charlie. His expression was one of pure joy. Anyone would have thought he'd just one the 20 million dollar lotto draw. His voice was faster than usual. "Bells, Do you realise how happy I am for you and Jacob?" I shook my head, bewildered at my father's sudden need to reveal his feelings. Usually he just hid them away and never spoke about these sorts of things. I was much like him in these situations. It took me a long time to trust someone enough to tell them what I was thinking. Charlie continued "I'm glad you picked him. He's good for you, and you're good for him too." If it was at all possible for my smile to get any bigger, it would have. I opened my mouth to speak, but found that I couldn't. I was so happy that tears began to form in my eyes. "Bells? What's wrong?"

"N....Nothing" I stammered through my choked voice. I shook my head and threw my arms around his waist. "Thanks D...Dad. That m...means a...a lot" Charlie patted my head awkwardly. Obviously my show of emotion was just as bizarre to him as his was to me. Then I remembered that Jake was still waiting for me in the car. "Sorry Dad. I've got to go" I pulled back and gave him a light kiss on the cheek. "See you later"

"Bye Bells. Oh, and Bella?"

"Yea?" I already had one foot out the door.

"You look absolutely beautiful"

I smiled back at him, knowing how rare it was for him to speak his mind. "Thankyou Dad. I love you" I stepped through the doorway and half-jogged to the car, watching every step I took in my precarious heels.

Jake was waiting in the driver's seat, just as he had promised. When I reached the door he leant over from the opposite side of the car to open it for me. "Thanks" I said, quickly wiping at the happy tears that had collected at the corners of my eyes. Jake didn't miss anything. "Wasn't Charlie happy?"

"No, he was ecstatic actually. He's really happy for us" I smiled brightly, but Jake was still confused. His eyebrows were furrowed.

"But then why were you crying?"

I laughed quietly. "Because I'm so happy"

"okaaaay..." Jake was blatantly confused

"It's a girl thing"

"Ohhh..." Jake seemed to understand this at least. The corners of his mouth perked up slightly. His hand found mine and he intertwined our fingers yet again. With my other hand I flipped down the mirror above my seat. Nothing was smudged. _Thank goodness for waterproof mascara_ I thought. We reversed from the driveway, ready for our first real date.

_So, what did you think? Remember to review so I can upload the next chapter! :D_


	7. Here in your Arms

_Oh my gosh. Words cannot describe how I am feeling at the moment. We have our exams coming up very soon and the stress is starting to build up. I have been staying up to the early hours of the morning just trying to get my homework finished. Hopefully I will able to keep writing but my updates may not be as regular (or at least there probably won't be as many) I am not sure what my life will be like for the next few weeks but I can see it being pretty hectic. I will attempt to update when I can. So, I left you at the end of our last chapter together with a small hint of blackmailing :) well, I can happily say that you guys astounded me with your responses and I thank you so much. Every notice I receive means a lot. Usually I would reply personally to every notice but there were just so many :) so here's a huge thank you too everyone. You make writing truly worth-while. Bella and Jake's love would never have come this far without you. Merci beaucoup pour tout mes amis! Je t'aime,_

_Until our next chapter together,_

_leeleerose xx_

HERE IN YOUR ARMS

"_Please_ Jake?" I asked again putting on my most pleading voice. Jake sighed and rolled his eyes in my direction. We had just left my house for our first date, and were on our way to.....well, that was just it. I didn't know where! I had never thought to ask. However, Jake had refused to tell me when I had, saying that it was a 'surprise'.

"But, _Jake, _I want to know" I batted my eyelashes hopefully. He just laughed again "No Bells, it'll be better as a surprise". I crossed my arms in a huff and slouched in my seat. I diverted my sight away from Jake's eyes, always flittering around him, but never actually meeting his gaze. I could hear him laugh quietly at my behaviour. I knew I was being childish but I really did want to know where it was he was taking me.

We had been driving for at least 20 minutes, which was a long time for the little town of Forks. We had started off in the direction of La Push, but after reaching the outskirts Jacob had taken a right turn onto a smaller road that lead into the forest. My mind was working overtime. Where would we be going in the forest? As far as I knew there was nowhere to eat out this way. Not to mention that the forest was a dangerous place these days. I knew that somewhere out there Laurent was waiting for me, and not far behind him would be Victoria.

I shivered violently. Jake noticed my sudden reaction and put his arm around my shoulders, pulling me close to his warm chest. It was a nice feeling to be so close yet not feel any pressure to have to talk. I counted each of Jake's slow deep breaths. Suddenly I felt extremely sleepy. I lay my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes. Maybe, when I woke up Laurent and Victoria would be gone, and I would be able to sleep without fear.

Before I knew it a warm whisper was waking me from my sleep. "We're almost there Bells" I sat up slowly, yawned silently and blinked a few times before I was able to comprehend what Jake had said. Finally it clicked and I felt wide awake. We were almost there. My heart began beating faster as nerves kicked in.

I knew it was stupid to be nervous. This wasn't like a normal first date. Jake and I had technically already gone out before. For some reason though I couldn't stop the pounding of my heart reaching my ears. It resounded so loudly that I was sure that Jake would hear it.

Jake got out of the car and walked swiftly around to my door. He opened it and offered me his hand, which I accepted gratefully. Although I couldn't see very far by the light emitted by the car's headlights I knew that we were in a small clearing, somewhere in the middle of the forest. This was not an area that I had ever been to before but I knew that just like the rest of the forest, the floor would be covered in sticks, leaves and stones. For anyone else this may have been completely fine. However, I had a tendency to get to know the ground a bit better than I would have liked, even when I was wearing hiking boots. I had a pretty good idea that heels were going to end in tragedy.

Jake helped me out of the car and taking my hand, began to walk me towards the edge of the clearing. At first I couldn't see a thing but gradually my eyes adjusted to the soft moonlight. The night's cool breeze was pleasant on my skin. I took each step with caution, making sure that Jake was always close in case an unexpected twig decided to attack. My heels sunk into the dirt a few centimeters causing me to grasp a hold of Jake's shoulder. We walked like that, my hand gripping his shoulder and his arm hovering around me, ready to steady me should I need help. It never actually touched my waist or back, but I could feel the heat radiating off him nonetheless.

We had walked about 20 meters when I saw a narrow path winding through the trees. My mind seized with fear and my legs stopped moving. I was frozen. _Laurent and Victoria. _I was putting Jake in danger by letting him continue down this path. They could be anywhere. I couldn't lose him.

Jake had kept tried to keep walking forwards, into danger. My hand was still gripping his shoulder, causing me to pivot slightly on my buried heel. I tugged gently on the hand that Jake had hovering near my waist.

"Jake..." My voice was filled with concern as it drew out his name in warning. "I don't think this is such a good idea"

"It's alright Bells. I've been here plenty of times. I know these woods well"

"But, Jake, there could be anything hiding in those trees"

Jake turned completely, retraced his steps and bent down slightly so that he face was mere inches from mine. His dark eyes sparkled in the soft moonlight. "Bells, I won't let anything hurt you. I could never let anything happen to you" The wind swept around us, making my hair dance across my face. Jake raised his hand to place a lost strand back into place. "Trust me Bells"

Those three simple words played on my emotions. I trusted Jacob with all my heart. I trusted him with my life. Surely Laurent and Victoria wouldn't be here tonight. I hadn't seen any signs that would suggest that they were. Anyway, Jake had said that he knew these woods well. It couldn't be that dangerous. Not just this once anyway. I nodded "I trust you, Jake". He grinned before letting out a quiet "Hmmm..." Jake's face was thoughtful. "You may have some difficulty getting through there in one piece" he said gesturing at the narrow path before glancing down at my choice of footwear. "Sorry" I said, "I shouldn't have chanced it. It was fruitless from the start" Jake smiled down at me. "I don't mind. This way I have an excuse to do this" With that Jake removed his hand from mine and scooped me up in his arms in one smooth movement. His arms curled under my legs and shoulders. I looked up at him with surprise. "This way we'll get there faster" I grinned. "Lead on, maestro" Jake raised an eyebrow at me

"Maestro?..."

"What?" I said defensively, "It sounded right in my head" Jacob chuckled, his chest vibrating. Jake started along the narrow path.

We were definitely moving at a much faster pace with me in Jake's arms. I hadn't realised how slowly I must have been moving in the clearing. Not only was it faster, but it was also preferable lying in Jake's warm arms. The wind had picked up a notch. My thin cardigan and knee length dress didn't offer much in the way of warmth. Instinctively, I recoiled from the cold, turning my body so that it was protected. I buried my face in Jake's chest, reveling in the comforting feeling it brought with it. I closed my eyes drifting into a day-dream state.

At one point I was sure that Jake had leant his face close to mine and kissed my hair lightly, but I was too lost in his heat to know for shore.

Before long I felt Jake begin to slow down. I opened my eyes to find that I could see Jake's face perfectly. His features were lit so that his long lashes made shadows on his cheeks, his lips contoured so that a small shadow formed on his chin. Jake glanced down to see me staring up at him. His eyes bore into mine as he spoke "We're here, Bella" I turned in Jake's arms.

"Where?" I asked, not able to see a thing. Jake nodded in the direction of a less dense patch of trees. My eyes opened in amazement as I realised what I saw. It was the most beautiful little cottage I had ever seen.

It was made of stone. The large slates seemed to be connected only by green moss. The cottage was so like nature it seemed that it had grown here with the trees. It belonged. Sky-high trees surrounded it on every side, hiding it from harms way. If I hadn't been expecting it I would have never seen it, mistaking it for a part of the natural surroundings.

Jake placed me down gently. My heels sunk into the moist earth. Taking my hand he began to lead me towards the half-hidden cottage.

I gasped when Jake swung open the tiny cottage door. If I had thought the outside had looked beautiful it was nothing compared to the interior. The cottage consisted of just one main room, such as a hotel would have, with two doors on the opposite side of the thresh hold, which were presumably the bathroom and kitchen. There was a small round table made of a dark wood positioned in the centre of the room. A chair sat at either end. The table settings were simple yet elegant. A glass vase holding a single red rose inhabited the centre of the table. It stood tall and proud. There were two lit candles placed symmetrically to the rose. The candles flickered slightly as a gush of wind came through the door. I stepped inside quickly. Jake followed, pulling the tiny door closed behind him.

From my position inside I saw a tiny fireplace in the corner that spread its warmth to every corner of the room. Jake looked huge in this tiny 'dwarf' house. His head almost brushed the ceiling. I stared up at him in amazement. He was looking intently back at me with kind, loving eyes. "Wow Jake. This is beautiful" I reached out to take his hands, one in each of mine. Facing him I swung our hands side to side between us. "Thank you" I said standing on my tiptoes to kiss him on the corner of the mouth. I felt his lips pull up into a small smile under mine. I looked up from his lips. His eyes were closed, his lips now slightly parted in response to my touch. "My pleasure" He breathed in answer.

"No one has ever done anything like this for me before" I spoke quietly, not wanting to disturb him when he looked so peaceful, not to mention how tempting he was. "Well, we're in the same boat for that one. I've never done anything like this for anyone before. This is all new to me"

"It's perfect Jake. There's nothing I would change, especially not this" I whispered, leaning in to his ear.

"Mmmm...." Jake agreed almost silently, taking his hands from mine to grab a hold of my waist, pulling me closer.

We stood like that for some time. Being with Jake made me feel so lighthearted that it made me want to sing. I was so engrossed in him that I barely heard the alarm coming from the kitchen. Jake sighed and pulled away slowly. I attempted to pull him back to me, knowing that it was futile. He chuckled lowly. "I only wish I could leave dinner a longer, but I doubt that you want to eat charcoaled chicken for dinner"

"You cooked dinner?" I asked in awe. Jake nodded. I had always been the one to do the cooking. With my mum and dad's skills it was easy to see why, but I never knew that Jake could cook. "Then let's go save this chicken before it burns" I said and began walking towards the kitchen. Jake slipped his finger into the back of my halter dress. I gasped with surprise as he pulled me back gently. "No Bella. You sit down. I'm doing everything tonight. You just relax" I pouted but was secretly grinning inside. He was such a gentleman. I hadn't completely relaxed since _that _day.

Jake placed his hands on my shoulders and steered me to one of the wooden chairs next to the little round table. He pulled it out and gestured for me to sit down. "Merci monsieur" I said. My French accent was horrible but I stood tall, curtsied and took my seat. Jake couldn't suppress the laugh he was holding back. He walked quickly towards the kitchen but hadn't quite made it to the door when it slipped.

"I heard that" I warned him. This only made him laugh more. He bent over double, completely amused at my strangeness. His laugh was contagious. Before long I was laughing at myself. "Jake, the chicken" I reminded him through breaths of laughter. "Oh, yea" He said, wiping tears from his eyes. He straightened himself before disappearing into the kitchen.

I waited patiently for Jake. It had been only 5 minutes when he re-emerged, a glorious smell wafting after him. He came to the table and placed a white porcelain plate in front of me. He lifted the cover, revealing a piece of delicious roast chicken surrounded by vegetables. It smelt absolutely divine. "Wow" I exclaimed "This looks fabulous Jake. I don't know if I'll ever cook again knowing that this is what you can do" Jake grinned, placing his own plate down before seating himself across from me. "You'd better taste it before you gloat for it" He said, nodding towards the succulent chicken breast.

I cut a small portion and chewed slowly, making sure that it lasted as long as possible. "So........?" Jake said uncertainly.

"I shook my head, no way am I ever cooking again. From now on you're making the meals" Jake smiled broadly and tucked into his own.

The chicken was just the first example of Jake's secret culinary talent. After we had eaten every morsel on the plate he whisked the empty plates away and returned with two large bowls filled with homemade custard. Again it was absolutely delicious. As we ate we talked. It wasn't just idle chit-chat, but questions about one another. I found out so much about him like how his father was the leader of sorts of the Quillette tribe and how he had missed me when I left to live with my Mum (_haha, can you tell I'm an Aussi from my spelling?! :D)_ in Phoenix. I also revealed a lot about myself to Jake like how I had never really liked Phil, but as long as my mum was happy I didn't mind who she was with.

Jake and I spoke for a long time after dinner, talking about everything from sports, to school. Even past pets made its way in there somehow. All in all it was only when I glanced at my watch and saw that it was already 11:15pm that I felt that we should probably get going. "I don't want Charlie to regret letting me go out tonight" I said as I stood. Jake came around to my side of the table. He pushed my chair in for me, took my hand and blew out the candles before leaving.

Just as he had before Jake lifted me bridle style and carried me back to the clearing. As we reached the end of the dense forest trees Jake placed me on the ground, keeping his hands on my waist. "Bella, before we go I want to thank you" His voice was low and soft, his face an inch from mine. "What for Jake? You did everything tonight, remember?"

His eyes looked into mine. All of his focus was on me. Little me. He could see me, and not just my physical appearance, but straight through me and into my heart and soul. Only Jake could do that. Jake shook his head slightly, still keeping his eyes locked with mine. "No" he said slowly "You made all this possible Bella. This night was perfect because you were here." He leant closer and pressed his forehead to mine. I sighed, breathing in his scent. "I disagree" I spoke carefully, attempting to sound coherent even though I was lost in his presence. "It was you" I leaned closer still. our breath mingled in the small space between us, creating a new stronger scent. It was sweet and woody. A combination I had never really thought of before. It made me think of cinnamon and butterscotch, or a forest after the rain. "You are extremely stubborn" Jake breathed. I smiled against his lips "I'm never give in" Jake's hands suddenly gripped my waist tighter, pulling me against him. My mouth found his. The kiss felt urgent and full of passion. My hands moved up his chest before snaking their way around his neck. I pressed myself closer, asking for more but Jake broke away.

"Bells, I don't think it's a wise idea to continue with this" His breath washed over my face.

"Why not?" I asked, trying to pull myself up to kiss his soft lips. Jake pushed me away gently.

"You're father may not agree with you being back late and being a floor rug was not on my list of things to do before I die" I sighed but accepted the truth. Jake bent down to kiss me firmly on the cheek before taking my hand and leading me to the car.


	8. Total Eclipse of the Heart

_Hey Guys!_

_So, I managed to get up another chapter. Yay me! __ I was bored with studying and doing my homework so I took a few hours off and this was the result. I hope it was worth it. I am thinking that I might get in trouble from my teachers but as long as you guys enjoy it I don't really mind. Keep sending those reviews in. I love hearing from you all. They really do make my day, especially when that day has been filled with Maths and Chem. I'm not really sure why I chose to do 6 TEE subjects. Oh well, I'm sure I'll survive. Only a week left until my first exam, Chem! :s_

_Well, enough about me. You probably want to know how Jake and Bella are going _

_Love and best wishes,_

_Leeleerose xx_

TOTAL ECLIPSE OF THE HEART

I woke up on that bright Sunday morning to the sound of Sara Bareilles' _Love Song. _My mind was still fuzzy as I reflexively reached out for my mobile, searching the top of my bedside table blindly. Finally I found the smooth, cold object and managed to hold it in my still weak grip. It seemed that my muscles didn't want to work properly, not to mention that my mind was still half asleep. The bright glare of the illuminated screen made me wince and squint my eyes. Braving a closer look I read that it was Jake. I pressed the green button and held the phone up to my ear.

"Hello" I greeted him, trying to sound happy and alert but failing dismally. Instead my voice came out croaky and expressionless, still groggy with sleep.

"Hey"

I heard his deep voice answer from the other end of the line.

"Sorry, I hope I didn't wake you but I couldn't wait any longer"

I could hear the guilt in his voice. Glancing over at the radio clock I realized that it was already 11:17am. Wow, no wonder he had thought that I would be awake by now.

"No, it's alright. I'm glad you stopped me from wasting any more of my day. How are you?"

"Great" He replied, "How are you?"

"A bit tired, but otherwise much the same" I paused, wondering how to continue. "So, what did you want to talk to me about?"

"Oh, nothing in particular. I just wanted to hear your voice again. After last night I just can't get you off my mind."

I smiled "You're still on mine too Jake" I answered. Then I had a crazy idea. "Hey, would you like to come over for lunch today? Charlie's gone fishing for the day. I was about to make lunch but since you have been keeping your culinary talents a secret from me I thought that in return you would be able to teach me something"

"Sure" Jake said quickly "I'll be there in ten" I laughed at his eagerness

"Kay, see you soon"

"Bye Bells. Love you"

"I love you too Jake. Bye" I pressed the end call button feeling high-spirited.

By the time that Jake arrived I had taken the quickest shower ever and gotten dressed in record time. I wore dark blue denim jeans with my favourite cream coloured top. As soon as the doorbell rang I bounded down the stairs, two at a time, and flung the door open. Once my brain processed his dark-brown windswept hair and his tan skin it took my body no more than a second to respond. I threw myself at him and flung my arms around his neck, pulling myself closer to his beautiful face. I could hear Jake let out a breath of air as I caught him off guard, but as I hugged him tighter his brain seemed to catch up.

"Good afternoon Bella" He said.

I widened my eyes innocently. "But it's only 11:30"

Jake looked down at me, smirking at my reaction "So it is" He answered in a breath before planting a short but sweet kiss on my waiting lips. I sighed when he pulled away. "Would you like to come in?" I asked, releasing him slightly to gesture to the front door. "Well, we probably should move this indoors, but we wouldn't want the neighbours to talk." He said suggestively, a glint in his eye.

"Of course they won't talk. They probably won't even notice that you're here" I teased. Jake scoffed "Why not?" he asked "Wouldn't they worry about some tall, handsome man stealing a young girls virtue?" I blushed but decided to explain. "Well, since my 'breakdown' the neighbours have ignored almost everything that happens at our house. I suspect that it became boring for them, always watching me doing the same thing day-in and day-out. My zombie-like self was certainly a party pooper." I looked down at his feet. Even when I had managed to slip on a pair of thongs as I hurried out of my room this boy's feet were bare. Did he never wear shoes?

Jake bent down slightly to whisper in my ear. "Well then, if the neighbours aren't going to notice, what are we still doing standing outside?" I giggled and looked up at him. Grasping his hand firmly I lead him into the house.

Once inside I pulled Jake into the kitchen.

"So, Chef" I said, a slight upbeat evident in my voice "What are we going to make for lunch?"

Jake pressed his lips together thoughtfully, wriggling his nose ever so slightly. "What about something simple to start with? We can start at the beginning"

"Okay" I agreed, getting excited "What about you teach me how to make the perfect toasted sandwich?"

Jake grinned "Deal"

I was in such a good mood with Jake here that I almost danced around the kitchen. I hummed _Whistle while you work_ as I gathered the items that we would need to make lunch. It was great to finally feel free again. This sensation was almost alien to me now. It felt so strange to not need to hold myself in when I was with Jake. He kept me sane. It felt as though a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders.

Jake laughed as I skipped from the fridge to the pantry and back to him, making a circuit around the kitchen. Eventually I had all the things I thought we might need to make the world's nest toasted sandwich. Jake stared at me with wide eyes.

"Bella, I don't think we're going to need all this," He said in an amused voice. I shrugged my shoulders and looked admirably at my pile of food. I had collected almost every vegetable the fridge stocked, several varieties of meat left over from previous meals and all the different kinds of sauces imaginable. I couldn't help but laugh at the thought of what sorts of combinations were possible.

Brocolli, mustard and pork……..urgh, that would definitely be disgusting.

After sifting through the foods that we were definitely not using Jake and I were left with a few possibilities. I wanted to try a mix of ham, cheese and onion but Jake managed to convince me otherwise. Eventually we decided on chicken, cheese, wholegrain mustard and avocado. This was going to be delicious.

Jake cut up slices of cheese, leftover roast chicken and avocado while I flitted around the kitchen putting back all the other items. By the time that I had finished Jake was just sprinkling grated tasty cheese over the top of the sandwiches. He topped all three (two for him and one for me) with another slice of bread before putting them in the sandwich press. I sighed. It seemed so easy for him. There was no doubt about it, he was definitely a natural cook.

Jake turned from the sandwich press, dusting his hands of breadcrumbs with a slight clapping motion. "So, they'll take about 10 minutes to cook. What do you propose we do in the meanwhile?" I smiled mischievously. "Well you see, I went on this date the other night with this 'kind of' beautiful guy…"

I could feel my cheeks going red. "Oh, is that right?" said Jake, playing along. "And so, what happened? Does this guy deserve a beating?"

"No, no. He was the perfect gentleman"

"Is that right?" I nodded

"We kissed," I said quietly, my nerves twisting in my stomach "we kissed and it was the most beautiful thing. I haven't really thought about anything else since then. Now I'm craving more…"

"Then let's treat that craving" He said as he reached out to take my hands, pulling me until I collided lightly with his chest. It was as though he could read my mind. Warmth radiated through me as he moved one hand to my waist while his other pressed against the small of my back, pulling me flush against him. I sighed, pressing myself to him. My arms reached up to circle around his neck. Jake bent down and placed his lips against mine.

I was lost in the magic of it all. My mind was a haze of warmth. It was perfect. Jake was careful at first. His mouth moved sweetly against mine. Our movements were perfectly synchronised. Slowly the kiss grew. It was no longer sweet and innocent, but filled with passion and love. I couldn't help myself from exploring his body. My hands seemed to move of their own accord as they ran down his biceps, his muscles tight as he held me to him. My hands wandered back up to his neck, playing with the soft hair there. I ran my fingers through the strands, gently untangling the few that had managed to intertwine. But then something happened. A feeling of electricity ran through us. It caused me to shiver. I knew that Jake had felt it too, How could he not? My mind and body suddenly craved him. All of him. A voice in my head urged me on. Jake loved me. How bad would it be for us to go a bit further than I had planned? Our kisses became more enthusiastic. My hands grabbed fistfuls of his short-cropped hair, pulling my body even closer to his. Jake's arms acted like a vice, holding me tightly against him. His hold was so unyielding that any breath that I managed to snatch between the onslaught of his kisses was short lived. His hands were pressing tightly to the small amount of skin exposed at the waist of my jeans. I wouldn't be surprised if it would bruise. I didn't mind though. His body was so irresistible. Every muscle was defined. I could feel his hard stomach; every plane was smooth and chiselled. However, it was also very warm. So warm that I had begun to swelter. There was no air, only Jake. All too soon my body was screaming in protest. I needed to get out. I broke away, gasping for air. Jake looked at me, bewilderment etched on his face. Realisation dawned in his eyes as he saw how red my heated skin was. He let go immediately. My skin welcomed the cool kitchen air, I filled my lungs, breathing deeper now that my heart was beginning to slow.

"Sorry" Jake said, his eyes closed, breathing uneven. After a few moments his breathing returned to normal again. He opened his eyes. The dark brown met min. "Did I hurt you?" He asked concernedly.

"No" I shook my head slightly "Quite the opposite actually"

There was a short pause in which he and I swapped smiles. "What was that?" I asked carefully/"I'm not exactly sure" said Jake in a soft voice. His eyes penetrated into my soul, searching, for something. They widened slightly as though he had found something there.

"What?" I asked, more curious than ever

Jake shook his head as though to clear it "Nothing"

My mind was reeling. What _was _that? What did Jake know that he wasn't telling me? My thoughts were interrupted by a loud growling sound that emulated from my stomach. Jake laughed. "Lunchtime" He chimed, and went over to serve up the best toasted sandwiches ever.

So, what do you think? Was it good or bad? Remember I won't know what you like if you don't review I wasn't planning on all this happening this soon in the story but I didn't want to keep you guys waiting for much longer (plus I really need to get to what's coming or else I might never get there!

In one of the reviews I received I was asked what are the names of the artists who wrote the songs that inspire me. Overall, New Soul is inspired by Yael Naim's song of the same title. One day I was just singing along when a whole story line popped right into my little head. Amazing right?

Here is a list of the other artists:

New Soul – Yael Naim

Lost without you – Delta Goodrem

Begin Again – Colbie Caillat

Catch me when I fall – written by my friend

Somethin' Special – Colbie Caillat

Ready – Kelly Clarkson

Here in your arms – hellogoodbye

Other artists that I plan on including are B*Witched, Taylor Swift, Rob Thomas, Brian McFadden and S club 7……...just because I can :p

Anyway, I'd better get back to school work. A bientot mes amies :D

Just remember, si tu travaille dure, tout est possible,

Until our next chapter,

Leeleerose xx


	9. Innocent Eyes

INNOCENT EYES

_Hey everyone! So, I'm halfway through my exams and I needed a break, so once again I let my imagination take me into the lives of Jake and Bella. I wasn't sure about this chapter to begin with. It seemed a little odd in the start, but I think the ending is my favourite part of the story so far. _

_Happy reading,_

_Love leeleerose xx_

The past week had been extremely strange. After what Jake and I had experienced last Sunday I wasn't sure what to expect. Sure, I had been busy with school and Billy had needed Jake to help out with a lot at home, but I hadn't seen him once. We had spoken on the phone, but it just wasn't the same as him being there.

My mind was still wondering what had happened during our kiss. It was like nothing I had ever felt before. Even now, having not seen Jake for a whole week my body and mind were craving him more than ever. He was my life. Even my classes at school reminded me of him.

In Biology we had been studying the process of photosynthesis. Of course one of the key reagents needed for this process was the sun..._my own personal sun._ See what I mean? English hadn't been much better. The protagonist of the film we were studying had short dark hair, which only meant that I always wanted to run my hands through it.

Our phone calls had been short. A quick "Hello, How are you?" and that was it. I hadn't had the nerve to talk about what had happened between us. Jake was acting as though nothing was wrong, but there was something inside of me that told me not everything was right.

To start off with Jake had sounded happier than ever. He seemed as over the moon as I was. For a while there I thought that he felt the same way as I did, excited and completely in love. However, as the week had progressed Jake's mood seemed to worsen. The spark and joy in his voice that I had associated with feeling safe had disappeared to leave behind something lifeless and hollow.

Still, he played on my mind like a bow on a string. I had a never-ending buzz. This surely not a healthy habit to be getting myself into, thinking about my boyfriend 24-7, but I couldn't help it. Maybe if I saw Jake again the need would go away and I would be able to concentrate on my studies. Then again, what if that only made it worse? What if I was never going to be able to get him off my mind? I wasn't complaining, he was a wonderful person to think about, but I had never felt anything like this before. Even when I had been with _him _he had never consumed my mind so completely.

I was so caught up in my own thoughts that I hadn't noticed the phone ring. It wasn't until Charlie came in from the lounge room, obviously flustered to have gotten up at such a crucial part of the game.

"Hey Bells, could you get that for me?" Normally Charlie would have been out fishing but today's weather was forecast to rain, so he had stayed home to watch the game on TV.

"Sure" I mumbled my mind still on Jake. With that Charlie was gone.

As I reached out to pick up the phone the ringing clicked over to our message bank and Charlie's voice echoed slightly in the kitchen "Hey, This is the Swan residence. Please leave a message" *beep*

"Hi, um, I was just calling to speak to Bella" A new voice now filled my ears. Jake cleared his throat. His voice was slightly husky, even over the phone "So, yea. Give me a call ba..."

"Jake" I gasped, grabbing the phone from the receiver.

"Bells" Jake sounded more than relieved. "How are you?" he asked.

"Great now that I can finally talk to you again" I breathed. I wished now, more than ever, that he was here with me in my kitchen, and that we could continue where we'd left off last week...

"Hey, Jake?"

"Yeah"

"Do you want to come around to my place today?"

"Arrrrrgh..." Jake sounded disappointed. "I would love to Bells" he hesitated for just a split second "but my Dad really needs me at home today."

"Oh, okay" I said, unable to hide my own discontent.

"But there's no reason why you can't come down to La Push" He said. His voice seemed to gain confidence as he said this. My heart soared. "Sure. When should I come down?"

"Now" Jake answered, barely missing a beat. "Meet me on the beach"

"Okay, see you soon"

"Bye Bells, I love you"

"As I love you Jake"

I hung up the phone and sprinted up the stairs to my room. I grabbed my mobile and jacket then pretty much leaped down the stairs and rushed to the door. _Maybe everything's okay after all._

"Bye Dad" I called, already on the front steps

"Where's the fire?" Charlie asked amusedly

"I'm gonna go see Jake' I yelled over my shoulder as I jumped into the drivers seat of the truck. I chucked my jacket and phone onto the passenger's side before throwing it into gear. My truck groaned in protest as I pulled sharply out of the driveway and onto the street, pushing its' precious speed limit.

I reached Jake's house just as it began to drizzle rain. Quickly I grabbed my jacket and jumped out of the car before sprinting in the direction of the beach. By the time I reached the shore the wind had begun to pick up. I put my jacket on and pulled the hood up to shield my face. It was difficult to run on the sand, so instead I walked as fast as I could.

I knew where I was going. Something told me that Jake would be waiting just up past the next bend. It was as though there was an invisible string connecting us both. There was an indiscernible bond between us pulling me in his direction. I quickened my pace.

When I finally got to our spot I was comforted to see that he was already there. The corners of his mouth pulled into a tight, relieved smile as I rounded the corner.

"Bella"

"Hey"

I just stood there. He looked so tired. There were dark circles around his eyes. The normally neat hair was rather scruffy. Tangled strands blew across his face and around his head like a halo. Even in this cold wind, he sat on an old driftwood log wearing nothing but denim shorts that cut off at the knee. His chest was bare, yet he was not shivering. I walked towards him, pulling my jacket tight around me. "How have you been?" I had to work hard to keep my voice steady. What could have happened to make him like this?

"Okay" He said, his voice rough, eyes glinting with sadness. Tears began to form in my eyes.

I looked at the ground

"C'mere" Jake said, holding his arms out, waiting.

I walked forwards, straight into his arms, which then curled around me, protecting my body from the wind. His arms, just as warm as I remembered, gently guided me down to sit next to him on the log.

It felt safe to be held by Jake. It was like neither of us could be hurt if we were together. Maybe that was why Jake was sad. I wasn't there for him when he really needed it. I had been a horrible girlfriend. Even as a friend I hadn't been the best. I should have put everything else aside and visited, no matter what he said. I could have stopped him from feeling so sad. This was entirely my fault.

I could feel the tears well up inside of me and begin to cascade down my cheeks. Jake's hold on me became stronger. I rested my chin on his broad shoulder and pressed my face into his neck.

"Please talk to me" I whispered through the sobs

"About what?" He answered softly

"Tell me what's wrong. What happened this week? What happened to you, to us?" Jake took a shaky breath. I could feel it reverberating through his chest.

"I needed to see you"

"But, every time I was free you were busy. It's not your fault that you needed to help Billy out around the house" I said, defending both of us for our actions. But Jake stopped me from going any further "It isn't Billy. It's Sam"

"Oh" I said quietly. My tears turned to those of anger.

The last time Jake and I had talked about Sam had been that day when I had gone to his house for answers. That was the day we argued. It was all because of Sam. My muscles tensed, holding Jake tighter. Jake seemed to notice the change in my mood.

"Bella, please don't. You wanted to know. Now just listen. Please"

His voice was almost pleading. He was dead serious about this. I nodded, bumping my chin a little on his shoulder.

"Sam is good Bella. He's been helping me."

"With what?"

Jake hesitated "There's been some..._things_...things that I wanted to tell you about. But...I couldn't, and I still can't. I've tried so many times to bring myself to do it, but I just can't" Jakes voice was weak. It wavered in the wind. If we hadn't been so close I don't think I could have heard it at all.

"Usually I agree with Sam, but not this time. Not now"

"What don't you agree on Jake?"

"I want to tell you..." He whispered, his voice breaking with emotion

"I know. You can, I'll listen"

I could feel Jake tense, his strong arms constricting my movement.

"I know you'll listen, but I don't know if I _want_ you to"

"What do you mean?"

"Once I let you in, Bells, there is no way out. Trust me; if I could leave all this behind, I would. You would be safe. I would be able to stay with you without you being in constant danger"

"I'm not in danger from anything Jake," I said, knowing that this was a downright lie. I was in danger. There was the continuous threat of Victoria and Laurent to worry about. But Jake couldn't be talking about that. He didn't even know that vampires existed, let alone that there were two out there right now trying to avenge James.

"No Bella, you are. The guys, they've been telling me not to see you. They're mad at me for not following his instructions"

"These _guys, _they include Embry don't they? And the one giving the instructions is Sam?"

"Yes" I could feel the muscles in my face pull tight into a grimace.

"He has no say in what you do Jake. Your life is none of his business, and as far as I'm concerned he has no say in what my boyfriend does or does not do"

Jake's eyes seemed to lighten. My heart fluttered at the word 'boyfriend'. The happiness was short lived however, as his face quickly became solemn once more. He seemed to be getting frustrated.

"It's not like that Bella. I've told you. I have no choice but to listen to Sam. Even if I deny his wishes and hate what he tells me I can't disobey a direct order. But I can't stay away from you either. Even if his orders are for your own safely, I am so selfish that I want to defy it. I know what I felt last week and I know that what we have is real."

I turned my head to press my lips to his neck "I know that too Jake. I felt it"

"I don't care what he says. You are a part of me now"

I smiled, my lips still resting against his neck. "I'm never leaving Jake" I promised.

Jake and I held each other for a few moments. It took me a while to realise that there were cold tears running down my face and neck. But I hadn't shed any of them.

I lifted my head to see Jake, crying. He was completely unguarded. It was at this moment that I could finally see past Sam's mask. There was so much weight on his shoulders. So many burdens he had to bear. Underneath it all though I knew that he was still my Jacob. He was still the Jacob I had known before this whole _Sam _thing, before that night at the cinema, even before I had met _him. _This was the Jacob I remembered from all those years ago.

Jake's breaths became sharp, a small whimper escaping with each gulp of air. His chest shook against mine, his arms gripped around me stronger than ever. I realised that he needed me just as much as I needed him, and this time I wasn't going to let him down.

I reached up and took Jake's face in my hands, wiping the moisture away with my thumbs and tracing idle shapes on his cheeks and jaw. Jake seemed to calm a little at my touch so I continued. I moved my fingers up to his eyes. They fluttered shut as I caressed them. Jake's long eyelashes were wet with tears. I drew lines across his cheekbones, down his jaw line, moving up his rigid chin until I reached his mouth, tracing the outline of his lips and the tiny spots where his skin dipped in above the perfect peaks. Jake sighed. I noticed that his arms had relaxed from their constraining hold around me. His lips opened invitingly.

"Bella" they whispered. There was a ghost of sadness behind the way he said my name. However, as soon as it left the little space between us it was lost to the wind.

"Shhhhh..." I cooed, kissing them lightly. "It's alright" I pressed my forehead to his and closed my eyes, focussing on the way his breathing matched mine.

Jake shuddered slightly and tugged at my waist to bring me closer. I moved from where I was seated on the driftwood log to his lap. Instinctively I wrapped my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist filling any space there had been between us. I could feel his breathing slow, the stuttering quiet. .

Jake and I sat like that for a long time, living off each other's presence. Each breath was synchronised, in perfect harmony. The wind continued to assault us from all angles and the drizzling rain dampened our clothes, but I didn't care. Jake needed me here and we were going to get through this together.

It seemed that I had zoned out because after a while I could hear Jake murmuring something. I strained my ears to listen.

"Bella?"

"Mmmhmmm" I answered

"Do you remember when you were seven?"

I giggled at the memory of a tiny Bella and Jacob "Of course"

Jake must have been feeling a lot better. His voice was stronger, happier than before.

"And do you remember what we used to love to do when it rained?" He asked

This time I was puzzled "No, I don't. What was it?"

Jake paused

"Make mud pies" He said and I felt his hand move to my face and smear something wet over my cheek.

"Blurgh!" I exclaimed, pulling away from his touch, my eyes opening wide. "Jake that's gross" I whined in a voice that sounded oddly like a younger Bella. I ran my hand over my cheek, cleaning off the worst of the wet dirt.

"Anyway" I continued, reaching my hand behind my back, "This is how you do it". With that I smeared my hand in the mud and wiped it across Jake's chest.

The look on his face was priceless. I began to laugh loudly which only made him more interested in the game.

"That's it" Jake said, scooping up a handful of muddy sand and forming it into a ball.

I scuffled away, out of his reach. He stood up and followed, pulling back his arm and closing one eye to aim. Thinking fast I ducked behind a rock just in time to hear the loud splattering behind me. I reached down and scooped up some more ammo and spun around the corner to fire. My aim was true. It hit Jake square in the chest, covering him in the gunk. I ran back behind the rock to 'reload'. Thinking I would get the better of Jake I scooped up an even larger ball and readied myself. I dipped around the side of the rock to shoot but to my surprise I came face to face with Jake. I hadn't expected him to be standing so close. I screamed as he flung his arms around me. The mud that I had thrown at his chest only moments before was transferred to my clothes as he pulled me to him. I struggled in his arms, only causing more of the dirt to be smudged into me. We were both laughing hysterically. I turned in his arms wanting to see his glorious smile. I giggled at what I saw. Jake's face was covered in muddy sand. Streaks of it ran across his cheeks where he had wiped his flyaway hair from his face.

"Jake" I gasped through my spurts of laughter "I remember why we used to do this now. Ten years may have passed but this will always be fun"

His grin was contagious. My cheeks were starting to hurt from smiling so much, but I just couldn't stop. There was a crash of thunder as the drizzling turned into heavier rains. The mud washed off Jake's face, sliding down his neck and chest. My clothes were soaked through, dirty and cold. Jake looked up at the dark, cloudy sky then back down at me. "Let's get you back to my place" He said, his voice warm even in the cold air.

Jake and I made it back to the house in record time. He kept me close the whole way, warming me and protecting me from the cold rain. My jacket was wet through, and completely useless. When we walked through the door the heat of the house hit me instantly. The delicious smells coming from the kitchen made it evident that Billy already had dinner on the stove.

"Jake? Is that you?" Billy's memorable voice boomed from the kitchen.

"Yea, Dad. Look who turned up"

Billy's head poked out from behind the kitchen door "Oh, good evening Bella"

"Hey Billy. That smells great"

Billy smiled at us "Family recipe. You look frozen to the core Bella. Jake, take her to get some warm clothes on, would you?" Jake nodded

"C'mon" he said, smiling affectionately. He took my hand and led me down the hall to his room.

I hadn't been in Jake's room for many years now. It was very much the same as what it used to be. The bed was in the same spot as it had always been; across from the window so that Jake could watch the trees sway in the wind. The closet stood open, clothes strewn across the floor. The racing car bedspread had been swapped for a more neutral navy blue one. A desk had been added in the corner and was adorned with papers. There were pictures and notes scattered across every inch of the dark wood. Next to the bed was a huge bookshelf filled to bursting point with books of all kinds. There were many old novels mixed in with newer ones, comic books and encyclopaedias. I noticed that my mouth was gaping open and snapped it shut. Suddenly I felt self-conscious being in his room. Even with these changes his room felt so familiar, yet so much had changed between us since the last time I had entered it all those years ago.

_I could see a little boy with his wooden truck, rolling it to and fro across the bedroom floor. A tiny girl, her hair pulled back into a tight ponytail, her fringe just covering the top of her eyes sat nearby, watching wishfully. She pulled at stray strands of the carpet beneath her. She gazed around the room, taking it all in. Her eyes began to water. The boy looked up, his baby face smiling. _

"_Do you want a go?" He asked sweetly, offering the pale white girl the truck. She shook her head. "What's the matter?" The boy asked his brow furrowing. The brown haired girl shook her head and covered her eyes with her hands. The boy put the truck down and moved over to where she sat. He attempted to pull her hands away from her face, but she wasn't giving in. The stubborn girl held her ground, keeping her telltale eyes covered. The boy seemed to be getting anxious. "Bella?" his voice was filled with worry "Bella?" He repeated, more urgenlyt. The little girl gave in, pulling her tiny hands away to reveal her brown eyes. Her cheeks were wet with tears. They glistened in the afternoon sunlight that streamed through the open window.. The boy sat on his knees, while the girl pulled hers up to her chest and hugged them tight._

"_What's the matter?" The little boy asked again, looking into her sad eyes._

_The tiny girl sniffed and spoke to her knees "Mummy and Daddy are splitting up". A single tear ran down her face. The boy reached out and wiped it away. He sat, listening contentedly. "Mummy doesn't love Daddy anymore, so she's leaving"_

"_It's okay" the boy said reassuringly "When you get lonely you can come for sleepovers, and we can play in the woods and play with the cars" The little girl started to sob. "What is it? Don't you want to play cars?" He said quickly "We could play dollies too; I mean it doesn't always have to be cars" The little girl shook her head_

"_I'm going too" she said, in barely a whisper. The little boy fell silent. His eyes filled with pain._

"_No" He said stubbornly "You can't go. Who would make mud pies with me?"_

_The girl's lower lip trembled. She was shaking. "Mummy says I have to go with her. We're going to live in Arizona."_

_The boy seemed confused. "Why?"_

"_Mummy says it's warmer there. There's lots of sun. There are lots of nice people for me to meet and I can go to school"_

_The boy moved to sit next to the girl. He wrapped his tiny arms around her shoulders. Even at this young age the difference between their skin colours was amazing. His was a tanned, rustic brown, while hers was silvery white. They sat like that, crying together._

"_Bella?" The boy said_

"_Yea?" She looked into his dark brown eyes_

"_You will always be my very best friend. You know that right?"_

_The girl nodded "And you will always be my very best friend, Jacob. I love you" she threw her arms around the boy who was barely bigger than her "I love you too" he said and hugged her firmly to him, never wanting to let go._

I came back to the present with a jolt. Jake was looking at me, his eyes filled with understanding. My vision was slightly foggy. I quickly wiped away the dampness in my eyes with the palm of my hand. Jake gave the hand he was still holding a quick squeeze and let go, walking over to the closet. He opened a few draws and rummaged through them before pulling out a set of clothing. "Here" he said, handing them to me. "These will be huge on you, but they're the best I've got"

"Thank you" I smiled, taking the clothing from him.

"Do you remember where the bathroom is?"

"Yea" I said, mentally walking there.

"I'll let you clean up first. There's soap and towels under the sink"

"Okay, thanks" he leant down and pressed his lips to mine for a brief moment before whispering, "You will always be my very best friend. You know that right?"

I smiled and answered as though from a dream.

"And you will always be my very best friend, Jacob. I love you"

"I love you too," He said. I smiled and kissed him, never wanting to let go.

It took me a while to get all the mud and sand out of my hair but I managed it. After turning off the water I got out of the shower and found a purple towel under the sink. I dried myself off and dressed in the clothes that Jake had leant me. After rubbing the fog from the mirror I couldn't help but smile at what I saw. I was dressed in a pair of Jake's old tracksuit pants. The warm wool was soft on my skin. The fabric gathered at my ankles where it was way too long. I had pulled the strings on the waist as tight as they would go so that they wouldn't slip off my hips. Jake had also given me one of his long sleeved grey cotton shirts. I had needed to roll the sleeves up a few times so that I could make use of my hands, but other than that it was just right. These weren't much different to the sweats I normally wore to bed, but needless to say that it felt great to be wearing Jake's clothes. They even smelled like him. His woodsy aroma would no doubt make sleeping easier. They were extremely comfortable and warm, especially when compared to my now soaked jeans, shirt and jacket that I had been wearing previously. I found a plastic bag in the cleaning cupboard and stuffed them inside. As much as they would smell when I finally washed them I didn't want Billy's house dirtied by my grubby clothes.

When I exited the bathroom I made my way back to Jake's room. The door was closed so I knocked.

"Come in" Jake's voice was muffled behind the wood. I opened the door slightly and stuck my head in. The room was clean. The clothes that had covered the floor were gone and the closet was closed. The papers that had been strewn across Jake's desk were stacked in neat piles. "Just letting you know that the bathroom's free" I said. Jake turned from where he was standing near the bookshelf. He had an old novel in hand and had been looking for a place where it would fit on the overflowing shelves. "Thanks" he said. "I'll be out in a minute. Why don't you make yourself at home in the lounge room?"

"Okay" I said, "see you soon" I closed the door silently and made my way back down the hall and into the lounge room. I seated myself on the two-seat couch and looked around at the tiny room. In the corner there was a tiny television with an aerial much larger than that of the screen. The wood fire was directly across from where I sat. Even though it was unlit it gave the room a homely feeling. I sat there for a few moments, reminiscing all the good times Jake and I had had together, before I had moved away with my mother. Even when we were little we had loved each other. I was pulled out of my thoughts by the sound of someone clearing their throat. It was Billy. "I bet you're feeling better now you're in some warm clothes"

"Sure am, thanks Billy"

"No problem Bella. Listen, I just called Charlie and he said he doesn't want you to drive home in this rain. Something about that truck not being able to take it. I disagreed, that truck's been through more than just a little rain, but nonetheless your father doesn't think it safe. So, he wanted to know if you could stay the night."

"Oh, I wouldn't want to impose" I said

"No, it's fine with me. You can keep Jacob out of my hair for a while. I haven't had time to organize his birthday yet and this seems like the perfect opportunity."

"Oh, okay. Well, thank you Billy. I really appreciate it"

He smiled "No problems honey. You two are good for each other" Billy left, rolling out of the room in his wheelchair. Billy had left me with something else to think about. Jacob's birthday. What on earth was I going to get him?

I only had a moment to ponder this however, as Jacob entered only a few seconds later. His hair was wet from the shower. He wore black tracksuit pants, not dissimilar to the ones he had leant me, and a dark blue cotton long-sleeved shirt. Again, it was almost identical to the one I wore. I giggled. "What?" he asked, coming over to join me on the couch. "We're twins" I said. Jake looked down at his pyjamas, then back to me and chuckled "I guess we are" he said. His eyes moved from my face down my torso, legs and then finally met my eyes again.

"Are you finished checking out the inventory?" I asked

"Well, no actually. I don't think I could ever stop checking out _this _inventory"

I blushed. Jake raised his hand to stroke my cheek. "You have no idea what it feels like to see you wearing my clothes" I could feel my red cheeks turn hotter under his touch.

"Well, they definitely are preferable. Maybe I'll just have to wear them more often"

"I would like that" Jake whispered. He moved his hands to my waist and moved me so that I lay down. He then lay down next to me. It was a tight fit, the two of us on that tiny couch, but it worked. Jake ran his hands through my hair, still damp and tangled from my shower. Since I had no brush here it was going to be in a hell of a mess when it dried. It was comforting to have him so close. After a week without him it wouldn't have been enough to simply see him. I had to be this close, to make sure that he was real.

"Billy said you're staying the night" Jake said quietly, pulling another knot from my troublesome hair. "Yea, Charlie didn't want me driving home in the rain" There was a moment's silence before Jake said, "So, where do you want to sleep?"

My heart stopped. My brain went into overload. _Sleep? _That small word could mean so much. What exactly was Jake asking? "Umm…." I said, putting off my answer.

Jake clarified "I mean would you like to sleep on the spare mattress in my room, or on the sofa." I let out the breath of air I had been holding with relief

"Your room, please. I would prefer to have you near me rather than not" Jake smiled.

"Yes, it is better. I don't know if I could last having you out here. I would probably have pulled the spare mattress out to be able to sleep near you anyway" I ducked my head. Jake kissed my forehead. "It's alright Bells. I don't want to do anything you don't want to do"

"Thank you"

Just then Billy entered the room. "Alright you two, off the couch. Dinner's ready"

"But Dad, couldn't we eat a little later?" Jake whined

"Now boy, I agreed to let Bella stay the night. As far as Charlie is concerned she's sleeping on the couch. If he were to find out anything else from me you would be in deep trouble. Don't push your luck"

I giggled "Maybe we should get up" I whispered, "I don't want to be locked in my room for the next month. I don't know how I'd live without you for that long" Jake played along, shivering at the idea

"Alright Dad, you got me"

"That's what I thought." Billy said, and rolled out of the room.

Jake groaned and stood up, holding out his hand to pull me up after him.

After dinner (which was absolutely fantastic) Billy went to his room, leaving Jake and I to wash up. We finished quickly and returned to Jake's room. Jake pulled out the spare mattress from under his bed and made it with clean linen from the hallway cupboard. After we were all set up I found myself sitting on the spare bed, Jake on his. We had lapsed into silence, neither really sure how to proceed. I decided to start the conversation.

"Jake, I never realised you liked to read" I glanced at the bookshelf next to his bed, overflowing with books.

"Well, it takes my mind off things. You can learn so much from books too. They're a valuable learning tool," I laughed, standing up to walk to the bookshelf.

"You sound like my mum"

"Well it's true" he said, smiling. "I wouldn't know half the things I do now if it weren't for those books" He pointed at the bookcase. I skimmed my finger along the bindings, reading the titles. There were a few I knew from my childhood like _Alice in Wonderland _and _Snugglepot and Cuddlepie. _There were also some of my favourite classics like _Black Beauty, _and even my favourite Shakespearean play _Romeo and Juliet._ Some I didn't recognize. Titles such as _Choices _and _Soul Crossed_ were new to me. I did notice, however, that there were a lot of books written specifically on wolves. _Wolves: Behaviour, ecology and conservation, Wolves: Life in the Pack _and _Of Wolves and Men_ were just a few of the numerous headings.

"So, you're interested in wolves?" It was only an innocent question, but Jake's eyes turned cautious.

"Yea" he said "a bit"

His answer was so blunt that I didn't press any further, but instead walked back over to my bed. I was about to crawl under the sheets when Jake said my name. "Bella". He patted the space next to him.

I paused, not quite sure if I was ready for this. But then I remembered what Jake had said before "I don't want to do anything you don't want to do"

I got up and crawled across his blanket to the space beside him. "Only to sleep" I clarified.

"Yes, only to sleep" He pulled aside the sheets and I slid in, cuddling up to his chest.

"Night Bells" he said, reaching over my head to turn off the lamp

"Night Jake. I love you"

"I love you too". I felt his warm lips press into my hair briefly before I drifted off into a blissful sleep.

_Alright, so that's it for another chapter. What did you think? How about you leave a little pressie for me and review since I've been so nice and worked on this when I'm meant to be studying for the next week of exams? Pretty Please _

_I know that I might have changed a few details from the book, such as Billy not wanting Bella to see Jacob initially because it was dangerous and I wasn't sure if there was a description of Jacob's room in any of the books, but I couldn't find it so I made it suit what I wanted. Oh well, my story, my rules._

_I am slowly but surely making my way to what's coming so I hope you guys have enjoyed the journey so far. If you have any suggestions please feel free to email me. I especially need help with what Bella is going to get Jake for his birthday. I was thinking something simple and homemade. Any ideas?_

_I am hoping to expand on what Jake told Bella before too long, so keep a look out for that ;) After this week I should be able to write a lot more and a lot more often as well which will be awesome. _

_Until our next chapter together,_

_Leeleerose xx_


	10. Beautiful Madness

_First of all I am SO sorry! I really don't have an excuse for not uploading for so long. What's it been, like 3 weeks or something? Anyway, I'm really sorry. I guess I just needed a break, but that is still no excuse. So to make it up to you I'm working faster on the next chapter. It's half done; I just need to iron out a few ideas. _

_The holidays are coming up so I hope to have a lot more writing and thinking time._

_Secondly, my exams are finally over! YAY! *Applause* Thankyou, thankyou _

_I got my results back and I've passed them all, which is terrific news. Now I won't be so stressed. So, the good news for you guys is that I am now free to let my imagination run wild (well, that is until our teachers decide to bury us in homework again)._

_This time I thought I'd give you all a bit of an insight into the mind of Jacob Black. It might help to align the ideas introduced in the last chapter._

_Without further ado I give you the next instalment._

_Thank you, my faithful fanfic readers _

_Leeleerose xx_

_P.S. Sorry, I know I said without further ado but I just want to note that the song __Beautiful Madness__ by the stunning __Delta Goodrem__ is one of my favourites. Even though I have been a fan of her music for years I have only recently discovered this one. If you haven't already heard some of her stuff I recommend that you try it out. You may be surprised. Just search her on Youtube or iTunes. She is really an amazingly talented Aussie :D_

_Okay, I'll stop now and let you get back to J&B _

_NB: I do not own the gorgeous character of Jacob or the fabulous Bella. They are Steph Meyer's alone. But I do own the way that I've used them. Plot ideas have been inspired by parts of the book but all extensions on this are my own._

_Please read and review. Any artist/writer loves feedback (especially the constructive sort!)_

10. Beautiful Madness

JPOV

Sometimes being what I was turned out to be great, but at other times it just sucked. This morning was one of the latter.

I really wasn't ready to wake up from such a good dream, even if it was too good to be true. I didn't want to face reality just yet. Although, come to think of it, with Bella in my arms every thought was like a vision from heaven. Everything I used to dream of was now a part of my life. She had given me her love, her soul and most importantly, her precious heart.

However, it was inevitable that every morning without fail one little noise, amplified by my newly acquired sense of hearing would awaken me to the new day. The tiny chirping bird would welcome every sunrise and there was nothing different about this particular morning.

I groaned quietly wanting nothing more than to be able to go back to sleep and hold onto this moment for as long as possible. Bella stirred slightly in my arms at the noise. Her body was pressed lightly to mine. One of her hands lay palm down on my chest while the other rested next to her head, which was pillowed on my shoulder. My arm had a loose hold around her shoulders, preventing her from rolling away in her sleep. I sighed. There was no way that this moment could get any better. But then again, I had been wrong before.

I didn't have to wait long until Bella mumbled something under her breath. Thinking that she was awake I asked "What was that honey?" She only mumbled again. How was it that I could hear a twittering bird from over a kilometre away but I couldn't understand what this adorable girl was saying as she lay asleep in my arms?

I ducked my head down closer to her and listened carefully. Low and behold she mumbled again, but this time I heard her properly. If my heart could have imploded with the amount of love I was feeling at that moment, I'm sure it would have. Bella, my sleeping angel, was saying my name. She mumbled it softly, over and over, more distinct with each calling. "Jacob, my Jacob". I smiled and planted a small kiss on her head.

Yes, I knew better than anyone else that I belonged to Bella. My heart belonged to her and her alone. I knew that what we had was so much more than just a teenage crush. Every inch of me yearned for her, wanting to devote myself to her. This past week had been painful for us both. Sam hadn't believed me when I'd told him what had happened at Bella's last weekend. Apparently it's rare to have what we do, but I know that it's real. After what we'd experienced how would it not be? All the storied had turned out to be true so far, why not the ones about love as well?

It was a relief to have Bella here. Sam didn't realise that there was a way around his "don't go and see her: rule. _She _had come to see _me_. I knew that Sam would be disappointed. After all, he was only doing this for Bella's safety and I was so selfish that I denied him. I needed Bella here. It was as though we were connected. Something pulled us irresistibly closer ever moment of our lives. Once she left my arms and body only craved to hold her again. Not seeing her for a week had been torture, and I knew from the way that she held me that she felt the same way. There was a need, close to obsession in each of our gazes. Loving as always, but without each other we were lost. A half of a whole. My father had seen this and he believed me. He wanted us to be together so that we would be happy.

But then there was that one thing keeping us apart. I couldn't tell her. It was impossible. What would she think? Would she want to love a…a _monster_? Furthermore, would she still have the choice to pick someone else once I told her the stories? Would she be able to choose to love me, or would she feel compelled to do so, as though it was scripture? It was all too hard. At the present time my want and need for her simply outweighed any of these problems. There would be a time when I would tell her, but not now. For now I would let her sleep.

I closed my eyes and let the numbness wash over me once more as I dwelled in my own happiness.

BPOV

I awoke the next morning to the quiet snores of Jacob. His body moved slightly with each breath. My hand rested on his warm chest while my head lay on his shoulder. I watched the room rise and fall slowly as I moved with his breathing. I focussed on my own breathing, matching it to Jacob's.

He certainly made a great pillow. Although he wasn't soft it was favourable, especially on such a cold morning. I turned slightly, slipping my arms around his torso to pull myself closer. I pressed my freezing toes to the exposed skin near his ankles. Jake shivered slightly in his sleep and rolled over towards me. His upper arm came to rest on my hip. I looked up at his face, memorising his features. He was so peaceful, so different to how he had been only yesterday. What had yesterday meant? He had said that he wanted to tell me something, but couldn't because of Sam. I was worried for him. What was Sam keeping him bound with? Why was it impossible for Jake to tell me?

I reached up, ghosting the shape of his lips, nose and eyes with my finger. I didn't dare to awaken the sleeping Jacob but my hand, hovering over his unguarded face wanted so much to press to his skin. I could feel the heat radiating off him even these few centimetres away. Jacob hadn't always been this warm. Sure, he had always been able to bring the light back into my life, but in the literal sense it hadn't been until quite recently. Actually, come to think of it, that hadn't happened until a few weeks ago, when Jake and I had argued in the forest. Up until that point Jake had been a different.

I thought about this for a while, moving my hand so that I could trace Jake's jaw line, never quite touching his skin, wondering what the connection could possibly mean. All of a sudden there was a jolt. It was as though electricity had run from Jake's skin to mine. Or maybe it was the other way around, I couldn't be sure. There was a sure-fire feeling in me. I needed him. My heart and mind urged me closer. I moved my face up to his, pressing my toes into his legs to gain more leverage. My lips pressed eagerly to Jake's just as his eyes flew open. This caused another jolt, but this time to my heart. I pulled back quickly, surprised by what I had just done.

"Sorry if I woke you" I whispered.

Jake, whose arms were already resting either side of my waist, pulled my cold body closer to his. "That's alright" He whispered back "Recently my life has been better than my dreams anyway".

I smiled. "Is that so? Why would that be I wonder?"

Jake pulled me up so that his lips grazed my ear as he spoke "Guess" He said, as quiet as ever. I shivered involuntarily. Jake chuckled and pressed his warm lips to mine once more.

###

"If I didn't know better Jacob Black, I'd say that you were trying to keep me prisoner here forever."

Jake poked his head out from behind the raised bonnet of his car. It was only this morning that he had asked for my help with fixing the motor of his Rabbit, however, once we had entered the shed he had lifted me bridal style and against all protests had placed me in the front seat of his car. I watched as he fiddled with different parts, some shinier than others. He would pull one out, examine and clean it thoroughly, then refit it before taking out another piece and starting the process again.

"What makes you think that?" Jake asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh, you know" I said, shrugging my shoulders nonchalantly "I was never really good at fixing things, especially not cars." I patted the dashboard awkwardly and continued "And I'm not quite sure how I'm helping by sitting in the front seat of the car watching my boyfriend pull apart the engine and put it back together again." Jake put his hand on the edge of the hood and pulled it down with a snap.

"Is that so?" He asked as he wiped his hands clean with a rag.

"Yep" I crossed my arms defiantly.

Jake made his way around the front of the car to where I was seated. He leant on the doorframe with one arm on either side so that I had no escape. "Well, for your information, you're here so that I don't go insane. Every time I let you out of my sight my mind goes crazy. As for your theory about me keeping you locked up here forever, how do you know that's not my plan?"

"You're not _that_ kind of guy," I said innocently

"What if I _was_ that kind of guy? The type who would draw you in with their irresistible charms and good looks before using you for their own satisfaction" I grinned sheepishly and rolled my eyes at his blatant overconfidence.

"Charlie" I said simply.

Jake looked bemused. "Your father is going to stop me? He trusts me too much. I'm like a son to him. Give me three reasons why I wouldn't be able to keep you here with me."

"One" I said, waving a finger in front of his face "Charlie's the head of police. If I told him I didn't want to stay he'd arrest you for holing someone against their will" Jake's head bobbed side to side in thought. His teeth tugged on his bottom lip until he spoke "Okay, fair enough. What else?" I raised a second finger and waved them both in the air.

"Charlie's my father, and as much as he would prefer to stay out of my love life I have a feeling his fatherly instincts would take over if he thought you were mistreating me. He'd come right over here and force you to give me up." Jake laughed lowly

"Well, I think I have to agree with you on that one. As much as I would argue to keep you here I'm not sure I could stand up against the love a father has for his daughter. That, and I don't particularly fancy being turned into a floor rug any time soon." He let his head drop and shook it in defeat "and thirdly?"

I thought hard. There was nothing else that concerned Charlie and his armed forces, but there was something far more important that I hadn't mentioned. I took Jake's face in my hands and lifted it until he met my eyes. "You love me," I said. His eyes glistened slightly at the words.

"Yes, I do. But isn't that a reason for me to keep you with me forever?" Jacob tilted his head so that it was angled to the side slightly, as a puppy might question its owner.

"Somehow I don't think so," I said. Jake only angled his head to the other side and raised an eyebrow, once again in question.

"Do explain"

"I think that if I really wanted to leave, you'd let me. You couldn't hold me here, not because of anything to do with Charlie, but because you love me. I think you'd let me go if you knew it was best for me." Jake sighed in defeat.

"Alright hun, you win. You're free to go." He pushed himself off the car slightly, leaving the doorway free for me.

"But what if I don't want to go?" I whined, reaching out with one hand to grab the front of his shirt and pull him back to the car. "What if I _want _to stay here forever?" Jake smiled "I thought we were discussing your freedom"

"Yes, but it was all hypothetical and based on the idea that I _wanted _to leave. However, that's not the case at all" I was definitely not ready to leave. My Jacobless week had been nothing but torture. All I wanted now was to spend these last few moments with Jake before my father really did come and drag me off.

I batted my eyelashes a few times, hoping it would work to my advantage. "Can't I stay?" Jake's lips turned up slightly at my question.

"Of course"

"Forever?"

"As long as you want" He leant in, hanging slightly from the doorframe. My right hand was still clasped to his shirt, pulling on the fabric. Jake moved so slowly. In those few moments when out breath mingled between us it seemed as though time itself had halted. The whole world was waiting, just for us. Our scents mixed in the warm air. Woodsy and floral aromas flowed around us. Every moment felt like forever. He gradually came closer, filling my vision until there was nothing but him. Finally his lips met mine and there was that familiar spark that set us on fire. However, sooner than I would have preferred we were interrupted by a loud _**Bang**_.

Bewildered, I jerked back and spun around to face the direction the noise had come from. The shed door was swung wide open allowing the mid-day light to flood the small shed. The sound of tin on tin had definitely been enough to give my heart a stir, so much so that I glared pointedly at the two figures that now stood in the doorway. Both were tall and dark skinned with short cropped black hair. If I didn't know any better I would have said that they were brothers. I turned back to Jake. He seemed annoyed at our interruption. His arms tensed slightly as he pushed angrily off the doorframe and walked around the car to face the two boys. "What are you two doing here?" he asked, his voice low. "You knew I was busy today"

The boys only stood there, gaping. They were both staring at me with their mouths and eyes wide. There was a silence in which both boys turned to look at one another. Their faces were that of awe and surprise. That was until the smaller of the two, Quil, burst into laughter. Soon enough the other boy, Embry followed and they were both half bent, holding their stomachs from the pain caused by their fits of laughter. Jake's fists only tightened in response. Quil looked up to see the potential threat and quickly explained.

"When you said you were busy today we thought you meant with the usual mechanics. We were gonna come and give you a hand. We didn't realise that you were actually _busy_" The two boys broke down again, unable to control themselves.

"Ha Ha" Jake said sarcastically.

I giggled. Jake turned back to me, his face taught as he tried to stop from retaliating. "Bella, you remember Quil and Embry?"

"Of course I do" I said "Hey guys" I jumped out of the Rabbit and walked around to where Jake stood. He was shaking slightly, every muscle tensed. His shoulders were hunched and he stared at the ground with wide eyes.

"Jake" I soothed. He didn't seem to notice me as I took his hand in mine and smoothed it out. There were red marks from where his short nails had cut into the palm of his hand. "Jake" I said again. This time he looked up. The anger disappeared and was immediately replaced by some mix of emotions that I couldn't name. Was it sadness or fear? Relief or worry? Whatever it was, it was gone in an instant.

"Sorry Bells. I guess I was hoping to have you all to myself today, without any interruptions" he threw a dirty look at Quil and Embry who were now glancing around the shed, their eyes fixing on anything but Jake and I.

I smiled. "It's alright, we've got plenty of time" Jake squeezed my hand lightly.

"Sorry guys" He said to Quil and Embry who chanced a look at us once more.

"S'alright" said Quil

"Yea, we know what it's like" Embry backed up.

"So, what have you guys been up to?" I asked, keeping Jake's hand firmly entwined with mine, just in case. Quil shrugged.

"Nothin' really. Just hangin' out around La Push, ya know. It's been pretty dull these last couple of weeks though. Nothing new." Quil's eyes waved to Jake for a moment before he looked back at me.

"What about you?"

"Same old, same old"

It was easy to talk to Quil and Embry. They were as much a part of the Black family as I was. Soon enough Jake decided to bring out some warm sodas from his stash in the shed and we were all sitting there, Jake on a spare car tyre at my feet, me in the front seat of the Rabbit, Quil and Embry on old milk crates directly across from us.

Once Jake got over his annoyance at being interrupted he began to act in his normal manner. The way that he acted around Quil and Embry was similar to how it was when we hung out. He was childish and fun, always joking around. They all got along like peas in a pod, always smiling and taking the mickey out of each other.

I was glad that Jake had chosen to sit where he was. Even though Quil and Embry were old friends that didn't change the fact that the last time I had seen them they had been backing up Sam. As much as I wanted to believe that Sam's little cult was good it was difficult to just throw all that away. Jake's positioning also meant that I needn't feel pressured to speak when awkward silences came about.

Quil and Embry asked a couple of questions about the seriousness of our relationship, but Jake merely said that it was our business and to keep their noses out of it if they wanted to keep them straight. Eventually the topic turned to cars. Jake explained what the problem was with the Rabbit and what he had done to try to fix it so far while Quil and Embry fired suggestions at him for what he could try.

As was inevitable I didn't understand a word of the foreign language. My mind wandered off. Every now and again Jake would bring me back from my deviating thoughts by turning around to smile at me. I would smile back before the boys pulled him back into their conversation.

It was past mid-day by the time they left. Embry waved cheerfully at me as he walked out the door while Quil took it upon himself to give me a bear hug. This only earnt him a slap over the head from Jacob, as he shut the door on the two. Jake waited a few moments, listening with his ear pressed against the tin to make sure that they had left. He walked back to the Rabbit and took a seat in the drivers spot. I stayed where I was, standing in the middle of the shed floor. I watched as he sat with his hands in his lap, his head bowed forwards so that his forehead rested on the smooth steering wheel. "As much as I like Quil and Embry they really can interrupt at the worst of times" I walked over to the car and climbed in so that I was perched on the small section of seat left next to Jacob. I reached out and put my hand on his broad shoulder. He raised his head to look at me.

"It's alright. I don't mind. As I said, we have plenty of time" Jake smiled, taking my hand off his shoulder to hold it in his. He placed it palm up, stroking my hand slowly.

"True" he traced the lines that ran across the centre of my palm. First my life line, then my wealth line, then lastly my love line. My palm tingled at each touch. His fingers moved to the pattern of blue veins that decorated my wrist. They were clearly visible through my pale white skin. He ran his fingers slowly towards my elbow, pausing slightly at the barely discernable pale arcs that stretched across the back of my forearm. The skin here was a degree or two colder than the rest. Even though no ordinary human would have noticed it, I knew that Jake did. He was different, more observant.

My biceps relaxed as he continued and ran a warm thumb over the surface of my arm, up to my shoulder. His fingers danced across my collarbone before his palm came to rest on the curve of my neck. My heart beat so loudly I was sure that Jake could hear it, if not he would have definitely felt my jagged pulse under his palm. I closed my eyes and leant in. "Never again" Jake whispered so quietly that I couldn't be sure that was what he said. For a moment, a split moment I wondered what he was talking about, the unplanned interruption from Quil and Embry, his strange reaction to our visitors, or the small scar on my wrist that served as a daily reminder of what I had been through and what I still had to face. This moment was over in a flash however as Jake reached around me to tug on a lever on the side of the seat. The chair flattened out, throwing us down so that we lay horizontally in Jake's car. I laughed at the turning feeling this had caused my tummy to have. Jake's hand directed my lips to his, and we were back where we had been before, enjoying our own little piece of beautiful madness.

_Righty oh So, how was that? Was it worth the wait?_

_Again, sorry about that. I will try harder to get the next chapter up on time._

_Oooh! And who's excited about July 1st? Eclipse will finally be released and we can get another Jacob fix. Yay!_

_Okay, guess I should get to writing the next chapter. Remember to R&R!_

_Love and best wishes,_

_Lee-leerose xx_


	11. Visualise

_Hey all._

_Finally got the next one up. I can't believe we've reached number eleven so quickly. I can remember writing just the first chapter and hesitantly putting words to paper wondering if anyone would like it. Thankfully you guys have been with me through it all and have helped me place each piece of this puzzle. Thank you. Truthfully, you guys are as much the writers of this story as I am. Without all your support I wouldn't have made it this far, so thank you. To those of you who have been with me since the very beginning, and even those who have recently joined I hope that you have enjoyed the story so far. I promise you that there is still more to come. The plot is simmering away just waiting for me to plate it just right._

_This chapter is a little fluffier than the others. There is not much in the way of plot structure but I thought we could all use a break so that we could relax and just have fun :) I think it's still important for character building and it strengthens the relationship between B&J but I could have possibly left it out. Oh well, I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I did writing it._

_Oh, and the title for this chapter once again comes from an adorable song by the great _Delta Goodrem

_Leeleerose xx_

VISUALISE

I buried my head under my doona. It was the eve of Jake's birthday and I was stuck. Not physically stuck, but mentally. I was lying across my bed, my arms and legs sprawled wide with my head face down. I had no idea what on earth I was going to get Jake, the most important person in my life right now, and I had less than 24 hours to come up with something that expressed just how much he meant to me. Our relationship had surpassed the mere giving of flowers and chocolates. We had started further up the dating chain. I guess you could say that we were intermediates, rather than beginners.

I wanted my gift to show him just how important he was in my life but nothing that I had seen in the shops really expressed that. They were too commercial. Everything had the ulterior reason of money behind it. Nothing was really about the meaning of the product, but instead about how expensive and shiny it was. And as they say, money can't buy love.

I had decided on something homemade. It would be one of a kind and from my heart, but the problem was _what_? I didn't want it to look tacky or overdone, but I did want it to be special. I turned my head to the side so that I could see, searching for inspiration somewhere in my room. Sprawled under my doona on my stomach I couldn't see much. The only helpful object was my bedside table.

On top of this sat my digital alarm clock, small CD player, a bunch of assorted CD's spread across the space and a small picture in a thin silver frame. The picture was one of my favourites. It was of Jake and I when we were little. As always Jake held his favourite wooden truck and looked at the camera with wide, dark brown eyes. He was small, no bigger than the little Bella who stood next to him. Although older, my shoulders barely measured up to Jacob's. I stood next to him, holding my favourite plush doll in my arms. Its head lolled to the side, a grin plastered across its jovial face. My other hand held Jake's. Our tiny hands were interlocked tightly. I was smiling, something that until recently had felt alien to me. My bright pink lips and cheeks stood out against my pale white skin.

Standing next to Jake I looked almost albino. If it hadn't been for my brown eyes I probably could have been. Jake, on the other hand, would be classed as brown, even though I knew that he was only tanned when compared to anyone but me.

The picture had been taken by my mum before my parents had divorced. She had taken us two overly excited kids to the park for a special treat. I could almost recall how abnormally warm it had been that day. It never got very hot around here, but on this particular day the sun had been shining in our favour.

From my tiny stature, the swings and slides had looked so big. Every dip in the slide had sent my petite form through the air. Although this had lasted no more than a fraction of a second I could remember the feeling so well. My stomach had done back flips with excitement. I kept going back for more and more.

Jake was the only one brave enough to try the flying fox. I could remember being too scared to use it. It was huge compared to me and I had thought that I might fall off. Even at that age my co-ordination wasn't that good. It wasn't until Jake suggested that I stand on his shoulders while holding onto the bar that I agreed to give it a try. That way if I fell off he would be able to catch me. After mum had hoisted me up to the handle bar I held on tight and placed my dangling feet on Jake's shoulders. Due to the our miniscule heights my feet only just scraped his shoulders, however knowing that he was there made me feel safe all the same. I had felt so free, as though I was flying. I had been happy that day. I had tried the flying fox and conquered my fears. From then on it had been my favourite thing to do at the park.

Suddenly my mind clicked. I knew what I was going to make for Jake. I threw my doona off and pulled myself over to the edge of my bed, bending over so that I could look underneath it. My hair swung low, nearly touching the floor. Carefully I reached down with my hands, feeling around in the dark space until I found it. I tugged the heavy object and a book box slid out from the darkness. I positioned myself so that I now sat cross-legged on the bed and bent to lift the box from the floor. The items inside rattled slightly as I placed it on the bed beside me. I pulled back the sticky tape that bound the lid closed, making a satisfying ripping noise, and pulled back the cardboard flaps to see what was inside.

It was just as I had packed it all those years ago. At the end of one of those summer visits to Forks back when I was about 12 I had decided that I had had enough of art. Before then I had been quite good, especially at drawing. I loved how simple shapes put together with a little bit of shading could tell a story. They could capture a moment in time, whether it be of a person, plant, animal or even an object. Everything had a story to tell, and it had been my goal to capture these stories through my drawings.

My parents had bought me all new pencils and paper for my 12th birthday. I used to love going down to the creek to draw the pretty trees and fluttering butterflies. However, after about a year of this my parents had started to fight again. I had been so caught up with my family issues that I had lost touch with my inner artist. All inspiration was gone. Somehow the creek no longer seemed a happy place. Everything died. I put away my drawing things and taped the box shut as an extra precaution. That summer, before I left to live permanently with my mum in Arizona, I hid it under my bed with the rest of my forgotten dreams, never expecting to open it again.

I stared into the box. All these forgotten memories had been confined for so long. It seemed a pity that they not be put to good use after all these years. The box, although quite small, held many precious items. On the top was an A4 book of drawing paper. I pried it loose from it's restricted space and opened it to the first page, then the next, captivated by what I saw.

I was faced with images galore. Many sets of eyes stared out at me from the pages, landscapes depicted wild winds or scorching sunlight, tiny beach pebbles lined the shoreline of la Push, and a police car flashed its tell-tale lights. With each turn of a page I revisited a memory. These drawings all meant something special; each and every one. They captured each feeling and emotion of my childhood. Eventually I reached a gap in the pages, as though a bunch had been torn from the binding. I ran my finger down the frayed edge. At the time it had seemed necessary, but in retrospect I wished I could have held back my anger and sadness. Those drawings were of my parents when they had been happy. Together and whole as I would never know them to be again. Those people only existed in my memory, that and those few drawings that I had shredded way back then.

I flicked through the rest of the book. Thankfully there were still a few blank pages left that I would be able to use.

Without the thick drawing pad, the box was relatively empty now. I rummaged through the bottom and scooped out a handful of pencils. I rolled them between my palms, twirling colours and leads of different shades. I put them down before taking out the rest and piling them on top. I opened the top drawer of my bedside table and was lucky enough to find a sharpener among the mess of odd pieces. I started to work, sharpening each pencil back from its death and giving them new life.

It took me ages to revive every pencil. Some were so brittle they kept snapping and I would have to re-sharpen it over and over until either it stayed whole, or I gave up and threw it in the bin. I kept at it, the rhythmic timing of each turn against the blade helped me to think. An image was forming in my mind. I could see, almost as though a vision, a montage of what I was about to do.

Eventually all the pencils were done. I opened the drawing book to a blank page and carefully chose a light lead pencil from the pile. I spun it through my fingers a few times so that it travelled from left to right and back again. It was amazing how familiar it felt to have pencil and paper in hand after all these years.

I started by outlining the shapes. Large ovals and rectangles overlapped, creating the body of the piece. Long smooth curves outlined the forms as they took on the characteristics of human figures. In the lower half of the page there stood two children, a tiny Jake and Bella holding hands. Even on such a warm day they still wore jumpers and tracksuit pants because of the never relenting cold wind. They were smiling broadly, eyes wide and excited. Above them were another two figures standing face-to-face. There was an older, darker Jake facing a taller and curvier Bella. Jake's hair was short, like that in the younger drawing of him, but his muscles had definitely shaped more. Perhaps this was because, like so many times these days, he wasn't wearing a shirt. I finished the light sketch and put the pencil back in the box before selecting a darker lead. I put the pencil to paper and began to trace around the definitive lines I could now see making up my drawing. Once I had outlined I began to shade, filling in the space around the bodies with a grey haze. The two pictures moulded into one.

I put back the pencil and looked at my handiwork. Tiny faces stared out at me from the page. The bodies had been transformed from simple lines to 3D forms. I was proud. This was definitely what I wanted to give Jake. It expressed just how much we had changed physically, yet at the same time, just how much had changed as people.

We used to be so small and young. We loved each other as only Bella and Jacob could. As we grew we were pulled apart by situations beyond our control, then I had fallen for the wrong guy and been hurt deeper than I had ever thought repairable. However, Jake had found me again. He had somehow managed to pull me through the rough and just like in the movies, true love had triumphed.

I put the drawing down carefully and scrambled off the bed. I knew what I wanted, but I wasn't sure where I would find it, or how I would cope when I did. I walked through the house, looking on every wall, hoping against hope that it would be there. Sure enough, there it was laying face down on the shelf above the fireplace in the living room. I walked over to it, shaking slightly from the horror I knew I was about to face.

It was a large Black frame, its shine lost to the sheet of dust that now covered it. I lifted the object from the shelf and carefully dusted it off using the front of my shirt. Pale faces loomed back at me, a reminder of my nightmares. It had been taken at my birthday, in the days leading up to _his_ departure. _His_ arm was wrapped around my waist, pulling me against _his_ cold body. _His_ head was bowed slightly so that I couldn't see _his_ eyes.

My heart wrenched in my chest as the picture pulled on my already tender heartstrings. I was hanging on tender hooks. Any further thought on the matter and I knew I wouldn't last. My vision was already blurred as tears filled my eyes.

I unclipped the backboard and took out the picture, throwing it amongst the coals of the fireplace. I took the shovel from beside the hearth and dug it deep into the coals. I scooped them up, bit by bit and covered the picture until I couldn't see a hint of the object. Tonight, when the logs were burning for warmth, the picture would burn as well, and there would be no trace left behind to suggest it had ever existed.

I turned without deliberation and half ran out of the room. Quickly, I took the stairs two at a time, and didn't stop my unnatural speed until I reached my room.

Shutting the door behind me I leant against the wood and slid to the floor. I pulled my knees to my chest and twisted my hands in my hair, leaning my elbows on my knees. My breathing was constricted as though the air around me was thinner than usual. My head was spinning with what I had just done. I had managed to rid myself of yet another unfriendly reminder of _him_. Only the difference this time was that I had lasted without Jake. It was a small step, I knew, but it showed that I was making progress. I was finally moving on. It took me a moment to clear my mind. I made sure that there wasn't a risk of me falling into the unknown yet again before pulling myself off the floor to walk back to my bed.

I sat cross legged on the soft covers, dusted the remaining grime off the glass and slid my drawing into the back. I secured the board with the clips before holding it up to see the final product. It was perfect, if I did say so myself. There was only one thing left to do.

I went to my wardrobe and found the blue gift bag I had received with one of my previous presents. I pulled off the tag which read my name and slid the frame inside. I placed the bag next to my bed, ensuring that it wouldn't fall over and turned back to my box of art supplies. There were still a couple of sheets of paper left and it was only 4pm. Charlie could be home in around an hour.

I clambered back onto the bed and ripped out a sheet of paper. I took a dark lead and began to write. Putting the pencil to paper seemed to be my way of expressing myself because all those feelings that had been so difficult to describe were plain and simple once I began to write. The letter read

_My Jacob,_

_There is really no way of saying these things to you, but I am going to try my hardest._

_You deserve nothing but the best from me. You __are my everything._

_You were there for me when I was falling apart, just to put me back together._

_I thought I would never run properly again, but you proved me wrong._

_I used to think you couldn't survive death, that it was inevitable. It loomed over your shoulder, waiting for that moment of weakness when it would strike __us down like the frail humans we are. But when I was there, in those moments, believing that I was worthless and that my end had finally come, you took my heart and you mended helped me to believe that the impossible was possible to overcome. You branded my heart your own, winding our heartstrings together until we were so entwined that now I don't think I could ever live without you._

_My heart belongs to you. _

_Whether through rain or shine, day or night, it is yours. Holey and completely, yours._

_People may say I'm crazy, that I'm stupid and young, but I know what we have._

_True love is hard to come by, but now that I know what we have, I would fight to the ends of the earth just to stay with you, because I love you._

_Happy Birthday Jake._

_Love,your Bella xx_

I folded up the paper and slipped it into the gift bag. My clock now read 4:30pm. Charlie would be here in about half an hour. I had just enough time to cook dinner.

It was the following day, Jake's Birthday.

I was driving to Jake's house to pick him up, the blue gift bag safely hidden under my seat. Having already rung ahead of time I knew that Jake would just be finishing his morning tea with Billy, after which they had nothing planned. My truck was puttering along slowly, soaking up the extraordinary sunlight we were receiving today.

Billy had laughed when I had called earlier that morning to ask whether I would be able to steal his son away.

"Sure thing Bella, you can keep him for the day. I'm surprised you didn't ask earlier"

"Thanks Billy" I had replied, relieved that he had taken it so well. After all, Jake's father really did come before me, especially on his birthday.

"No really Bella, it's no problem. In fact I bet he would have sulked around for days if he hadn't seen you on his special day. You've just saved me from a lot of grief"

I had chuckled at that one. I was surprised that Jake would act in such a way. It sounded like something I would do, not Jake. It seemed that we were beginning to rub off on each other.

I reached Jake's house by mid-morning. The sun was shining like never before. I was dressed in my almost new mid-thigh beige shorts and white blouse, thinking that I should at least _try_ to expose my skin to _some_ sun while the moment presented itself. I slid out of the truck and half-skipped to the door of Jake's house. I knocked twice on the thick wood and shoved my hands deep into my pockets.

I wasn't sure how I felt about today. It was a special day for Jake and I. We were going to have the whole afternoon together, just the two of us. This was both exciting and nerve-racking. We had never had a whole day to ourselves. The last time we had tried we had been interrupted by some uninvited guests.

I took a deep breath to calm myself just as the door swung open.

"Got it dad" Jake called over his shoulder. He was standing in the doorway wearing his usual denim shorts that cut off just above the knees and a dark coal shirt. It hugged his body lightly, meaning that it could show off his abs without him even trying. He turned to the open door and a look of surprise crossed his face "Bella…" he said quietly "Bella!" Suddenly Jake was holding me, his arms seizing me tightly. I giggled as he lifted me off the ground to spin me around in a tight circle. Reflexively, I pulled my hands out of my back pockets and threw them around his neck, hanging on for dear life. My legs flew through the air and I giggled louder. "Jake!" I exclaimed as my head began to spin. Jake stopped and put me down, his arms never leaving me. "Hey" I said happily, "Happy Birthday!"

Jake laughed, excitement getting the better of him. I stood up on my tip-toes to reach his lips which obligingly leant down to meet mine. We were both standing there, giddy in each others presence. My arms were still wrapped tightly around his neck while his held me securely to his chest.

"How did you get here?" He asked, looking straight into my eyes.

"Um…I can drive myself places every now and again Jake. My truck hasn't died on me just yet"

Jake laughed again "No, that's not what I meant. I was actually wondering how you got the old man to let you come over. I thought I was bound to a day of father-son bonding" Jake made a face and I couldn't help but laugh quietly.

"Don't push it son" a voice came from behind Jake. Billy rolled into view. He smiled at the sight of us, standing in the doorway, obviously completely lost in each other.

"Bella rang this morning and I decided to let you have some freedom today. After all," he said, winking at me "she is your better half"

"She sure is" Jake said, pulling me closer to him.

"But I hope you realise that those father-son moments are some of the best memories you'll ever have."

"Yea dad" Jake answered "But Bella-Jacob moments are a close second"

Billy nodded slowly "Fair enough son, just as long as I'm first" He teased, waving a finger pointedly at us.

"You sure are dad" Billy smiled and raised an eyebrow at his son.

He took a moment before saying "Stop pulling my leg son, I know how much she means to you"

"Bu.." Jake tried to interrupt

"…But nothing." Billy said, refusing Jake's disruption "Now, get out of her. Quick, go!" Billy waved his hands forwards, gesturing for us to move out of the doorway, still smiling insanely.

"Enjoy yourselves," He said as we turned our backs. "Oh, and Jake?"

"Yep" Jake said, turning to face his dad, me still connected to his side

"How about we keep those "Bella-Jacob moments" at a PG rating?" I chuckled to myself as Jake turned us away from the house, shaking his head in embarrassment.

Once we got close to the truck I ran ahead to grab the bandanna I had in the front seat. Jake jogged up behind me, pulling me back against his chest. "What _are_ you doing?" He asked, breathing into my ear. I turned in his arms and held the bandanna at his eye level. It swung there for a few moments between my fingers before Jake took a hand off my waist to take the piece of material from my hand.

"What's this?" He asked "Don't you like my hairstyle or something? If it's a problem I can by a hat, cut it or something. But no offense Bella, I really don't like the bandanna look"

I laughed, again. Wow, I really was doing an awful lot of that today.

"It's not for you're hair silly" I said, taking the bandanna back "It's to cover your eyes. I don't want you to see where we're going"

"Oh" Jake mouthed, realisation dawning on him "Well, in that case, go ahead"

I reached up, taking the material over his eyes and around the back of his head. I pushed up on my toes to tie a knot in the back, causing my uncoordinated self to become unbalanced and slip forwards suddenly. I crashed into Jacob's chest with a huff. His arms constricted and pulled me against him. I leant up and pressed my lips against his. Jake responded passionately, tugging on the base of my shirt. I pulled away, knowing that more-likely than not, Billy was still watching from somewhere behind the window's curtains. "Thankyou, Jake" I whispered, giving him a last peck on the cheek before pulling away to take his hand.

"Really Bells, if you want to spend the day doing _that _I don't have a problem, none at all. In fact I'll wear the bandanna all day if I have to"

I sighed "Come on" and I tugged him to the truck.

I pulled up in front of the small park. The sun shone brightly, sparkling off the overgrown grass which was still covered in the morning's dew.

"We're here" I announced as the truck came to a stop.

"Finally" said Jake. He had his hands laced together in his lap, twiddling his thumbs in a nervous manner. I opened my door and hopped out, walking around to open the passenger side. I took Jake's hands and guided him so that he was standing on the hard ground.

"Can't I look?" He pleaded, moving a hand as though to remove the bandanna.

"No" I said quickly, taking his hand away at once "Not yet"

Jake moaned but complied. I tugged on his hands lightly, pulling him forwards until we reached the soft grass. Everything was overgrown here, a forgotten place. Nobody came here anymore. They had more important places like the Skate Park or Seattle shopping centre. No one really cared about the little park.

I dropped Jake's hands and moved behind him, reaching up to untie the bandanna. I pulled it off with a flourish and Jake blinked a few times as his eyes adjusted to the bright light. Slowly, his eyes widened as he realised where we were.

"Bella…" He said in disbelief, but he didn't continue. He only walked forwards, taking it all in. I stood behind him, watching his awe as it took over.

He looked around the small area, the slide stood tall with its paint tarnished and worn from the years. It wasn't as big as it used to be. Then there were the swings, again a lot smaller than from memory, and finally the flying fox. A grin flashed across Jake's face as he turned back to me. "Happy Birthday" I said simply.

Jake ran forwards and threw himself upon me. His arms lifted me up into a tight bear hug, squeezing the air out of me. It wasn't until I said his name "Jake, um, I can't breathe" that it put me down. My breathing came quickly now, breathless as I was. "Thankyou" He said honestly. "This is just the best" Jake's beam was contagious. I found myself grinning from ear to ear as he led me to the flying fox.

Jake stepped up onto the platform and I followed. He held onto the bar, turned to wink at me and swung back before lifting his feet off the ground. Jake flew through the air, his legs pulled up beneath him so that they didn't touch the ground. I giggled when he reached the other side and pushed off the platform with his feet to come flying back again.

He stopped the movement, placing his feet on the metal platform that we now both stood on "Come on Bells" He said "hop on"

I did as he asked and puts my arms around his neck before pulling myself up so that I could wrap my legs securely around his waist. Jake glanced back at me "Ready?" He asked

"Yep" I adjusted myself so that I could see over his shoulder "Ready"

"Hold on" He said as he pushed off.

We were flying through the air. The wind whistled in my ears as it passed at a speed I didn't believe possible. My stomach turned as Jake pushed off again to send us flying backwards. However, this time we didn't quite make the distance, stopping somewhere in the middle. I was confused.

"What are you doing Jake?"

"Um, it seems that we've stopped moving"

"I can see that Jake"

"Oh, right" I laughed.

Jake began swinging his body backwards and forwards, me on his back. My head spun. This felt strange, alien. I wasn't sure if I like the way his body was moving against mine, or maybe that was my body moving against his. My legs were still Either way I couldn't help it, and I didn't think it was appropriate for this point in time.

"Jake" I said cautiously "Can you stop?"

His body came to a standstill, hanging from the bar. "Did I hurt you?" He asked, concerned.

"No, no. I'm just feeling a little ill, that's all" I lied, too embarrassed to tell the truth.

"Oh, okay" He said.

There was a moment's pause before Jake spoke again

"Hold onto the Bar Bella" I took an arm carefully from around his neck, my other moving to his shoulder to push up so that I could hold onto the bar. Jake lifted one hand off to allow me to get a better grip. We were both hanging by one hand, connected only by my legs that were still wound tightly around his waist.

"Now, Bella" He said "I'm going to let go of the bar and you're going to let go of my waist and reach up with your other hand to hold on to the bar as tightly as you can, okay?" I nodded. Jake dropped. I let go of him, my legs dangling limply beneath me and swung my other arm up to hold onto the bar. I looked down to see that Jake had landed on the sandy ground below, miraculously still standing. I knew if I tried such a feat I would have ended up on my butt.

"Are you alright?" He asked

"Yep" I said quickly looking down from between my arms. Jake walked over so that he stood in front of me. At his height the top of his head came up to my belly button. He turned and grabbed my legs with his hands, moving them so that they dangled over his shoulders. "Okay Bella" he said "You can let go now"

I took a deep breath and let my hands slip from the bar. I let out a small yelp as my stomach turned in on itself as I fell through the air. Suddenly I was on Jake's shoulders, his hands holding my legs over his shoulders so that I didn't tip off. I put my hands in his hair to make sure I wouldn't.

Jake walked me back to the truck, me on his shoulders like a child. When he reached the truck he opened the door and turned, bending his knees so that I could slip off his shoulders, into the passenger seat. Jake turned to me, a smile on his face. "Was that fun?"

"So much" I said, sounding exactly like my 9 year old self.

"Again, thank you for bringing me here Bella. I had almost forgotten how much fun it was to be a little kid"

"No problem" I said and then I remembered "Oh, there's something else"

"Something else?" He said as I turned in the seat to reach over to the driver's side "What more could you give me?"

I laughed. "You deserve so much more Jake, I only wish I could give you the world, but unfortunately that's a little difficult to gift wrap" I heard Jake laugh behind me as I scooped out the gift bag from its hiding spot and turned back around to face him. "Here you go" I said, now nervous as to what his reaction would be.

Jake took the gift bag from my trembling fingers and gave me a curious look before opening it. He reached inside and pulled out the card and frame. Jake read the card first, a smile forming on his face. He then turned over the frame as his eyes widened.

There was my picture, laid out for him to see.

"It's beautiful" said Jake, his voice shaking slightly with emotion.

"Really?" I asked, reaching out to touch his hand tentatively.

"Really" he confirmed, smiling. Jake leant forwards to meet my lips and kissed me sweetly before pulling away to look at the drawing yet again.

"That part there" he said, pointing "That's my favourite part"

His finger traced my face, smiling sweetly from the page. "I disagree" I said softly, reaching out to circle an area on the glass "This is my favourite part" It was Jake's face, his eyes glistening with love and devotion. Jake sighed and placed the gift along with the bag and card on the dashboard of the car. "Each to their own I guess" He whispered. He moved forwards to where I was seated, so close now that I could feel the heat rising off his body. I closed the space between us, bringing his lips gently to mine.

"Definitely the best birthday ever" Jake mumbled against my lips. I murmured in agreement, while moving my hands to his hair to silence him once more.

_There we are, another chapter finished!_

_Haha, how funny was that line from Billy, just quietly. _"How about we keep those "Bella-Jacob moments" at a PG rating?" _Sorry, I couldn't resist ;)_

_So if you liked it, loved it, hated it, let me know. As you know I love my reviews. They really do help to keep me motivated. One week of holidays left!_

_The next chapter is coming. I promise I will try to have it finished sooner rather than later. Oh and if any of you are interested in seeing my interpretation of Bella's art please let me know and I'll put it on my Profile for you to see. I'm a little shy at showing people my work. Sharing my writing with you all was a big step for me, so to share my drawing with you I think I'll need at least 5 people saying they want to see it _

_Thankyou my lovelies,_

_Best wishes,_

_Lee-leerose xx_


	12. Behind these Hazel Eyes

_**NB: I do not own these characters. They are the property of Stephanie Meyer. Thanks **___

**BEHIND THESE HAZEL EYES**

**BPOV**

The Monday after Jake's birthday was extremely slow. School was boring, as always, and after spending so much time with Jake I almost felt alone.

I sat at the small table in the school's cafeteria, surrounded by my old friends. Angela sat next to me, her head resting on Eric's shoulder. Eric had a chair pulled up next to her, a hand on her knee. Mike was on the other side of me, his blue eyes always trying to catch mine. A disapproving Jessica sat next to him, curling a strand of her brown hair around her finger. I sat in the middle of it all, not listening to whatever it was that Eric was saying about who would win in a fight: Catwoman or Spiderman.

Even after returning to sit with my old friends I couldn't help but feel left out. It was as though I didn't quite belong. The things that they thought mattered so much, like movies, fashion and celebrities didn't really take my fancy.

I had always been different from other people. Never on the inside, but always skirting the limits, dipping my toes into normality every now and again, but in essence I wasn't normal, I was anything but.

I knew there were more important things to life. Like the truth for instance. I knew that the supernatural existed. I knew that there were such things as Vampires and that their bite could kill you. I had experienced this first hand of course. Worse than that was knowing that true love really did exist, and it could be torn from you leaving you bare and screaming in pain. I had been trapped in a world that they could only dream of, and then pulled from it, thrown into a nightmare.

In a way, it seemed as though I had simply been through too much without them. There was no way that they could understand me now. Not now that I had changed so much. There was only one person who could truly understand me, and that person was Jake.

Unfortunately, Jake had dropped out of school to look after his dad. And even if he hadn't he would have still gone to school on the reservation.

So, now I was stuck at school, waiting for the next time I could see my missing half.

I leant forwards onto the table, folding my arms and hiding my face in them as though I were about to play a game of "heads down, thumbs up".

I lay there for a while, letting my hearing zone in on different conversations. The table to the right of us was having a good old chat about their history report which was apparently due next period. I moved onto the next table who were talking about a party they had planned for the weekend; who was going, what they were wearing, and all the important things of course. I rolled my eyes and zoned in on the table to my left. Here they were talking about sport. Apparently there was a huge basketball fixture on this afternoon which was labelled 'win, or die'.

I was pulled out of my eavesdropping by a vibration coming from my back pocket. I slowly sat up and pulled out my phone. There was one new message.

I opened the text and saw that it was from Jacob.

_Good afternoon honey. How's school? ~J_

I smiled. I could see my day improving already.

I typed back quickly.

_Boring. Wish you were here ~ B_

I pressed send and waited. Soon enough there was another vibration, alerting me to his reply.

_Me too. It's boring at the res without you. Dad won't stop talking about how nice you were to me on my birthday ~J_

_Haha. Well as I said, it was nothing. I enjoyed it as much as you did ~B_

_I'm glad. Nothing's worth it if you're not happy. It's my reason for existence ~J_

It took me a moment to work out how to respond to that one.

_And you are my reason for living. How I wish I could see you. ~B _

_Where are you now? ~J_

_Lunch. Cafeteria ~B_

_Meet me outside in 10? ~J_

_Absolutely :) xx ~B_

_Awesome. Pack your bags hun. See you in a few :) xx ~J_

I slipped my phone back into my pocket, attempting to hide my happiness. I stood up slowly, taking my food tray with me and made my way over to the bin. No one at my table seemed to notice that I'd left. Actually, no one seemed to care.

I dumped my scraps and put my tray on the pile. With a glance over my shoulder I saw Mike looking around the room, his face thoroughly confused, as though he'd just misplaced something of great importance. I walked quickly out of the cafeteria and out of sight.

###

I stood in the car park waiting for Jake. I had decided that I wasn't going to do any homework and therefore I didn't need any books.

It wasn't long before I could hear the loud roar of the motorbike as he sped into the school grounds. The bike slowed as he reached the spot where I was standing before coming to a stop just in front of me, reaching up to pull his helmet off.

"I heard there was a certain damsel in distress who needed my help" He spoke loudly so as to hear himself over the purr of the engine.

"That would be me" I said, walking up to the bike and throwing a leg over the seat so that I was seated behind him.

"Happy to be of service my lady" He answered "But I did hope that you would wear this" He said over his shoulder, passing me his helmet "Please" He finished.

"As you wish" I said into his ear, giving him a quick peck on the cheek "After all, you did save me from a slow and painful death" I shoved the helmet on my head and gave Jake the thumbs up before wrapping my arms securely around his waist.

Jake kicked the bike into gear and pulled out of the car park and onto the main road. The wind swept over us as the bike propelled us forwards. Even with the helmet on I could feel the cold wind as it permeated my thin cardigan. I tucked my head in close to Jacob's body, holding on tightly to avoid drag.

It was beautiful, watching the world go by like this. Everything was mixed, as though the colours on the paint palette had been smudged together before God painted the world. The greens of the trees and moss were one large blob of colour, streaks of light running through as the sun shone through the spaces.

Before long we had reached Jake's house. Jake rode all the way to the shed where he finally stopped. I slid off the back, pulling the helmet off to allow myself fresh air. Jake kicked out the stand and dismounted gracefully.

He came over to me and took the helmet out of my hands "Thankyou for wearing it" he said as he walked me to the shed. "You mean too much to me. I couldn't live with myself if something happened to you, especially if that something happened while I was riding the bike with you on the back."

I didn't respond, I only took his hand which wasn't holding the helmet, in mine.

We reached the shed and I sat in my usual seat in the front of Jake's Rabbit as he pottered around the shed, sorting out bits and pieces as we talked.

As was inevitable, there was a knock on the shed door. Jake got up and went to get it. Outside stood Quil and Embry, grinning from ear to ear.

I laughed at their timing while Jake groaned in defeat. "Am I ever going to be able to spend quality time with Bella?" He asked gruffly.

"Not while we're alive" Quil said in a sing-song voice as he strolled into the shed, Embry at his side.

"So true" Said Jake "Oh well, I'd better go get us some drinks then"

Jake left, shutting the tin door behind him.

Quil and Embry took their well-used milk crates and set them down across from where I sat. Sitting down, they grinned at me childishly.

"How are you guys?" I started

"Good" They answered simultaneously.

"What about you?" Quil asked.

I thought about it. I was definitely better now that I was with Jake. "Awesome" I answered finally.

Almost at the same time their eyes widened and they looked back at one another before looking back at me; their eyes still wide and disbelieving.

"What?" I asked, feeling a little awkward.

"Nothing" Said Quil, composing himself.

I raised an eyebrow in disbelief, something I had learnt from Jacob.

"Alright, alright" sighed Embry. "We were wondering how serious you and Jacob are."

"After all" Quil jumped in "This is the second time we've seen you two in here together, and it's not like we visit Jake's shed that often"

Wishing that Jake would hurry back I answered truthfully. "I love Jake, with my whole heart, so I guess you could say that this is pretty serious"

Quil and Embry exchanged a look

"But, you know, sometimes love can be misleading" said Quil

"Yeah" continued Embry "Like that Cullen kid. What was his name Quil?"

My heart stopped. My gaze locked on the air above Embry's head as I braced myself for Quil's answer.

"Edward" he said simply.

Any preparation I had made in those few short seconds was thrown away at the mention of his name. My heart tore causing my chest to heave in pain. I clutched my arms around myself, willing myself to just stay together. My palms began to sweat and my eyes began to water.

"You seemed to be getting pretty serious with him. You probably called that love too" Embry continued.

The hole in my chest burst open. The stitches that Jake had taken months to heal me with disintegrated in the time it took for those few words to process. Emptiness swallowed me as his name swarmed my mind.

I looked up, my vision hazy as I fought back what I had tried so hard to forget. The casual way in which they spoke about him burned. I fought to control myself, only hoping that I could hold onto reality long enough for Jake to save me.

Quil and Embry stopped speaking. They seemed to notice the change. I was slumped in my seat, clutching my chest as I struggled to breathe. I needed Jake.

"Umm..."Quil said. "Ummmmm..." He was getting nervous now. Embry decided to try to help.

"But you really do love Jake. I mean, from what we've heard this is the best thing that's ever happened to him."

The hole stopped tearing, but the pain remained.

Quil caught on "Not to mention all the good times you've had together like that time he lowered the front seat of the car after we left. Hey?" He winked suggestively.

If it were possible for my heart to ache any more, it would have. These words, instead of helping me caused the hole to rip further until I was sure that I was split in two. I couldn't believe that Jake had told them about something so personal. No, it couldn't be him. They must have stayed listening at the door.

"Or the cottage make-out session" added Embry

"Or even that first night" continued Quil "when he stopped you from screaming in your sleep and you told him that you loved him"

My whole body ached with hurt and shame. I was confused. These were all highly personal things, things that I wouldn't have dared to share with another human being. Yet Jacob had shared them, all of them. These special moments that were meant just for us had been tarnished. Their meaning was gone. I felt robbed and used. Jacob had gone and told Embry and Quil about that night. That first night when he had found me, vulnerable as I was and had helped me break away. I thought these moments were special to him. That they belonged to us and us alone, but apparently this was not the case.

I stood, my ears ringing as blood rushed through my body. My head swam causing me to stumble slightly as I made my way to the door.

"Bella?" Embry called, but I didn't listen. I quickened my pace.

"Bella!" This time he called louder, more urgently. I began to run, pushing the tin door out of my way as I burst outside.

I could here footsteps come to a stop in front on me so I looked up, tears streaming down my face to see Jake walking back to the shed. He had a brown paper bag clutched in each hand and a look of shock masked his features as his eyes came to focus on me.

I turned in the direction of the bike and ran.

**JPOV**

I hadn't even been gone for 5 minutes when on the way back from the house I saw Bella burst out of the shed door. Hearing me coming she looked up and what I saw broke my heart. She had tears running down her cheeks; her eyes were red and puffy. Before I could ask her what had happened she turned and ran in the direction of the bike.

I dropped the bags of soda I was holding and followed her. I was within two meters of her when she threw herself onto the bike and slammed down the gas, then proceeded to push the hunk of metal to its limits, tearing off down the road.

I stared after her, confused and angry. I immediately turned and marched into the shed. My face was red hot and my body was shaking worse than ever. Embry and Quil recoiled at my entrance, but I didn't care. They had hurt Bella, my Bella.

###

I stood at the base of the tree outside Bella's window knowing what it was that awaited me. An upset Bella, confused and angry.

I didn't blame her. I mean, I would be angry if it was me, but I only hoped that she could find a way to forgive me.

All these months, these last few weeks I had been trying to fix her, to help her get over that bloodsucker and suddenly, all my work, all _our_ progress had been flushed away.

I took a few steps back so that I could see her window. It was closed. I bent down to pick up a small rock and tossed it at the glass. It hit the window with a small *clink* but there was no answer. I tried again with a different rock but the outcome was the same, no answer.

I sighed inwardly; knowing that I was going to get into trouble for entering her room without permission, but then again knowing that I needed to explain trumped this.

I took a small run up and jumped up onto the tree, grabbing onto the lowest hanging branch. From there I leapt to the house and pushed off with my feet so that I moved back to the tree to grab onto another branch higher up.

I was level with Bella's window now. The sun was setting causing the window to reflect the sun's rays. As hard as I tried I couldn't see past the reflection. Deciding to take the chance I leapt forwards to the window and grasped the top of the frame with my hands and gripped the bottom pane with my feet. I was crouched, my knees pulled up to my chest as I tried to look in the window.

At this distance I could finally see into Bella's room. It was a mess. Everything was strewn across her floor, glass smashed on her bedside table, CD's tossed out of their covers and books left open with pages torn out. Her bookshelf had been shoved against the door to keep anyone from opening it. She was barricaded in her own room.

I saw her, an image of a distressed angel, tossed down from heaven. Bella was lying asleep on her bed, her head buried in her pillow. Her body lay to the side with her legs pulled up into the foetal position. Her arms pulled her legs tightly to her chest to protect her from something I couldn't see. Her hair fanned out behind her head, glistening beautifully as rays from the setting sun shone upon her face.

I couldn't wait any longer. I took one hand off the top of the window and reached down to tug on the bottom of the glass pane. I dug my nails under the wood, pulling with all my might. My fingers were red raw, but I kept tugging the pane up and up until there was a gap of a few centimetres. I shoved my whole hand under and lifted forcefully, sending it flying upwards.

I leapt into Bella's room, landing softly on the wooden floorboards. I closed the window and turned to her.

Walking to her I saw what she had done. There were photos, all picturing me and her, torn into pieces. They lay at my feet in a mess. I walked through CD's, clothes and books before I finally made it to her bed. She really had gone to town with this.

I could hear her soft breathing as she slept, interrupted by a faint whimper every now and again. I knelt down next to where her head rested. Her cheeks were still wet with tears, her eyelashes banded together. I suppressed the sob that welled in my chest. What had they done to her? They had sent her back to hell, my angel, my princess.

Bella stirred in her sleep. She moaned, her breathing quickening. "No" she gasped for air "No!" Bella jerked slightly, her body shaking. Her arms pulled her legs tighter to her chest as she fought against whatever bound her to her nightmare. "Jake" she cried, a tear escaping to run down her cheek "No". I shook violently. What had I done? She was saying no to me.

A strand of hair had come to fall over Bella's face. I reached out and carefully put it back behind her ear. "Jake" she gasped again, just as my hand touched her skin lightly. She began to shake "No" I pulled away "Jake".

I stood up and took her sheets which were thrown over the base of the bed. I straightened them out and pulled the soft material up and over her shaking body. I pulled the doona up as well, tucking it in around her. "Jacob" she whispered quietly, her shaking coming to a slow "my Jacob. No. Help. Please"

I stopped as realisation dawned on me. She wasn't saying no to me, she needed me to stop the pain. I placed my hand on her face, cupping her cheek. Bella began to cry in her sleep, the tears wetting my hand.

"Bella" I said, watching as her face moved. Her eyes tightened as her body jolted. Something was frightening her. It wouldn't let her out. "Bella" I said again, hoping it would do some good "Bella, please, come back" Bella's body heaved as her tears became heavier. Her mouth opened wide in terror. "No!" She shrieked in pain "No!"

I couldn't take this. I needed to do something.

I stood and walked to the other side of the bed, pulling back the covers. I slid in beside her, pulling her frail body to me. Her arms still cradled her legs to her chest as her body shook. She was so small, fragile even. Her pale skin stood out from mine as I wrapped my arms around her chest. Her stuttering cries waned, turning to small whimpers of pain. "Bella" I said again "I need you. Please come back"

The shaking slowed as I held her to me. Her breathing evened out becoming slow and deep. I matched mine to hers so that our chests rose and fell in the same rhythmic motion. Before long Bella spoke again, her voice small and sweet.

"Jake?" It wasn't like before. This was not a statement of her need, it was her asking if I was really there. Her eyes fluttered open, fighting against sleep.

"Shhh" I whispered into her ear "You're okay. I'm here. I'm sorry"

Bella unlocked her knees from her hands and used her elbow to turn over. My arms stayed where they were, holding her tiny body to me. She squeezed her eyes shut before forcing them open. She looked at me, vulnerable and open, just like that first night.

"Why?" She asked quietly "Why did you tell them?"

I looked at her. I mean, I really looked at her, straight through her flesh and bone and into her heart and soul. She was hurt, broken and desperate, holding onto me for dear life.

Dear God, what had I done?

Bella's eyes were moist, glistening as the tears she held back threatened to overpower her.

"Bella, I am so sorry" I said, kissing her temple softly "I had no idea they were going to say those things. I had no idea they would bring the bad memories back"

Bella sniffed quietly. "No" she said. "I can handle _him_ with you here. But why did you tell them about _us_? All those personal things..." she was at a loss for words. Her mouth opened and closed as she searched for something to say "Don't they mean anything to you?"

I stared down at her. This girl was stuck in turmoil. On one hand she couldn't face the past alone for fear of falling into a black abyss, but on the other hand the only person who could help her from succumbing to the nightmares had betrayed her trust and told his friends things about their personal relationship.

"Bella" I whispered, knowing my secret was killing us both. "They mean the world to me. You have no idea how much you mean to me. But I can't keep any secrets from them. The others know everything. It's a part of the whole 'cult' thing. No matter how hard I may try I can't keep anything from them"

Bella buried her face into my chest. I moved my hand up to the back of her head, cradling her to me.

"But those things mean so much to me" she mumbled into my skin.

"Me too" I sighed into her hair "me too"

"I told you everything, Jake I opened up and let you in. You made me feel as though everything was alright for once in my life. I haven't hurt for a long time because of you. I want to trust you, but I'm not sure if I can anymore"

"Please Bella. I will make this better"

"How?"

My mind whirled. How could I explain without going against Sam's orders?

"I will find a way to let you in. You will know everything Bella." I promised her "I will make Sam see sense."

Bella nodded slowly "Soon. Please"

I agreed "Yes, as soon as possible" I leant down And brushed my lips against hers. They were wet and tasted of salty tears. "Soon" I promised and kissed her once.

She just lay there, not moving, not reacting. She only smiled slightly and wrapped her own arms around me, holding herself together.

_Ta da! Firstly a huge thankyou to all my reviewers from the last chapter. A special mention for PickingDaisies who read the whole story and reviewed every chapter! That's what I like to see. It helps to see comments as the story progresses :)_

_As I think you may have realised by now I'm not going to refer directly to Jake being a you-know-what before Bella finds out. Somehow I think it will be better if the first time it is mentioned is when our main girl finds out._

_So, what did you think? Wouldn't you be pretty pissed off if your bf was telling his friends everything about your relationship? I reckon I would. There are some things that should be kept personal._

_Also, I wanted to get your guy's opinion on the rating for this fic. Should I up it, or keep it as is? Please let me know as I would hate for it to be in the wrong category and get a complaint about it :s_

_Thankyou to the people who wanted to see my artwork. Unfortunately there were only two of you so I won't be putting it up unless I get 5 requests. Sorry, but I need to stick to what I say._

_Lastly, my reviewer who wanted Jacob to herself (you know who you are) I'm afraid taking Jake out of my story to be with you would leave just Bella and I think that would be a little boring :) so sorry, I'm afraid I can't give you Jake. Trust me, if it was possible to have him I would have had him a long time ago :p_

_T__hankyou my pretties,_

_U__ntil our next chapter together,_

_lee-leerose xx _


	13. Why Not?

_G'day. How's it going?_

_OMG! I saw Eclipse the other day. Best one yet I'd say. Loved Jacob in it of course :) and here's a note for Edward...when you have a body like that, you don't need a shirt! Will make sense if you've seen it, if not I suggest you do...go...now! Hurry :)_

_Oh, and I don't know if Jake's "old school", do you? Lol again, see the movie._

_Seriously, you won't be disappointed._

_Now, here's the next chapter. I've had a few people asking me why it is that Sam doesn't want Jacob to be with Bella. Here's where we find out._

_Enjoy_

_lee-leerose xx_

_P.S This title is a song by Hilary Duff. Came across it on my iTunes and thought, actually, Why not? Haha :p_

_NB: I do not own the characters, they are Stephanie Meyer's, but the plot is mine alone _

**WHY NOT****?**

**JPOV**

I left Bella's house the first thing in the morning. As much as I wanted to work this out with Sam I couldn't leave Bella alone for the night. She had far too much looming over her for me not to stay with her when she was at her most vulnerable.

The night had not been peaceful. Bella had awoken numerous times, screaming as the nightmares took her away from me. Her chest would heave in pain as she screamed my name, asking for my help. When it was over her tired body would lapse into sleep once again, the nightmares always returning. I had stayed by her side all through the night, whispering sweet nothings into her ear. When her breathing began to accelerate and her body tensed with pain I held her to my chest, calling her back to me until her whimpering ceased and the cycle of peaceful dreams to terrible nightmares began again.

The sun rose, shining through the tiny window. Bella was safe during the day. I knew the bad dreams wouldn't hurt her when it was light. I untangled her arms from around my waist and heaved myself off the small bed, tiptoeing through the mess that covered her floor. I lifted the bookcase that barricaded the door with ease and placed it back where it belonged. I then cleared a path through the mess for Bella so that she wouldn't trip and hurt herself when she finally woke up.

On the back of a piece of a torn picture I wrote a note and left it where my head had been pillowed beside her.

_Good morning my angel._

_I'm sorry I couldn't be here to see you when you woke up. I've gone to sort everything out. _

_I'll be back soon. _

_I love you. _

_Jake xx_

I left Bella's room as carefully as possible, making sure not to make any noise as I took the stairs, one at a time. I reached the front door and opened and closed it without a sound before turning to run into the forest.

###

I reached Sam's house by 7:30am. His place had seemed like a second home for the last few months. He had always been so understanding about coping with what I was. Considering he had been through it all before I trusted him to help me through this. He had made the initial transition easier and tried to keep my life as similar to its old one as possible. But there was one thing from my old life that Sam didn't agree on, and that was my relationship with Bella.

I understood why Sam didn't want me to be with Bella. He knew just how dangerous our kind were. If at any given moment we forgot ourselves we could lose of control. He had learnt this first hand when he'd lost control all those years ago. Emily, his one true love, his imprint, had been standing too close. She had the marks to prove it.

I knew how dangerous it was for me to be near Bella. But there was something about her. We were like magnets, playing off one another's movements. I had known since that day in the kitchen when we had kissed that this was more than just a teenage crush. Bella was my imprint.

Imprinting had always been as much of a myth to us as we were to the humans. It popped up in the stories of our ancestors, yet we had never really come across it until recently. Years ago Sam thought he was in love. A girl called Leah was his love and light. He thought she was the one. His one true love. But then he met Emily and everything changed.

Where the earth's gravity had once held him in this world, now it was Emily. Everything in his life revolved around her. She was the centre of his universe, his imprint.

Sam had never really gotten over hurting Leah. She had been so in love with him and he had ditched her, for no less than her own cousin.

You couldn't blame Sam though. There was no way to know whether or not you were going to imprint on someone, or even who that someone might be. All we knew was that imprinting was extremely rare. Only one person in every pack imprints, or at least that's what the stories tell us.

This was another reason why Sam didn't think I should be with Bella. He didn't believe that I had truly imprinted. He believed that he was the only once who could imprint in our pack, and therefore there was no way that I could.

I had argued that the stories could be wrong. After all, we had never had such a large pack before. The stories told us they were small, only a few of us at a time. Maybe the stories were wrong about imprinting as well. Sam told me that even if that was true he didn't want to take the risk with letting her in if it wasn't imprinting.

Sam had told me time and time again to forget her and move on. He warned me about the consequences I would have to face if I eventually imprinted on another. Bella would be devastated, just as Leah had been. She would hate me for the rest of my life and there would be nothing I could do about it except live in regret.

I knew that Sam was wrong. I had imprinted on Bella. She was the one. Now the only problem was going to be proving it to him.

I walked to the front door and knocked. The glass door slid open. There was Emily, dressed in her favourite crimson red dress and black leggings. She smiled brightly, one side of her face pulling up while the other remained still.

My gaze waved to the left side of her face. Here large white scars traced through her hairline, over the corner of her eye, her cheeks and the corner of her mouth. They extended down her neck until they tapered to an end. These scars, although years old served as a daily reminder of how dangerous we really were.

My gaze locked back on the smooth skin that covered the right side of Emily's face.

"Hi Em" I greeted her "Is Sam in?"

"Yeah, he is. I'll go get him for you." Emily took a step back and slid the glass door closed. I watched as she walked up the stairs and out of sight.

Before long there was movement on the stairs again, but this time it wasn't Emily's slim figure that appeared. It was Sam's. He walked bare-footed down the wooden stairs, slowly coming into view. He was wearing a set of cargo pants which cut off half way down his shin. Like me, he was bare-chested. Sam was slightly smaller than me. His chest was less defined, his arms less sculpted. Just came to show that names aren't everything. Even if Sam was our leader or sorts, he wasn't necessarily the best.

Sam reached the door and slid it open.

"Jacob" he said in a way of greeting

"We need to talk" I said in the most serious tone I could.

"I see" he said "let's take this somewhere else, shall we?" Sam didn't wait for a reply but instead began to walk in the direction of the forest. I followed, knowing that it was pointless to argue.

We reached the shelter of the trees. My mind was ablaze as it thought about the argument it was about to follow through with. I had rehearsed this in my mind so many times and only hoped that it would work. For Bella's sake it had to.

Sam stood across from my, his arms crossed defensively across his chest. I crossed mine to match his stance.

"What's this about Jake?" he asked

"You know what this is about. It's what it's always been about."

Sam sighed exasperatingly "You know why we can't tell her Jake. It's too dangerous"

"Dangerous" I spat "That's a joke. I've spent almost every day with her the last few weeks and I haven't lost it once"

"What?" Sam was angry. His eyes pierced through me.

"You heard me. She came to see me. She's my other half. If you just accepted the fact that she's my imprint you would realise that there is no way to cut her off. She's going to find her way back to me whatever your orders are"

Sam huffed angrily, sizing me up.

"Jake, our way is not good for her"

"Really? Because I'm pretty sure the state I found her in wasn't good for her either. She can't sleep properly Sam. She needs me there to stop it all from crushing her. There's too much weight on her shoulders. It's not normal!"

"You're right. Nothing here is normal. That's why we need to leave it well enough alone. She's had her fair share of abnormal as it is. Don't you want to keep her sane?"

"Is that what this is about?" My arms tensed as everything clicked "It was never about her safety was it? It was always about her past." I closed my eyes and focussed on my breathing. I couldn't lose control, not now.

"She can't help being the Vampire girl. That guy, he pulled her in with his immortal charms. Their scents and looks are indescribable to humans. She couldn't help but 'love' him. But he used her, and then disposed of her without a second thought. He ruined her Sam, she needs help. I need to help her and I can't do that without letting her in. Every moment I leave her in the shadows I only hurt her more."

"Then leave" said Sam "Leave her and let her survive in a human world"

I could feel a growl reverberate through my chest at my next words "I can't. Haven't you been listening? She is my imprint. When are you going to accept that?" My breath was shallow, my nostrils flared. I had to control myself. I closed my eyes and thought of Bella. Her hand touched my shoulder lightly, calming me enough to listen to Sam's rebuff.

He stood there, watching me struggle with myself. He seemed unsure with himself

"You know it's true" I said, letting it sink in "She's my imprint. There's no way around it"

Sam lowered his head as he thought it over.

"That doesn't change the fact that she's been with one of them. How do you know they won't return? If we let her in she could easily go back to them. Our secrets would be out. Is that what you want Jake, to go against your own pack?"

I opened my eyes slowly. My strength had returned. I could make it through this.

"They won't" I said smoothly

"You can't know that"

"Sam" I said slowly "If they come back it'll be with a death wish. I won't let him get away with what he's done to her" My breathing was slow and deliberate as I forced down the monster within. It churned at the thought of that leech.

"Sam, the vampires we've been chasing around the outer edge. Don't you think it's a little strange? They are so persistent, yet there's none of their kind here. She could help us Sam. She knows things that could help us catch the slimy thing."

Sam sighed in defeat before I sealed the deal "She needs to know Sam. We need her to know, for her safety and ours."

"Alright" Said Sam "I can see that you're never giving up Jake. You are bound too deep. There is no way back now." Sam turned back to the house before turning to speak over his shoulder. His eyes were soft, almost worried and sad. "Just find a way to break it to her easily. She's fragile enough as it is" Sam stalked off, back through the trees towards the house.

_Dum dum duuuum! So, there's the big talk. How was that? I hope everything makes sense now. __I know that was a little shorter than the last few but since I only uploaded not that long ago this was all I had time for and I really wanted to let you guys read it _

_Thankyou to all my reviewers, once again you can see that all these reviews and adds have boosted my will to write :)_

_Thankyou to those who answered the questions in my last chapter. Just so you know I am keeping the rating as is._

_I was happy to know that you all felt the same way about a boyfriend revealing such personal things. I think we can all agree we'd be pretty upset._

_Let me know what you thought about this one._

_Love and light,_

_lee-leerose xx_


	14. Change

_Bonjour! Here we all are once again. _

_I hope you didn't feel like I abandoned you, because I didn't mean to. This chapter was by far the most difficult to write. I tried lots of different ways of writing the final reveal but none of them seemed right. This was the best I could do under the time pressure. Hopefully you all enjoy it. It is a relief to finally have Jake's true identity out in the open so we can progress to the next idea I have lined up for this story _

_I hope you like it. I went to a lot of effort for you all! :) _

_Enjoy,_

Lee-leerose xx

**Change**

BPOV

I awoke to the sun. Its rays were streaming across my face, bright and unrelenting. I screwed up my eyes to block the intense beams and rolled over. I stretched out my fingers, searching for his warmth. My hand ran over the space beside me as I searched for his warm chest. I reached the pillow where his head should have lay and realised that I had come up empty.

Jake wasn't there. Instead of the warm skin I was hoping for, instead my hand came into contact with something cold and smooth.

I opened my eyes again. I saw a small piece of a torn photograph lying in Jake's place. The undersized image was remanent of a much larger picture that had been destroyed in the previous day. I could just see the tops of Jake's and my faces visible in the bottom right hand corner. The majority of the leftover picture showed the forest next to Jake's house.

As I held the photo in my hand I noticed a strange texture covering the glossy image. I flipped over the photo to see a note scribbled in a familiar scrawl.

I smiled. He had gone to _sort everything out. _I was careful not to be too optimistic about what would emerge from this. It was possible that Jake wouldn't be able to tell me anything more than he already had, but there was still a glimmer of hope that maybe, just maybe I would finally know what this was all about.

I sat up. Too quickly it seemed as black spots covered my vision for a moment. Everything came into focus once again and I looked at my bedside table. There was no clock. Hmmm, that was weird.

Even though my eyelids were heavy with sleep and my body willed me to lie back down I knew that I couldn't keep the nightmares away without Jake here. I didn't want to chance another screaming episode when I was already so fragile.

I slipped off the bedcovers and slid my feet out from the warmth. They met the cold floor as I stood up. I stumbled forwards as sleep threatened to take over once again but I resisted and, putting one foot in front of the other, made my way to the door.

Suddenly a sharp pain ran through my numbed foot. It was as though pins and needles had pricked my toes. I looked down to see that I had strayed to the edge of a thin path that cleared the way through the mess I had made the previous day.

Everything that I loved was torn to shreds. Scraps of photographs and pages from my favourite books were strewn everywhere. My clothes were thrown across the floor, covering most of the room, spare this small trail that lead from my bed to my bedroom door.

I looked down to see that I was skimming the edge of the path. I could also see my missing alarm clock. The cord was pulled tight as it ran from where it was plugged in next to my bed to where I now stood.

I couldn't remember much from yesterday. After I had left Jake's everything seemed to mould together. From the state of my room I could see that the pain of the situation had gotten the better of me. I had cracked, and from the position of my clock it seemed that I had thrown it during my rage of fury. Fortunately the time was still illuminated across the screen, 8:32AM. Somehow I knew that I wouldn't be able to sit through school today, so I decided against getting dressed straight away.

I made my way to the door and opened it with ease. Rubbing my eyes as I walked down the stairs I moved drowsily into the kitchen. I took a slice of bread from the loaf on the counter and sat at the table. I had begun to nibble on the edge of the bread. I wasn't sure if my stomach could hold down anything substantial this morning, and I wasn't willing to test myself.

A few minutes passed before I noticed the flashing light. It caught my eye from the opposite side of the room. It was the phone. I got up and went to where it hung on the wall next to the fridge. The flashing told me that there was a new message. I clicked the playback button and listened to the familiar voice that redounded through the kitchen.

"_Hey Bells. It's me"_

Jake's voice filled my ears. It was as though the angels had sung, answering my prayers.

"You're probably still sleeping. Don't rush honey. I only wanted to let you know that everything's alright now. I've made everything better. If you like, call me back when you wake up and I'll come and get you. Then I can explain everything. I love you, Bella. See you soon"

The message stopped as a loud beeping filled the room.

A smile grew on my face. He had fixed everything. I gobbled down the rest of the slice of bread I still held in my hand and raced back up the stairs. I was alert now, every sense tingling with anticipation. At long last I was going to find out the truth.

I quickly changed out of the jeans and shirt that I was still wearing from the previous day, and into my skinnies, flats and plain white tee with one of Charlie's old checkered shirts thrown over the top for warmth.

In no time at all I was out the door and in the truck. I turned the key and the ignition started with a roar. It was almost as though my truck was just as eager to get to Jake's house as I was.

In my review mirror I could see Jake's bike leant up against the letterbox. I remembered that I had never really asked to take his bike. I had pretty much stolen it from him. However, I would have to return it at a later date as there was no way in hell that I was going to be able to lift that thing onto the back of my truck by myself.

I put the truck into gear and reversed out onto the street, trundling off as fast as I could in the direction of La Push.

/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/?/

"Bella" Jake called when I reached his place. He came running out the front door as soon as my truck came to an automated stop in front of his house.

I jumped out quickly and ran straight into his arms.

"Bella, I thought I told you to call. I would have come to pick you up. " He said, holding me tightly to his warm body. Even with a shirt on he was still as warm as always.

"Oh" I said quietly "I guess I just wanted to see you so badly I forgot"" Jake reached out with both hands to take my face, angling it up so that he could look directly into my eyes. His were kind, matching the smile of his mouth. I could feel myself being drawn in by that un-nameable invisible force.

"Bells, I made everything alright, just like I promised. Everything's going to work out." I smiled up at him, letting him know just how much that meant. "Come with me" he said, moving his hands from my face to intertwine our hands together. "I'll explain everything"

I followed Jake as he led me down the road. The bitumen turned into a rocky path, which finally led us onto the beach. The tide washed up and over the fine rocks, pushing them forwards and backwards, making a gentle whispering noise as though a million butterflies were beating their wings during that one moment.

Jake kept walking along the beach, pulling me closer to his side as the wind gradually picked up speed. It was cold, but pleasant. Jake kept my left side warm while the other tickled from the cool breeze. Charlie's old checkered shirt was no use when it came to stopping the penetrating wind.

It was a strange sensation to feel half cold and half warm, but somehow it felt familiar. It almost felt normal.

On one side I was alert, my hair standing up on end, goose bumps forming all over my skin, while the other half was warm and relaxed. It was strangely similar to how I had felt when he had still been here.

It was as though I was two different people again, sewn together down the middle. I was halved by what my body wanted and what my mind told me to do. I had been lost in the choice between him and Jacob.

One path offered danger, the thrill of the chase, immortality and a fairytale ending. He had seemed beautiful to my mundane human senses. The smell and handsome nature of him had seemed the world to me. On the other hand I could have chosen a life that was as easy as breathing. He was my best friend, my soul mate who would love me forever. No boundaries, no dangers, just us. I had chosen the latter, and I now knew that even if it wasn't quite as easy as breathing, this path was definitely the best thing for me.

Jake stopped once we reached a rather rocky area. Large boulders that seemed to have fallen from higher up were clumped together on the ground. Jake pulled me over to a large boulder. He slid his hands around my waist and lifted me so that I sat atop the rock. I moved my own hands to get a better grip on the wet surface.

Jake stood back and almost immediately began to pace. He took four large steps in the direction of the ocean before turning and walking back to where he had started. He turned yet again and took another four steps, then returned. This went on for a moment or two. I didn't interrupt his thinking process. His brows were furrowed as his brain ticked over, wonder how to explain everything to me.

He took a deep breath before stopping mid-pace to turn to me. I gulped a lungful of air and listened inventively. "Bella, I have no idea where to start" He shook his head slightly, looking at the ground beneath his feet.

"Well, the beginning is always good" I suggested. He looked up and I smiled encouragingly. Jake took another breath before continuing "Okay. You have known me for almost your whole life. We've grown up together, been severed apart, and then reunited once again.

"You know things about me that nobody else does. You know about my past and my present, you know how much I love the beach and the sun on my back, you know my favourite music, movies and celebrities. Bella, sometimes you know me better than myself.

"You were the first one to notice the changes in me too. Like how quickly I grew in such a short period of time; how high my body temperature is; how short my temper can be when I get angry; and even how rare it is for me to wear more than a pair of denim shorts.

"But these changes weren't just random, Bella. They happened because something changed in me."

Jake lapsed into silence, so I asked the question I had already answered for myself "When?"

"You remember that day we went to the movies with that guy...um, the pansy...?"

"Mike" I helped

"Yea, that's him. Mike. Well, you remember how I was ill that night?" I nodded as the memory flooded my mind.

_We had gone to the movies for the night; just Mike, Jake and I. It wasn't meant to be just us three, but unfortunately the others had bailed. That left our trio of awkwardness._

_At that point in time I had been desperate to hold myself together, as I had still been in the first stages of my recovery after _he_ left. I had found that movies filled with blood and gore helped my sanity more than the lovey dovey romances, so we had booked 3 tickets for a promising horror. Halfway through the movie Mike had left the cinema. I followed to check that he was alright. Jake was close behind me. _

_Mike had been extremely ill in the bathroom while Jake and I sat outside. We had talked. I had no idea about my true feelings for Jake at that time and had told him so, then and there. But Jake never gave up. He told me he would always be there for me. That was until I noticed that he wasn't looking too well._

_Jake had been boiling hot. His temperature climbed quickly as he came down with what I assumed was what Mike had. He went home for the night._

"That was the night I changed Bella." Jake spoke, taking me out of my memories "That was the night that everything became complicated"

I stared at him. I already knew this. Jake was only telling me things I already knew. Of course things were more difficult after that. I could remember that. What I wanted to know was why.

"What changed, Jake?" I asked, knowing how difficult this must be for him.

"You already know Bella." He said softly "Do you remember that day we walked down this beach, all that time ago?"

"Yea" I laughed, slightly confused where he was going with this tangent "Of course. You poor thing, having to endure my poor attempts at flirting"

"I didn't mind," He said, laughing back "I had been wanting to talk to you for ages"

Jake paused, looking as me with his gentle eyes. "Do you remember what I told you Bella?"

"The stories?" I asked

"Yes, especially the one concerning the Quiliettes"

I thought back to that day. It seemed so long ago. I remembered my determination to find out what _he_ was. Jake had unknowingly let me know about the 'Cold ones', better known as 'Vampires'. It was from then on that I knew _his _little secret.

"I remember parts of it" I said truthfully.

Jake's eyes saddened "But you don't remember anything I said about _our_ tribe?"

I shook my head as I tried to dig further into the memory, pulling back conversations and visions.

I could smell the sea, visualise Jake and I walking along the beach as the tiny rocks moved beneath our feet. I closed my eyes to feel the cool breeze, once more playing across the length of my exposed arms and pushing my hair out of my face.

As hard as I tried I could only remember snippets of the conversation. The parts that remained strongly attached to my memory were about _him. _Why hadn't I listened more closely? Surely there had to be something else that I could steal back from my memories.

Nothing came to me. Jake looked up at where I was perched on the rock. His eyes surveyed mine as I thought, wracking my brain for the information I needed. "I'm sorry Jake" I said softly "I can't remember"

Jake sighed and walked to the base of the rock. He placed his hands on the rough surface and pulled himself up to sit next to me. I shifted slightly to give him more room before he continued.

"There are stories about us, the Quiliettes." He started, his eyes turned towards the sea. "They tell us how to live and what to expect out of our lives. They begin with the very first tribe and every young child is brought up with them. My father used to tell me a story every night before I went to sleep. Each one taught me something about our people" Jake stopped and looked down at his hands, which were clasped, in his lap. I took them in my own and held them tightly.

"So, what are you saying Jake?" I asked, mystified with where he was headed.

Jacob took in a deep breath and turned himself so that his body faced mine. "Bella, I know how unstable everything has been for you and I want to make things better. You deserve stability in your life. God only knows what you've been through already and I don't want to make anything more difficult for you, but to do that I need to let you know everything, and _everything _might not be what's best for you."

I nodded

"I know it's hard. But Jake, I need to know. I need to be with you. That's all I'm asking for."

Jake grasped my hands tightly, now encasing them in his own.

"Please understand that some things may sound a little outrageous, even weird" he spoke sincerely "I hope that you can stand just a little more of the supernatural."

I nodded again, slower this time as I took in his words.

Supernatural? Sure, I had dealt with that sort of thing before. How bad could the Quiliette secret be? What could be worse than Vampires?

Jake squeezed my hands gently and continued.

"Bella, the stories about the cold ones always have another story entwined with them." He looked up at me "I have no idea how to slow into this so I'm going to come out with it tell us that Quiliettes are descended from wolves."

"Wolves?" I asked quietly "You mean..." I swallowed loudly "like howling at the full moon sort of wolves?" Jake nodded

"Yes. The wolves are our ancestors. It was said that they passed their powers down to us. At first I thought it was a load of superstitious nonsense, but the night I got ill, I wasn't really sick per se. I was undergoing the change that so many of my ancestors have done before me."

I looked down at our hands, entwined in Jake's lap as I tried to comprehend what he was saying. He had undergone a change. But how was that possible?

"So that night you..."

"Phased" I inhaled sharply.

"So, you changed into a wolf. Does that mean you have powers like a wolf? Like super hearing and super smell?"

Jake smiled "That's one way of putting it. Somehow, the Quiliettes have the power to take on a wolf form. We are extremely strong and fast. Our instincts are sharper than normal. We are essentially the kind of thing you'd expect to find in a horror film. You'd probably call us 'Werewolves', but unlike the horror films we aren't the bad guys, Bells. We're here because it is our job to protect the pale faces from the cold ones. That is why we exist, to rid the world of those leeches." My memory jolted, the pieces of the puzzle falling into place.

I did nothing. I only sat there looking down at my tiny hands, which were still encased in Jake's giant ones. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. There was no way that this was real. It was insane. 'Werewolves'! They were the things of legend and simple folklore that was all. They weren't _real._

My stomach churned as I thought it through. I had discovered the existence of Vampires, which were meant to exist only in film and books. How impossible was it that werewolves (or just wolves-as Jake called them) existed as well? What if all the stories were true? Was it possible that nothing was as 'normal' as it was believed to be?

I lowered my gaze to stare at the pebbles beneath the boulder we sat on. My head span with what he was telling me. It swam around my mind, circling every thought. _Wolves._

Suddenly Jake sighed deeply, unclasped my hands and slid off the rock, walking quickly in the direction of the forest.

"Jake!" I called as I slid off the boulder and attempted to follow him. The wet pebbles slipped under my feet as I tried to walk faster to catch up with him.

He turned. "Yea?"

I caught up to him, gasping for air. "Wait, please. Where are you going?" I said quickly, still at a loss for breath.

"I need to show you" Jake said simply "I'll be back in a minute" He kissed my forehead lightly and walked into the forest.

Bewildered, I took a few steps back before sitting down on the crushed rocks. My head was still spinning so I lay back. My hair fanned out around me like a halo, mixing with the sandy rocks.

_Werewolves_

_How was that possible?_

I stared at the clouds as they passed over me, low and dark. I closed my eyes and allowed my mind to take over as my tired body rested.

_Jake's strange behaviour and sudden change._

_The Cult._

_Sam's rules._

They all made sense now, but it was still difficult to comprehend what it meant in the scheme of things.

I felt a drop of water fall on my cheek. It was going to rain, I was going to get wet, and without Jake I would freeze.

Deciding to find cover I opened my eyes and screamed. Hovering above me was something large and hairy. Its wet nose touched my face slightly as it obscured the clouds from my sight.

My first thought was that it was a bear, but when my eyes adjusted I could clearly see the long muzzle that could never have belonged to a bear.

The animal moved away from me as I shrieked. It whimpered slightly, as though hurt. I sat up and scuffled away from the creature. I pulled my legs to my chest and wrapped my arms around to hold them tightly to me. I cowered as I sat, rocking slightly on the pebble-ridden beach.

I was shaking madly as I sat there, curled up into a tight ball on the cold ground. I never let my sight waver from the animal. Even from this far away it seemed to press down on me as it's form took up most of my surroundings.

It was from this vantage point that I could really take in the size of the thing. It was huge, larger than any bear I had ever seen. Its long, strong body was covered in rustic brown fur, which ruffled in the wind. The animal's paws padded up and down nervously on the ground. His ears were perked up as though listening for something while his tail hung behind his huge body.

The animal was really quite graceful with its long legs and strong body, but overall the most beautiful things were his eyes. They were a dark brown, deep enough to see into the creature's soul. It was a lovely soul. It glistened in the light as he looked down at me, his face filled with sadness and confusion. The animal let out a rumbling whine. I stared at it as it cocked its head to one side, and then the other.

Jake.

I gasped. This was Jake. His eyes were fixed on me as they watched me warily from the body of an oversized wolf. When I didn't respond the wolf dropped his head and whined lowly.

He was sad, moping even. My heart cracked as he backed away. The wolf raised his head slightly. No, _Jake _raised his head slightly. His face was sad, mouth turned down, eyes glistening. I couldn't feel my body. My legs tingled as I tried to work up the courage to move. My muscles were stiff. Blood pumped loudly in my ears as adrenaline took over.

I stood up carefully and steadied my shaking legs. Taking one trembling step at a time I walked to where the wolf sat, his eyes fixed on the ground.

I was within an arms length when I instinctively reached out. My hand found the soft fur behind his ears and ruffled it slightly.

The wolf looked up at me, tilting his head once again. "Jake" I whispered, "Is that you?"

The wolf moved his head so that my hand buried deeper into his soft fur. His chest reverberated in a low growl. I moved closer and bowed my head to his so that our foreheads touched. His fur tickled my face as I moved my hands to cup either side, as I would have done if he were human.

Everything I had ever known and learnt about Jacob came rushing back. The many books about wolves that he had stashed in his room, the way that his eyes sometimes expressed so much emotion that he resembled an animal rather than a passive human, and how easy his temper was to set off. All of these things suddenly made sense as I put two and two together.

I held the wolf's face to mine, breathing in his odour. It was similar to Jake's regular woodsy scent, but now there was something else added. There was a zing that didn't seem to be there before.

Jake's low growling turned into an almost purr. I pulled back to run my hands through his coat of shaggy reddish brown fur and he purred louder.

"Jake" I said simply "My Jake"

The wolf's eyes met mine and in that instant I could see myself reflected in his dark orbs. I was finally seeing him as his true self. There were no secrets between us. We were free.

The wolf held my gaze for a moment longer before he jerked his head slightly towards the forest. I took the hint and released his fur from my grip. Jake ran into the forest at full speed while I stood on the shore waiting.

I didn't have to wait long before I could see Jake's face and body emerge from the trees. He was in human form, wearing his cut of denim shorts and carrying his shirt in his hand.

As Jake came closer to where I stood he slowed down until he finally came to a stop about two meters in front of me. He slowly brought his arms up so that his hands were raised above his shoulders, opening them wide as though showing me that he meant no harm.

"Hey Bella" he said softly "It's me"

I only stared back at him. Of course it was him. Who else would it be?

Jake caught my eye and kept my gaze, holding me where I was. "Don't be afraid" he said "I won't hurt you"

He thought I was frightened of him. "I'm not scared of you" I said, taking a step towards him. Jake stepped back at the same time, as though we were two south ends of a magnet trying to push together. "No, Bella, if you don't want to be near me I understand. Don't make yourself feel uncomfortable for my sake"

I took the next few steps in quick succession and caught his hands in mine before he could move anywhere. "I'm not scared," I said again.

Jake's eyes softened and his large arms wound into their familiar position around me. "Really? It doesn't bother you that I'm a monster?"

"Well, it's not the first time I've been introduced to the idea that the supernatural exist"

"True" Jake said, tugging me closer. I buried my face into the crook of his neck and breathed in his scent. The extra _something_ was gone. He was the familiar woodsy scent again "But that doesn't change the fact that I might not be good for you" He said, his throat buzzing against my cheek.

"Not good for me?" I asked, pulling back to look at him "I think I've been through enough to know what things aren't good for me, and you are definitely not one of those things"

Jake smiled and leant down to capture my lips with his for a moment. He pulled back slightly "You seriously don't mind that I phase into a big hairy wolf?"

I pulled his face back to mine and captured his lips once more. "Of...course...not" I said through kisses. "The only thing I care about is you keeping these things away from me. This secret almost got the better of both of us Jake"

Jake sighed and raised his hand to cup my cheek. I pressed it closer and raised my own hand to hold it there.

"I know" he said quietly "It killed me not being able to tell you Bella. You have no idea how much I wanted to tell you. Unfortunately Sam didn't quite see eye to eye with me"

"Why was that?" I asked, leaning my forehead against his and closing my eyes.

Jake took a deep breath "Sam had his reasons. He's been through more than you know. That doesn't mean that I agreed with him mind" He added quickly "I pleaded with him to let me tell you and he finally agreed"

"What was it that finally made him see clearly?" I opened my eyes to see his lips tighten in response, his face contorted, causing lines to form across his normally smooth skin. Jake's arms tighten protectively around me when he finally answered "Don't be scared Bella"

"I'm not scared of you," I repeated, sounding like a broken record.

"Not me Bells" Jake opened his eyes to look at me. They were filled with anger and hate. I shivered slightly. Now he was scaring me

"Jake" My voice wavered with that once syllable, drawing it out in warning. Jake's look was murderous. His gaze was fixed on a point to the left of me. I moved my hands to lay flat on his bare chest

"What's wrong?"

Jake's vision shifted suddenly. He looked at me, and the anger and hate disappeared to be replaced with something closer to sadness "Sorry Bells" He said quietly. "I just can't stand them"

"What?" I was frustrated. Something was making him angry and I didn't know about it.

"The bloodsuckers. That's why Sam didn't want you to know"

My mind snapped in on itself like a rubber band, protecting any part that might be harmed by the thoughts that were bound to follow this statement

"It's no one we know," he said in response to my sudden change of character "They've been skirting the perimeter, dancing along it but never actually crossing the border. It's as though they know exactly where our territory lies. Sam thought you'd be in more danger if you knew we were keeping them out. I tried to tell him that you didn't know them but he didn't want to take the chance. He thought you might try and keep us from doing our job."

"How many?" I asked innocently, secretly relieved that they weren't familiar vampires.

"Two. A redhead. The other one's darker with dreadlocks"

I froze. Victoria and Laurent. They were here. They had found me. I could feel my mind dragging me down as the fear took over me. She was here to avenge James by killing me. She still believed that _he_ would do anything to save me. What she didn't know was what had occurred in recent times.

Jake shook me lightly. "Bells, Bells. What's the matter?"

"Victoria and Laurent" I gasped from my shaking lips.

"_Do_ you know them?" he asked, surprised

I nodded

"Do you know what they want?"

I nodded again and gulped loudly "Me"

_Bow chika waow waow! All done! So, that was hard. __After all, this would have to be one of the most important parts of the story for Jake and Bella. I believe something like this shows just how strong their relationship is. __Personally I think I deserve a review from everyone who reads this. You make up your own mind though. Let me know what you thought. Loved it? Hated it? Made you physically ill? Whatever you think, I'd love to get inside those gorgeous brains of yours and find out how this chapter was, so please review :p_

_Also, I am looking for a Beta. I think it would help if i had someone else reading my story as I miss the spelling mistakes and awkward expression. If you're interested please PM me :)_

_Got to go do some more homework. Only first week back and I'm already in over my head!_

_TTFN,_

_lee-leerose xx_


	15. At the Beginning

_Song: Taken from the original movie soundtrack of 20__th__ Century Fox's "Anastasia" _

_NB: I do not own any characters. Stephanie Meyer is the lucky ducky who thought it up first. I have used some of my fave parts of NEW MOON and adapted them to form this story, the way I want it to be told, but any other deviations are completely my own_

**AT THE BEGINNING**

**JPOV**

(Continued from last chapter)

"How many?" Bella asked, her voice light and off hand.

"Two" I replied "A redhead. The other one's darker with dreadlocks"

Bella's body froze. She became a statue, barely showing any signs of life other than the odd shuddering breath and blink of her eyes. I shook ger gently, trying to loosen her cemented formation.

"Bells, Bells. What's the matter?" I asked, worriedly.

"Victoria and Laurent" She gasped. Her voice shook along with the rest of her. I held her closer, squeezing her tense body to mine, trying desperately to calm her. I was surprised that she knew their names. Sam was right to think what he had.

"Do you know them?" I said

She nodded, several movements in quick succession.

"Do you know what they want?" I pried further, knowing the answer couldn't be good. No matter what Bella said, Vampire's intentions were never good. They always wanted one thing over everything else. Blood. And blood meant death.

She nodded in response and gulped loudly "Me"

Now it was my turn to freeze "You?" I asked, unable to move "They want you? But why?"

Bella's eyes were damp with tears, which she fought to hold back. She sniffed and mumbled, "_He_ killed her mate, James. The redhead, Victoria, she wants to avenge her dead mate by killing _me_."

"But why not kill _him_? _He_ was the one who killedher mate."

Bella leant into me and shook her head against my shoulder. Her hair brushed my bare skin. "She thinks it will be worse for_ him_ if she kills _his_ mate"

"But" I stuttered loudly "But you're not even with _him_ anymore"

Bella shook her head once more before lifting it to focus her beautiful eyes upon mine. They were shining with tears, which ran silently down her cheeks. When she spoke again a single drop met her upper lip and stopped in its tracks. "She doesn't know that. She thinks it'll be the perfect revenge. A mate for a mate, an eye for an eye, if you know what I mean."

I couldn't speak.

These bloodsuckers, leeches, monsters, were after my Bella. And it was all because of that stupid vampire. I couldn't believe that even after all she had been through, somehow he was still managing to stuff around with her life.

Shocked and frightened, Bella held me as tightly as she could. Her tiny arms were wrapped around my waist as she tried to press her petite body to mine.

I only pulled her closer. I wouldn't let anything happen to her. There was no way any leech was going to get their hands on _my_ Bella.

We would have to see Sam about this. He had to know right now. The sooner we got this sorted out the sooner Bella would be safe.

"C'mon" I whispered into her ear. I stood back slightly, but Bella didn't move. She was still frozen in the same position. "Bells?" Bella only shook her head and raised her hands to cover her tear covered face. Her body started to shake again as the realisation of what she had just said set in.

"They're after me" she sobbed. Bella's legs collapsed beneath her and she fell forwards. I caught her in the knick of time. My wolf instincts were handy in cases like this.

"Bells" I said again as I pulled her up, clasping underneath her arms to take on all of her body weight. "We need to see Sam, Bella. We'll make sure they won't be able to get to you" Bella leant into me and moved her arms to hug me tightly. "I will keep you safe" I promised.

There was no way that I was going to live without her. I would have to do everything in my power to keep her out of harm's way.

**BPOV**

We reached Sam's house just after mid-morning. The sun shone bright streaks of light over the trees surrounding the small abode. The god-rays gave the place a homely feeling. Even though this was the first time I had been here, this place felt familiar and safe.

Jake parked my truck just outside the front door. He was acting like it was a liability to let me drive or something. True enough that I had collapsed in front of him - again - but really, I was fine. My head hurt a little from the stress, but it was nothing worse than I had coped with before.

However, my complaints had been futile. Jake had insisted on letting me rest while he drove us to Sam's. "After all" he said "It's not like this has been an easy day for you"

I had to agree with him on this point. It hadn't been an easy day. I mean, it's not like I was used to finding out that my boyfriend could phase into a huge wolf. I had dealt with the supernatural in the past, but there was only so much that one could take.

Jake popped open his door and slid out of the front seat. He walked around to my side and opened my door for me. I turned to Jake and dangled my feet out the door. The ground below me was damp and slippery. For someone as clumsy as me this was definitely not the safest thing.

Jake took my hands and I held on tightly as I slipped off my seat and out of the truck. My feet impacted with the ground and Jake's right arm wound its way around my waist to steady me. "Thanks" I said, giving him peck on the cheek.

"Anything to keep you safe" he replied. These words didn't seem to fit with what he had just helped me with. Even if I did often acquaint my face with the ground I walked on, it wasn't about to kill me.

I knew that Jake was still thinking about the danger of Victoria and Laurent. His face was serious as he answered and walked me to the house. He opened the door, without knocking, and led me inside.

Once I crossed the threshold a fantastic aroma reached me. It was sweet and delicious. My mouth began to water and Jake led me on through the house.

It was small and cottagy. We walked down a small hallway with rooms coming off to the side. Some were open, others closed off. From what I saw, whoever lived here loved their browns. Everything matched the natural tones, mixed with creams and tinted yellows.

It was beautiful. As small as the rooms were the decorating really opened them up making them feel homely and peaceful.

Jake and I reached the end of the hall. Here it opened up into a larger room. The ceiling had been raised slightly to accommodate for the area. My eyes wandered over the cream sofa in the lounge room, the polished amber table in the dining area and then the dark brown benches of the kitchen.

It was here that the aromas filled my head completely. Whatever it was, it was absolutely mouth-watering. I looked around for the source and saw a small woman facing away from me. Her figure was thin, shown by the apron she had strapped tightly around her waist. Her long black hair flowed straight down her back, moving with her as she hummed to herself while she baked.

"Hey Em" greeted Jake.

The woman turned around and I couldn't help but gasp at what I saw. Her face was beautiful. Smooth skin, smiling lips and rosy cheeks. However, there was one detail that couldn't go unnoticed.

On the left side of her face ran a jagged line. It moved from her hairline, down over her eye and past her nose, and then it captured the corner of her mouth, which brought that half down into a grimace. The scar continued to her chin where it tapered off.

Jake's hand found mine and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Em, this is Bella" he said, gesturing to me "Bells, this is Emily"

Emily pulled off the oven mitts which covered her hands as she came over to where we stood "You can call me Em" she said in a soft voice. She offered her hand in greeting and I took it. My hand was met with the scared skin that covered her palm. It was as though she had been sliced in many places at once. The streaks on her hand seemed to match those that tapered off on her face as though they could be two adjacent puzzle pieces.

Emily released my hand and pulled Jake into a sisterly hug. "How are you?" she asked " I hope you're hungry 'cos I've baked up a treat for you guys"

"You know we're always hungry," Jake said, licking his lips at the thought.

We sat at the dark wooden table as Emily brought over a batch of freshly baked biscuits. They smelt as good as they looked.

"Bella" Jake said, gesturing for me to take a cookie from the plate. I took the top one. It was still warm from the oven and as I took a bite the taste filled my mouth. It was amazing. She was definitely a good cook. Emily looked at me expectantly and I swallowed "Delicious". Emily smiled as she took one for herself, and Jake followed.

Together, we made our way through the plate of biscuits one by one. Jake had more than his fair share, but I figured that his hunger was one of the side effects of being able to phase into a wolf.

By the time Jake polished off the last crumb there was a loud *bang* from the front of the house. A few seconds later three large male figures entered the room. I recognised the smaller two of the trio instantly. Quil and Embry were grinning from ear to ear. They wore the regular get-up of a pair of shorts and nothing else, with bare feet and chests.

Embry was the first to notice my presence. "Hey Bella" He said, nudging Quil in the side. I noticed that Quil seemed to stand taller. He pulled his torso tight to show off his abs and flexed his biceps slightly. "Hey Bells" Quil said, copying Embry in his greeting. "Hey guys" I said, careful to avert my eyes from Quil as much as possible.

Jake cleared his throat and stared pointedly at the pair. "Oh, yea" Quil mumbled, scratching the back of his head in embarrassment "We're sorry...y'know, about...well, about everything we said the other day"

"Yea" chipped in Embry "we're really sorry. We didn't mean to take it so far"

"We forgot about _everything_" amended Quil.

I could tell from the look in their eyes that they meant what they were saying. "It's alright guys. You can't change the past"

"Thanks Bella. It won't happen again" They said in unison.

Jake nodded his head once and the boys scampered off towards Emily who now stood in the kitchen, serving up another batch of biscuits.

I looked back at the doorway to see the largest of the three leaning against the wall. He seemed relaxed and lost in thought. His gaze was glazed over as he stared at Jake and I sitting at the table. I shivered slightly and moved my hand to Jake's leg. He took it in his own and stroked my palm soothingly with his thumb.

I didn't need the small mention of the name that Jake whispered into my ear to know who this man was. His large arms were crossed defensively across his bare chest. I could see that although he was in very good form it didn't quite match up to Jake's. Somehow Jake's build seemed more impressive, more superior.

My blood boiled with emotions I couldn't quite place. I was angry about everything this man had put us through by not allowing Jake to tell me anything; I was confused about why exactly that had been; and I was sad to know that he was bound to this life forever.

This life seemed to have aged him. His face sported a few more lines than previous days. The last time I had seen him had been that day that Jake and I had fought. He seemed to have been through a lot since then, as though something was keeping him up at night. I couldn't help but wonder if this might be the same thing that caused my nightmares.

"Sam" Jake nodded his head in acknowledgment of his leader. Sam nodded back "Jake" His lips tightened momentarily before he added "Bella" and nodded curtly in my direction.

"Sam" I responded in the most polite voice I could muster considering the situation. I looked back down at where my hand lay in Jake's lap. He was now tracing each bone as it ran beneath my flesh.

I heard a sigh from near the door and could see Sam walking towards us from the corner of my eye. Sam pulled out the seat across from us and sat down. I flipped my hand palm-up so that I could hold on securely to Jake's.

I lifted my chin to see Sam looking at us both. There was no readable emotion in his eyes. They were only brown and held no meaning when compared to Jacob's. I turned my face to Jake and was met with the large brown orbs. His eyes were questioning. I felt like a book, being read from page to page. Jake knew how I felt. He understood.

Jake faced Sam once more "Sam, I do believe you owe Bella an explanation"

Sam sighed and leant back in his wooden chair. I waited in silence, glancing up from beneath my eyelashes…

_If this chapter seems unfinished it's because it is. These past few weeks haven't been too good for me. I have been having some problems at home with my parents (the usual) but also just found out that my best friend of 6 years has been diagnosed with depression. As you can only imagine I'm feeling horrid at the moment and I'm afraid that writing is the last thing I feel like doing. This was what I got up to before I kind of bummed out. _

_It may be a while until my next update._

_I'll try to keep inspired, but it's hard. _

_Until the next chapter,_

_Best wishes,_

_Lee-leerose _


	16. How I Feel

_Hey there,_

_I'm feeling a little better. Still not 100%, but still it's better than before._

_Thank you for your kind words, they were very sweet._

_Here's the next chapter, just because I love you all so much :) Warning: it may be a little angry and confusing, but that's how I feel at the moment and it comes through in my writing._

_Enjoy. Oh and chapter name is a song by Kelly Clarkson. It doesn't really have much to do with the chapter itself but it's a good song nonetheless,_

_Lee-leerose xx_

_NB: Nothing is mine. Don't sue me. I only manipulate the plot and characters to do what I only wish they could have done in the books._

**Chapter 17: HOW I FEEL**

_(Continued from last chapter)_

Sam sighed and leant back in his wooden chair. I waited in silence, glancing up from beneath my eyelashes.

"What is it that you want me to explain?" asked Sam. His voice was surprisingly softer than I had expected. It was almost sympathetic.

"She wants you to explain about th..."

"Sorry" Sam interrupted, holding up a hand to stop Jake from answering "But that question was directed at Bella and I would prefer it if she told me what _she _ wants me to explain"

I looked up and stared at Sam. After weeks of keeping me out of the action he was actually talking to me. I was stunned at this new change but composed myself in time to answer. I cleared my throat and asked the ever pending question "Why didn't you trust me? You believed I wouldn't keep your secret, but why?"

Sam sighed and fixed his eyes on mine. Even though his voice was warm and sympathetic his eyes told a different story. They were harsher than Jake's - dark and guarded. I felt exposed as I sat in front of him. He stared at me , piercing through any sort of shield I could hold in front of my emotions and thoughts. He could read me just as easily as Jake could. But this felt intrusive and wrong. He didn't own my mind, not in the way that Jake did.

Darkness seemed to be permanently etched in rings around his eyes just as the scars were eternally etched into Emily's face. For his age his face seemed older, wrinkles lined up beneath his dark eyes and ran in crevices off the corner of each. The tiredness seeped through his strong stature. Even as he sat in this room as a leader and protector I could tell he had been affected by many sleepless nights. His shoulders slumped ever so slightly in his seat while his arms lay crossed on his chest. His face was hard, unrelenting, unsmiling -it was scarily sad. He was a man with a past and present so stressful I could almost taste it. As much as I detested everything that he had done I couldn't help but feel saddened by what this life was doing to him.

I looked away from those piercingly dark eyes to look instead at my hand curled tightly with Jake's. My fingers had turned white with the amount of pressure I was exerting on Jake's hand. He ran his thumb over my knuckles in an attempt to calm me.

Sam began to speak in the same soft voice "Bella, you have to understand that I didn't want to hurt you. I only wanted to protect you and everyone else for that matter"

"Protect?" I questioned

"Yes. There are dangerous creatures out there Bella. No doubt Jacob has told you about them"

I nodded and waited. I knew he meant Vampires. What else could he be talking about? Unless witches existed as well, in which case I should probably be scared of being turned into a toad.

"I was afraid that if we let you in, you might let slip our 'trade secrets' to your little friends"

"_Friends?" _I spat. Suddenly my bravery stepped up a notch "Since when have _Victoria _and_ Laurent_ been my friends?"

Sam's eyes widened "You_ know_ them?" he near growled, leaning forwards slightly. I leant forwards in retaliation. Even though I knew how tentative his temper could be there was no way he was going to scare me off. Just because he turned into a fully grown wolf didn't mean he had the right to growl at me.

"If by 'know them' you mean that they've come close to having my blood for breakfast, then yeah, I know them"

_"What? Why?" _Demanded Sam.

"That's why we came to see you, Sam" Jake added in a calming voice. "We had to tell you"

Sam ignored Jake and continued to stare at me. "Why would they want you?" He was curious.

"_He _killed Victoria's mate and now she wants to kill me in revenge_"_

"So, you're far from friends then" said Sam "We could have killed them when we had the chance" Sam shot Jake a look that clearly said 'I told you so'.

A growl echoed around the room. It was almost as though someone had turned on the surround sound system. There could have been an earthquake at that moment and the sound would have mingled with their growls. This time it wasn't just Sam's emotions that were in a knot. I looked beside me to see that Jake was sitting half bent in the chair. His hands held mine tighter than ever. The chatter in the kitchen had ceased and I looked up to see that Embry and Quil were also half bent in attempt to keep their emotions from bursting through. Emily stood beside the boys. Her eyes filled with fear as she attempted to calm them by rubbing their backs with motherly affection.

"Hang on" I said "You had the chance to kill them and you didn't?" I looked around at the four wolf-men, breathing deeply and completely in sync with one another. Sam, Quil and Embry all looked towards Jake. I followed their gaze and narrowed my eyes questioningly "I thought it was your duty to kill vampires? Why didn't you?"

Jake stared straight ahead as he answered. "We caught up to them on the border. I didn't want to hurt them if there was a chance they were friends of yours. The others were all for killing them, but I couldn't do it. Not if there was a chance of hurting you"

Guilt filled my heart. They were still alive because of me, and they were coming to Forks, because of me. He loved me more than I deserved.

"And now there's an even higher risk of them hurting her. Not just emotionally, but physically too" growled Quil.

Then Jake did something I'd never seen before. He stood up fluidly, pushing the table away. He placed himself in front of me protectively with his arms outstretched and feet planted firmly on the ground. A growl reverberated through his chest and he snarled loudly at Quil, showing off his pearly white teeth. "Don't you EVER tell me I'm putting Bella at high risk! You know damn well that I only did it to protect her from more hurt!"

"But we weren't able to attack them without you. We would have died like puppies being picked off one by one" Embry growled from behind Quil "Who's more important. Your Pack, or _her_?"

"Don't you dare tell me I've got my priorities wrong! She's my life. She comes first"

"I could've guessed as much. I suppose an _imprint _is more important than family, hey?" growled Quil, sarcastically.

This was so strangely animalistic that I found myself staring in amazement. I could see the wolf inside Jake coming out more and more with each turn of the conversation. Quil was hunched over, his head raised to look at Jake. His glare was murderous. He stepped towards Jake, a low growl in his throat. He was angry. This was bad.

I stood up and flung myself in front of Jake and Quil. "Stop this!" I screamed. Jake seemed not to notice me. His eyes were still fixed on Quil. I stepped towards him and shoved his chest roughly with my hands. Although this was nowhere near enough strength to budge an angry Jacob, it was enough to make him realise that his arms were no longer forming a protective barrier between my human body and Quil's wolf-like one.

Jake's eyes refocused on me. His angry expression disappeared and was replaced by one of surprise. "Bells..." He moved as though to grab my arm to pull me out of harms way but I moved back, closer to Quil.

"Don't _Bells_ me" I spoke with authority and sureness. "Stop fighting. You're only making things worse."

"Yea. Stop trying to make things better Jake. You'll only stuff things up even more" sneered Quil from behind me. I spun around to face him. He had straightened his posture and now stood with his arms crossed on his chest. I stalked up to him, death written all over my face "and _you" _

Quil stepped back in surprise "you stay the hell out of my boyfriends face. You got that?" Quil nodded silently.

"Gah!" I tossed my arms in the air and looked at the ceiling "You're all acting like testosterone mad teenage boys" My hands came down on my thighs with a slap and the room went oddly silent.

Everyone was staring at me. Embry had seemed to calm down in the kitchen. Emily stood beside him, eyes teary and hands shaking in fear. Quil looked ashamed, his head hung, staring at his feet. Jake moved to my side and took my hand in both of his. "I'm sorry Bella. That was inexcusable" I sighed and closed my eyes. When I opened them I saw Quil looking up at me "Sorry" he mumbled. "That was out of line". I felt my lips tighten into a line as I bit back the rude response screaming in my head. Instead of taking the risk of opening my mouth I nodded slightly.

I looked back to where Sam sat at the table. His eyes were no longer penetrating, but calculating. It was as though he was sizing me up. "Well, turns out you're stronger than I gave you credit for"

I smiled grimly "I wouldn't have survived over these last few months if I wasn't. But now that I've finally let go of my past life and begun a new one it's once again being threatened by stupid vampires. So, what are we going to do to fix that?"

There was a exaggerated silence before Quil stepped forwards once more. "We fight" his voice was strong and sure. Embry stepped forwards not long after and nodded his head once in agreement "Let's take them down". Sam stood and glanced at me once before saying "It's why we are what we are". Jake was the last to answer. He took a moment to gather his thoughts before saying gently "For you"

I grinned. Those vampires were going down.

Later that night we arrived back at Jake's house. My heart was feeling lighter already. We had discussed plans and tactics that would help us to capture and kill Laurent and Victoria.

First, Quil, Embry, Sam and Jake would take turns patrolling the lines. When they saw or heard anything they'd keep to the shadows and send a telepathic note (as apparently wolves could speak to each other by just thinking something) back to Paul who would be remaining in wolf form at La Push. When the time came he would warn the rest of the wolves and gather them to leave for the fight.

It was a foolproof plan. There was just one problem though. Victoria and Laurent were after _me_. Therefore there was a high chance of them turning up in Charlie's front yard. Jake refused to let me be left alone and unprotected, so it was decided that the wolves who were left not patrolling the lines would hide in the trees near my house and keep a look out for any looming threats. Jake had taken it upon himself to claim the duty of staying in my room through the nights to ensure that I was out of harms way (with the ulterior motive of making sure I didn't give into my nightmares.)

Sam had agreed to the whole plan with the condition that when the time came to kill the vampires, Jacob would leave me to help his brothers fight. Jake had agreed against his will, and so the plan was settled.

Once back at Jake's place I said a quick goodbye to Billy and hopped in my truck. Jake would be around later tonight to start his shift. He had wanted to come straight away but I told him that it probably wasn't the best idea to let Charlie know that he was staying in my room for the night. Jake agreed grudgingly and with a quick kiss on the lips he let me drive away.

_Righty oh. Here's the next part to the last chapter. Ideally I would have had it uploaded as a whole but due to certain circumstances at the moment I have not found the will to write until today._

_I am really proud of this chapter. I think it shows just how strong Bella can be. I mean, for a chick that's been through so much already she can't always be seen as the weak one. It was fun to position her as a strong woman. It was also good to get some experience writing about angry wolves. I loved making Quil snap like that. It was fun._

_Anywho please review. You all know how much it means. Seriously, your reviews make my day so please take the time to send your thoughts and queries. Let's see if we can make it to 100 reviews. All it takes is a click on the button below. Just Click it. Come on, you know you want to :)_

_love and best wishes,_

_lee-leerose xx_


	17. Mistaken Identity

_hey y'all,_

_It's been a better week. Hoping this story's going alright. You guys seem to be a bit slack with those reviews :(_

_Thanks goes to those who did take the time to tell me what they thought; "JacobLupo", ".17", "crazyreaderduh", "heartcorejasmin", "liv2read2luv", "dijah 15" and "reads2survive", thank you all so much._

_Unfortunately we didn't make it to the big 100, but I hope this chapter will get us over the edge _

_This one's to the tune of Delta Goodrem's Mistaken Identity. Perhaps you know it, perhaps not_

_happy reading,_

_lee-leerose xx_

**Chapter 17: MISTAKEN IDENTITY**

It was late. I had eaten, showered, brushed my teeth, cleaned my room (which had taken a while considering what a mess I had left it in) and I now sat in front of my bookshelf wondering which book I should choose to read while I waited for Jake. Charlie was in bed already. His soft snores could be heard from down the hall. It was oddly satisfying to know that he had no idea what was going on right under his nose. After all this time he was still clueless to the fact that vampires existed, let alone my new revelation about werewolves being more than just a scary campfire story.

Staring at my collection of books nothing really jumped out at me. There were my all time favourites like _Romeo and Juliet and Wuthering Heights _which I had read so often that I could have repeated them word for word. Other books included crimes and thrillers which had enticed me for a short period of time during my early teens. I decided against these however as I already had enough thrill to last me a lifetime without reading about the stuff. My old _Goosebumps_ collection also lined the shelves from my tween years. It was strange to think that the monsters in these childish books were real. The vampires and werewolves were no longer a part of my childhood horrors. They were now a part of my everyday life.

I stood up and walked to the window which I had left open slightly to make things easier for Jake. The cool breeze of the dark night blew in. I shivered as it cut through my sweats. It was pitch black outside, except for the miniscule florescence of a glowing streetlight which shone a few houses down. I could see the faint outline of the forest that edged our yard. Somewhere in there Embry and Quil were beginning their first shift on night watch. Tonight Sam was running the boundaries, and tomorrow they would rotate, like children on a duty roster. It wouldn't be long now and Jake would arrive.

Another cold breeze swept through the gap in the window. I shivered slightly. I couldn't imagine being outside right now. I would surely freeze within moments of my tiny limbs meeting the cold air. I guess that was one of the positives of being a wolf. The fur coat was bound to keep the warmth in while stopping the cold from penetrating your skin.

I moved away from the window as another gust of wind swirled in and went back to my bed. I tucked myself beneath the covers, making sure that every part of me was covered apart from the small slit where my eyes could peek through to watch each minute as it slowly ticked over on my alarm clock.

10:56pm

My breath had successfully heated my face beneath the blanket. The warmth was trapped beneath the thick layer which served just as a fur coat would. I watched silently as time passed.

10:57pm

10:58pm

Sticking my feet out of the blanket for mere seconds I realised that maybe I should have closed the window completely and waited for a sign from Jake to open it. My room was now a bitter cold. I rewrapped myself securely and started my warming process again.

10:59pm

He had to be here soon. I was counting on him. Even though I knew there was nothing to fear from Victoria and Laurent now that the wolves knew what she was after there was still a sliver of uncertainty in my thoughts. A campaign of "what if?" thoughts trailed through my mind. What if someone got hurt because of me? What if Victoria and Laurent got through the boundary somehow and made it to the house? What if they hurt Charlie? What if they hurt Jake? I willed myself to think positive thoughts, but the other scenarios still blared through, pushing the happy ending of a deceased Victoria and Laurent out of minds sight.

11:00pm

Suddenly there was a sound of shuddering glass as my window was pulled up. My heart sunk with guilt._ They were here already. They had killed the others and come for me. _I turned in my bundle of blankets to see Jake climb through the small opening. He shut the window quietly before turning to see me bundled up in bed. I was relieved to see him here finally. My heart restarted itself.

"Hey" he said with a smile.

"Hey" Jake chuckled at my voice, muffled by the blankets. He walked over to my bed and leant over my bulging form. I rolled again in the knot of blankets to watch him. Jake looked down at me with amused eyes. "Were you cold?"

I nodded silently. Jake chuckled again and reached out with his hand to move back the sheet covering my face. My skin was met with the cold air of my room. I recoiled reflexively and pulled myself back into the blankets. "No" I said, my voice still muffled "It's cold"

Jake cocked his head thoughtfully, the way he always did and looked down at me. "What if I warm you up? Is that a good compromise for being able to see your beautiful face?"

I nodded eagerly and rolled to the side to make room for Jake.

He lay on the bed beside me and I untucked some of the blanket to engulf him as well. My bare skin touched the cold air for mere moments. I pulled myself across the bed and snuggled into Jake's side. He was miraculously warm. It fascinated me how he was still so overly warm when the temperature was so cold. No doubt he had run here in wolf form. The thick fur would have served its duty, but now as I snuggled close to his warm chest I remembered something that he had told me. When the Quiliettes phased into huge wolves the action was much like exploding. Unfortunately their clothes didn't survive this explosion which meant that when they eventually phased back into humans they didn't have anything to where. I had blushed furiously at the thought of a naked Jacob walking through the woods to my house. However Jake had then told me about how they had learnt to carry a spare pair of shorts with them when they phased into a wolf. It was a nuisance to carry around let alone a whole outfit, therefore he rarely wore shoes or shirts. Apparently denim didn't taste very nice, so instead of carrying the shorts in their mouths they would tie them to their legs after they had phased.

However, the fact that Jake wasn't wearing a shirt didn't bother me even the slightest, especially at this moment in time. I pressed myself to his warm figure, soaking up the heat. I could feel his lithe muscle, every ab defined, every plane sculpted. Jake pulled back the blanket from my face again but this time I didn't protest. He pulled himself up so that he hovered over me. We both lay beneath the blankets, which were now toasty warm due to his heat. He leant in and brushed his warm lips on my temple, down my cheek until he reached my lips. He paused, our lips touching ever so slightly. "Bells?" he asked, quietly, warm breath escaping from his mouth to pass over my skin. I opened my mouth to speak but only managed a tiny "uhuh". My heart was beating so quickly I was sure it was about to explode in my chest. My lips tingled with anticipation as I waited for more. Anything more.

"Are your lips cold?" He asked, looking down at me. I felt myself shiver slightly at the words. I nodded slyly, breathing in his intoxicatingly woodsy scent. His lips danced across mine, pressing slightly but never making full contact. He was teasing me. "Would you like me to warm them up for you?"

"Uh huh" I nodded, trying to move closer to those warm, tantalising lips.

Jake hesitated a moment. A beautiful, wonderful moment. His eyes were full of love and sureness. He was revelling in what he saw. I was mercy at his feet as I lay beneath him. I was breathless and he hadn't even kissed me yet. It was amazing that he could affect me so physically without even touching me. He took a breath before leaning closer to me and meeting my lips.

Although I had kissed Jake before it had never been anything like this. The feeling was more than I had ever expected. His lips were soft and loving, moving against mine in strange new ways. It was both exciting and nerve-wracking. There was a new sense of urgency to the way his lips moved on mine. As his lips worked his hand wandered up my waist, across my shoulder, to grasp the hair at the base of my neck. He held me closer so that every part of me was tingling with warmth.

When we finally parted it was only to breath. My stupid human instincts told me my lungs were empty of oxygen. I could taste our scents mingling together in the air between us as we gasped for air. Jake rolled us so that we lay on our sides beneath the covers. I kept my arms around his waist, pulling him to me.

"Jake" I whispered into his neck "I'm scared"

Jake's arms constricted around me. I could feel every breath, every twitch of his muscles, every movement was echoed through his body and into mine.

"I know" he whispered back, his warm breath trickling down my neck. His fingers played with the hair there, running through the strands and winding them around and around into tight spirals before letting them fall once again. "You don't need to worry. We have everything under control"

"But what if you or one of the others gets hurt?"

"We're not going to get ourselves killed, Bells"

"But, what if..." I left my sentence hanging there.

"What if what?"

"What if you did? It would be my entire fault" I buried my face into his neck, hiding my face. My eyes were watering with emotion.

Jake pulled back and tilted my face up to meet my eyes. A single tear escaped and Jake caught it with his thumb. He caressed my cheek thoughtfully, his gaze attentive and wondrous.

"It would be for a good cause" I shook my head in frustration.

"You don't understand" I wailed. "You can't imagine how I would feel if one of you were hurt because of me"

"Actually, I can"

"What?" I gasped. I was taken aback by his response. Jake sighed and pulled me in for a hug. His hand stayed at the base of my neck, still toying idly with my brown locks.

"I have never experienced it first hand, but due to the wondrous mechanics and workings of the wolf's brain I may as well have"

"What do you mean?"

"Sam" Jake's voice was soft and sad as he whispered to the air next to my ear. "He hurt the ones he loved all because of who he was. We hear about it all the time. He wallows in his own guilt day in and day out. He couldn't control it. There was no way he could have known what was going to happen, it just happened. Just like what we're going through at the moment. You have no control over any of this, so whatever happens, happens and that's just it."

"I'd still feel guilty"

"It may sound insane, but I'm not sure I would, not if you were safe"

Wow, the way he regarded me was ridiculous. I wasn't sure how I felt about him being okay with one of his brothers dying in a fight to save me, so I settled for the obvious comment. "You love me too much"

"More than you know"

I hugged Jake closer, pressing him to me. He did love me, far more than I deserved, and I was grateful for that. There was no way I would have survived this long without him.

"What happened? With Sam, I mean?" Jake let out another sigh before continuing "Do you remember Leah?"

"Harry Clearwater's daughter?" Harry had died of a heart attack not long ago. His passing had come as a huge shock, not only to the immediate family including Sue, Seth and Leah, but also the rest of the Quiliette tribe. Now I knew why. Harry had been one of _them_.

"The very same" Jake said sadly "Well, a few years back Sam and Leah were kind of like a _thing_. You never saw one without the other. Sam was as good as in love with Leah. She relied on his support, he relied on her. Everything was fine, until Leah's cousin came to visit.

"The moment Sam set his eyes on her, he knew. She was the one, his imprint"

"Imprint?" I questioned. The word sounded familiar.

"Everything Sam had ever cared for was worthless now. It was as though his centre of gravity had shifted. Instead of being held to the earth, he was now bound by her. Suddenly, the love he felt for Leah just wasn't enough. He devoted himself to his imprint. There was no way she could resist that. It wasn't either of their faults. Imprinting isn't something you can choose. There is no way to know when it's going to happen, or even_ if_ it's going to happen."

"So Sams imprint is Emily?"

"Correct"

"But then, Emily is Leah's cousin...oh god. That would be horrible. He just left Leah for Emily?"

"Sam wasn't proud of it. He tried to explain to what had happened but Leah got angry. One day she went to face Sam. Sam lost his temper. Unfortunately Emily was standing too close"

I gasped loudly "He phased?"

"Yes"

There was a short pause while I put one and one together "Emily's scars"

"Sam can never take that back. It haunts him to this day. We are always being subjected to his thoughts. It's rather depressing actually"

"Wait. Imprint. I've heard that somewhere before..."

"I'm sure it was nothing" Jake said quickly "It's always being mentioned, especially with the Sam, Emily, Leah triangle."

"No, it definitely meant something" I could recall something dimly in my memory. Then it clicked "Quil mentioned it today"

"Did he?" asked Jake. His voice uncertain "I don't remember"

"Yes" I insisted "He said...I was...oh my gosh" I stopped speaking, my sentence trailing into nothingness. Jake rubbed my back soothingly "Bells"

I pushed on Jake's chest to put some space between us. I met his eyes which seemed cautious and ashamed "I'm your imprint?" I asked quietly. Jake's eyes closed for a second. He swallowed "Yes"

"Why didn't you tell me?"

Jake was quiet. His eyes moved over my face, taking in every minute detail "I wanted you to have the choice, the choice you didn't have with _him. _I was afraid that if I told you, you would feel compelled to be with me. You would have chosen to love me, not of your own free will but because you thought it was the right thing to do. I didn't want that to happen. I needed you to have the choice. And you still do. If you ever feel like maybe you don't love me anymore I want you to leave. Don't stay for my sake. As long as you're happy I'll find a way to survive."

I was speechless. I had no idea what to say so I rolled until I was on top of him. Positioning myself carefully I cupped either side of his face with my hands and leant down. Jake's eyes were wide with anticipation. I smiled as I leant closer. My lips grazed across his chin before meeting his lips. I kissed him lightly "Thankyou, for everything. For a choice. For giving me you." I whispered as I wrapped my arms fully around him. His warm arms encapsulated me once more and held me where I lay.

"My pleasure" he replied, his breath tickling my ear. I could feel his heart beating rhythmically with mine. Each breath came deeply, drawing me upwards, then downwards with each inhalation. I was at peace, completely happy.

We had changed so much. From that first day on the beach when I had been a clumsy girl trying desperately to flirt with a young boy. Jake had taken anything he could get from me, which had been a relief since I was never really sure it was going to work.

Then I had fallen apart after _he_ had left. I had gotten into adrenaline fuelled sports. I was unpredictably wild, always trying to please everyone around me. Charlie, Angela, Mike. Jessica, Eric, even my school teachers. That was until Jake saved me.

"Do you remember the girl with a flirtatious smile, unpredictably wild, always trying to please?"

Jake laughed "Yes, I do. She was a funny one, that girl. Always getting herself into all sorts of trouble"

"Yeah" I sighed before giggling slightly "Now she's shown she has balls by standing up to a pack of werewolves"

"True" Jake laughed again "Although I can't say she's improved much with keeping herself out of trouble. I do believe that being chased by two bloodthirsty creatures is pretty dangerous."

"Well, nobody's perfect" I argued teasingly

"Awwww, I don't know. I can think of someone who comes pretty damn close"

"Oh, really? And who might that be?" I asked innocently, pulling back to look at Jake with my wide brown eyes.

"I'll give you a hint" said Jake softly.

Suddenly he rolled us so that he lay over me, his body pressing to mine lightly while the rest of his body weight was taken by his arms which leant either side of my head.

My breathing had accelerated wildly, not only from the shock of being flipped over but also from the feeling that having him leaning over me like this was giving me. It was new and exciting. His breath washed over my face as I felt my cheeks turn a bright red while I looked up at Jake's face hovering over me.

"She's sweet" he breathed, running a finger gently across my cheek "She's got a wonderful personality. She's funny. And she is far too good looking for her own good."

If possible my cheeks would have turned a darker crimson at those words

"Wow" I said, breathless "I really must meet this 'perfect' girl"

"Oh" said Jake "that's not possible"

"Why not?" I asked, pouting my lips

"Because she has a previous engagement this evening...actually, for all evenings from now on...and mornings...and lunchtimes...and morning teas...and..." I stopped him there. Elevating myself up onto my elbows I managed to capture his lips with mine and he was silenced. After all, we had plenty of time to talk in the nights to come ;)

_Donedy, done, done, done! I hope that was worth it. As you may have noticed, I enjoy my little Jacob/Bella private scenes. I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I do writing them! :) I thought Jake and Bells needed a bit more of an intimate moment since they've gone through so much emotionally. I think I would just want to be close physically after all that...let me know if you disagree._

_Until next time,_

_best wishes,_

_lee-leerose xx_


	18. Be Strong

_Hello my little munchkins :)_

_How have you been? Here's a little treat to make your day (or at least I hope it will :D), the next installment of_ New Soul _is here. Thank you to all those who reviewed the last couple of chapters. We've cracked the big hundie! Woop! woop! You guys are truly amazing people!_

_So, here it is, _Be Strong_, inspired by Delta Goodrem._

_xx_

**Chapter 18: BE STRONG**

It was Wednesday morning. It was only halfway through the school week and I was already dead on my feet. Although I was doing nothing to help my tiredness I still wished that Mr. Banner would hurry up with his Biology lesson. I mean, really, who cared about why terrestrial plants needed a vascular system while aquatic plants did not?

I had my elbows on the desk, my chin resting in my hands, and I wasn't listening to a word the teacher was saying. Instead I was thinking about the last few nights. Truth be told that my lack of concentration this morning could be blamed somewhat on my recent lack of sleep. I had been kept up until the late hours of the morning, of my own free will, by none other than my boyfriend.

He had spent the last week in my room, watching me as I slept, making sure I was safe from any lurking vampires and ensuring I didn't fall subject to one of my nightmares again.

It was because of these sleeping arrangements that I hadn't slept very much. The temptation to stay up late, locking lips with Jake was far too appealing to leave untouched. Therefore night after night I would bid Charlie goodnight before going to bed, and every night without fail Jake would slip through my window at 11:00pm sharp to greet me with his gorgeous smile.

It was lucky that Charlie was such a deep sleeper. I wasn't sure what I'd do if he walked in on us, both under the blankets, me lying on top...All I knew was that it wouldn't end well. Even though Jake and I weren't doing anything more than a girlfriend and boyfriend would be expected to be doing something told me that Charlie wouldn't take it in the best spirits.

I could just imagine Charlie's face turning blank and his eyes widening before his face would turn a bright red, both with anger and embarrassment at what he had just interrupted. He would then proceed to kick Jacob out. How, I didn't know. Would he simply yell and watch as Jake made his own way out of the house? Or would he march straight up to us, pull me off him before grabbing him by his ear and pulling him out of my room with as much force as a police officer could exert on a minor without being charged himself? I really wasn't sure, and I didn't really want to find out. After that I would be presented with the talk of a lifetime. My mother would be informed and I would be banned from seeing Jacob.

As I mentioned before, I really didn't want to find out the exact consequences of our actions.

Contrary to the looming prospect of an angry father it was rather exciting, breaking the rules. There was a certain rush that came every time Jake slid in through my window during the late hours of the night. It was thrill of sorts. It could be compared to the rush one felt when bungee jumping.

The cliff seemed so tall, so intimidating, yet it felt so exhilarating when you took the chance and plunged into the unknown. It was safe enough. You knew the cord would eventually pull tight and you would be stopped from plummeting too far, however, there was always that slight sense of fear. Anything could go wrong, and if it did it could be disastrous, but this only added to the hype and excitement of it all. The thrill was only as big as the risk.

Suddenly I felt something small and light hit me on my arm. "Pssst, Bells" I pulled my thoughts back to the present to find a small ball of paper scrunched up on my desk. It seemed that someone had been trying to get my attention and had resorted to throwing it at me. Looking around to find the culprit I saw that Mike sat at the desk to my left. He was looking pointedly from me to the front of the classroom. I followed his gaze to see that Mr Banner was also looking at me. His expression was far from approving, however, and the way he arched his left eyebrow told me that he knew I wasn't paying attention. I cleared my throat and looked up at him unashamedly.

"Isabella" he said, his tone showing he was clearly annoyed at my lack of interest in his lesson.

"Just Bella, sir" I corrected him.

"Of course" He said lazily "Well Bella, do you care to join us in this class or would you prefer to continue daydreaming?"

The truthful answer to that question would have been the latter. However I restrained myself and answered "Sorry Sir"

"Don't let it happen again Miss Swan, or it's the principal's office for you"

"Yes, Mr. Banner" I said quietly, ducking my head slightly.

Mr. Banner nodded at me once before resuming his teaching. I glanced at Mike and mouthed a quick "thanks". He smiled back, his bright blue eyes gleaming at my appreciation.

...

After the bell rang the class let out a sigh of relief. It turns out I wasn't the only one half asleep in Biology. As everyone trailed out of class Mike managed to catch up to me in the crowd as we headed to the canteen for recess.

"Bellaaa" He called, running slightly to catch up to me.

"Hey Mike" I really wasn't in the mood to talk at the moment, especially not with Mike.

"How are you?"

"Alright" I decided to keep conversation short in an attempt to get away.

"That's good..." said Mike, obviously not put off by my not asking him how he was.

"You were pretty out of it in Biology." He continued, trying to match my quickening stride as I headed in the direction of the canteen. "What were you thinking about anyway?"

"Um, Mike?" I asked tentatively "I'm really hungry. Couldn't we hurry to the canteen?"

Mike shrugged. "Sure"

When we walked through the swinging cafeteria doors into the food hall I was glad to be met with the uproar that break time usually induced in my fellow high school students. The loud bangs, crashes, high pitched screams, chattering voices and bellowing yells made it very difficult for Mike to speak to me, and gave me the perfect excuse to feign that I couldn't hear him.

I made my way around the crowded lunch tables to the island bench located at the front of the hall. It was piled with today's choice of recess, sausage rolls and party pies. Not really in the mood for hot food I took an apple from the bowl of fruit that was also on offer and walked to our regular spot.

Our table was almost full, spare two chairs for Mike and I. Angela and Eric sat next to each other holding hands and whispering quietly. Next to them sat Jessica, alone and friendless in the company of the two lovebirds. I walked quickly to choose the seat next to Angela. Even though she was in deep thought with Eric it was better than being subjected to Jessica's snobby comments (she had never really forgiven me for my months of dormancy).

Mike followed me and sat to my left, which also happened to be Jessica's right. He placed his tray on the table in front of him then shifted his seat slightly so that it angled away from her to face me. "So" He spoke, clasping his hands together in his lap "What _were _you daydreaming about in Biology?"

"Daydreaming?" Jessica scoffed from behind Mike. She was leaning forwards in her seat, trying to butt her head into the conversation, which was being made difficult by the angle of Mike's chair.

"Yea" said Mike, not bothering to look as Jessica, but instead keeping his eyes fixed on me.

"Nothing in particular" I said, trying to keep my voice sounding offhand. Apparently it didn't work very well because the next minute Jessica cooed "Ooooh. Bella's got a boyfriend" in a sort of childish sing-song voice.

"Really?" Mike turned quickly to face Jess. "Why would you say a thing like that?"

Jessica rolled her eyes and sat up to show her superiority. "Can't you tell? You can hear it in the way she talks. You can see it in the way she sits. You can even tell by the way her thumb strokes her other hand as though she's comforting herself. It's because_ he's _not here to do it for her". She flipped her hair over her shoulder in a definitive manner and battered her eyelashes obviously at Mike. I supposed that Jessica Stanly had never been one for subtlety, and you couldn't really expect her to start now.

Mike turned back to me, his eyes wide and disbelieving. "Is that true?" he asked loudly.

I nodded.

"Who?" He demanded, equally as loudly.

I paused, knowing I was wading in dangerous waters. After a short moment I decided I didn't care what Mike or anyone else would think. I was proud of my boyfriend and it was about time that Mike got it through his thick skull that I was taken "Do you remember Jacob Black, from that night we went to the cinema?"

Mike's eyes flared "Yes" he said through gritted teeth

"Well, a few weeks ago he asked me out."

"And...?" said Mike, waiting on edge of his chair for the response that would either make his day, or break his heart.

"I accepted" I couldn't help but feel sorry for Mike then. His eyes were void of hope and his mouth hung open limply.

"Ha! See!" Said Jessica loudly, slamming her hands down on the table.

Jessica's actions seemed to pull Angela and Eric back to the present. They turned to face the rest of us, a look of surprise plastered on their faces as though they had only just realised that they weren't the only ones here.

"What did I miss?" asked Angela, her cheeks showing a tint of red.

Jessica sighed dramatically "Bella's got a boyfriend" she said knowingly.

"Oh, yay!" exclaimed Angela, smiling wildly. That was what I loved about Angela. She was so genuine. Nothing about her was faked or feigned. She never hid her feelings and was herself no matter what.

I grinned back at Angela,

"How long has this been going on?" she asked

"A few weeks"

"Ooooh, goodie" she squealed "Who's the lucky boy?"

I could feel Mike beside me. His dejected feelings were penetrating through me as though I was made of sponge, absorbing it all. "Um, Jacob Black" I said, trying to keep my mind clear.

With Mike's sulking and Angela's screaming my ego was taking a bipolar hit. Angela squealed some more. "Oh Gosh, This is so exciting!" she said, bobbing up and down in her chair. "Isn't it great Eric?" She asked, turning to ask her boyfriend. Eric looked up from his food, pulled his lips into a fake smile, and then said "Yeah" in the most excited voice he could muster.

I ducked my head slightly as Angela moved on to question me.

"Actually Angela, I'd prefer not to answer any more questions today. I've already had plenty." I sent a sidelong glance to Mike, who had fallen unusually silent during the conversation.

"Only a few" pleaded Angela, her eyes wide. How could I resist that face?

"Alright" I sighed in defeat "But only a few"

Angela clapped her hands with excitement and began her questioning.

I felt as though I was being interrogated for a crime. She asked every possible question of me. How old is he? Where does he live? Where have we been? What did we do? Does my dad know? Does my mum know? Does he have a clean record? Does he have a good _dating_ record? The extensive questioning went on and on. Every so often my answers, short as they were, would be penetrated with the excited words and short squeals made by Angela. This carried on until I couldn't take it anymore.

"Ange" I said "I think I've reached my quota for today"

Angela's face fell but Eric, sensing her disappointment; lay a hand on her shoulder. Angela looked at him. He gave her a meaningful look and smiled. "I guess you're right" she sighed "But promise to keep me updated"

"I promise" I laughed as Angela stood up, pushing her seat back as she did so, and pulled Eric out of the Canteen.

Just then, the bell rang.

It was only 3rd period, English. This was going to be a very long day

...

That night I lay in bed, waiting for Jake.

I was slightly nervous, my tummy felt as though butterflies were fluttering through it, tickling me. It was an uncomfortable feeling.

It was 11:46pm and Jake was late. This wasn't normal. He always climbed through my window at exactly 11 o'clock. Instinctively I knew that something was wrong.

Getting up from my bed I made my way to my window. As I peered outside I could see the trees. They were abnormally still and unmoving in the silent night. Nothing was moving, not a bird, a prowling cat, or even a wolf. I examined the forest carefully, hoping to catch a glimpse of a tail or a pair of yellow glowing eyes staring back at me from the darkness. But alas there was no sign that anyone, or any_thing_ for that matter, was keeping guard of me tonight. That could only mean one thing. Victoria and Laurent were here.

I pulled the latch on my window shut tightly, locking it, and pulled the blinds shut before stepping back slowly. I didn't make a noise as I crept across my room to my bedroom door. Grabbing my chair from my desk I shoved it beneath the doorhandle in an attempt to put off any late night visitors.

I slid back into my bed, my heart thumping loudly in my chest. I willed for it to silence itself. Surely they could hear it, wherever they were. They would know where I was in an instant. They would come to get me. Charlie was sleeping in the other room. Would they go for him first, or would they put me out of my misery first?

There were so many possibilities for death. I had faced it so many times before, yet somehow this seemed more prominent. There was one time, when I was young when I had felt so close to death, I could taste it. I had been riding my bike. I loved it so much and always wanted to go faster. I remember zooming so fast down the hill that I felt as light as air. My father was on the bike next to me, racing me to the bottom. He lowered his body to streamline himself. As he zoomed faster I decided to streamline myself as well. I lowered my head to the level of the handlebars and felt the speed of the bike pick up beneath me. However, my shift in body weight had put me off my steering. I began to swerve, the whole bike shaking beneath me. Not thinking properly I forgot about the handbrakes and instead attempted to stop the bike with my feet. My bike swerved madly and suddenly I was bucked off, my tiny body flying across the handlebars and onto the ground beneath me. I hit the earth with a thump. All the air was squeezed out of my chest as I lay there, unable to breathe. My dad had seen what had happened and quickly stopped his own bike dropped it where he stood and ran to me. I had rolled myself onto my back and was gasping for air. Something in my chest resisted any attempt I made to suck in oxygen. My vision became hazy as I let out my last puff of air. My dad was anxious, unsure of what was happening "Bella! Bella, are you okay?" he shook my shoulders roughly, trying to pull me out of my stupor. I squeezed my eyes shut, and opened them once more, trying desperately to speak. I coughed. Once. Twice. Then I breathed, sucking in a lungful of air as the pressure on my chest relented.

That was the first time I had felt so helpless, unable to breathe, unable to live. The moment lasted so long, drawn out in my mind so that I could relive every part. The next moment of imminent death hadn't been that long ago. My running in with James had definitely been a life or death situation. I had contemplated how it would feel to die. I thought it would be worth it if I died in the place of someone I loved. Of course, at that point in time I had believed that James had my mother captive in my old ballet studio.

After _he_ had saved me, my life had been filled with life or death situations. I guess it was inevitable to have to face death every day when you hung out with a family of vampires. I hadn't thought anything of it however, and until that last day I didn't realise how deeply they could actually hurt me. It was then that I faced death again.

When _they_ left I was not hurt physically, but emotionally. I had been ripped apart from the inside out and was damaged beyond repair. The memories still haunted me. I had faced death every day for the next few months, just living out life (if that was what my zombie phase could be called) day-by-day.

Jake had saved me from death, and now I was facing it yet again. Victoria and Laurent wanted my blood. They wanted me dead. I was balancing on a fine wire, tipping from side to side, the scales of life or death moving tediously beneath me. Surely this time I had run out of luck. I had lived through so much, maybe this was my time.

I could feel myself shaking beneath the covers, not from the cold, but the uncertainty of what was to come. I pulled my legs up to my chest and tried to breathe in deeply. My shuddering chest sucked the air in unevenly.

_Calm down _I told myself angrily _They'll hear you. Do you want them to come?_

Eventually my breathing evened out, my heartbeat subsided into a slow pulse.

Suddenly I heard something. A twig snapped outside. I could hear the scraping of something on the window. A long fingernail screeched across the pane as I lay there in fear. _This is it. My time is up. I am going to die._

_OOOOHHHH! Left you hanging there. Please review. Let me know what you think is going to happen next XD_

_Love and best wishes,_

_Lee-leerose xx_


	19. Fragile

_Good morning everybody!_

_I hope you enjoyed the cliffhanger I left you with last time :)_

_You all had such interesting ideas about who was at the window. Now, we discover who it really is, Victoria, Laurent, Jacob, Embry, Quil? Only reading this chapter will tell :)_

_Enjoy,_

_lee-leerose xx_

**Chapter 19: FRAGILE**

**(A song by Delta Goodrem)**

**BPOV**

I was a mouse, a tiny quiet mouse hiding in its mouse hole, too scared to come out. But no, that wouldn't do. A mouse could move, and once it took the chance to run the cat would pounce.

I was a rock. A pebble on the beach waiting for the next wave to hit me. Rocking with the tide, never moving, only _being_ moved by the forces around me. But no, that wouldn't do either. A rock could be seen. It could be picked up and thrown into the deep water without being able to do a thing about it.

I was a sheet of glass. A pane in the window, invisible unless you knew it was there. I wasn't moving. I wasn't making a sound. I was just there, waiting as time passed me by. My invisibility meant that to the untrained eye I wouldn't be seen.

Unfortunately, somebody knew I was there. They could see past my invisibility, immobility and silence. They knew where I was and had come to get me.

I could hear the window shuddering as my late night visitor attempted to pry it open. The lock rattled with each shove against the pane. I gave up on silencing my jittering heart and instead focused on remaining as still as possible, willing myself to be somewhere, anywhere else. I squeezed my eyes shut and clenched my fists. I could feel my nails digging into my sweaty palms as I gulped a lungful of air.

I heard a thump outside. The window stopped shuddering and I realised they were gone. The silence pressed in on me, making my room seem small and claustrophobic. I was confused. Surely they wouldn't give up that easily.

Waiting was painful. I couldn't imagine what they might be doing. Were they playing with me? Were they going for Charlie first? Maybe they had given up altogether. My brain couldn't take it anymore. The blood pumping through my veins echoed loudly in my head, making me feel dizzy and out of control.

It was then that I heard the creak of the floorboards outside my room. They were in the house, outside my door.

I squeezed my eyes shut even tighter as I heard the doorhandle squeak slightly in protest to the jostling it was now receiving. I could hear the chair that I had jammed under the handle scrape across the floor as the doorknob broke free of its constraints. The hinges of the door squeaked silently as it swung open. A breeze tickled my face.

I kept my eyes shut, not wanting to see her bright red hair or those thirsty crimson eyes. I knew she wouldn't be the worst thing I'd experience. At the sight of her pale, marble skin I would be reminded of _him_, of _them_. As if laying on my deathbed wasn't enough, it seemed like overkill for my last thoughts to be of the pain _he_'d put me through.

I didn't want to know what was coming, but whatever it was I wished she would do it quickly. I wished that she would spare me the pain and torture.

I had expected to feel more in my last moments. Perhaps the fear had allowed me to succumb to my imagination. Maybe I had really become that mouse, rock, or window pane. Was it possible that they couldn't see me? Had I really become invisible?

I'm not sure what I expected to feel. All those stories about your whole life flashing before your eyes seemed silly as I lay there, unwilling to think, not wanting to remember. My brain was stuck in the here and now. Anything that had happened before now was wiped clean from my mind. I was consumed with the idea of her leaning over me, drinking my scent from the air. I worried about what would happen after. Would she turn on Charlie? Would Jake try to avenge my death? Would she kill him as well? These were the thoughts that consumed me as I felt the intruder's presence move into the room.

I could feel a hand press into the mattress. She leant over me, her breath caressing my face. I shivered slightly from the difference in temperature. It was warm and cleansing, much more so than my own body temperature.

A well known scent filled the air around me. Wait, _warm_? I felt a hand come to my face, warm fingers trailed across my temple. Again, the temperature confused me.

From memory she should have been cold. Her skin should have been as hard as stone. None of this made sense. Her hands were meant to be hard and smooth, but instead I felt soft skin gliding over my cheekbone and back past my hairline. The intruder ran its hand through my hair. My visitor was being rather gentle. If they had come to kill me, they were definitely drawing my death out.

This was too much. My mind felt as though the cogs had stuck. I was stunned. This was not what I had expected at all. My confused mind whirred aimlessly trying to comprehend what it was thinking and what I was feeling. That was until I heard my name being called "Bella". His familiar voice broke through the silent room. My eyes flew open, taking in the sight of him leaning over me, his eyes concerned, his hair windswept. "Jake" I gasped. I reached up. I was no longer a quiet mouse, an unmoving rock or a transparent window. I was Bella, and this was my Jake.

...

**JPOV**

When I entered the room she was laying there, unmoving. At first I thought they'd beat me here. Maybe they'd lead us on a false trail. She could have been dead. I would've believed she was if it weren't for the infrequent rise and fall of her chest. The tiny, minute movement made me sigh with relief as I moved towards her across the room.

She must have worked out that something had happened. By the way the window was jammed shut, and the chair had barricaded the door I knew she was scared.

All I wanted to see now were those beautiful eyes. They were my path to her soul. I could tell everything by those brown orbs. They told a story, whether she was happy, sad, confused or angry. I knew that now they would be filled with fear. It must be horrible for her to have to wait. Every moment would feel like your last.

I leant one hand on the mattress beside her. My hand sunk into the blankets, but Bella didn't move. Her eyes seemed to scrunch more tightly and her nails dug their way into her palms forcefully. I reached a hand out to touch her skin. She still didn't move.

As still as a statue Bella lay there as I moved my hand back into her hair, gently pulling through the knots. "Bella" I said softly._ Look at me. _ As if by magic her eyes opened.

She seemed surprised for a moment. Her pupils dilated as her eyes adjusted themselves to the dark. "Jake" she gasped as she reached up to touch my face. Her hand moved fluidly across my cheek and down my neck to my shoulder. She ran a finger along my collar bone as I looked at her. She was so amazingly beautiful. Her brown eyes glistened in the dim darkness of the room.

Bella met my eyes and moved to the side to make room for me. I pulled back the covers and slid in alongside her. She snuggled into my chest, wrapping her arms around me. I wrapped mine around her in turn.

"What happened?" she whispered into my chest.

"There was some trouble at the border" I said truthfully. Bella shivered in my arms "Paul was on duty when he caught a whiff of the bloodsuckers. He sent a telepathic message back to Seth, who then told Sam. Sam rallied the group and we set out to fight."

"You know" Bella's spoke quietly, her voice muffled as she spoke into my chest. "Somehow I knew there was something wrong. I knew the only thing that could stop you from seeing me would be a fight" Her voice was so calm, yet her shaking body said otherwise. I couldn't understand the mix of emotions running through her.

"I didn't want to go" I confided "If I could have stayed with you I would have. The only thing that kept me from racing back here was knowing that while I was fighting them they couldn't hurt you"

Bella sighed in my arms "So, did you catch them?" she asked, a slight edge of anxiousness to her voice.

"No" I said. I could feel her muscles tighten at the thought that the threat was still imminent "They had been prowling the edges of Forks, but as soon as we got close enough they took off. They were too fast. They seemed to know we were there. We followed them, but lost them in the forests leading to Port Angeles. As soon as they were out of sight I ran back here as fast as I could. I didn't want to chance them turning around to come back to get you, my unguarded Bella."

Bella sucked in a deep breath. "So nobody fought?"

"No" Bella let out her breath all at once. She was relieved. Knowing her, she had probably been beating herself up about the vampires hurting _us_ while we protected _her_. She was such a masochist, my Bella, but I had to put her straight.

"Bells, if anything happens to me during this whole ordeal, or to anyone else for that matter, it's not your fault" Bella moved her indignant eyes up to meet mine

"Of course it is. You're only putting yourselves in danger because of_ me_"

I sighed inwardly. She honestly had no idea how much my life depended on her safety. "Bells, we are protecting you, not because it's our duty, although that does come into play, but because I love you and I need you. If anything were to happen to you I wouldn't be able to go on. I would ensure that my life would finish very soon after yours."

Bella looked stunned. She was a statue, unmoving and unbreathing. "Breathe, Bells" I reminded her gently. She took a shuddering breath and looked up at me, angry and confused.

"You couldn't Jake. I won't let you"

I laughed darkly and pointed out the obvious "You wouldn't know Bella. No one would need to know. I would do it swiftly and quietly."

To my astonishment tears started to form in the corner of Bella's eyes. They welled there until finally she blinked and they began to trail down her cheeks. The wet streaks pained me.

"I'm sorry Bella. I shouldn't have told you that" I held her tightly to me. Her face pressed into my chest, her tears fell on my bare skin. The coolness of each drop evaporated quickly on the heat of my body.

"Tell me what I can do to make it better" I pleaded with her, unable to endure her sadness.

"Promise me" she choked out through her tears. Her fists thumped my chest lightly. She was frustrated. "You won't do such a stupid thing. I'm not worth it"

As soon as I opened my mouth to argue the point she shushed me by placing a single finger on my lips "No. If you love me as much as I think you do, you'll do this for me."

I gazed down at Bella sadly. "Think of it this way" she said "If the situation were reversed would you want me to go off my rocker if you passed before me?"

I growled at the idea and held her body tighter to mine. There could never be a world without her. It wouldn't make sense. If I died everything would find its way into balance. But _Bella_. If she passed, I couldn't even imagine how the world would right itself. I knew what she meant now. She seemed to read my change of expression and continued "Exactly, can't you see how guilty I would feel, in either situation. If I passed first I would feel guilt for your death. If you passed first I would feel guilty for taking the life you died trying to save."

I took a deep breath and gazed down at her. "I'm Sorry" I repeated. It was the best I could do.

"Do you promise?"

"Yes"

"Thankyou" Bella took a moment to readjust herself to fit her body more snugly to mine. "I love you" she said.

"To the moon and back, forever and ever" I promised. With a kiss to her forehead I could feel her slowly succumbing to sleep.

_La la la la laaaah done! :)_

_NOTE: SLIGHT SPOILERS IN THE UPCOMING A/N_

_Now, I know what you're thinking 'this chick has no ideas of her own. I mean, Victoria and Port Angeles. Come on!' _

_I would like to point out here and now that this fanfic is based on the books. It is what would have happened had Jake taken Edward's place in Bella's life. Therefore characters such as Victoria and Laurent will still go through the same motions as in the books. However, situations will change, such as the fact that Laurent will not die in the same circumstances (as Bella has no need to go to the meadow now she has Jake, and hence the wolves will not be able to kill him then), so therefore Victoria will have Laurent and not Riley. _

_The next thing, because this is based on the books I have tried to add my own flare when I can. Hence the BXJ moments and general fluffy scenes._

_Also, I realise the tone was a little depressing for this chapter. Hard times have just come around again and I find it easier to deal with it all if I use writing as a way to vent my feelings. It's helpful to put a character through something traumatic and then find that even if it seems impossible for them to escape there really is light at the end of the tunnel. I'm not really sure if this makes sense, but it makes me stronger by believing that maybe I can be like Bella and Jake and find a way through the mess we like to call 'life'._

_And also I have just noticed I've stuffed up the numbering of my chapters. Oh well, just as long as you can still read and make sense of them._

_So that's all for my little author's __spiel. Please give me feedback. It is much appreciated and I love to chat with my readers :)_

_Hope you are enjoying the story,_

_until our next chapter together (which should be soon!)_

_love and best wishes,_

_lee-leerose xx_


	20. Straight Through My Heart

_**ta dah! Here's the new chapter. How good am I? :)**_

_**Thanks to those who reviewed the last one. I have been doing quite badly at school lately and your reviews were really great "pick-me-ups" .**_

_**Now, just a quick note for the next few weeks. My dad is going away on a 8 weeks work trip so I will be at mum's. However, this means limited internet and computer access, therefore less writing and uploading time :( I promise you I will try to update when I can, but it will be hard.**_

_**Enjoy this chapter, we're getting into the steam of the story now :) It does change around a bit with the POV but just stay with me and it'll work out in the end.**_

_**lee-leerose xx**_

**Chapter 20: Straight through my heart**

**Backstreet Boys **

It had been three days since the sighting of Victoria and Laurent, and other than Jake's persistent worrying and the increased coverage of the town border by the wolves nothing particularly thrilling had happened (spare the heated kissing that went on in my bedroom late at night)

Being a Sunday evening Jake should have been with me. He never gave up a chance to see me if he could help it. However, Sam had called all the wolves together for a meeting to discuss tactics for killing the vampires.

Sam had decided that if we were to have any chance of getting rid of these vampires we needed to have a game plan. It wasn't enough to just go rushing into such a dangerous situation and hope for the best. Sam said that he didn't want to take the risk of one of his boys coming home hurt, or worse, not coming home at all.

This news, although annoying due to the fact that it cut into my time with Jacob, came as a relief. I felt as though a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. When the fight finally happened I could sit safely at home with the knowledge that the pack knew what they were doing and that the chance of them being hurt was lessened somewhat.

Jake had left me unwillingly. "I love you" he had whispered to me, kissing my forehead before jumping gracefully out my window. His feet had hit the ground with a soft thump, he had craned his neck to give me one last smile, then he'd run off into the forest.

His last sentence echoed in my mind. Those were the three words I cherished the most and would never get sick of hearing. It meant so much to hear him say it to me. Those words had hurt me before. They had lost their meaning once _he _left, but now they were significant once again. I could tell when he spoke to me that they came from the heart. It made me feel wanted and needed, but most importantly he made me feel loved.

I stood up from where I had been sitting at the kitchen table and took my bowl full of now soggy cereal to the bin. I scraped out the claggy mess and rinsed it in the sink before I heard my dad walk into the room. His sneakers squeaked on the tiled floor as he dragged himself to the table and plopped himself down on the seat with a loud sigh. "Morning dad" I greeted.

Charlie looked up at me with tired eyes. He had been out on patrol all night. Apparently someone had been seen speeding at astonishing speeds in the town just across from us. They were last seen heading for Forks and my dad, being the chief police officer had been called upon to catch the law deifier. He had spent his night prowling the streets, looking for the car that had been described for him.

"No luck?" I asked. Charlie sighed again and leant his face in his hand. He rubbed his eyes with his thumb and forefinger before bringing his fingers to pinch the bridge of his nose slightly. I recognized this routine. He was frustrated and tired.

"No" he answered finally. His voice was rough "I drove around the streets all night. There wasn't anything that looked vaguely like what the woman described to me on the phone."

"Oh no. That's no good" I sympathised. "I was about to go for a walk but I take it that you need a caffeine fix first" I said, filling the kettle and sticking it on to boil.

"Thanks Bells- I guess that's the way it is sometimes" He spoke drearily "Life's not all fun and games, especially when it comes to the law."

I nodded in agreement.

I knew Charlie took his position very seriously. He saw himself as the guardian off all things good and pure in Forks. And when you were in such a small town, like ours, it was even more important that the law be kept under supervision. The way he saw it, any slip ups could cause a domino effect and soon enough the whole town could be defying the very rules that he had put down to keep us safe.

"Anyway, I'm sure my time can be better served at the moment" He continued. I remained silent and reached for the now boiling kettle. "There's been a couple of disappearances in Port Angeles" he stated grimly.

"Really?" I asked, suddenly interested.

Charlie nodded and pointed to the paper that lay open on the table "Two teenagers. A boy and girl, around your age. They've been missing for a few days now. No one knows where they've gone. It's like they've simply disappeared"

My hands shook slightly as I poured hot water into two mugs. _My age _It was scary to think that somewhere out there children, no, not children, teenagers, were being picked off the streets and taken away. Their families must be devastated. I couldn't imagine something so horrible happening in the small town of forks. However, it came to mind that Port Angeles wasn't that far away from Forks and that these things were just as likely to happen here as there.

I proceeded to carry the cups of coffee to the table, silently trembling. My hands were shaking so much that small ripples echoed across the surface of the hot liquid. Then, being the klutz I was I managed to trip over my own two feet and stumbled slightly. This caused the coffee in one mug to tip dangerously close to the rim. I moved quickly, readjusting the cup but tipping the other. Hot coffee spilt on my hand and I reflexively let go. The mug smashed to bits as soon as it hit the tiled floor.

I could feel tears pooling in the corner of my eyes as I knelt to tidy the mess. "You okay Bells?" Charlie asked, worriedly. He got up from the table and bobbed down next to where I was crouched over the sticky mess of coffee and china. "Yea, fine" I sniffed, holding back the tears which were a mix of fear, sadness and insecurity. I attempted to pick up the larger pieces of the broken mug but Charlie grabbed my hand, making me let go. His touch was gentle as he examined the now red patch of skin where the hot liquid had spilt. "Bells, you need to run that under cold water, now" His voice was definite and I knew there was no arguing. He was in his element, both as a policeman and a father.

I sniffed again as the tears began to overwhelm me and stood, quickly wiping them away with the back of my good hand as I walked to the sink. I ran the cold water and shoved my burning hot hand beneath the stream. Instead of the pain I had expected I felt the blotchy area begin to tingle. After a few moments I turned off the tap and wrapped my hand in the ice pack Charlie had ready for me.

"Thanks" I said quietly.

It seemed at through Charlie's moment of glory was wearing off. He began to shuffle his feet nervously and swallowed loudly. "You okay Bells?" He asked for the second time in the last few minutes

"Yea" I lied

"Sure?" he asked, unconvinced.

"Well" I started, knowing Charlie wasn't one fore emotional spiels. "It's scary to think that there are people out there who take innocent kids away from their families."

Charlie nodded grimly "Yes. Society's not what it used to be - you can't trust anyone anymore"

"No" I agreed "You can't" I pressed the cold pack closer to my hand, trying to absorb as much of the cold as possible before pulling it away. The area where the coffee had spilt was pink and tingly.

"I think I'm good now dad thanks" I handed the ice pack back to him, trying hard to show him my gratitude with a smile. "I'm gonna go on my walk now"

Charlie raised an eyebrow at me "Even after that?"

"I need to clear my head and the cool air should help" I said, gesturing to my burnt hand.

"Alright. Be careful"

"Always am" I said, quoting him as I walked out the door.

...

The streets were quiet, more so than usual. I've had to have walked this road more than ten times during my walk today. The neighbours must have been confused as to why a girl would want to do such a thing. Some may have thought it boring - walking the same circuit, over and over. However, I found it calming. There was something about the way my feet hit the pavement rhythmically, creating its own beat that was pleasant to the mind. Everything seemed so simple. There was just the road and I, working together in harmony.

The sky was beautiful this evening. The sun had sunk low on the horizon as I had walked from one side of town to the other. I was circling the same couple of blocks of houses now, watching as the clouds turned a dusty red with pink and purple tinges streaked throughout. My hand ached slightly with each pass of the evening breeze. It tickled my skin and irritated the pinkish blotch now spanning from my wrist to my forefinger. I touched it gingerly, gasping at the strange smooth texture. The sun played across the shiny surface making it seem even more unreal.

Thinking I would start heading back home I took a left and walked at double speed a few blocks before taking the first left at the roundabout. The sun slipped behind the trees just as I reached our part of town. The streetlights flickered on, adding an eerie feel to the deserted street. I kept walking, knowing Charlie would be angry if I walked in the dark, especially after the news he'd received from Port Angeles.

My pace picked up slightly as I pressed on. It was becoming colder and my short sleeved shirt and three quarter pants were not very warm at all. I took the next right, then left and found myself on a familiar street. My house should be on the 2nd street on the right.

It was pitch dark I passed the neighbours houses, moving swiftly along the path. I heard a rustling to my right and turned to see what it was. I jumped slightly when a huge dog jumped against the fence, pounding its paws against the wood and barking loudly.

I backed away silently, keeping my eyes locked on the house where the dog kept barking insistently. I felt my foot catch on something and felt my knees give slightly as I stumbled back into the dark. Suddenly a bright light filled the small space and I was able to right myself before I fell to the ground. I could feel rocks poking through the rubber soles of my sneakers and realised that I must have veered off the footpath and onto the dirt track that served as an extra access drive for vehicles to reach their homes.

The light seemed to be coming from down the drive. I covered my eyes, holding up my hand to block the source from sight. As suddenly as it had come, the lights flicked off, leaving me in a daze. Large bright spots seemed to be burnt into my eyes. I blinked wildly, trying to clear my vision as I looked around. I squinted into the darkness, feeling the presence of someone in the shadows ahead.

I could just make out a slight shine, sparkling in the darkness. The silvery colour smouldered in the shadows, however it was still discernable. I could see the faint outline of a bonnet and window. The object was large and streamlined. I gasped as I realised it was a car.

I stepped back in astonishment, shocked by what was happening. The silver car seemed so familiar. It was as like a memory from a dream, a nightmare. Slowly but surely I made out the brand of the logo stuck on the front of the hood. The shining silver circle drew memories from my mind. Its arrow and innocent name scrawled across the middle were enough to send my mind ablaze.

It was then that I turned and ran. I ran back the way I had come. The dog was still barking crazily but I didn't care. My legs didn't stop beneath me until I reached the trees far from our house.

If it really was _them_ I couldn't risk going back to my house. _They_ knew where I lived. I leant my back against the closest tree trunk and felt my body collapse with fatigue. I shivered at the contact of my exposed skin with the cold ground. Pulling my legs to my chest, I sat there rocking back and forth, wondering what to do. I couldn't go back. The car might find me again. So I decided to stay where I was. I leant my head back and clung tightly to my knees to keep my body warm.

As I leant against the tree I thought about all the reasons I had run away from the car, from that tiny silver Volvo. I began to tremble as the nightmares returned, though this time they were a lot more realistic.

...

_**JPOV**_

I let out a loud sigh as I walked in the door. It had been a long day full of heated discussions and close-to phases. I dropped my backpack at the door and sauntered down the hall. "That you Jake?" came my Father's voice from the kitchen.

"Yea" I said as I entered.

Dad was sitting by the phone, his expression grim. "What is it?" I asked, my stomach sinking. I couldn't help but feel as though something bad had happened.

"It's Bella" he said simply. I stopped in my tracks, by heart racing at the thought that something had happened to my one and only.

"What happened?" I asked urgently, forcing my voice to remain calm, but not able to control my volume as it grew to a near-yell. I could feel my hands begin to shake and stuffed them deep into my pockets to hide it from my dad.

"Charlie's been calling constantly for the last hour or so. Bella went for a walk this afternoon but didn't return home. Charlie started to worry when it turned dark. He's worried something might have happened to her. He was asking if she was here or if you had seen her"

"I haven't seen her" I said roughly "I was at a stupid meeting with the others. I should have been with her" I turned away from my father, not wanting him to see the obvious anger and self loathing in my watery eyes. Giving up on hiding my shaking hands I pulled them out of my pockets and moved them to hold onto my thrumming head.

Blood pumped loudly in my ears. I bit my lip and grabbed my hair with my hands, pulling as though hurting myself would make everything better. It would put some reason to my shame. But then I realised that I had to _do_ something. Bella was in trouble and I was standing there doing nothing. "I shouldn't be here" I said to my dad, taking my hands from my hair to open the pantry door. I searched through the various containers and in a moment I found it hidden behind a packet of self raising flour. Our emergency torch. I knew it would come in handy one day, if not for helping in the case of a black out, then for finding Bella.

"Did he say where she was headed?" I asked as I turned to leave, torch in hand.

"Charlie wasn't sure" dad replied to my back "but he thinks she would have had the sense to start walking back home so he's hoping she's somewhere in the area. He's driving the streets now and he's got the other cops out on the roads a bit further out looking for her"

"Thanks dad" I said as I left the room and half ran down the hall.

I wasn't sure, but in that moment when I opened the door and stepped outside I could have sworn I heard him whisper "Bring her home, son".

...

It was cold on the streets, even for a wolf like me. I couldn't imagine what Bella must be feeling, out here. The wind was relentless, whipping at my sides as I ran along the streets of Forks calling her name. I couldn't chance phasing, not when there was such a high chance that I could be seen by one of the neighbours. I didn't want people to start asking questions. The last thing this town needed was gossip about overly large, stalkerish wolves which prowled the streets at night.

I jogged past the park and shops, wondering where on earth she could be. I took a left, then a right, and another left. Things seemed hopeless but she was out here somewhere and I had to find her.

I stopped on the corner to choose my next turn; left, or right? However, I was put off making this decision by the scent that now passed my nose. _No. It couldn't be. _There was a sickly sweet scent mingling with the smell of burnt rubber and exhaust fumes. I chose to turn right and hurried along, running faster and faster. I had to find her, before _he _did.

...

_**BPOV**_

It was so cold. I was frozen in my position, unable to move and unable to think. I had lost track of time. I had no idea how long I had been out there for. It could have been days, weeks even, and I wouldn't have known the difference.

I couldn't hear myself think from the pain of the cold. It was as though it had not only numbed my body, but also my brain. I was stuck, and I needed help to get out.

...

_**JPOV**_

I caught her scent not far down the road where I had detected the horrible sickly sweet aroma. I ran, sprinting down street after street, following a trail of scent only noticeable by those with heightened senses. It was like a breadcrumb trail, left by the frightened and weak who needed saving. The only ones that could help them were those who noticed the trail and who cared enough to follow.

I cared. I cared more about Bella than about any other being in the whole world. It wasn't just that she was my imprint, although that was a large reason for why I felt so protective of her, but also because she was my best friend. I had known her since we were so young it was impossible to think of having a life without her. I couldn't let her down. I had promised myself that I would be whatever Bella needed at each point in her life; a friend, a boyfriend, a saviour, a shoulder to cry on. Now she needed me more than ever, no doubt for all of the above and I was determined to keep my word.

Eventually the trail led me to the edge of the forest. I didn't hesitate as I bashed through the low hanging braches, pushing them back with vigour as I called her name again and again.

It was them that I heard it, a tiny whimper. "Jake". It was nothing more than a whisper on the wind but it was then that I knew I was close. Using my hearing as my eyes I let myself be drawn to the source, following the delicious trail of her scent, which was growing stronger with each step into the trees.

I rounded a tree and breathed a sigh of relief when I saw her, curled into a tight ball, leaning against a tree trunk. She was shivering madly. Now that I was closer I could hear every noise. Her breath was uneven, escaping her frozen lips in small hard puffs. I took a few large steps and was finally beside her. I wrapped her frozen body in my arms and held her close to me. There was no way I was ever letting go.

...

_**BPOV**_

I could feel warm arms constrict around me, warming me to the core. "Jake?" I asked, my voice weak from the cold

"I'm here Bells. You're okay" I felt my body relax slightly, defrosting in his arms as he lifted me and carried me out from the forest.

I curled into his chest, holding him with my frail arms. "Jake" I whispered again, revelling in the sound of his name "_He_'s here" I could feel Jake's chest and arms tighten protectively around me.

"I know" he said into my ear.

"I'm scared" I whispered, feeling myself falling into the unknown.

Jake's lips pressed against the top of my head for a moment before he said "You're safe with me" I felt my eyelids become heavy and I fell into a deep stupor.

...

"Bella!" I heard someone yell. It was as though my mind and eyes were covered by a cloth. Everything seemed unclear. Almost like trying to see through murky waters or trying to hear through a wall. The male voice was muffled so much that I couldn't remember who it belonged to.

"Where did you find her?" The voice demanded.

Then another voice responded, more familiar this time "She was sitting on the side of the road. She took a few too many turns and couldn't work out how to get back"

The unknown man came closer, his volume rising with the closing distance. "Let me take her, Jacob"

I felt another pair of arms wrap beneath my legs and shoulders, tugging slightly to pull me free of Jake's grip. "Let her go Jacob" The unknown man seemed desperate. The need to take me from Jake's arms was written in the pain in his voice.

Warm arms squeezed me once before letting me be collected and held fully against the strange mans chest. I could hear a faint chuckle from nearby. "Looks like she has me hooked, Charlie". I suddenly realised who this man was. It was my father. My own loving and caring father wanted to hold me to make sure I was safe. In the same instant I realised that my fingers were digging into Jake's skin, holding him where he stood.

Feeling safe where I was I slowly let my fingers uncurl, letting him go. Charlie turned me so that I faced his shirt, my hands finding their hold quickly. "Bella" he said quietly as I felt him begin to walk, holding me tightly. "I was so worried"

"Sorry Dad" I said "I'm so sorry"

"I love you"

"Love you too, dad" I replied and found myself in a daze of happiness and love.

_**Dum dum duuuuuuummmm! Wow, that took me ages, but I hope it was worth it.**_

_**So, how do you like it? Is this suiting the new moon storyline alright?**_

_**BTW the lyrics of the songs I based these chapters on are now on my profile, so if you want to see where I got my inspiration from feel free to have a look.**_

_**OMG just watched Remember Me the other day. I am no fan of Robert Patterson, but he was really good in this film. It was sooooo sad. A real tear jerker. I recommend it to you all.**_

_**Oh aaaaaaaannnnnnddddd, guess who got the new Infernal Devices book, the clockwork angel by Cassandra Clare! Prequel to the mortal instruments series. Only a few chapters in but it is as awesome as all the others (even if there is no jace :p). **_

_**And finally, Please review. Reviews=love, and love=an inspired writer who wants to post sooner rather than later :)**_

_**Here's to your sweet dreams and happy endings,**_

_**lee-leerose xx**_


	21. Time After Time

_**Hey all,**_

_**Here's the next instalment. I hope you enjoy it. Also I have just read over the whole story again and think my writing has improved a lot since the very beginning. I'd like to thank you all for helping me along the way. You keep me inspired with all your faves, alerts and definitely reviews.**_

_**I also noticed that in almost every chapter Bella seems really rather depressed. I'm sorry. I don't mean to make her Jake-dependent but I guess that if I was in her situation I would really want a guy who would just be there for me unconditionally, and that's exactly what I base Jake on. I guess I'm just a sucker for romance :)**_

_**Well, this one's inspired by **_**Quietdrive**

_**lee-leerose xx**_

**Chapter 21: Time After Time**

_I was walking the streets of La Push. The sun had set beneath the trees, sending me into complete darkness. My feet were thudding on the pavement rhythmically. Each step seemed to light up the path as though the pressure forced out the brightness. It reminded me of walking on damp sand. Each time I placed my foot upon the cement it glowed. I listened to the footsteps. "_Thud thud thud_". _

_Even though everything seemed fine I couldn't help but feel as though something was amiss. My whole body tingled as though I was being watched. I listened again, more carefully this time. "_Thud thud**-thud** thud_". There were another, faster set of footsteps coming up behind me._

_I quickened my pace and half-ran into the black night. I chanced a look over my shoulder but couldn't see anything through the suffocating darkness. _

_I began to run, forcing my legs to move, pumping my arms by my sides, propelling myself forwards. I was running as fast as I could, yet it didn't seem to be fast enough. My feet were losing traction. I was slipping and sliding in the same spot. _

_The pursuing footsteps were becoming louder and louder, echoing in my mind as I pushed myself harder than ever. I could feel wet streaks fall down my face, a mixture of tears and sweat. My thudding heart beat loudly in my chest, screaming in protest to my persistent running. _

_The footsteps came to a slow right behind me as I exerted myself fully, trying to break free of my sessile position. I was running on a treadmill, tiring but not getting anywhere. I felt cold, steel arms lock around me and pull me backwards roughly. _

_There was a moment's pause before I felt frozen lips come to contact with my neck. Startled, I stopped running. I couldn't move. I stood perfectly still hoping for something to happen. Something, anything but this. _

_I felt my body shake violently. My captor placed two strong hands on my shoulders and shook me. I could feel my heart rattling in my empty chest. _His_ hands pulled me back and up sharply and I felt _his_ mouth open against my neck. _His_ breath was cold against my sensitive skin as _his_ teeth grazed lightly across my flesh. _

_It was then that I found the will to move. My muscles found their energy and whipped into motion. I struggled against _his_ iron grip, but to no avail. _His_ hands only held more tightly. I threw my head back in pain. My bones felt as though they were being crushed to dust. I screamed loudly as I tried to free myself, looking up at the dark night sky. Stars dotted the velvet night above me. As his lips clasped tightly to the skin under my jaw I could feel myself begin to fall. _

_The sky was spinning before me, creating bright white circles in my vision. I felt him tug me sharply backwards before his teeth sunk into my neck..._

I gasped loudly as my eyes flew open and I sat up quickly, my hand moving to my neck in the same fluid motion. There was no sharp pain, no rock solid hands holding me down. However, there were another pair of hands clasped gently around the arm I had leaning on the bed

.

I looked down to see two large russet brown hands curled around my wrist and elbow. Beside me lay a worried Jake. He was half sitting, poised as though he was waiting for something drastic to happen.

My chest rose slowly as I calmed myself. I was at home in my bed and Jake was here. I was safe.

I reached up to rub the sleep from my eyes before lying down and rolling to face Jake.

"Hey" I whispered, reaching out to run my thumb down the side of his face. His brow was furrowed with concern, his jaw clenched.

"Hey" he whispered back "Are you okay?" he asked, releasing his grip on my arm to tuck a stray strip of hair behind my ear.

"A little shaken, but okay" I could feel myself begin to relax with Jake's presence.

"Hence the nightmares, huh?"

"Yea" I said quietly "How did you...?"

"Let's call it boyfriend instinct" He smiled sweetly.

"Thankyou" I whispered "You saved me, again"

Jake's lips pulled up into a small smile "I was so worried. Once Billy told me that you were missing I pretty much ran out the door"

"Poor Billy" I said "Remind me to thank him for being so good about all this. He's taken it all so well. I feel like I'm stealing his only son away from him"

Jake shook his head, a small chuckle escaping his lips "He doesn't mind. He knows how much you mean to me. Plus," he added "You're his best friends' daughter. Charlie was worried sick that you'd been hurt, or worse still, that those people from Port Angeles had gotten you. Billy loves you as his own daughter. He wanted to see that you were safe"

I felt my body stiffen. "Port Angeles?"

"Yea" Jake whispered, obviously confused by my reaction "Didn't Charlie tell you about all those disappearances?"

I nodded slowly as I thought about what Jake had said

_They were too fast. They seemed to know we were there. We followed them, but lost them in the forests leading to Port Angeles._

"Oh God" I gasped. Jake slid his arms around my waist and pulled me close. The contact was nice. I could feel my heart stutter in my chest, although Jake may not have been the reason for it this time.

"Jake,_ Port Angeles_. How much of a coincidence is it that all these disappearances have been happening in the town where you last spotted Victoria and Laurent running to?"

Jake's eyes widened "You don't think..."

"Yes, I do" I finished "They've been stealing those kids Jake, I know it. I can feel it"

Jake was silent for a moment "They won't get to you, Bells. I promise."

I sighed "They might not have to" I slipped my arms around Jake, holding myself to him. I could feel Jake's arms tighten in the process as the protective nature I loved took over. There was no point in beating around the bush. "_He_'s back" I said, simply "_He_ came to get me. That's what I was dreaming about. That's why I woke up"

The next thing I knew I was pressed tighter than ever to Jake's chiselled chest. His body warmth seeped through my skin, warming me to the bone and ensuring I stayed sane. "He won't get you" Jake promised "Not in a thousand years"

I closed my eyes contentedly and nuzzled my face into his skin "So_ he_** is** back?"

Jake nodded "I smelt _him_, when I was looking for you" He said, his voice low "We can only hope it was a quick visit. _He_ might have left, but I don't know if he brought any of the others with him. If he did they could still be here. Nevertheless the others are on guard outside. I told them to not only look out for Victoria and Laurent but also other vamps."

"Who's outside now?"

"Embry and Seth are in the trees. Leah is running the borders with Sam"

"Please, let them be safe" I spoke, not to Jake but to whoever might be listening from above. I could only hope everyone would get out of this mess unharmed.

_...later_

From then on I lay quietly in Jake's arms. Our synchronized breathing was calming. Each rise of his chest would meet mine and for a small moment and there would be no room for our troubles, only us in this small space. But then we would breathe out and the moment would be lost to the night. His body would pull away slightly and my arms would tighten in protest as I attempted to stay close to him, forever.

"Bells" Jake's soft voice cracked through the silent room "Why didn't you tell me it's your birthday this Saturday?"

I sucked in a mouthful of air and released it slowly, not wanting the memories to come back.

Everything had gone so horribly wrong last year. In my mind's eye I could see the small paper cut, the blood, and the six ravenous vampires. My so called 'special day' had ended especially badly. I had been left broken hearted and lost, both literally and figuratively. I could remember the cold of the forest floor as I lay curled in a ball. I could remember the weeks of ensuing pain, which eventually turned into months of zombie-like behaviour in which each day morphed into the next. It was not the happiest of memories and was definitely something I wanted to forget.

"My birthday is nothing special" I replied quietly "It's only another day on the calendar. Nothing makes it stand out from the other 364 in the year."

"But I have to do_ something_..." Jake spoke quickly, but not quick enough. I stopped him midsentence, a finger pressed to his lips

"I don't want a party and I don't want you to buy me anything. I just want this to be a normal day, or as normal as it can be when it concerns me and my wolf boyfriend. I just want to spend time with you."

Jake huffed in disappointment "I was afraid you were going to say that, but..."

"No 'buts'" I said defiantly

"...but..." Jake's eyes were pleading, his bottom lip jutting out in a pout.

I sighed and used my arms, which were locked around his neck, to pull myself up so that my eyes were level with his. I kissed his lips lightly.

I pulled away from Jake, shaking my head slightly to clear it. "Okay, I'll bite. What is it Jake? What's the 'but'?" I asked, giving in to curiosity

Jake grinned and reached around to grasp my shoulders and pull me flush against him. My mouth opened fully against his of its own accord. Jake didn't hesitate when I gasped in surprise at the contact. He moved his hands to my hair and combed through the brown mess before he moved down my face and neck, brushing my breasts slightly as he ran them down my sides to my thighs.

"But your birthday _is _special. It's special to _me._" Jake said before taking my lips with his once more. "Won't you please let me give you something?" He asked between kisses. I shook my head, never breaking the kiss.

He was playing dirty, and he knew it. I knew he was doing this to get his own way, but somehow I couldn't stop myself. I had never felt such an undeniable feeling of need and want before. My body was sending messages of what it wanted to my mind, and boy oh boy did I want it. But as my brain tried to keep up I realised I wasn't ready for anything more. My logical side screamed for me to control myself while my body pleaded 'just a little bit longer'. I felt like a child trying to convince her mum she should postpone her bedtime.

It felt so amazing to be held and caressed this way. Jake's hands played across my thighs and ticked the exposed skin below the hem of my shorts. I couldn't find the will to tell him to stop. I knew it was wrong to lead him on, but my body wanted nothing more than to feel his hands on me, his lips on mine.

Jake's lips were urgent, his soft skin tugging at mine persistently. I peppered tiny, soft kisses across his face and down his neck before returning to his lips and taking his bottom one between both of mine. Then, feeling rather playful I pulled back my lips slightly to take his lip between my teeth. I could hear Jake groan as my teeth grazed across his full lip.

When I broke away Jake whispered "I want to give you something. You deserve the world but I know you won't take that, so I have a small gift for you. Please accept it" He took my lips again, swaying my decision. How on earth could I resist him? I couldn't speak around the onslaught of his kisses so I nodded eagerly. Jake grinned against my mouth and took it more ferociously with his expert lips. He was euphoric with my decision.

My mind wandered from his lips to his hands, which were still caressing my thighs. They paused momentarily before he cupped the back of my legs and turned us so that I was lying on top of him. He then lifted my legs to his sides where they locked into his hips. He moved his hands to trace lines up and down my spine, causing me to shiver. I was panting heavily now, attempting to breathe between kisses, only to be knocked into a frenzy by his intoxicating scent.

I had to slow this down, but I had no idea how. It was impossible to decide anything when my legs were wrapped around Jake and his hands were touching me like this. I needed space if I was going to think coherently.

Slowly I broke my grip from around his neck and moved my hands to his chest. My splayed fingers could feel his heart beating into overdrive beneath his overheated skin. I paused for a moment, working up the energy to do what I needed to do, and then shoved lightly against his chest.

Although my strength was weak I knew that Jake would notice. His hands moved up my back to my hair where they twisted in the locks for a moment before he turned us so that we lay side-by-side on the bed. His lips ceased to move against mine as he pulled away to lean so only our foreheads touched.

Our breathing seemed extremely loud in the silent room. For a moment I was afraid that Charlie might have heard, but remembering how heavy a sleeper he was I quickly put that worry to rest.

"Bells" Jake spoke first. His voice was rough and he spoke through deep breaths.

"Jake" I spoke back, breathing just as heavily as he was "That was cheating"

Jake's grin broke through the dark room, glistening from some unseen light "Oh come on. It's not cheating if both teams enjoy themselves, and it seems to me that you enjoyed that just as much as I did"

I slapped his arms playfully and narrowed my eyes "It's still a bias decision" Jake's eyes flickered slightly as though he was unsure if he had taken this too far "But you're right. I did enjoy myself" Jake's eyes lit up again. His mouth was against mine in a second, his lips dancing with glee. I giggled as he pulled away. "Thankyou, Bells. Thankyou, thankyou, thankyou" he whispered, playing tiny kisses on the corners of my mouth and nose after each word of thanks.

When he ceased thanking me I placed a last kiss on his lips before turning away from him. Jake pulled the messy bed sheets up to my chin and curled his arms around my waist, tugging me back towards his body.

I didn't flinch at the new contact. I had felt more of Jake tonight than ever before and I knew now that something had changed. We couldn't go back now we had been that close. It was a Pandora's Box.

I could feel Jake's body curved to mine as I drifted off to sleep, all thoughts of vampires and werewolves extinguished. There was only Jake and I. I couldn't help thinking that I really was the luckiest girl in the world, to have a boyfriend like him.

...

Saturday arrived with no time at all. I awoke to a knock on the door and with a quick glance around the room to check for any visible giveaways that Jake had visited the night before. I cleared my throat and called "Come in". The door swung open slowly and Charlie's face peered around the corner.

He wore his trademark checker shirt with his baggy khaki pants. He held his hands in front of him, clasping a small box. "Happy Birthday Bells" He said as he walked into my room.

I sat up in my bed as he came to sit beside me and hand me the gift. "I got you a little something." He said as I took it in my hands "Well, actually it's from both your mother _and_ I. I asked her to get it for you in Arizona, and then she wrapped it and sent it down. Thank god for that too because you know how horrible I am at wrapping presents" I glanced up at him curiously. For as long as I could remember Charlie had never really had a say in my birthday or my Christmas gifts. He was usually coordinated by my overbearing mother. It was nice to know that she had finally let him have a say in something.

I slipped my thumb in between the layers of paper and ripped. The paper fell off the box with a flourish and for the first time I saw the tiny purple box, no bigger than my palm. It lay there shimmering slightly in the sunlight streaming through the gap in the curtains. I pinched the lid between my thumb and forefinger and pulled it open.

Inside sat a tightly coiled thin chain. I picked it up carefully and as it unravelled I saw a tiny silver locket hanging from it. I glanced up at Charlie. He seemed nervous to see my reaction. I smiled at him "I love it" I said, holding the locket securely in my palm and throwing my arms around my unsuspecting father "Thank you so much" I hugged him tightly while he patted my back awkwardly.

"I'm glad" he said, pulling away "Go ahead and open it up"

I glanced down at the locket to see that there were indeed a set of miniscule hinges on the side. I cracked open one side and opened it up. Inside there were two sets of photos.

One side showed a photo of my mum and Phil, grinning widely at me from the tiny frame. Phil was dressed in his regular team outfit for softball while my mother was in her Sunday's best. They were noticeably happy, standing in front of our house in Arizona.

The other side of the locket held a tiny photo of three men; Charlie, Billie and Jake. Dad and Jake stood proudly on either side of Billie who was seated in his wheelchair outside our house. I could see my truck further off to the side; Charlie's cruiser parked behind it in the driveway. Jake's smile was glorious, as always, and Billie's eyes gave away his happiness. Charlie had a hand on the back of his best friends' wheelchair, also grinning like a maniac.

It was then that something struck me. These were the two parts of my family; Mum and Phil in Arizona, and Charlie, Billie and Jake here in Forks. Even though they were so different and so far apart they had both made it through tough times and now they were both just as happy as one another, they had both moved on.

I was broken from my thoughts by what Charlie said next "It's so you never forget your family" he said "Wherever you go, whatever you do, however badly you stuff up, we'll be there for you"

I could feel tears forming in my eyes as I leant in for another hug. "I love you, dad"

"Love you too, Bells. Happy Birthday"

...

"So, you're one year older today" Jake stated, throwing the blanket out on our back lawn and kneeling down to straighten it.

"Huh, oh, yea" I said quietly, pulling myself away from my thoughts.

Jake looked up at me and reached up to take my hands. "C'mon, surely you can't be so old that your knees are giving you problems already" he teased. I stuck my tongue out at him and sat down cross legged on the checkered picnic blanket.

I had been home alone when miraculously; Jake had shown up at my front door. Charlie had received a suspicious phone call earlier today. It had turned out to be Billie, who needed company to watch the big game today. Of course, I knew better. This was my gift from Billie; personal time with Jake. And I was so thankful.

Everything had been so stressful recently. I had a death threat looming over my shoulder twenty four-seven and now it seemed that the reason for my months of zombie like solitude had returned to haunt me.

Slowly, Jake moved closer to me so that his body hovered slightly above mine. I shifted my position slightly so that I leant back on my elbows. He lifted his shining eyes to mine before planting a small, sweet kiss on my lips. He hovered over me for a moment before reaching into his back pocket. He pulled from it a small, dark package. The material was silky and smooth, wrapped into a bundle with a piece of silvery ribbon. "Happy Birthday Isabella Swan, the love of my life"

I couldn't help but smile as I took the tiny package from him. "Bella" I corrected, although I didn't really mind. I would have loved to hear those words pass over his lips once more, no matter how he said my name. He smiled in response but said nothing more.

With Jake still hovering over me I pulled on the ribbon and unfolded the silk fabric. Inside was a plain silver chain. The links were medium, not to big and not too small. I turned it around in my palm and saw that there was a tiny ornament hanging from the link opposite the clasp. I felt my jaw drop open at the sight of the tiny wooden carving.

It was a small wolf, positioned as though howling at the full moon. Its head was tilted back, mouth opened in a small 'o' shape, and eyes closed to slits. "Jake, it's beautiful" I said, taking the wolf between my thumb and forefinger to examine it more closely.

"Do you like it?" He asked, ducking his head

"Like it?" I asked as though that was the most ridiculous question that I'd ever heard "I love it!"

Jake grinned and I leant forwards to thank him properly. "Thankyou, thankyou, thankyou" I said, kissing him lightly.

Jake sat back and pulled me into his lap. I lay still while he took the tiny silver chain from me and proceeded to clasp it around my wrist. I watched as those hands, so large and rough from years of toying with cars and such, unclasped the tiny connector and re-linked it around my wrist. That he was able to work something so delicate was a surprise. I would have thought he might fumble or be frustrated with the miniscule links and chains, but Jake rose to the occasion, as always. Within no time at all I held my hand up to the light of the sun. The bracelet shone brightly, light sparking off it in all directions.

"You know Jacob Black, I'm happy you talked me into letting you buy a gift for me. I really do love it" I said, moving my wrist so that the light from the sun danced across the picnic blanket.

Jake chuckled, watching me from above as I lay in his lap. "There are two things wrong with that statement." He said "The first is that, well, I'm not sure I _talked _you into anything"

I rolled my eyes "Mature Jake, but technically true. Whatever it was that you call what we did the other night, I thank you for it. Not only did I receive a fabulous gift, but also a free make-out session with my stunningly gorgeous boyfriend"

Jake snorted with amusement "As I said at the time, we both enjoyed ourselves. You with your 'stunningly gorgeous boyfriend' and me with my amazingly beautiful girlfriend"

I smiled "What was the second thing wrong with my statement?"

"Oh" Jake said, distracted "I didn't buy the gift"

I sat up quickly and turned to look at Jake. There was an amused look in his eyes, his mouth twitching into a smile.

"What do you mean?" I asked "Did you _make _it?"

Jake nodded and I lifted my wrist up to re-examine the bracelet. It was so beautiful, and so small.

"That's unbelievable Jake."

"Well, you'd better believe it hun"

"Wow" I exclaimed as I stared at my wrist "This makes my drawing look like rubbish. I'm sorry. Your birthday gift wasn't much in comparison"

"What are you talking about, Bells. I loved your gift. That's what gave me the idea to make you this." He gestured to the tiny wolf "My skills don't really extend out of the shed so I had to try my hand at something other than drawing. I often used to carve things for my dad. You know, furniture and such. But this called for a refinement of my carving skills. It was kind of frustrating at first, but then I remembered who I was making it for and it became a lot easier"

I felt blush seep into my cheeks and ducked my head slightly.

Jake placed a hand on my waist and gently drew my body closer to his. His other hand rested beneath my chin and lifted it slightly so he could meet my eyes. "Happy Birthday, Bells" he said again before touching his lips to mine.

_**I was finally able to upload! Yay! **_

_**Was it good? I decided you guys needed another Jacob fix.**_

_**I hope it wasn't too physical, but I decided they needed to move forward slightly in that department...please tell me what you thought as I have never written anything remotely like this before.**_

_**Oh my gosh! Exams soon. EEEK! Totally freaking out. Please keep reviewing though as it keeps me inspired, plus it serves as a reminder to how many people actually want to find out what happens next. It helps when I'm stressed out :) Next chapter is called "Year ago today". I already know what's going to happen. Can you guess?**_

_**On a tangent now, we were discussing today what makes us happy. Most people said that receiving a smile makes them happy. For me, I am happy both when receiving a smile and when giving them. However, I am not really able to smile to you guys over the internet unless I use a smiley like this : ) So I have decided that every time I sign off I will use a different sentence, which will hopefully make you smile. Yes, it may be cheesy but if it makes someone out there happy I will give you all the cheese in the world. So from now on all my goodbyes will be happy and positive. And just out of interest, what makes you smile? Your best friend? Listening to music? Playing sport or a musical instrument? Whatever it is, I would love to know :)**_

_**Carefree**__** laughter and sunshine smiles,**_

_**lee-leerose xx**_


	22. Year Ago Today

_Hey all,_

_Yay! Breaking the drought here. I have not been able to upload so I have a build up of chapters written (As I actually type them using the Microsoft word program on my phone, then upload them when I can connect to my dads computer) Soooo, review and then I can post them ;) Here's the next one. Inspired by _Delta Goodrem_, again :)_

_Steph Meyer owns Twilight Saga._

**Chapter 22****: Year Ago Today**

Cleaning. Some love it, some hate it. Me, I stand somewhere in between absolutely despising it and being completely in love with it.

I loved being organised. Perhaps it had something to do with how crazy my life was. Some would blame my obsessive cleaning on having divorced parents, but I didn't think that was the reason.

Sure their "long-distance relationship" - if it could be called such a thing - had definitely impacted on my childhood. I had been moved back and forth for many years, never really finding a 'home'. With each move from Forks to Arizona, and Arizona to Forks I only saw it as changing houses. Neither place was my home.

No, my divorced parents were one thing, but my cleaning was another. I supposed it was the only thing that I had control over in my life. This last year had been so crazy. I couldn't control who I fell in love with, I couldn't decide how they would choose to treat me, but I could control how tidy my room was. It was the only constant variable I had.

So there I found myself, on my knees with a dustpan in hand, scrounging around beneath my bed as I attempted to clean up the dust bunnies that had culminated there. Jake was lying on my bed, his hands crossed behind his head.

"...Then Leah phased back. That sure scared the jeepers out of Embry" He finished.

He had been telling me all about what I had missed in La Push during the last couple of days. Apparently Embry had stepped on Leah's tail when she was in wolf phase. Leah had phased back to human form out of pain and forgotten that she wasn't wearing any clothes. Usually she was careful not to phase in front of the boys, but not this time. Embry received the scare of his life when a naked Leah started screaming her head off at him.

"Poor Leah" I empathised, stretching out to sweep up the rest of the grime.

"Poor Leah?" Jake asked, sounding amused

"Yea" I said "I mean, she was exposed in front of a member of her wolf pack. She would have been embarrassed"

I heard Jake snort on the bed above me. "Not Leah. She's a tough girl. I'd be more worried about the psychological damage this has done to Embry. Contrary to what he likes to tell people I don't think he's ever actually seen a girl like _that_."

"Oh" I said "That _would_ be a bit of a scare" I laughed and felt the bed rock above me as Jake laughed along too. I scooped up a little more dust and just when I thought that I'd gotten it all, I saw it. A huge build up of dust near the leg of my bed. I reached out with the brush, but couldn't quite reach due to the way my bedside table was positioned. I knew that I had to find some way to clean it up or it would taunt me forever.

I shuffled closer on my hands and knees before moving so far under the bed that only my rear end protruded from beneath. I stretched my arms out as far as they would go, scraping at the floor with the brush while I attempted to pull the annoying clump of dust towards the dustpan.

Then I felt something. Just as I shifted my knee to gain better access to the untouchable space I felt the floor move beneath me. I yelped as my stomach dropped at the feeling. It was like walking up a set of stairs during the dead of night and you think there's one more step than there really is. Your foot falls through mid-air and your stomach flips over itself. For a moment you are disorientated. It's takes you a while to get your head back together but eventually you come to realise that what you were expecting was never really there at all.

That was how it felt when the floorboard suddenly moved beneath me. Confused, I forgot about the dust and scrambled backwards. "What's the matter?" Jake asked, his voice curious.

"Nothing" I said "I think the floor just moved, is all"

There it was, right where my knee had been kneeling. The loose floorboard had moved slightly to the right to show what was beneath. Where there should have been only darkness I could see a small brown wooden box. I pulled the floorboard further to the side and reached in to pick it up. It seemed to be a small wooden jewellery box. There were hinges at the top of one side showing that the lid opened. On the front side there was a thin draw with a tiny gold knob attached. It was lacquered with gold edging framing the lid.

"Hang On. Did you say the floor _moved_?" Jake's head hung over the side of the bed, peering through the darkness at me. His eyes were barely discernable as his mob of black hair fanned over his face.

"Sure. Look at this. It was under a loose floorboard"

I pulled myself out from underneath the bed and put the jewellery box on the floor in front of me. I took the lid in my hands and lifted it open. I felt immediately ill. My stomach churned at the sight of the box's contents.

Slipped into the place where a mirror should have been was a photograph. It was creased down the centre, showing where I had folded it all those months ago.

Tears filled my eyes as I gazed at that beautiful, stunning, double-crossing face. Even dejected as _he_ was when this picture had been taken, my ex-boyfriend still managed to pull of a look that would make any man cry. _His_ jaw was a defined line, leading back to _his_ high cheek bones and slim nose. Those rosy pink lips that had so often smiled the crooked grin I loved so much were pulled into a straight, emotionless line. _His_ eyes were what caused me the most pain. The topaz jewels I remembered so well were gone. Replaced instead with dark, sultry orbs. But that wasn't what caused the pain. It was the fact that they weren't looking at the camera, but instead their gaze was set on the tiny brown eyed girl standing next to _him_.

_Me._

That girl was oblivious to what was about to happen to her. She had no idea how much pain this _boy_ would put her through. Her heart was about to be split in two, her soul lost and yet she had no inkling of just a big an impact this _guy_ was going to have on her life.

However, this naive girl had grown, and she now stood tall and strong in her new life. Her heart had been healed, her soul mended and her life restarted by Jacob. This_ boy_ no longer held a place in her heart, and _he_ never would, ever again.

I quickly wiped the back of my hand across my eyes and closed the lid. I didn't understand how this picture could have made its way here. I couldn't remember keeping anything in my moments of despair. I had thrown out everything. I had even ripped my car stereo out with my bare hands! Why would I pay this much special attention to such a heart wrenching photo?

My mind was spinning when I reached out to pull open the thin draw. It slid out easily and I couldn't help but gasp at what I saw. A familiar disc sat inside a clear plastic CD case. Even though there was no writing I knew what it was. This was the CD _he _had made me for my birthday last year. Curled up into a tight scroll next to it was a set of papers. These were the tickets for a trip to Phoenix, given to me by my beloved 'adoptive' parents.

I couldn't help it. Tears welled in my eyes as I sat in front of the inoffensive box. It was ridiculous, but somehow my emotions were thrown by these tiny objects. It wasn't what they were that made me upset, but instead what they represented. All the love, loss and hatred I had felt in the last year was contained in this tiny jewellery box

I covered my eyes with my hands, and rested my elbows on my knees. This was insane. Why couldn't I just forget about it all? What had I done to deserve all this pain? I regretted ever having met _him_ in the first place. If it wasn't for _him_ none of this would have happened. I wouldn't have fallen in love so deeply, only to have it stripped from me within what felt like seconds. I could have found my way to Jake without the concept of death and sadness looming over my shoulder at every moment.

I could feel strong hands curl around my thin fingers as Jake attempted to pry them away. "Look at me Bells. What is it?"

"It's stupid" I sobbed, holding my hands tighter to my face to shield my teary eyes.

"Nothing that makes you upset is stupid. Now, what is it?" He repeated calmly. His hands tugged at my fingers and I gave in, letting them fall to my thighs with a slap. "It's this stupid box" I whispered in a hoarse voice, gesturing to the jewellery box with my chin.

Jake, who was now stretched horizontally across my bed, his face turned to me, looked down for a moment. He cocked an eyebrow at the sight of the box and pursed his lips. "What is it that makes this particular box just so 'stupid'?" he asked, lifting his face to flash me a beautiful smile.

In answer, I reached out and opened the lid to the box once more. Without looking inside I spun it around to face Jake. His eyes widened in response, his smile disappearing. I could feel my hands shaking as I held the lid open. The waterworks had unplugged and I closed my eyes as the first of the large wet teardrops started to slide down my cheeks. I was trying not to think about _him_. I had to focus on something else.

I could hear the creaking of springs as Jake got up. I felt him sit on the floor next to me, his warmth causing my skin to tingle. The next thing I felt was Jake putting his hands on top of mine and slowly pushed them down, closing the lid to my memories in one fluid action.

When the lid was shut he didn't let go. His hands kept a firm hold on mine as he lifted them to his lips and kissed the back of each. I slowly opened my eyes at the sensation and turned away from the box, towards him, allowing myself to become fully entranced by his presence.

When he finally let my hands go he reached forwards to run his thumbs across my cheeks, drawing the tears away from my eyes. "You're alright" He said, his voice low "You're alright" He seemed to be trying to convince himself as much as me.

I glanced down to the box, and then back to Jake, whose eyes were glued to my face. His hands stayed where they were, rubbing small circles on my skin. His warmth seeped through me, working its magic until I was calm and collected. I let my eyelids close again, but this time of their own accord as I focussed on nothing but the feeling of Jake's skin on mine.

"Jake, Can I ask you to do a favour for me?" I asked as my eyes fluttered open.

"Anything" he promised.

"Will you take me to the forest?"

"The forest?" Jake's brow furrowed with confusion

"Yes. Deep inside the forest"

"Okay" Jake said, drawing out the syllables for effect. "May I ask why?"

"I'm going to rid myself of these memories once and for all."

Jake nodded once, showing that he understood. "Are you ready to go now?"

"Yes" Within mere seconds of answering Jake had me swept of the floor. I was cradled against his warm chest, the box somehow having made its way into my hands.

He carried me to the window and looked down at me once, concern in his eyes. "Go," I whispered "Jump"

Jake did as I said, stepping up to the window frame before leaping out of it.

My stomach did a strange flip as we fell through the air. When he landed gracefully on the grass with a soft thud I failed to contain the small gasp that burst from my lips. "Are you okay?" Jake asked quickly.

"Yes" I nodded. Without another word Jake took off in the direction of the forest, me in his arms.

...

"Set me down here" I said as Jake jogged into a clearing.

We were surrounded by trees, deep within the confines of the forest. It was almost suffocatingly close standing beneath the looming trees. They billowed above in the strong winds as we stood below, powerless against them. It was amazing to think that these huge structures had been growing here for thousands of years.

A light green moss covered the rough bark, sending out an almost luminescent glow. The ground was covered with leaves and twigs, which were also coated in the same velvety moss.

Jake placed me down gently so that my feet found grip with the debris instead of the slippery wet rocks. His arms remained glued to my waist, keeping me from falling face first onto the cold ground.

I held onto the jewellery box firmly, not wanting to drop and break it open for fear that I would have to face the memorabilia once again. I took a few steps forward and when Jake's hands didn't release me I looked over my shoulder to whisper "It's okay. I'll be alright" Jake let go reluctantly, his hands slipping from my sides as I walked towards the tree in front of me.

It was huge. Even if Jake and I had stretched our arms completely around either side of it, our fingers would never have touched. The trunk stood strong and firm, held to the ground by vast roots that buckled in the cramped area. Bits of bark pushed up out of the ground all around us where it had run out of space to grow.

When I reached the base of the massive _arbre_ I took a stick and prodded the ground. When I found a point unobstructed by roots I plunged it deep into the soil. I levered it to the side and pulled upwards, digging up the sodden earth. Just as soon as I had dug up the dirt a tiny landslide took place and the soil rolled back into place, covering my small amount of progress.

Jake sighed behind me, his voice louder than usual in the quiet forest. This was going to be tedious. My stick only moved a small amount of dirt at a time. Barely enough to plant a small seedling in. And even when I did make progress the soil would only cave in to leave me with something similar to what I had before. However, I persevered and kept digging away at the sodden soil.

After a few shots at digging with my stick I felt something cold and wet touch my arm. Looking to the side I was surprised to see a huge animal. I jumped slightly, shocked, before realising that this particular beast was a wolf. Not just any wolf, but Jake.

He nudged my arm with his wet nose once more, his fur tickling my skin, and gestured to the base of the tree with a flick of his shaggy head.

He wanted to help.

I smiled and nodded "Go ahead" I moved back as the huge wolf took my spot. He placed his paws over the mound I had attempted to move with my stick and began to dig. It took him five scoops before it was finished; a hole big enough for a jewellery box.

I walked up behind the wolf's form and ran my hand up his furry back to behind his ear. I scratched it instinctively. "Thank you" I could hear Jake's purr of contempt rumble through his whole body as I grasped his fur in my fist.

I kissed a patch of russet coloured fur above his nose before turning back to the hole. Leaning on my knees I took one last look at the jewellery box before placing it in the hole.

There it was. My memories, my pain, my torture was all held in that tiny box. This was all I had left and I was putting it away forever. This was my choice, my decision to make. It showed that I was another year older, a little bit stronger, a little bit wiser than a year ago today.

Looking over my shoulder I really was so much younger then. In this last year I had grown and changed in ways I would have never thought possible. I can't believe what happened a year ago today. I was hurt beyond repair, yet somehow I had been fixed. Perhaps not completely, but the best I could possibly be. My life would never again be simple or normal.

There will always be the chance of being hurt and thrown down into the depths of despair. But none of that matters. The thing that truly matters is the way you pull yourself out of that despair. The way you choose to play the cards you have. The people you meet, the life you live. It's the future, and the journey you take to get there that's important.

I can't just forget about it all. I know that. Or it would be nothing. But this wasn't nothing. This was something that changed my life so completely it is impossible to forget. Whether I have changed for the better or worse it isn't in my power to go back in time and make different choices than the ones that got me into the position I'm in today.

_He_ went away a year ago today. All the tears have run dry. Life seemed so unkind. I just can't understand it. I don't think I ever will. How many times have a questioned myself because of it? What more could i do? I found myself by losing him. Now I've got to pick myself up, take another look, dust myself off because life's too short. I have to be able to let go of the things I had tried for so long to keep.

I turned back to the wolf-form Jake and nodded. He moved past me and swept a paw forwards, spilling the dug-up earth back into the hole. It was done.

I watched as the box was covered. Surely this was the last time I would ever have to face my memories. The last time I would ever have to feel pain.

_I know that was relatively short considering how long it's been since I last undated and I am extremely sorry. I have been at mums for weeks now and haven't had time to upload my stuff._

_I will be back at mums for the rest of the school year so the same thing applies for the next 4 weeks. I may not find time to post anyway as I also have exams coming up extremely soon._

_After that School is out and I shoot off to Africa for a week and a half. I know! Insane right! I am SOOOO excited. Just me, my dad, my camera and my sketchpad/pencils for 2 weeks. It's going to be awesome! After that is Christmas, then I go on a camping trip with my lovely girlies from school. Should be good fun. Then we are going east for almost the whole of January. I know, I know. When am I ever going to find time to write in amongst all this? It's crazy! Well, I will keep writing and plotting to ensure a bigger and better New Soul for 2011...2011, my senior year! My gosh, that's scary! Anyway I will try my hardest to post, but if this is the last time I speak with you before these next few hectic months I wish you all the best in whatever you do during this time. :)_

_As and afterthought, I have also posted a chapter of another story, Defying Confusion, which is based on my life. I'm just trying to understand everything that's happened to me in the last few years, so I'm using the twilight saga to connect my life to my writing. Please give it a shot. There will be more to come, but only with reviews. If people don't have a positive response I'll just write it, but won't post it. However I will be putting my effort into New Soul first and foremost, as it is my baby; the other story is just for self-understanding. Call it the 3rd cousin, twice removed if you want :)_

_Please review to show your love so I can upload that backlog of chapters I wrote!_

_To our angels above who help us when we seek guidance and love,_

_lee-leerose xx_


	23. Hold On

_I know I said I wouldn't be posting, but I decided you guys deserved a double whammy since I won't be here for a while *wipes tear from eye*_

_So here's one more, just because I love you all :)_

_Inspired by Michael Bublé. Twilight Saga is property of Stephanie Meyer._

**Chapter 23****: Hold On**

It was a Friday afternoon and my nose was stuck in a book. Trust me when I say that I usually love books. God, I have so many books I could never count them all. However, I would have preferred anything to what I was ready just now. _Biology Stage 2: The living World. _

Other than the fact that this book wasn't exactly an all action thriller, there were so many other things I would have preferred to do on a Friday afternoon. While most normal teenagers were out socialising or celebrating the onset of the weekend I was stuck indoors with my nose in a book studying for my upcoming exams.

I only had a week left to study for my finals and I was on the edge. Everything I did revolved around study. I listened to music to concentrate better, I drank coffee to stay awake longer, I coloured and drew diagrams to help me remember different facts. My whole life seemed to be wholly and utterly consumed by what would be happening in just over 7 days.

So as I sat at my desk, engrossed by my textbook, it was a surprise when my chair was suddenly spun around. "Good afternoon" Jake greeted, his warm smile improving my mood considerably.

"Hey" I leant up to press my lips to his, rolling my chair closer with my feet as I did so. "I didn't hear you come in"

"Wolf. Remember?" He said, pointing to himself before taking the book from my hand and laying it open on the same page on the paper covered desk behind me.

Jake then leant his hands on the arm rests to either side of me. I reached up to curl my arms around his neck, jerking his face closer to mine. "Yea, I remember" I whispered as I pressed my lips to his once more.

"Hmmmm, perhaps all too well" Jake chuckled "Shouldn't you be studying? A good boyfriend would let you study without interruptions" He began to pull away, but I strengthened my grip, pulling him close again.

"A good boyfriend would want his girlfriend to have a well deserved study break every now and then" I corrected him, pressing my forehead to his and breathing in his scent.

"True" He agreed and leant closer to peck my nose once "But I do believe your 5 minutes are up" He said as he broke away from my grip, as easily as if I hadn't been trying at all.

I pouted, my bottom lip jutting out "5 more minutes" I pleaded.

Jake rolled his eyes and laughed at my expression

"No. A good boyfriend knows how to balance study and breaks. Now, half an hour of study and then you can have another break" He winked and kissed my exposed bottom lip before pulling away.

"Tease" I gushed, crossing my arms over my chest and spinning back around to face my build up of study notes and worksheets.

"I'll be back in half an hour" Jake said. I raised my hand slightly and moved it in a waving motion to show that I bid him adieu before leaning my elbows on the desk, my hands curled into my mess of hair. I heard my bedroom door open, then close, and knew that there was nothing for it. I had to study.

...

JPOV

I shook my head as I shut Bella's door behind me. She really was a character that one.

I was thankful that I had chosen the non-examinable course at the school on the reservation. I don't think I could handle the stress of finals. Bella seemed to be handling things in the best way possible but I couldn't imagine myself in the same situation.

Thinking about Bella made me smile. The way she had held onto my just moments before proved something had changed between us. Ever since the night I had spent with her after her disappearance there had been something new and exciting mixed into our relationship.

Every time she touched me I felt my skin tingle with anticipation. I craved her touch and the feel her mouth on mine. The way her eyes glistened slightly as she spoke my name. The silence as her heart missed a beat when she saw me. Everything about that girl was addictive to me. I always wanted more.

She was too desirable for her own good. I thought about her all the time. It drove the other guys insane. Sometimes wolf telepathy came in handy, but at times like this it could be rather unnecessary.

I couldn't lie. Seeing Embry squirm at the thought of Bella being with me made my day. However, I had to be careful not to think about more private moments, such as _that_ night. My 'brothers' had already proved that they couldn't be trusted when it came to keeping Bella safe from harm. I don't think they realised that physical and emotional pain had the potential to be the same thing for a sensitive girl like Bella. But if she ever did get hurt, emotionally or physically, I would be there.

I wanted to be the one who was always there for her, no matter what. When she cried and needed someone to hold. When she was cut so deep only my touch could heal her. I wanted be the one to wrap my arms around her. To envelope myself in her presence while she fed off my strength.

I stood in the hallway for a moment, smiling giddily at the fresh memories of Bella's need to have me close. Her scent was fresh in the air like morning dew on a rose bud. I breathed it in deeply, concentrating on the aroma I loved so much.

It was a mix of honey, lemon, spring water, mint and rosewater. Fresh to the taste. Just as I closed my eyes to delve deeper into the scent surrounding me I picked up on something else. There was another scent, so sickly sweet and pungent in the air that I was surprised I hadn't noticed it before.

I opened my eyes and scanned the area before me. Nothing seemed out of place. Everything was in its normal position.

I turned quickly back to Bella's door and flung it open. Sure enough the room was drenched with the smell. How I could have missed it before, I had no idea. The only explanation I could give was that I had been so overwhelmed by Bella's presence that she had masked this other scent. However, here it was, clear as day.

I glanced around the room, taking in the haphazard arrangement of clothes and books. It wasn't anything like the Bella I knew to keep her room in shambles. Usually she was as clean as anything. A neat freak, per se.

In the corner Bella sat in her spindly chair, half-turned in surprise at my entrance. Her mouth hung open, an unasked question hanging in the air between us. "Someone's been here" I said quickly and moved to her bookshelf, following the trail of sweet scent through the air.

"Who?" The word was short-lived, but even so it still wavered slightly as Bella's composure slipped.

"No-one we know" I said.

I could feel her tension lesson. It was obvious who she had been afraid of. I couldn't begin to think what I would do if I had known the scent. Perhaps I would have stayed to comfort Bella, or maybe I would have burst from the house, teeming with hate and anger. But we would never know. Right now I had a responsibility. I needed to ensure Bella's safety, and to do that I needed to find out who this mysterious visitor was and what they wanted from my Bella in the first place.

_There you are my lovelies. Is that worth a 2 month long holiday for moi? I sure do hope so. Just so we all know what's going on with this story I am going to finish it off as a _New Moon/Eclipse_ crossover. This will make everything fit together better. If I do this it means that in the sequel (only if you guys want one, of course) I will be able to make up my own storyline and have a bit more fun with the characters. It will be like my own Jacob/Bella Breaking Dawn, which means there'll be baby talk ;) What do you all think? Sequel, or no sequel? It's all up to you guys. Depending on how many reviews I get telling me what you think I will decide whether or not I will continue, or if I wrap it up soon. So far I actually have a few more chapters planned for this one. It goes to about 39 in my head, so 15 chapters to go, give or take. I know it seems like heaps now but if we are going to wrap this up I need to figure out how to tie up all the loose ends._

_The other option is that I begin on my _Mortal Instruments_ fanfic before I write a sequel. Again, it's in your hands._

_Hope to hear from you all soon :) please review_

_Light, guidance and strawberry lollipops,_

_lee-leerose xx_

_p.s Remember to check out my other fanfic, _Defying Confusion


	24. Haunted

_**Hey guys,**_

_**So I am home sick today. It sucks so much. I have been sleeping for over 20 hours and haven't eaten anything in over 22 hours. Every time I move my head feels like it's going to split in two and my vision goes blurry. Thank god for Panadol! **_

_**Luckily**__** I have short periods when I wake up and feel a little better and less dizzy so I will be able to spend some of my time writing this for you. I know I said the last chapter was my last before my 2 month break but I decided to do something constructive with my bed-ridden day. Please disregard any mistakes. I'm not in the best frame of mind. This one's inspired by Kelly Clarkson. Steph Meyer is god :)**_

**Chapter 25: Haunted**

**EPOV (Guess who! Yeah, that's it. You read right XD)**

Everything had changed. The essence of the town was different. The way the trees swayed in the wind seemed odd. The birds sang a different song. The suns rays were more intense.

Everything had grown. The trees of the forest, which would have seemed to be exactly the same to anyone with 'normal' vision, were anything but. The texture of the bark was different, eroded by the wind. The branches and roots themselves had lengthened, stretching out further than ever before.

There were even new scents on the wind. The forest smelt strange. A mix of water and grass. The moss added a scent all its own, a fresh cut through the stale air. But then there was something familiar mingling with the new scents. Something from the distant past remained present on the wind. A mix of honey and lemon, the fresh tang of morning dew, mint and rosewater. Everything I had come to love and adore. The memories of _her_ rushed back with the onslaught of _her_ scent.

I turned and ran at lightning fast speed against the wind. The scent grew stronger with each leap. I was barely even touching the ground. A blur of colour to the onlooking birds. I dodged every tree and weaved beneath every low hanging branch, wanting nothing more than to _see_ the source of the scent.

I hadn't laid eyes on her since that fateful night when our paths had crossed. I could remember the dogs barking as it filled the air on that small street. Her figure, small and fragile, had backed into view. She hadn't seen me at first, her attention still captured by the barking dog. That was until her foot caught on a rock and her whole body rocked in the air in front of me. She stumbled back into the dark.

I couldn't handle it. I had to help. I knew she wouldn't take kindly to my sudden appearance if I tried to catch her before she fell. So instead I flicked on my headlights, the bright light filling the small space. She righted herself just in time to not fall to the ground. I let out a breath of unneeded air. She was safe.

I watched as her body tensed. Every curve and feature that I loved. She would always be my singer, my only singer. She had raised her arms to cover her eyes and block the bright light. I hated not being able to see her. Her face, the one I had spent my sleepless nights remembering was covered, lost to the imagination. I could remember those beautiful brown eyes. Think about how her eyebrows would have been furrowed in confusion at that moment as she thought through the situation.

I couldn't stand this. I had to see her eyes, her lips, her rosy cheeks once more. I flicked off the headlights of the Volvo and watched as she slowly lowered her arms. She blinked wildly to clear her vision and squinted in my direction.

I knew that she wouldn't be able to see me through the Volvo's tinted windscreen, but I could only hope that she wouldn't freak at the sight of the silver car.

Bella stood there for a minute or so, making out parts of the car, one-by-one putting them together. Her slow human mind was adorable. It left me sitting on the edge of my seat, waiting for her to do something.

Her mouth opened in a gasp as she stepped back in astonishment. Her eyes opened wide in shock. It was at times like these that I wished I could read her mind. If I could just hear her thoughts I would know what to do. I could run out to greet her by gathering her frail body into my arms and kissing those surprised lips so fiercely I wasn't sure I would ever stop. Or I could drive back into the shadows, saving her from the long awaited reunion.

It was then that she turned and ran. Her small form ran in its clumsy way out of the small drive. The dog was still barking crazily, its yells echoing in the still air. This wasn't the end. I would see her again. Someday I would tell her how much it had hurt me to leave. How much I loved her, and how much I still do.

I was pulled from my memories when something else passed my path. I stopped still as the familiar scent crossed my sensitive nose. It was sickly sweet, even to me. A flash of red hair coursed through my mind. _Victoria_.

Another sniff and I discovered another closely mingled scent. Again it was sweet. Something like dark chocolate. A darker, pewter skinned animal entered my vision. _Laurent_.

They were here already. They had come to avenge James. Which could only mean ...Bella!

Not wanting to waste another minute I began to run again, moving through the trees faster than ever. My vision blurred as the forest moved past me at speeds unimaginable to any mere human. I followed my senses, allowing her scent to guide me to her.

_HERE!_ My senses screamed. My legs stopped moving automatically as I reached a small clearing. The whole area reeked of her honey water scent. If my mouth could have watered I'm sure it would have. Her scent sung to me like nothing else in the world.

I gazed around the clearing, hoping against hope that I would again see those big brown eyes. I hoped that she would look at me this time, not with surprise and terror, but with the same love and longing that she had given me all that time ago.

My heart plummeted in my chest as I realised that there was no Bella in this clearing. However, her scent was still so strong. She can't have been here very long ago. No more than a few days. I saw that there was a huge tree towering over one side of the clearing. Following her scent to its base I saw that the soil was freshly dug beneath it.

There was another scent here at the base. A stronger, woodsy smell that could only be described as that of a dog. I realised that Bella hadn't been alone. Someone else had been with her. Someone of wolf decent. And I had a sneaky suspicion I knew exactly who that was.

Excited by the prospect of what lay beneath the soil, I bent and scooped away the dirt ferociously, throwing it over my shoulders. Soon I reached something hard and smooth. I stopped, bewildered at what I had found.

It was the small jewellery box I had left beneath that loose floorboard in her room. She had found it.

A torrent of emotions crashed through me as I stood grasping the box in my hands. She had buried our memories. She had thrown them away as if they had never existed. I felt guilty. My leaving had made her feel this way. It was my fault that she had stooped to the level of that stupid wolf. I was such a stupid being. How could I leave her like that? I knew she wasn't strong enough. I had always known that. I knew she needed someone to keep her safe, and if it wasn't me then someone else had to take my place. I had wanted her to move on, but not to get herself involved with more mythical creatures.

I had to tell Alice. She had to keep a look out for any sign of Bella hurting. Now there were three things to worry about; Victoria, Laurent _and_ the wolves.

**JPOV**

"Who do you think it was?" Bella asked. I could tell that she was scared. It was the way her voice wavered with every mention of what had happened, the way her arm curled tighter around mine, her nails digging into my skin.

"I don't know. But I promise I will find out" I promised.

I had taken her for a walk. She needed to get out of that house. She needed a break from studying, not to mention all that worrying. Her life was too stressful.

First she was hurting because of the recent reappearance of Edward the other night. Whatever he was playing at I hoped he left soon. I could smell his sickly sweet scent on the wind. I had no idea what I would do if we came face to face. Hopefully I would never have to face that situation.

Secondly, Bella's exams were looming around the corner, forcing her into stress mode. She was such a diligent little worker. She wasn't about to let mythical creatures get in the way of her graduating her senior year. I loved that about her. She was so strong, so resilient.

Next, she had Victoria and Laurent looking for her twenty four-seven. We still hadn't had a whiff of them since that night we saw them running to Port Angeles. More likely than not they were the ones responsible for the disappearances of those teenagers. Feeding as they do. Filthy creatures. I could only hope that we caught them before they did too much damage.

Now to top it all off, a few days ago we had discovered that Bella had some unknown visitor sweeping through her house when she wasn't home. Whether it was just a coincidence or a linked piece to the whole puzzle I had no idea. But I took it as my duty to find out who it was and what they wanted from my Bella.

All of this was more than any ordinary girl could handle. Mind you, I wouldn't dare call Bella ordinary. She was anything but, after everything she'd been through. All those bumps in the road that she just couldn't swerve. She was a beautiful, strong and courageous girl, and I loved her.

We walked down the footpath, slowly making our way back to her house. It was getting dark and I didn't want to have her outside after sunset. Charlie wasn't home this evening. He would be working the late night shift, which meant that Bella and I had the house to ourselves.

If it had been better circumstances I might have been excited about what things an empty house could offer. But with the prospect of dread and doom heavy in the air I didn't believe that tonight would be one of 'those' nights.

Upon reaching her driveway a sharp movement in the trees to my right took my attention. I stopped, pulling Bella close to my side. She seemed to realise that something was wrong and tucked herself into my side as though hiding. She really was scared.

Making up my mind, I took Bella by the waist and walked her at double speed to the front door. She took the key and opened the lock with fumbling fingers before it swung open. I stepping inside with her, my large form keeping her small figure obscured from prying eyes.

"Lock all the windows and doors and then hide" Bella made a face "Just do this for me, please. I'm going to check something out" Bella's worried eyes widened with fear as she realised I was leaving her. "I'll be back" I promised, kissing her trembling lips lightly.

Bella nodded in a determined fashion and shut the door quickly. I waited to hear the key click in the lock and the dead bolt drive home before turning back to the trees.

The sun had disappeared behind the suburban houses, sending the street into an odd amber glow. Everything looked surreal in the strange shade of dark orange. I knew that Sam and Paul wouldn't arrive fore watch out until much later. If anything were to happen it would be between me and _him_.

The trees rustled menacingly in the slight breeze. Then they moved again, shuffling in a way that couldn't possibly be caused by the wind. "Gotcha" I breathed as I stepped towards the forest.

A tickle of warning issued down my spine and I stopped mid-step to look around. There in the uppermost window was Bella, her wide eyes looking out the window. Her room was black, her face only visible from the street light that now streamed across her house. I shook my head slowly and mouthed the word, "Please". The next moment her curtains were pulled shut, her face gone from view.

I spun back towards the forest and walked straight towards the source of all our problems.

...

The forest was dark and wet. Everything seemed so alive in the evening breeze. Everything. Except _him. _The stone white figure ran ahead of me, body whizzing through the trees. I knew I would never be able to keep up in human form.

I slipped out of my clothes and phased. My wolf self seemed more at home here in the forest. I could feel my fur ruffling in the wind. All my senses were automatically heightened. I could see the sharp movement of every leaf in that forest. Every breath of wind was cool against my overheated fur. Sounds of dripping water, creaking branches were magnified beyond what I would usually hear.

I focussed on my senses, honing them in. There it was; the sound of stone feet pounding on the ground ten times faster than an average human, the taste of leech thick on my tongue, the smell of_ his _sweet aroma as it oozed a trail through the forest.

I began to run, following the horrid scent through the trees. Soon enough I caught up to the darting figure. _He_ zigzagged back and forth, missing the oncoming trees by mere inches. I sped up and pounced. My whole body followed, gliding through the air. I set my paws with claws visible, readying myself for the capture. But just as I came to land on top of _him_,_ he_ scurried away, circling back in the direction _he_ had come. I landed with a huff on all four paws, skidding to a halt.

Frustrated, I began to run again. I caught up quickly, my wolf speed giving me the advantage I needed. I was tailing _him_, following _his_ every swerve and jump as _he_ attempted to mislead me. I wasn't about to be made a fool of. This vampire was going down.

I put on a sudden spurt of speed and sprinted past _him_. I stopped right in front of _his_ path, causing _him_ to stop in his tracks.

For the first time in my life I saw what I believed to be a scared Vampire. _He_ looked worse for wear. _His_ eyes were hollow and dark. _His_ irises huge and hungry. Dark shadows had formed around _his_ sunken eyes giving _him_ the appearance of being tired and overwhelmed.

_His_ hair was more dishevelled than normal. It was dirty and knotted, making_ him_ look like the animal _he_ was. _His_ clothes were another thing. _His_ chest was bare, revealing his bright white skin, glowing in the dark forest. _He_ wore plain black pants, baggy and torn in places. They hung low on _his_ shallow hips. _His_ feet were bare and encrusted with dirt.

_His_ mouth hung open, _his_ fangs bared in defence. A sharp hiss escaped from _his_ lips, warning me not to come any closer.

"Gotcha" I thought as a growl reverberated through me.

"Do you really think so?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. "Don't you think it more likely that I've got you?"

I growled in response. I always hated it when he read my mind. This was the man- no- the _thing_ that had hurt my Bella. He would pay for everything. I would make him feel her pain. "Stay out of my head, bloodsucker" I thought sharply.

"Fine" He said "But how do you suppose we have a civilized conversation when you're a wolf incapable of speech?"

"Who said anything about having a civilized conversation?" I growled as I took a menacing step towards him.

"Why do you think I'm here? I'm not so stupid as to walk straight into a one-on-one fight with a werewolf" said Edward innocently

"You could have fooled me, Leech. Anyway, why should I care why your here? Every time you turn up you leave Bella in pain. Why should this time be any different?"

Edwards eyes widened in surprise. "I...I caused her pain?" He asked, obviously distressed by the idea.

"What do you think happened when you left? She was completely lost to herself. She crawled into her own mind and didn't come out for months. She blamed herself for what you did to her. Didn't you think about the consequences of your actions Leech? With everything you've put her through I should kill you where you stand"

"I have always thought about the consequences of my actions" he whispered darkly "That's why I left in the first place"

"Explain yourself, Bloodsucker. My patience is wearing thin" I had never felt so much hatred for one person. It took all the control I had not to pounce then and there.

"I wanted her to lead a normal life." He said slowly "She wanted so much to become like me. She asked me to change her, you know?"

I growled at the thought.

"Ah, I see you agree with me. I didn't want to change her. I didn't want her to become what I am. I don't want this life for her. Never growing, never changing. It does things to you. It cuts you deeper than any human experience ever could. I would have given anything to see her grow old, bear children and lead a normal life without the aspect of death looming over her shoulder." He took a deep breath.

From what I knew about Vampires, they didn't need to breathe. I decided that he simply needed the time it gave him, more so than the oxygen itself. I remained silent.

"I gave up everything." he continued "I broke off our relationship that day. You have no idea how much it hurt me to leave her standing in these woods alone. Every step I took away from her felt wrong. I couldn't stand it, yet I had to bear the pain, for her."

He paused, looking drained and whiter than his usual pallor "You don't understand how much pain I've been through trying to live without her. If it were possible for someone of my kind to die, I surely would have. She was my essence of being. To think that I hurt her by leaving just makes it all so much worse. She was supposed to move on, like any other human. But I should have known that she wouldn't. She isn't like any of the humans I've ever met. Why would she start being like them now?"

Edward covered his face with his hands, running them back through his hair to grasp at the roots. I could see that he was hurting. Something changed in me then. I didn't feel hate, but understanding. I knew where he was coming from. If I had been in the same situation I'm sure I would have done the same.

"I would have done it too" I confessed "I would have given up my whole life, my whole sense of being if I thought she would benefit from it"

Edward looked up at me, his eyes sad "Thankyou, for everything. You understand because you did the same thing, didn't you? When we were together you stood to the side. You loved her yet you backed down because you believed she'd be happier with me. And when I left her alone and vulnerable, you cared for her. You made her whole again. I am grateful for that"

"Don't think for a second that I'm giving her up just because you've come back on the scene, Leech. More has happened between us than I dare to tell you"

Edwards's eyebrows furrowed. His eyes glazed over. I attempted to lock down my thoughts but in doing so the exact thing I didn't want him to know resurfaced to the top of my mind.

"She's your imprint" He said quietly, his eyes refocussing.

"Yes" I sighed in defeat.

"Does she know?"

I nodded, keeping my thoughts safe from him.

"I see. Well, thankyou"

"What?" I asked confused. "You're not fighting this?"

This time it was Edward who stayed silent. He shook his head slowly.

"Why?" I asked

"Because I left her so that she could lead an ordinary life. You can give her that. You can marry her, raise your children with her, you can even die with her" I stiffened at that, but he continued "You can give her so much more than I ever could. And I can see now that of all the people she could have ended up with, I'm glad its you. You can keep her safe"

I had no idea what to say. Edward was actually giving in. He was giving up. Bella was my imprint, my girl forever more.

"I will keep her safe. I have for this long, and I'm not about to give up"

"Yes, I know. I saw two of your kind patrolling the border the other night. No doubt they were looking out for Victoria and Laurent"

"You know about that?"

"I've been tracking them for the last year. It was what kept me sane while I was away. If I couldn't keep her safe first hand I thought that by tracking down those who wanted to kill her I would be making up for my absence. I followed them here, but lost the trail as soon as I hit Forks. Your scent masks most others. The stench of a wolf can cover almost any other track."

"Good to know" I thought smugly

Edward's mouth pulled into a half smile and continued "I want to help to keep her safe, Jacob. Please let me stay. I will keep out of her life, but at least let me track down Victoria with you. I need to do this"

"How could you help?"

"I just contacted Alice. She said that she hasn't seen anything that Victoria's planning. That makes me think that she's got something big up her sleeve. It's not like her just to give up. You are going to need all the help you can get."

I thought about it. It sure would be handy to have one of them on our side. And if Edward kept to his word and didn't interfere in Bella's life then it would be better for them to be able to catch Victoria and Laurent sooner rather than later.

"Deal" I said, holding out a hand. Edward shook it in agreement.

"Thank you. It would be my fault if they got to her. I can't let that happen"

"It's not going to" I said simply.

It was a strange world. Who would have ever thought we would come to this. A werewolf and a Vampire working together for a single cause.

...

"Bella?" I asked cautiously, knocking on the front door "Bella, love it's me". There was no answer. I walked around the house, trying to open the windows and doors, but true to her word Bella had locked them all.

When I had circled all the way around to the front I remembered her bedroom window.

I climbed swiftly up the large tree outside her window as I had done countless times before. It felt mechanical, as though my body had memorised each jump and step.

When I swung over to her closed window I saw that the curtains were still closed. "Bella" I whispered as I sat crouched on her window sill "Let me in" Again, there was no answer.

"Damn it" I cursed.

Having an idea, I stretched up to my full extent and grabbed onto the roof of the house. I pulled myself up onto the tiles, scrambling slightly to bring my legs over the edge.

I walked carefully to the other side of the house, making sure not to slip on any loose tiles, and lay on my stomach to steady my centre of gravity. Hanging over the edge of the roof I saw another window. "Fingers crossed" I thought as I reached out to grasp at the wood.

It slid open easily "Thank your lucky stars that I'm not a bloodthirsty Vampire" I thought as I clambered down, over the edge of the roof to slide in through the open window.

The room was completely dark. I walked straight ahead with my hands outstretched, hoping to find the door. I had only walked a few steps however when I bumped straight into the edge of something hard.

As my eyes became accustomed to the dark I saw the outline of a dressing table. It was old and worn and adorned with picture frames. As I looked closer I saw that every image posed a tiny brown haired girl, smiling widely from somewhere in the frame. She was climbing a tree, riding a bike or sitting atop her father's shoulders. I realised that this must have been Charlie's room and, feeling as though I was intruding on something personal, I felt my way alongside the dressing table until I cam into contact with a smooth wall.

I ran my hands along the wall until I found a door handle. I turned and pulled it open, escaping from Charlie's bedroom into the hall.

I walked quickly to Bella's room and opened the door. It was pitch black in her room as well. "Bella?" I called quietly. There was no reply. I walked into her room, looking around, and my wolf vision taking in everything it could.

I couldn't see Bella anywhere. As I turned to leave the room and search somewhere else I heard a small intake of breath come from the wardrobe. It was so quiet I could have sworn it was just my imagination playing games with me, but deciding to check it out anyway I walked over to the large wooden doors.

As the wardrobe creaked open I heard her gasp as she huddled tighter against the back corner. Bella sat curled into a tight ball, her eyes wide and fearful. "Bells, it's just me" I said.

"Thank God" she whispered tearfully, reaching her arms out so I could help her up.

As soon as she was out of the wardrobe she threw herself into my arms "I was so scared" she cried, shaking in my arms. "I hid myself, just like you wanted"

"You did well, Bells, thankyou"

"Did you find anything?"

Whilst I was on the verge of telling her the truth I decided against it. She was too fragile at the moment. Any mention of Edward would throw her over the edge. I knew that I shouldn't be keeping secrets from her, but the time would come to tell her eventually.

"No, it was just a possum" I lied. "You're safe"

Bella's arms constricted around my neck as she lifted her face to mine, pressing our foreheads together. "How did you get in?" She asked "I thought all the windows and doors were locked"

"It seems that you missed one, love"

"Oh, whoops" she said "At least there wasn't any real danger this time"

"Think of it as a drill. We'll get it right when it counts"

Bella nodded and stretched up to catch my lips with hers.

"When it counts" she promised.

The familiar fire I felt at her touch ignited within me as she ran her hands down my arms and up my chest. Her lips were soft and urgent against mine, so I kissed her back, showing her just how much I needed her.

I curled my arms around her waist, surrendering as she pushed me backwards. I let her guide me until my knees met the edge of the bed and my legs collapsed. As I flopped down onto the mattress her body followed, nestled closely to mine.

"Jake" she breathed between kisses "stay"

"Always" I promised, and pulled her up to lie next to me on her pillow. I knew that we wouldn't take any further steps in our physical relationship tonight. Just being close was enough for me. Perhaps our depressing situation didn't mean the loss of _all _the things an empty house had to offer.

_So guys, I'm __going to go back to sleep now. My head is pounding like mad, but I hope you enjoyed that chapter. I don't usually write 'action-y' stuff. Any thoughts on what's going to happen? Please review :)_

_Sweet dreams and revelations,_

_lee-leerose xx_


	25. Leavin'

_Sick, again._

_Burning up a fever and dizzy as anything. Kind of stressed out though. Exams are coming up and I'm missing school , not to mention a chem, biol, french AND maths test that I will have to catch up on :s_

_Anyways, it means another chapter for you guys, so here it is._

_Song by Jesse McCartney. Steph Meyer owns Twilight._

_Lee-leerose xx_

**Chapter 26: Leavin'**

"And that's time. Please ensure that your name is on all your papers and put your pens down" squawked the short, plump lady at the front of the gym.

I let out a sigh of relief as I put down the pen for my last exam. I was finally finished. Leaning back in my chair I looked down the rows of chairs and desks to see Angela waving at me. I smiled back as she mouthed "How did you go?". I gave her the thumbs up and she smiled wildly before returning the gesture.

"Are you deaf, Newton? I said PENS DOWN!"

I turned in my chair to see the short, bad-tempered examination lady leaning menacingly across Mike's desk. Mike dropped the pen instantly and sunk down into his seat. I stifled a giggle as the woman shot Mike a death glare, collected up his papers and turned away with a huff of disapproval.

Mike saw me then. He shrugged his shoulders, brushing off the incident and smiled. I smiled back and turned back just in time to have my papers collected as well.

"Okay" Said the woman once all the papers were collected "you may leave now, in a nice orderly fashion!" There was an uproar of voices as chairs scraped against the gymnasium floor. Students flocked to the doors which lead outside, silencing the screaming examination woman "Order! Order, I say!"

I followed the sea of students outside into the sunlight. As everyone dispersed to their corresponding cars I searched the crowd for that familiar set of deep brown eyes.

It wasn't too hard to find him. Jake's huge build meant that he stood out against the swarm of scrawny teenagers that surrounded him.

I ran straight at him, my arms clasping at his shoulders as he grabbed my waist and lifted me up into the air. "I'm free!" I said, throwing my head back in victory. Jake lowered me to my feet slowly, laughing at my dramatic scene. "That you are" he agreed, holding me tightly around the waist.

"How was it?" he asked, concerned. He knew that Chemistry was my worst subject.

"Not too badly" I said "I know I got parts of the stoichiometric equations wrong and I wasn't sure about a few of the multi-choice questions, but other than that I think I passed"

"Excellent" he said. "Now we should go out for a celebratory lunch"

"And where in Forks could we possibly go out for lunch?" I teased

"Well, actually I have a confession to make" Jake said, ducking his head "I've already planned for us to have lunch with Charlie. He's going to meet us at the diner"

"Gosh, how romantic"

"C'mon Bells, I got to share you around _sometimes_. Trust me, I would much rather have you all to myself, but somehow I don't see your father taking too kindly to that"

I sighed in defeat "You're right. But this had better not become a regular thing with you. I enjoy my 'Jacob time' too much to give it up"

"Yes, I've noticed" said Jake. I elbowed his ribs, knowing I wouldn't hurt him with my weak gesture. Jake milked it for all it was worth though, gasping theatrically and raising his hands in surrender "Fine, fine. I promise you'll still get your 'Jacob time'"

"That's better" I played along, laughing. "Now, let's not keep my father waiting"

...

We were going to be late for lunch. But what made it worse was that as fast as Jake tried to push my truck he never got anywhere over 40. "Jeez Bells, why didn't you tell me the truck needed a check up? When was the last time you got it serviced?"

"Well, actually now I'm the one with a confession." Jake eyed me suspiciously until I let it spill "I've never taken the truck in for a service"

"What?" Jake seemed horrified "Never?"

"No, the last time it saw a spanner or anything of the sort was when it was being restored in your shed." Jake ran a hand through his hair in disbelief "I didn't think it would need a service, not when it was rebuilt by you" I defended.

Jake laughed "Just because I'm good at fixing things doesn't make me a super mechanic." He paused, thinking "I can book it in for a check up after graduation next week. I'll drive you home, then keep going back to my place with the truck. Hopefully it'll still be in one piece by then"

"Thankyou" I said, squeezing his hand "I don't know what I'd do without the truck. We've been through a lot together"

Jake smiled "Yea well, just don't forget who saved its life next time you have 'Jacob time'" I rolled my eyes and squeezed his hand tighter

I laughed "'Jacob time'?"

"Yea" said Jake, unabashed "The time you spend with me that you seem to enjoy so much"

"Okay" I said, rolling my eyes "So are we having 'Jacob time' in the truck now" I asked innocently.

"Maybe we should get the windows tinted" Jake hinted. I hit his hand playfully. "Or maybe not." He amended, a small grin plastered across his face.

...

Charlie was already sitting in his spot by the time we reached the diner. He was halfway through a can of his favourite beer and leant back luxuriously in his cushioned booth.

"Hey Bells. Hey Jake" he greeted when he saw us enter. I took Jake's hand and led him over to where my dad sat.

"Hey dad" I said.

"Charlie" Jake greeted, nodding.

"Sit down guys" Charlie ushered as he raised his hand to call over the waitress. I took a quick look at the menu, and then handed it to Jake to let him decide what he wanted to order.

The waitress smiled sweetly while we all placed our orders. After Charlie was satisfied that I would be eating more than just a 'pathetic caeser salad' she left, her smile disappearing instantly.

Conversation was minimal while we ate. Charlie asked how my exams had gone and I answered politely. To make small talk I mentioned the incident with Mike Newton. "And I always thought he was a bright kid" Charlie stated. "I guess looks can be deceiving". Jake and Charlie found their common interest in cars and mechanics. I never knew Charlie to be the rev-head type, but he surprised me by noting important features on the new porche model.

Meanwhile, I stared out the window of the diner, watching as couples strode past in the mid-day sun, hand-in-hand. Some seemed to be so deep in conversation I was sure they wouldn't notice if someone started screaming that the end of the world had come. Others seemed less intense, simply looking at the ground or the sky, day-dreaming about places they would rather be.

I wondered which Jake and I looked like. I liked to think that we were more like the first, so absorbed in each other that we didn't notice anything else around us. However, the way these couples were talking looked like they were almost too eager. They would run out of things to say very quickly. Jake and I already knew everything about each other. That was the beauty of having a best friend turned boyfriend. We could just look at one another and have a conversation. There was no need for words. We knew each other so well we could finish one another's sentences and carry on as if it were completely natural.

That was what Jake and I were; natural. That was how we differed from other teenagers our age. Some may argue that our 'natural' relationship comes from the imprinting, but I didn't think so. I believed that even without the magic of imprinting, Jake and I would have fallen in love anyway. Why? Because we were two parts of a whole. We fit together so well one simply couldn't exist without the other. There was no other way to say it. We were simply in love.

I was pulled from my contemplation by Jake's hand gently squeezing mine. "Ready to go?" he asked. I nodded.

After paying the bill (which Jake insisted he paid in full since he was the one who invited us out) Jake and I got in the truck while Charlie got in his cruiser. "Bye dad" I called "See you tonight"

"See ya Bells. Love you"

"Love you too" Both vehicles pulled out and drove off in their separate directions.

...

**JPOV**

I was waiting in the forest near Bella's house. He had to be around her somewhere. I could smell his scent fresh on the wind.

There was the slightest sound, a leaf cracking underfoot. I spun around and saw Edward standing before me. His appearance had changed since the other day. The biggest difference was his eyes. They were no longer the black they had been the last time I had seen him. Now they were a liquid topaz, shining like gold in the sun that streamed through the trees. They were no longer rimmed with dark circles and seemed less shallow. He still wore no shirt, but he had changed his pants to a dark brown pair of the same design as the last.

"Jacob" he said in a way of greeting

"Edward" I replied, sizing him up. My whole body shook as I fought back the change.

"It's okay. I'm on your side, Jacob" Edward spoke calmly and rationally. "I'm here to help Bella" I felt my whole body become still at his words. My wolfish instincts were gone. We were no longer vampire and wolf, we were just men.

"I need to tell you something" I said slowly "The other day I caught the scent of something in Bella's room. It was definitely of your kind"

"Victoria?" asked Edward, his ferocity seeping through his composure.

"No" I said quickly "Nor was it the male, Laurent. It was someone I've never met. I thought that perhaps you may know them."

"I can't see why any passer through would want to go through her room. It can't be a coincidence"

"No, I thought the same thing. It has to have something to do with Victoria, but what?"

"I have no idea" Edwards said "Do you mind if I enter the house. I will have to smell it for myself to see if I know them"

"Of course, but the scent is days old now. Will you still be able to tell who it is?"

Edward smirked "Vampires can pick up the scent of something weeks after it was there. I should be able to pick up something from a few days ago"

"Impressive, bloodsucker" I said. "The house will be empty from 6 to 9 tonight. You should be able to have a clear idea of the Vampire's scent by then, shouldn't you?"

"Absolutely" Edward said "But may I ask where everyone is going?" His voice, although hard, cracked a little. I could tell he was still hurting. As much as he needed to let Bella go, he still wanted her kept safe.

"Graduation" I said simply "It was her last day of school today"

"Oh" said Edward. His eyes were unfocussed, as though he were in some other place entirely "How did her exams go?"

"Good. Her best mark was in Literature. 87 percent. Then Biology, of course. She got 85 percent in that."

"Of course." Edward smiled at some far off memory, then refocussed back on me "Thankyou, Jacob. Thankyou" And with that he disappeared into the trees.

**BPOV**

It was 2 hours until Graduation and I still wasn't ready. I stood staring at my wardrobe wondering what on earth I was going to wear. The red silk top and high waisted black skirt that I had planned on wearing seemed to have disappeared. I couldn't seem to find them anywhere. I had even looked through the dirty washing in the laundry and the pile of discarded clothes at the bottom of my cupboard, but I still couldn't find them.

I flicked through the coat hangers, contemplating different colours and patterns. That black skirt really had been my only option for tonight. I only owned one other skirt, and it was a floor length khaki design which I didn't deem appropriate for this occasion.

Finally, I came to the last hanger in the wardrobe. It was the blue dress I had worn out on my first date with Jake. Perhaps not the most practical piece, but it would have to do.

I set it out on my bed along with matching shoes and the appropriate underwear before leaving to shower. I took my time, washing my hair, shaving my legs and scrubbing my skin. I revelled in the different aromas that each soap issued on my skin. The shampoo and conditioner was berry scented and reminded me of the summer heat I missed so much. After that the bathroom filled with the scent of honey-lemon as I shaved my legs. The cream was smooth and luscious, reminding me of hot tea on a cold winter's night. The last, my fresh air scented body wash, reminded me of Jake. Although I wasn't sure that it was the perfect replica of 'fresh air' it was the perfect replica of what it felt like to be free, just like how I felt when I was with Jake.

I turned off the shower and stepped out of the tub. Drying off quickly I wrapped the towel around my tiny frame and went to get changed.

As I re-entered my room however, I found that I wasn't alone. "Jake" I said, stunned by his sudden appearance "what are you doing her?" Jake looked up from where he lay on my bed.

"I thought I was driving you to graduation" He said

"But" I contradicted "It's only 4 o'clock"

"So?" he asked

"Sooooo, I'm not ready yet"

"I'll wait" he shrugged and lay back on my pillow, his hands behind his head.

I half growled in frustration "Jake, I'm not getting changed with you in my room"

"Well, I'm not leaving" Jake argued "Charlie's still here. How do you think he'd react if he saw me leaving your room? Not to mention if he then came in to ask you why I was here and found you standing there all wet, clad in nothing but a towel?"

I stamped my foot "Damn it Jacob. I hate it when you're right"

"Yea, but you still love me" he grinned up at me as I glared down at him.

"Again, your right" I sighed. "At least avert your eyes...actually, get in the cupboard" I said, storming over to the bed and grabbing him by the arm. I pulled him up and shoved him lightly in the direction of the wardrobe.

"What?" he asked, perplexed

"I said get in the cupboard. I won't take long"

Jake cocked his head to the side and eyed me standing there in my towel, which I just realised didn't cover much more than the essentials. "You place a lot of trust in your boyfriend"

"Just get in there" I sighed, pushing him towards the open door. He stepped inside, but just before I could shut the door he put his hand out to hold it open.

"You're so hot when you're mad" he said, reaching out to run a thumb across my cheek.

"More than I can say about you when you're cocky" I said, taking him by surprise. His hand fell from my cheek and I took the opportunity to shut the wardrobe door.

"You don't play fair" came Jake's dejected voice from behind the door.

"Neither do you. Telling me that I'm hot when I'm mad was not called for" I huffed back as I slipped out of my towel and into my underwear.

"Excuse me; I wasn't the one standing sopping wet in front of my boyfriend wearing nothing but a towel. I do believe that comment was close to gentlemanly considering the situation."

"Oh come on Jake. I didn't ask you to come while I was changing. I asked you to pick me up for Graduation, which I may remind you starts at 6, not 4" I slipped on my dress, letting it fall over my breasts and hips as if it were made for me.

"I thought you might like some 'Jacob time'" he said from inside the wardrobe, "But obviously I was wrong"

I stretched my arms around my back, trying to zip up the back, but I couldn't seem to reach. I sighed as I realised that I would need help. And who else to help but..."Jake" I groaned as I attempted once again to pull at the frustrating zip.

"Yea" He said, sounding upset

"Can you help me zip this up?" I asked, letting my hands fall to my sides in defeat.

"Does this mean I get to come out of the cupboard?" He sounded a little amused

"Of course"

The wardrobe door cracked open a little and Jake's eyes peered around the corner. "Wow, I never thought that coming out of the cupboard would be so illuminating" he joked

"Help? Please" I said, turning so that I faced away from Jake.

I heard his steps as he neared, stopping just behind me. My heartbeat sped as it always did at the thought of Jake being this close to me. His breath flowed in warm streaks over my neck making me knees feel like jelly.

I felt the dress tighten and come into shape around me as Jake zipped up the back. Slowly, but surely he moved the zipper all the way up to the top and fastened the catch. "Thankyou" I whispered as his arms wound around my waist.

"My pleasure" he spoke, his voice low and rough "I really do love that dress on you."

"Jake?" I asked tentatively

"Bella"

"Can I have my 'Jacob time' now?" I could feel Jakes body shake as he laughed behind me.

"Are you sure you still want me?" He asked, his voice dead serious "I mean, I did just come out of the cupboard"

I rolled my eyes "You can be so immature sometimes" I said, turning in his arms so I could look straight into his eyes.

"But you love me none-the-less"

"Wrong" I said, and laughed lightly when Jake's face fell." That's one of the many reasons _why_ I love you"

Jake's face turned into a grin as he took my lips with his.

...

**EPOV**

(later that evening)

There was something odd about climbing through Bella's window that seemed extremely odd. Although had done it so many times in the past it seemed like second nature, I couldn't help but feel wrong about it.

Maybe it was the way her room had changed. Upon entry I noticed the missing fairy lights that used to hang above her bed all that time ago. Her old clunky computer had been replaced by a shiny new laptop. Even her walls, which had been covered with numerous pictures of family and friends, were now void of any form of art. The only picture in the room was that which sat on her bedside table. The tiny frame held a picture of a much younger Jacob and Bella, holding hands at the park.

The other thing I noticed was the change in smell. Bella's aroma remained the same fresh scent, lemon honey and morning dew. However, now it was mixed with something else. The whole room smelt of woods and dirt. The dogs scent lingered on the air. It consumed every inch of the room, making it unbearable to think.

That could have been me. If I had stayed I could have still been in her life. But I couldn't. I knew that what I had done was best for her. Bella could never be hurt, but that's exactly what I did to her. I hurt her beyond repair. Every aspect of her life had changed when I had left.

The only thing I could think of to justify all our pain and suffering was that she would never have to become like me. There were only two possible paths that your life could take when your boyfriend was of my kind. Become a Vampire, or die. I liked to think that by leaving Bella I had given her the life I had always wanted for her. The life she could never have with me.

Jacob could give her all that. He could love her as an equal, emotionally and physically. I could never take that step with her. She would always be in danger with me around. But Jacob, he was the perfect replacement. His strength meant that he could keep her safe while his imprinting meant that he would love her as deeply as anyone ever could.

Her life could continue as normal humans would, with the exception of having a werewolf as a boyfriend. Jacob could be her boyfriend, without any exception to the word 'boy'. He could care for her until the day she needed more. Then he could marry her, take her on her honeymoon and love her as any husband should be able to love his wife.

They could have children; something unimaginable for a Vampire. Jacob would be a wonderful father. They could raise their children knowing that no-one craved for their blood, that no-one wanted to kill them.

Jacob and Bella could age and grow old together. They would see each other as they were, with no masks of youth or 100 years of lies. They would see each other exactly as they were, at 80 or even 90 years of age. And when the day came for one to let go of the other, they could pass without guilt or fear. For they would know that even in death they would be together. Both lives would pass on to the next eventually. It was only a matter of waiting.

I came to realise that Bella now had the best life possible. Even if I couldn't be in it with her, at least I could give her that chance. Now she had the chance to live.

Refocussing on the task at hand I pushed all thoughts of Bella and Jake out of my mind. Their scents evaporated, leaving behind another, strangely wild one. It was time to start tracking.

...

**BPOV**

"Well done Bella" Jake congratulated me proudly.

It was after the Graduation ceremony and we were walking back to the truck. Jake had one arm around my waist; the other gripped my graduation cap, which he had retrieved for me when I, along with everyone else had thrown them into the air. I held my graduation certificate in one hand while my other arm hung around Jake.

"At least I didn't trip" I said "That would have been embarrassing"

Jake helped me into the passenger seat of the truck. "Yes, I would have never let you live that down"

"And here I was thinking that my boyfriend might comfort me by saying something along the lines of 'oh no, you could never be that clumsy'"

Jake raised an eyebrow at me "Yea, yea I know" I said "That would be lying"

Jake laughed, shutting the door. He climbed into the drivers seat and turned the keys. The truck roared to life. The whole cabin shook wildly. "I'm glad you're giving my baby a service. She really needs it"

"Don't count your chickens before they've hatched" Jake warned as he backed out from the schools car park "She hasn't gotten us home yet"

...

JPOV

We pulled up outside Bella's house. I turned off the engine and the whole world was plunged into the dark. For a moment neither one of us moved. We only sat there in silence. It wasn't awkward. Nothing could ever be awkward between Bella and I, but this was just a moment where we could be together without interruptions.

I was thinking about Edward. He had been in Bella's room tonight. Would Bella notice? Had he touched anything? My head told me that he would never do a thing like that, but my heart told me a different story. He had been away from her for so long. He would want to relive the past. Perhaps it had been foolish to throw him straight into the deep end. Maybe I should have eased him into the reality of things slower than this.

Bella's room would have been filled with her scent as well as mine. How much control could one vampire have? What if he didn't really approve of our relationship? What if he had been lying about being happy that Bella had moved on? She was already so fragile. If he did anything to try to break us apart I couldn't see Bella surviving. She had already come so far. Was he about to rewind all her hard work?

Questions swam around my head until Bella broke the silence, her sweet voice cracking through the air like candy. "Thanks for the lift Jake" she said.

"No problem" I replied, toying with the keys that still hung from the ignition. "I'll return the truck in a couple of days. I should have her fixed up by then"

"Are you sure she'll make it back to your place?"

"She should"

I could feel Bella next to me as she leant over the centre console. Her hand brushed at my cheek. I closed my eyes at the feeling of her skin on mine. Just that one small touch sent my skin sparking as though an electric current has passed through me.

"Are you sure she won't break down?" Bella leant closer. I could feel her warm breath fan across my cheek as she hovered close to me. This was new and dangerous water. I had never experienced a Bella this forward. She had always been the shy one. Apparently not tonight though.

"I don't know" I could barely form a coherent sentence, not with Bella this close, whispering into my ear. A shiver cascaded down my spine as she moved her hand beneath my chin. She turned my head slowly towards hers.

"Look at me, Jake" I did as she said, opening my eyes to see her, inches away. Her eyes were pleading.

All I had to do was turn away. It couldn't be that hard, could it? But how could I resist her. She was my everything, my world and she was asking for me.

Giving in, I leant forwards to press my lips against hers. Bella reacted instantly, bringing her arms up to cling around my neck. Against my better judgement I grabbed at her waist, pulling her further across the centre console. She kissed me now with more emotion than ever. Worry, need and anger seeped through her passion, stinging my heart with every touch. I wanted to kiss away those emotions. I wanted to absorb them from her.

Bella's hands moved into my hair as I began to trail my fingers up and down her spine. She pressed her body into me, moving so that she was completely clear of the centre console. We took up one seat, me sitting while she knelt on the worn leather.

Just when I broke away to allow her to breathe she spoke the words I wished she would never say. "Stay" she whispered "stay with me" She leant back in to kiss my lips but I weaved out of the way. Bella was not to be put off however; satisfying herself by planting small kisses along my jaw line and down my neck. "Bells" my voice broke "You know I want to, but I can't"

"Why?" her voice was nothing but a breath as she continued to assault my neck.

"Charlie's home" I said, as though the most obvious thing in the world.

"And?" she said, now nibbling at the skin beneath my ear.

Whoa. Who was this femme fatale and what had she done with my sweet Bella? This was way too new. It felt like forbidden territory. I needed to slow this down.

"_And_ he won't approve of what you're asking me to do"

Bella's lips paused on my neck as she pulled back. Her eyes saddened and brows furrowed "You don't like _this kind_ of 'Jacob time', do you?"

"No Bells, you're wrong. I like it far too much"

Bella's eyes widened in surprise "Then what's the problem?"

I sighed "This isn't_ you_, love. You would never be this forward"

"Oh" said Bella, her face dropping.

"What's the matter Bells? Something's worrying you"

Bella lifted her gaze to capture mine. Her eyes were glistening with tears as they threatened to flow down her cheeks. "I just...I need you. That's all. I can't be alone. With everything that's going on I can't...I won't..." A tear escaped as Bella dropped her face once more.

My heart sunk. How could I have been so stupid? She was right, as always. These were dangerous times. She needed me here and I was going off to fix this stupid truck.

"I thought that maybe if I...if I changed a...a little. You might st...stay"

"Come here" I said, holding out my arms. Bella fell straight into them, finding the place where she belonged. Her trembling breath slowed as I held her, stroking her hair. Her tears turned into light sniffles before stopping completely. "You don't need to change for me. You _never_ need to change for me. Do you understand?"

Bella nodded into my chest.

We sat there for a while, listening to our synchronised breathing. Her heart beat against my chest while the sound of our breathing calmed us.

"Bells. We should go inside. Charlie will be home soon." Bella nodded, but didn't move. She was completely fatigued. It seemed that all that stress had finally gotten to her. "Hold onto me" I instructed. As I curled my arms under her shoulders and knees, Bella slid her tired arms around my neck and held on limply. I kicked the door open and slid out, aiming another kick at the hunk of metal to close it.

I walked Bella to the door and carefully arranged her in my arms so that I could grab the key from my pocket and unlock the door. I carried Bella over the threshold and up the stairs into the hall. I could hear the shower running which told me that Charlie had beaten us home. I carried Bella into her bedroom and carefully shut the door.

When I attempted to place her gently on the bed her grip tightened around my neck. "No, Jake. Don't go" her voice was barely audible, even in the silent house.

"I'm not going anywhere, love. I just thought I'd let you change out of your clothes without me in the room"

"Oh, okay" she said sleepily and her hands released their iron grip on my collar.

Knowing that I couldn't risk being seen by Charlie I chose not to stand in the hallway. Instead I walked to the window, opened it and climbed out. I pulled myself up onto the roof and lay out on the still warm tiles. The sky was clear except for the few clouds that drifted lazily across the moon. The night was cool, a light breeze tickled the hairs on my skin. After a few moments I heard Bella's door creak open and a familiar male voice issue from beneath where I sat "Bella?"

"Dad! I'm getting changed"

"Oh, sorry" There was a small whoosh of air as Charlie pulled the door closed quickly. "I was just checking that everything was okay"

"I'm fine. Just a bit tired" Bella said. I could hear the rustle of her pyjamas as she pulled them on, her nails on the buttons of her shirt as she hurried to put it on.

"Well, I just want you to know that I was really proud of you today, Bells."

"Thanks dad" Bella said. "I'm going to go to sleep now"

"Okay" said Charlie "Sleep tight. I'll see you in the morning. I love you"

"Love you too" Bella called.

Charlie's footsteps echoed down the hall as he walked away. "Jake?" Bella's voice came questioningly. Within moments I had scurried down the roof and through her window

…

(the next day)

The drive was quiet and uninterrupted, other than the few stutters the truck let out every now and again.

As I drove I thought about everything that had happened. Edward had returned. He was going to help us catch whoever it was who had been in Bella's room. He thought, just as I did, that this sudden appearance of a Vampire couldn't be a coincidence. There was no way that a Vampire who was just passing through would just so happen to stumble across the house of the only girl in the whole town that knew of their existence. The chances would have to be phenomenal if that was the case.

More feasible was the idea that this had something to do with Victoria and Laurent. No doubt Victoria was hatching a plan at this very moment.

Everything I did was for Bella. Every thought that raced through my mind was for her, and I was going to make sure that she stayed out of harms way.

_Okay, so there are some parts of this that I really __like and other parts that I'm not too sure of. Feedback would be fab!_

_Hopefully my brain will stop feeling like it's going to explode so I can fix up parts of this post. It's really long, but I can safely say that this is my last post before my 2 month break. Phew, I just had to get to a point where I could leave you guys. I mean, I would hate to leave you with a cliffy for 2 months. That would just be cruel! Please review :)_

_Sparkles and diamonds,_

_lee-leerose xx_


	26. A Little Too Late

_Hey guys,_

_So, I passed my exams! YAY! Well, *cough* most of them. I only failed maths, which was a given anyways. On a different note I also managed to get this chapter done. Hopefully it's okay. We're really getting into the steam of things now. I can promise you a little more 'action'. Well, not really. But it is more 'actiony' than I usually write. Anyway, enjoy and I'll talk to you at the end :)_

_Disclaimer: Steph Meyer should be crowned as supreme ruler of all. Song by Delta Goodrem (Sorry, I really can't stay away from her music. Every single song inspires another chapter XD)_

_lee-leerose xx_

**Chapter 27: A Little Too Late**

I stood leaning against my window gazing longingly out onto the frosty afternoon. Winter was coming.

Winter in Forks was a solemn affair. Especially for those who, like me, hated the cold and wet. If Forks was rainy for the most part of the year, it was absolutely pouring during winter.

Christmas was always the same. Windy and cold; it was a wonder Santa and his reindeer weren't blown off course. Some years it got so cold that it actually snowed and white coated everything from the rooftops to the trees.

Today was the start of it all. A thin sheet of ice had formed over parts of the roads. The grass and leaves were coated with crystals of frozen dew. Charlie's cruiser had metal chains fastened securely to its wheels, freshly added this morning to make driving in these conditions safer.

A pang of longing shot through me as I stared at the spot where my old Chevy truck should have been. That empty space in the drive made the whole scene seem strange. I had owned the truck for a few years now, and not a day passed when I didn't sit behind it's overly large, bulky wheel or pat it's slightly rusted red bonnet as I walked by.

Jake still had my truck locked up in his shed for maintenance purposes. Apparently it was worse for wear. It had broken down as soon as he had come to a stop in his shed. That was a week ago. He had said that it would take a while to fix, so not to worry if he didn't get it finished within a couple of days.

I not only longed to have my beloved truck back, but I also wanted to see Jake. With Victoria and Laurent looming over our shoulders, as well as the re-emergence of _him_, things in La Push were becoming very strained. Longer shifts had been appointed, and consequently Jacob and I hadn't seen each other for ages. But with no way of transporting myself I had no way of getting to the Reservation. I was as grounded as an emu.

There was always the option of Charlie's cruiser, but I had never really liked the idea of driving around in a car which had 'POLICE' stamped across its doors and bonnet. If that didn't draw enough unneeded attention, then the red and blue lights that protruded proudly from the roof surely would.

I sighed loudly, leaning my elbows against the cold windowsill and cupping my face in my palms. My eyes wandered from Charlie's cruiser, all the way down the drive, as close to the house as possible. There was a small speck of colour in the midst of the dying grass. A rusty red bike leant against the post of our veranda.

My heart began to sing in my chest. If I left now I would make it to La Push just as it got dark. I scurried across the room to snatch my jacket from my bed before leaping out of my room and down the stairs. There was still the possibility that I would be seeing Jacob today.

...

I stood beside the great looming beast, unsure about how to proceed. Jake always made this look so easy. Every time I had seen him ride his motorcycle he had been agile and fast, yet it had been so long since I had last ridden, and even then it hadn't ended well.

I remembered the visions, the swerving, the blood, Jake's shirt...Everything had happened so long ago. My obsession with seeing his 'ghost' and hearing his voice was long gone, yet it was hard to believe how long it had taken me to truly heal. Even the memory of the visions and my original reason for my sudden urge to ride the bike didn't make me collapse in pain anymore. All I felt now was the small and silent tugging against my heart. It was as though it were trying to break the stitches that had sewn it back together. However, it could never break again. The bonds were just too strong. Jake had fixed me up, just as he had promised.

As I stared at the bike a sense of pride rushed through me. I was stronger and better off. I was a new Bella. One who had learnt to live, not just survive.

Well, the first thing was first. If I was really going to do this I needed to do it safely. I reached out and plucked the oversized helmet from where it hung on the handle. Making sure to gather my hair at the nape of my neck I pulled it on. I shook it slightly to make sure it was secure before I pushed my arms through the sleeves of my jacket and shrugged it onto my shoulders. Even though it wasn't leather it was better than nothing.

Now that I was prepared for the ride that stood before me I stepped up beside it and took the handle with a shaking hand. I tugged sharply and pulled it up from its leaning position on the pole so that it stood proudly in front of me.

Breathing deeply I took the other handle and waited a moment. When I had built the sufficient courage I swung my left leg over the red leather seat and planted my foot on the foot rest.

Once I was finally mounted on the bike my mind went blank. I couldn't seem to remember what can next. I came to realise the enormity of the object beneath me. It was so powerful, and I was so fragile.

As though acting on instinct I turned the key in the ignition and felt the thing come to life. It hummed contentedly beneath me, putting away. I lifted my foot and slammed it down on the pedal causing a roar to issue from the beast. I twisted the handle, revving slightly as I sat motionless on the machine.

It was now or never.

I let off the brake carefully and started to move forwards. Moving slowly and carefully I directed myself around Charlie's cruiser and out onto the road. Seemingly having a mind of its own, the bike charged forwards, increasing its speed as it felt bitumen beneath its wheels.

Sooner than I had expected I was out of forks and well on my way to La Push.

It was lucky that I had forgotten to return the bike, really. Otherwise I would have never had the chance to do this again. I had forgotten how exhilarating riding a motorcycle was. Wind swept through my hair as I sped faster down the straight stretch of road. It was the most fantastic feeling in the world. Freedom screamed out at me, willing me to surge forwards with even more force. I obliged and revved the engine over, and over.

The sky was beginning to darken as twilight set in. The sun sunk low on the horizon as I charged towards the ocean, La Push, and Jacob. The light flitted off the areas of ice which were still visible on the road. The air was frosty, biting the skin on my hands as the wind whipped over me.

I regretted not wearing gloves as my hands were at the point of freezing. However there was an upside to this. I could just imagine Jake's indignation of me forgetting the simplest of items. He would pity me, and hold my hands between his scorching palms. They would warm me in no time.

I brought my attention back to the road. Trees zoomed past on either side. They seemed to morph into each other, barely discernable in the enclosing darkness.

That was when I saw it, a pair of great shining eyes issuing from the darkness. It wasn't the fact that they were staring straight at me that scared me, but rather their colour. Red would have been welcomed, as Victoria and Laurent really were the least of my problems at the moment. No, these eyes were a liquid topaz in colour. They swam with warmth, memories, and my greatest fears.

I became captivated with them. My eyes locked with _his_ as my head whipped around in what felt to be slow motion. Before I knew what was happening the bike was slipping from its grip on the road. I had hit the ice. I felt the smooth road turn to crumbling dirt . The bike rocketed from side to side as the handlebars swivelled wildly beneath my strained grip.

With a jerk and shudder the bike turned suddenly, bucking me off. I was flying through the air and with a loud shriek I hit a tree. I felt a sharp pain issue from my arm with the impact. Half a second later a huge object landed on top of me. The metal of the bike cut into my leg and hip. The pressure was unbearable. I could feel my eyes begin to water as the pain took over.

I stared up at the night sky, dotted with tiny bulbs of light as well as huge splodges of colour. My head was swimming as I attempted to pull myself from beneath the heavy bike. I whimpered as the metal scraped across my bruised skin. I screamed out, but there was no answer. My head was pounding, willing me to give in. I screamed again. My throat felt as though it were on fire. Every nerve was ablaze as I attempted to move from beneath the bike.

I made to sit up but every movement caused pain to shoot through my injured arm. I collapsed to the ground in a huff. Looking down I saw the blood from where skin had contacted with bitumen and gravel. The angle of my arm looked odd and out of place. "Help me" I whispered to the darkness "Help...help" I said as the darkness enveloped my senses.

...

**JPOV**

Everyday, with no exception, we had a full pack meeting. The topic of choice: Vampires. Not only were Victoria and Laurent on our minds, but also Edward Cullen. His sudden reappearance had sent fear into our hearts. After informing Sam of our recent agreement he had started rallying the forces in case of a fight.

Now that there was a Cullen back in town, the treaty had been reinstated. All the old rules applied and we could not afford to lapse in our judgements for the possibility of war.

Personally, I was more concerned about the effect this would have on Bella. She knew he had visited, however, she didn't know that he was still in town. She also did not know about our recent pact to protect her.

I was nervous to see her again. It had really been far too long. We hadn't seen each other since after graduation.

I sat listening to the voice of authority in our pack. Sam was our leader. His word was like that of God. It must be followed, or else one would suffer the consequences.

Another problem was that of the stray vampire who had wandered through Bella's room. Until I could see Edward again to discuss what he had discovered in Bella's room on graduation night, the pack had no idea how to proceed. The only thing we could hope for was that our strengths at the border would frighten off whatever, or whoever it was.

Sam was issuing a new roster for this week. We were concentrating our efforts on keeping the vampires out of the area. Against my better belief Sam had left Bella unguarded. He believed that our best chance of succeeding meant leaving her alone so that the rest of the pack could form a resistance at the frontier.

Sam's voice began to drone in my head. I had had enough of this. What were we meant to do? While we sat here Victoria and Laurent could be closing in on Bella. Not only that but we had no idea what the motives of the unknown vamp were. As far as we knew it could have been in Bella's room right now.

All of a sudden my vision became blurred. I was no longer seeing Sam and the others sitting around me, but instead everything was dark and hazy. A sharp pain shot through my arm and a feeling of nails scraped across my leg. I gasped and as my vision returned I looked beneath the table we sat around, but there was nothing there.

"Jake" asked Embry from beside me. "Are you alright mate? You look like you've seen a ghost" I shook my head slowly. This didn't make sense. Where was all this pain coming from? Due to my wolf nature even if there were something harming me, the chance of me feeling it was very slim. "I don't know" I replied slowly "There's nothing…"

I was cut off mid-sentence as a voice echoed through my head "Help me"

I would know that voice anywhere. However, it was different, drawn out as though gasping in pain.

"Bella?" I asked, looking around. I stood up quickly, knocking my chair over in the process "Bella?" I asked again. I looked around the room, expecting to find my imprint, but instead I was met with several pairs of confused eyes. Sam, Embry, Quil, Seth and Leah were all staring at me, their mouths wide open.

"She's not here, Jake" said Sam in his deep voice

"But," I said, confused "I heard her." Sam's face remained blank, his brows furrowed slightly. Then I realised "Didn't you hear her?" Sam shook his head. "Nobody here heard anything?" I asked, and the rest of the table shook their heads along with Sam.

I looked down at the table. Maybe I was going crazy. All this talk of Vampires was sending me round the twist. Yes, that must be it.

"Sit down, Jacob" said Leah softly. She took my hand and tugged until I moved back to the table. Embry righted my chair for me and I took my seat once more. Then I heard it again, stronger this time. "Help…..me" The last word was little more than a gasp as all her energy failed.

"I have to go" I said roughly, standing once more and making my way to the door.

"Jacob" Sam said gruffly "What is it?"

"Bella's in trouble" I replied over my shoulder as I ran out the door. I didn't even bother undressing. As soon as my feet found the wet ground of the outdoors I phased.

_I'm coming, Bella_

_Seeeeeeee I told you I'd see you again at the end :)_

_So how was it? Did you enjoy it? I am trying to work on my action writing since I write so much fluff. _

_Oh, and I have received around 3 reviews telling me I should write a sequel. However I know for a fact that there are many more of you who have subscribed to author/story alerts and I want to hear your view on the matter. Please review and let me know. I don't want to start being one of those annoying authors who holds their chapter's hostage but I feel like I might need to start if I'm not pulling in enough support. It helps my brain and gives you guys more 'Jacob time' :)_

_See you in 2 months,_

_Peace * holds up hand in peace gesture*,_

_lee-leerose xx_


	27. Last Night On Earth

_*Peeks out from behind bullet proof door* Anyone there? I wouldn't be surprised if you'd all abandoned me by now. I am sooooo sorry for taking such a long break. It was inexcusable...but I'm gonna try to make excuses anyway and hope that you understand :s_

_1. Africa was AMAZING! If you ever get the opportunity to go just do it because I honestly had the best time of my life._

_2. Christmas was HUGE. We had the whole of my mum's boyfriend's family at our place this year so we were bursting at the seams!_

_3. My girls camping trip was awesome fun. Good to de-stress a bit before year 12 starts._

_4. Victoria (The state, not the character, for all those who don't know their Australian geography)...Other than the massive floods going on over there it was the awesomeness. My nana is living in the town next expected to flood, but the water is moving slower now so it should be okay. It would help if everyone could just send good vibes all the way to the struggling aussies in east Australia. Thank you :)_

_Anyways, that's my little ramble. You are all probably more interested in what this chapter has in store for Jake and Bella.._

_This chapter was inspired by Last Night on Earth by Delta Goodrem._

_Enjoy,_

_lee-leerose xx _

**Chapter 28: Last Night on Earth**

**JPOV**

When I found her, she was laying in the foetal position against a tree. Dark bruises were forming all across her pale flesh, not to mention a rather nasty bump already issuing from her forehead. The overly large helmet seemed to have done nothing to save her head.

I ran to her side immediately and saw that splotches of blood ran down her exposed leg. Scratches could be seen in straight lines across her thigh, cutting through her jeans. The denim was stained with her blood, drawing streaks of dark red liquid across the blue material.

Her unconscious form lay limply on the forest floor. I couldn't stop the cry of anguish that ripped through my chest. I shouldn't have ever left her side. I should have been with her, guarding her. If I had only stopped to think for one measly second what leaving Bella alone could end in, I could have stopped this. I had promised myself that I would protect her and now I was the one who had caused her pain. So much pain and so much blood loss.

There was a sudden rustling of leaves in the bushes nearby. My head shot up to look into the surrounding trees. Beyond the bushes I could just make out a pair of wide golden brown eyes. They stared at me unblinkingly. I could feel my body begin to shake instinctively but before I could phase a voice spoke "Thank you, Jacob. Thank you". With a breath of wind Edward was gone.

I turned back to my dear Bella. What on earth had she been thinking? We had only ever ridden the bikes on one occasion that I could remember and even then it hadn't been a very successful lesson. She had crashed and hit her head back then also. At least the only blood she'd spilt today was coming from her legs.

Slipping my arms beneath her shoulders and knees, I lifted her to cradle the small figure in my arms. Beneath her jacket I could see the odd shape of her right arm. The bone was bent in a painful position. As quickly as I could, I stood and began walking quickly in the direction of Forks. I tried not to make contact with any bruises or cuts, but it was difficult, as at the same time I was trying to keep her injured arm stabilised.

Nearby lay the bike, crumpled and bent, just like Bella. I stepped over the hunk of stupid metal and continued on my way. It could rust for all I cared. Bella was the one that needed mending. I needed to get her to the hospital, and fast.

**BPOV**

Everything was black. Like charcoal had been smeared across the bright blue sky - the sky that I had only come to notice in these past few months. It was as though I were trapped in a vacuum. No sound, no sight, and no feeling.

My body seemed to be suspended, as though gravity itself had ceased to exist. I was floating in mid-air as the darkness enclosed around me. It enveloped my senses, reducing all feeling.

I was a zombie once more. Unnoticing of those things around me, kept oblivious and in the dark. If I wasn't already dead, I may as well have been.

It wasn't cold, as would have been expected in such a dark place. If it _were_ cold, I couldn't feel it. My body felt useless as I lay, floating. There was nothing to see, nothing to hear, and nothing to think. I struggled to remain 'conscious'. If that was what this was. My mind had nothing to focus on and hence drifted in and out of sleep.

I tried to wiggle my toes, but found that they wouldn't respond. It was as though they had been cemented in place. I attempted to tap my fingers but discovered that it had the same effect - Nothing moved. Even as my mind screamed at my muscles to contract, they wouldn't. They seemed to be asleep and lifeless in this floating form.

In a last attempt to break this spell I willed for my mouth to open. I wanted to talk, to hear myself cry. I wanted so badly for some normalcy, something that connected me to my living body, even if it _was_ the sound of my own voice.

I urged my muscles to awaken, to allow me this last request. I could feel the cogs turning in my brain as they worked to open my mouth. _Speak _I demanded myself _Open your mouth and scream. Let them find you. No one will know where you are if they don't hear you scream._

My head felt to be on the edge of exploding. It craved any sort of movement, any form of life. Everything was so quiet, so unmoving and unfeeling. Everything except the tears that now ran down my face.

They slipped willingly from the corners of my eyes, wetting my lashes and leading a trail of water down into my floating hair. The hairs on my face stood on end as the cold drop trickled along my skin. I could feel it bury itself into the roots of my hair, wetting it in patches.

But, wait.

I could _feel_.

If the muscles connecting to my mouth could have moved I would have been smiling. Considering the things that usually made me teary it was strange to think that crying could be a good thing, but I didn't mind. This was my first step forwards.

Slowly another sense took over. I could decipher the slightest amount of heat against my left arm. It burned away in one spot as though a single flame sat nearby. It did not give off enough heat to warm my whole body, but certainly enough to warm me up to my shoulder and down to my hand.

I could feel the warmth spread slowly, up and over my collar bone, through the veins in my neck and into my sleeping facial muscles. My lips were released of their captivated position and I felt them pull back immediately to smile slightly. _Do it now _I thought to myself _Scream..._

A shrill cry left my lips. One which I would have never thought possible. I heard the most awful high pitched scream of my own voice, yet rejoiced at the addition of yet another sense.

I wallowed in the darkness for a moment before I felt the warmth begin emanating from the same spot on my other arm, just above my elbow. It spread quickly, taking over my whole body and awakening my dormant muscles.

I was alive. _Alive_...

The darkness evaporated from my vision. Blinking furiously I managed to tear away the world before me, to find myself looking up into the worried eyes of Jacob.

...

He leant over me, his arms grasping mine on either side of my body. His muscles twitched slightly as his hands gripped my upper arms.

"Jake" I spoke in a raspy voice. My throat felt as though it were on fire. Every syllable cut against the walls causing pain to shoot down my oesophagus and into my lungs.

"Bella?" His voice seemed hesitant, almost cautious. Grey circles hung around his dark eyes. He was tired and worn out.

"Oww" I said softly, glancing down at his hands which were still clasped around my arms.

"Sorry" he said, and quickly released them from his grip. The white skin turned pink as blood flowed back to where it should be.

Jake moved his hands so that they leant on the white sheets to either side of my waist. He positioned them carefully, his eyes flicking from his hands to my face to make sure he didn't hurt me as he gingerly touched the sheets next to my aching body.

My throat was still on fire. "Water" I rasped "Please, I need water" Jake nodded and looked around wildly. He raised himself up to reach for the jug of clear liquid sitting on the bedside table. With shaking hands he poured a glass, spilling it slightly as he brought it to my lips. I took a mouthful and swallowed. The fire in my burning throat relinquished slightly.

"Thankyou" I said more clearly now. I raised the back of my hand to wipe the excess moisture from my mouth but couldn't move more than an inch above the bed. My whole arm, from my elbow to my fingertips was bound in a rock solid cast. Jake's hand shot out suddenly as I attempted to move the bandaged arm once more. He gently pushed it back down onto the mattress while his other hand grabbed the sheet and brought it to my mouth to dab at the water around my lips.

Jake sighed as he pulled back, shaking his head. "It's broken" he said softly, standing up and moving to a small straight-backed chair which was positioned so that it faced the bed on which I lay. As he sat, Jake pushed his hands through his hair in a frustrated manner. He then leant his elbows on his knees and pressed his eyes against his palms.

For the first time I noticed the streaks of water that ran down his face. His lashes were damp, sticking together in clumps. He slumped forwards and closed his eyes. His breathing was deep and purposeful as he attempted to keep his emotions buried beneath his strong facade.

I reached out to wipe away the tears from Jake's face with my good hand. He shouldn't be crying. I was unharmed -well, things were better than they could have been - and we were together. There was nothing to be sad about.

I rubbed small circles gently across Jake's temple with my thumb and for the first time I noticed that there was a needle imbedded in the pale white skin atop my hand. Clear tape held it in place while a long white tube led from the needle up to a machine situated next to my bed and into a small opaque bag.

I closed my eyes while my hand continued its pattern across Jake's cheek. My stomach was already churning at the mere thought of a needle being imbedded in my skin. I couldn't bear to think what might be running through that tube and into my vein at this very moment.

The next thing I felt were strong, warm fingers encasing mine and ceasing my movements. I reopened my eyes to find that Jake was looking at me once more. His face was damp with tears, his tanned skin blotchy in places, and his eyes bloodshot and rimmed with dark shadows.

"It's my fault" He whispered, caressing my hand before squeezing it gently, ensuring he didn't press hard enough for the needle to hurt me. "I'm sorry" He said softly, bringing my hand to his mouth and kissing it.

His lips were feather light and wet from his newly shed tears. I could see the glistening outline of his upper lip on my hand as he pulled away.

"This is not your fault" I said "I did this"

Jake began shaking his head before I had even finished.

"No," he said hoarsely, "No. I did this. I left you unguarded and alone. I should have known better. I should have been with you. I promised to keep you safe and now I'm the one causing you pain. I'm so stupid"

Jake closed his eyes again and leant forwards so that his head lay on the mattress next to my body. Our hands were still joined, laying limply in no-mans-land. I sighed and attempted to sit up. I pushed my heavy body up with my elbows and angled my knees so as to lever myself.

I pushed against the bed with my un-casted elbow and feet but just as I did a sliver of pain shot along my leg. I gasped loudly and collapsed back onto the bed. Jake's head shot up and his eyes dilated slightly as he took in the position of my body. I could almost hear his brain click as he worked out what I had been trying to do.

"No, Bella" He stood up and quickly straightened my legs and pushed my torso back down onto the soft material. "Your leg has been cut badly. It seems that all that thrashing beneath the bike caused the sharp metals to scrape against your skin. I'm so sorry. The doctors are treating it, but I can't think of anything I can do. All these wolf powers give me the ability to kill bloodsucking creatures, but if I can't even help to heal the girl I love..."

I could feel tears beginning to form in my eyes. Every part of my brain screamed at me to stop, but somehow the waterworks just wouldn't end. I wanted to raise my hands to cover my weeping eyes but they wouldn't move. After my attempt to get out of bed my muscles had been left void of energy.

I felt the mattress depress as Jake leant closer to me. Soon enough his face hovered above mine. Angst ran through his liquid brown eyes as he looked down at me with furrowed brows.

"Bells" he spoke with anguish "I'm so sorry. Please don't cry. I can't bear to see you cry. I know I deserve it for what I've done, but I don't know what to do. I feel so useless. Tell me what to do, please, just tell me what to do."

The tears ran down my face, brushing past my cheeks and lips. I wanted so much to move. I needed to get up.

"Jake, I want to sit up" I whispered "I need to stand"

"Bells, I can't" his voice broke "You're hurt badly. You need to lay down"

"But I need to hold you, Jake. I want to wrap my arms around you, but my body won't allow me" My tears strengthened as Jake's expression turned to one of surprise.

"You still want to hold me, even after what I did to you?"

"Well, as I remember it, I was the one who chose to come to La Push. You had no say in the matter. It was all my doing, so if you blame anyone it should be me." I said sharply.

"Bells..."

"No" I said in the sternest tone I could muster "No 'Bells', no 'Buts'. It's my fault. Got it?"

Jake sighed but nodded his head with a sad smile on his face.

"Good" I smiled back with as much feeling as I could. Jake's hand reached out to wipe the tears from my cold skin.

His warmth trickled through my cheeks and into my face. I could feel the blush appear under my pale features and flood into my cheeks. Then Jake pulled back the covers and I moved aside carefully so as to make room for him. He lay down next to me, his weight shifting the divot of the mattress so that I willingly rolled into his side. His warm presence was comforting.

I turned onto my side and buried my face into the crook of his neck. "Thankyou" I whispered "I'm not sure what would have happened if you hadn't found me" I stopped, suddenly curious "How _did_ you find me? You wouldn't have been able to hear me scream, even with your wolf enhanced hearing. And you had no idea that I was even coming to see you"

"I'm not really sure what it was" Jake said as his arms wrapped securely around my torso. "It was as though you were there with me. I couldn't see you, but I could hear you."

I raised an eyebrow "You heard me? Wow, I must have been screaming louder than usual"

Jake shook his head "No, it wasn't you, per se. No one else could hear you. It was just me, as though we're connected in some otherworldly way"

"Well, we are imprints" I offered, hoping this would explain Jake's odd behaviour. If not because of this, then he was probably going insane...

"That's what I thought at first, but it doesn't make any sense. I've never heard of imprints being able to communicate in this way. Sure, they can act similarly and feel as though they are connected through body and spirit, but hearing an imprintees voice when she is thousands of metres away is a new one for me"

"Don't worry your mind about it for now. We'll ask your dad when we see him next. If it has something to do with the imprinting he will definitely know about it."

Jake nodded and leant down to place a sweet kiss on my forehead "Good idea, Bells"

"Ahh" I sucked in a breath of air as he pulled away "Oww, there's a bruise there, sorry"

"Sorry Bella. I forgot for a moment there just how fragile you are."

"That's strange" I said "I don't remember hitting my head"

"What _do_ you remember?" asked Jake, sweeping a strand of hair from my cheek to tuck it behind my ear.

I thought back to how it had all begun. My mind churned as I remembered sitting a top the huge beast of a bike.

"I was driving to La Push. Everything was fine. The sun fell behind the horizon. Then..."

"What?" asked Jake cautiously.

"..I...I don't know...The next thing I remember was lying beneath the bright night sky with the bike lying across my body. The weight was too much. I tried to move, to shift the thing off me, but it only cut into my leg even more. I made to sit up but my arm hurt too much. I screamed as the stars span in circles above. There was blood running down my arms. After than I only remember the screaming. I screamed and screamed until everything went black...then I woke up here, with you" I lay limply in Jake's arms, unable to move. "And now everything is better" I said.

"Not quite everything, but I promise that soon, it will be" Jake whispered into my hair. His voice seemed far away as though he were somewhere other than here in the hospital.

I chose to ignore his response as it seemed he had not meant for me to hear that particular slip of his mind.

I closed my eyes as Jake traced idle shapes and lines across my unbandaged forearm. There was plenty of time to discuss it later, if need be. But for now I needed to rest.

**JPOV**

I spent the day at the hospital, but when night time came and the nurses told me to leave I could do nothing but follow their instructions. I ever so lightly kissed Bella's bruised lips before being ushered from the room by a grumbling old lady. As I glanced over my shoulder to say a last goodbye I caught a glimpse of a giggling Bella and felt somewhat relieved. Someone was going to pay for this, and I new exactly who it would be.

...

I phased into human form as soon as I reached the clearing and strode up the driveway. From this close proximity you could truly appreciate the enormity of the thing.

The Cullen house was just as I remembered it. Tall and standoutish in the forest. However, instead of being able to see straight inside its huge glassy windows, they were glossed over with winter dew making them seem opaque in the dim light.

The house was timeless. Its elegance and sophistication could last years. No doubt that this had been its purpose, to stay modern throughout its lifetime, no matter which century it was.

I thought back to the last time I had stood on this ground. It had been just after the Cullen's had left. I had come here to check that the rumours were true. That they really had left for good. I hadn't believed that they would just pick up and leave like they did. But to my astonishment I had found the house empty. All the furniture remained, untouched as though no one had lived there in the first place. Though, I would argue that the Cullen's had never 'lived' at all.

Their lives had been spent in solace for many years. The teenagers were only ever seen at school, and other than that they kept their social lives to a minimum. The mother would be seen once a week buying food from the local supermarket. Of course, this was all just for show. They never ate any of the food they bought. Instead, the mother would often drop the useless items in some back alley for the homeless to make use of.

In my opinion, the only Cullen whom had truly lived was the father. Dr. Carlisle Cullen was his name. He was well known around the town as the best doctor Forks had ever had, and for this I was grateful. Dr. Cullen helped to save peoples lives every day. He earned an honest living, worked his shifts, gained a good reputation around town and truly loved his misfit family.

If it hadn't been for his bloodsucking tendencies I might have labelled Carlisle as a friend. But, no, the Cullen clan could never be our 'friends'. No werewolf and vampire could coexist...ever. Doing so would break the unwritten code that had been passed down over generations. It was simple, and yet I had broken it.

Yes, I, Jacob Black, protector of these lands had broken our most trusted law. I was working alongside Edward Cullen who was, of course, an immortal enemy of our kind. However, I did not see this as a breach of the rules, but instead as an extension of my rights. It was all in the name of keeping Bella - my imprint, my one true love - safe, and was therefore within the boundaries laid down for our kind. As wolves, we were expected to look after our imprints and if that meant that I had to get along with our enemies then so be it.

However, with recent events my stance had wavered. Bella's 'accident' had caused me to loose faith in Edward's ability to help. His presence alone brought her pain. He had medalled in her life for the last time. He had promised to stay away from her, and now here he was causing her to crash. I wasn't sure that it was him but what else could it be? He had been at the scene of the crime after all. No doubt it was all his doing. The bloodsucker was going down.

I walked determidly towards the front door and turned the knob furiously. It was locked. "Open up, Cullen" I said "You have some explaining to do".

Silence.

I jostled the doorknob roughly and turned to shove my arm against the door. "I know you're there, Cullen" I nearly yelled, knowing perfectly well that his extrasensory hearing would pick up my racket from over a mile away.

I shoved hard against the door repeatedly, but not hard enough to break through the wood. I didn't want a mess, only an explanation. "Edward, we need to talk". As I pulled away from the rumbling wood I saw the doorknob turn slightly. I stepped back immediately and met the face of my greeter.

Edward was back to his former 'glory'. He was well-dressed, clean and had obviously been keeping his hunger under control. I stepped towards the vampire and he followed my lead, stepping back to allow me in. Once we were inside the door swung shut behind him.

The house was clean. Not tidy, but obsessively clean. Every nook was clear of dust and clutter. The furniture was bare. Nothing held any emotional value. This was not a home, but a house. This realisation only made the idea of the Cullen's having 'lived' even more unlikely.

"What is it, Jacob?" Edward asked coolly, standing in the doorway.

"You said you'd stay away from her" I nearly growled

Edwards head dropped slightly "I know. He rubbed his temple with his fingers and walked around me into the living room

"So, why didn't you?" I asked forcefully "Now she's lying in hospital, hurt and alone, all because of you" I followed Edward into the lounge and watched furiously.

"I had to see her, Jacob" Edward spoke quietly "You have to understand how difficult it is to be in such close proximity. Her blood calls to me. I imagine it barely compares to a humans need for water, or perhaps even the opposite sex"

_Her blood calls to him?_ What a ridiculous excuse "That doesn't give you reason to make your presence known. You of all people should know what happens when you appear in her life. Think back. Remember what you did to her that first night when she was lost. She couldn't stand your presence and she didn't even see your face. What gives you the right to show your face now?" I was fuming so much that steam should have been shooting from my ears.

"You're taking this the wrong way, Jake." Said Edward, his face contorted in the shadow of the lounge room.

"How else should I be taking this, Cullen? You hurt her, again. Even after you promised to stay away"

"I know, but I was trying to help"

"Oh, really?" I asked dubiously "How so?"

"I knew you were at your meeting, so I was watching her house for you. When she took off on the bike I had a choice; either to stay where I was and risk her being caught by Victoria, or to follow her and risk her seeing me. I decided on the latter. I weighed up the situation carefully. Victoria would never hold back. She would kill Bella at the first chance she got. But I would never do such a thing. If my urges suddenly overcame my sense of reason I would flee from the place. I would never hurt her..."

"Go on" I growled

"I remained in the shadows the whole way. I had to ensure that she got to your place in one piece. But then she saw me. I must have become entranced with her and run too close to the road because she looked into the bushes, straight at me. I couldn't believe what happened next. Even in vampire speed it happened very quickly."

"Explain"

"She lost control" Edwards voice seemed surprisingly uncontrolled. It wavered slightly as he pulled back those memories "The motorcycle ran off the road and straight into the forest. Forest ground isn't the smoothest ride. She was bucked off, into a tree. The bike landed on top of her. I was frozen with indecision. I stood in the shadows surrounding her, unable to move. I couldn't let her see me. It would destroy her, but at the same time she was in grave danger. She struggled as she attempted to lift the hunk of mental off of her, but it was futile. If I had a heart it would have broken at the sight of those precious tears running down her gorgeous face. Eventually she passed out from exhaustion. I sprinted into the clearing to lift the bike off her but as soon as it was removed the most wonderful scent filled the air...her blood"

Edward was immobile. His eyes had turned dark.

"I didn't know how long I would last" He whispered "After spending so much time away from her I feared that my senses would betray me. So, I hid in the shadows in case she awoke and kept a lookout until you arrived. Then I ran. I had to get her scent out of my head."

Edward took an unneeded breath.

"Thankyou, Jacob" He spoke, looking straight at me with unguarded eyes. He was in pain "You have shown your love for her. I know now that I can trust you with her life"

"As I can trust you also. I thank you for what you did."

There was a short pause while Edward smiled and bent his head to the floor. "I would do anything for her," he whispered "anything. Including fighting a newborn"

"A what?" I asked, fairly sure that I knew what Edward was referring to.

"Newborn" he clarified "It is the term our kind uses to describe the first two years of this life. It is within this time that we act, not with our minds, but with our thirst. It drives us and makes us stronger...I am only telling you this because...well, the scent I picked up in Bella's room the other night was not Victoria. It wasn't anyone I know, but a newborn who I have never met."

"What do you suggest we do?" I asked, completely baffled at the idea of yet another vampire causing us grief.

"I'm calling for the others to return to forks." Edward replied

"The other Cullens?" I was dumbstruck. One Cullen was enough trouble for me.

"Yes" answered Edward as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"No" I contradicted "It's hard enough keeping you under wraps. If Bella discovered that any of you had returned she would go insane. Her breakdowns would only get worse"

"But what about Victoria?" He asked "The pack can't guard Forks, Bella AND Charlie, while also looking for a rogue newborn. It's just not possible"

"We're doing fine keeping an eye out for the bloodsucking redhead. Meanwhile you could look out for the newborn"

"Although I may know little on the subject of Newborns, I do know that when one is created, generally it's not a mistake. Usually our kind feeds until death. It is one of the hardest things to do, not to keep going. So when one is created there is purpose behind it."

"Why would this one be created?"

"I don't know. Without being sure of who is the creator I cannot know its purpose"

"Then we all contribute to the finding and killing of Victoria and the newborn. Easily solved."

"My talents only go so far when it comes to newborns" Edward said "My brother, Jasper, he is an expert on the matter. If we are going to be defeating any newborns we will need his experience and knowledge."

"So, just call _him _and the others won't need to come"

"Do I need to remind you that Bella's safety is in question? Alice can see the future, Carlisle is a trained doctor, Emmett is an excellent fighter, as are Rosalie and Esme. If we are going to stop these vampires you need all of us" Countered Edward "Therefore you need the rest of my family to keep Bella safe"

I shut my eyes tightly. For a moment I thought about the idea. Vampires in Forks was not on top of my list, but saving Bella's life was. "Fine, Cullen. Just keep her safe"

_Oh crap_ I thought

What was I getting myself into?

_So, there we are. I hope you enjoyed it . In the next chapter Jake has to talk to the elders about the Cullens returning and ask about his and __Bella's 'connection'. I'll have it up soon :)_

_Please review,_

_Vegemite and cheese,_

_lee-leerose xx_


	28. Believe Again

_Helllllooooo, are you ready to gooooo? We're gonna lose controooolll, so let's go!_

_Haha, sorry. That song's been stuck in my head since it became the new theme song for the TV channel, GO. Love the Potbellies :)_

_Anywho. Here's the next chappy. Enjoy, my little jake-aholics ;)_

_lee-leerose xx_

_p.s. This one is to the tune of Believe Again by Delta Goodrem. One of her more recent songs._

**Chapter 29: Believe Again**

**JPOV**

_C'mon, breathe_ I told myself _It won't be that bad. They'll understand._

I shook my head, attempting to rid my mind of its worries.

Everything seemed to be pressing down on my shoulders. Responsibilities shot at me from every direction. Victoria, Laurent, the newborn, Bella's life, Charlie's safety, the packs decision, Edward _and_ the return of the Cullen clan. It was all far too much for one man to burden, but it was also my duty to do so.

Today was the day I was meeting with Sam and my dad to discuss the current events. It was within these few short hours of daylight that I would finally divulge the secret of Edward's return and his plan to invite the other Cullens to join him.

I was apprehensive. What if Sam disagreed with the decision I'd made to allow the Cullen clan to return? What would my father have to say on the matter? Surely, as a second father to Bella, he would want what's best for her. Shouldn't that mean that he would support my choice in allowing Edward to call them back?

I was also interested in what my father would have to say on the subject of the 'connection' Bella and I shared. It was the strangest sensation, to hear someone from miles away and feel their pain as your own. Yet I had never heard of a wolf sharing this strange ability with anyone, not even an imprint.

It was all very weird and confusing. I could only hope that once everything was set on the table it would become clearer and that Sam, dad and I could all come to an agreement.

Right now though I wanted nothing more than to focus on the precious time I had alone with Bella. Since she had been discharged from the hospital her father had been overly protective of her. He couldn't believe that I would let his baby girl near an object as dangerous as a motorcycle. However, all the evidence said otherwise and as a cop, evidence was everything to Charlie.

Bella had tried to make him see the light but it seemed that the sight of his daughter lying with a broken arm, head injuries and cuts to the legs had prevented him from forgiving me.

I could see his point. I blamed myself as much as he did, if not more. I was the one who had been kept so busy with 'wolf business' that it forced Bella into the situation. I had also been the one to provide her with the motorcycle; something that I doubted Charlie would ever forgive me for. Lastly, but not leastly, it had been _Edward_ who had caused her 'accident'. If I had just manned up and told her _he_ was back maybe this would never have happened and Bella would be in perfect health.

In order to see Bella these days I had to hope that Charlie would be called into the station for an emergency. Against his better judgement he would call me and ask if I could pick her up - not wanting her to take things into her own hands considering how it had panned out the last time- before he would drive off with a hint of a threat in his departing glare. This morning I had received such a call and within minutes I had Bella in my arms, leading her to my car.

Although she had been cleared by the nurses Bella's arm was still set in a cast. It was held to her chest in a sling of material while similar white bandages ran up her thin legs to cover the wounds that traced across her pale skin. Being the defiant woman she was, Bella had refused to take the single crutch the nurse had offered her, and although Charlie had brought it home for her to use I arrived at the Swan residence to see Bella hobble out of Charlie's arms and straight into mine, which were outstretched and waiting. After setting Bella down carefully in the passenger side of the car Charlie handed me the crutch, in hope that I might be able to talk her into using it.

_It was a sort of trade off _I thought as I lay the length of wood down on the backseat of the car. It was almost as if Charlie was daring me to talk her into using it. If I could do that then maybe some form of forgiveness could be achieved.

I thought hard about this as I drove to La Push. Bella didn't speak the whole way. When we hit straight road she wound her window down with her good arm and leant to the side to look out into the passing forest.

I knew what she was thinking about. It had to be_ him_. It was_ always him_. Why couldn't_ he_ just leave her alone? Leave us alone? I watched as Bella's chocolate brown hair whipped in the air. The way it curled in invisible currents was mesmerising.

Without thinking I reached out a hand to touch the silky strands and was rewarded with Bella turning her curious eyes on me. They were dark and wide. She was still as innocent as ever, my fragile little flower. For a moment all I could look at was her, and those stunning eyes.

I was broken from my reverie by Bella, who cleared her throat and pointed a slim finger at the road. "Uh, Jake..."

"Hmmmm?" I replied, refusing to look away from the sight of her.

"You probably should keep your eyes on the road. Being in a car crash is not on my list of things to do and I'm not sure Charlie would forgive you if I returned home with more broken bones than already accounted for."

"Right..." I said slowly before pulling myself back together and facing the road.

I heard Bella giggle lightly beside me. The seat squeaked as she leant closer and finally her soft lips planted a small kiss on my cheek "And anyway," she said "Who would carry me around if you were hurt as well?"

"Actually I was hoping to talk to you about that" I said as we pulled up to my house.

I chanced a look at Bella and saw her eyes were confused and eyebrows furrowed. I put off talking until I was parked outside the garage. After pulling on the handbrake I swiftly opened my door and got out. Bella sat in the passenger seat, still looking like an angel who'd just woken up after falling from heaven.

I walked around to her side of the car and opened the door before offering my hand to help her out. She took it with her good hand and slipped out of the seat, wincing slightly as she landed on her bandaged legs. Without waiting a moment I pulled her swiftly to the side and shut the car door with my free hand. I had her pressed up against the backdoor of the Rabbit, her plastered arm keeping unwanted distance between us.

I could feel every breath as she struggled to draw air into her lungs. Her chest rose and fell against mine causing a fire to ignite in my stomach.

"J-Jake" she stuttered "What...?"

I silenced her, sealing her mouth with mine. She didn't resist, but instead pressed closer to me, clawing at my neck with her free hand. I pressed back, allowing myself to feel her whole length held between my body and the car.

Sooner than I had planned, her knees gave way. Her legs collapsed beneath her as she slipped down the side of the car. I reached out to grasp at her waist and hold her limp form upright.

"Jake" she breathed "I _can't_ stand as it is. How am I meant to hold myself up when you turn my aching legs into _jelly_?"

"Hmmmm" I hummed close to her ear "Maybe you should use something else as a support..."

Bella pulled back slightly, her dazed eyes narrowing "Did Charlie put you up to this? Gah, I knew he was out to get me using that damn crutch"

"How dare you suggest such a thing" I joked before pulling her close to whisper "But it could make him forgive me sooner. Then I could see you more often. You have no idea how much it's pained me, not being able to see you unless Charlie has to go to work for an emergency call. Not to mention that it would be doing _you_ some good too. Your leg is bound to get better quicker if you're not standing on it all the time"

Bella smiled "On one condition"

"What's that?"

Bella's mouth curved into a small smirk. If I had to use one word to describe it, I would have called it evil. "That these make-out sessions we're having become a regular thing from now on"

"Oh, you're a tough bargainer, you are"

She guided my face down to hers with her good hand and kissed me in a way that could only be described as seductive "I'm like my dad in that way. Stubborn" I could feel her smile against my lips before taking them once again with hers.

"Deal" I groaned, pressing her back against the Rabbit which rocked slightly in answer to the force.

...

**BPOV**

Change is often seen as a bad thing. It can throw your daily routine out of whack. Your whole idea of what it means to be you is dismantled, pulled apart into tiny pieces of a jigsaw that don't quite fit together.

I knew this change very well. When _he_ left everything went haywire. My life became something so gruesomely disfigured that it was barely recognisable.

Rarely had I felt a change as strong as the one occurring now. It could only just compare to that of over a year ago, and even then that was only in intensity.

The change I experienced while kissing Jake was so powerful I could have sworn an electric volt had just zapped through my chest. I felt a longing to be closer to him. Pure need coursed through me as I made a decision I had never imagined possible.

He was my earth, my sun, my air, my moon, my gravity. Everything I felt and did circled around him. But for how much longer?

I felt myself crack as I opened up to him, letting him push the boundaries. But when he pulled away I only felt the longing intensify. I whimpered and he raised a hand to caress my cheek before giving my lips a quick peck and slipping a single crutch into my hand "_Your_ dad will be calling _my_ dad in due time to make sure that we haven't eloped" Jake watched me as I grudgingly placed the crutch under my arm and began to hobble slowly towards the house.

I gave him a longing look "Maybe we should"

"Oh no missy" he said "No eloping until you're all better"

I grumbled, but Jake just laughed as he opened the door for me so that I could enter the main house.

"Bella!" exclaimed Billy loudly "I had been wondering when I would see you again"

"Hey Billy" I answered cordially "Long time no see"

After an odd hug which included much bending on my part and help from Jake so that I could reach the wheelchair without falling over, Billy and I began to chat away like old friend. He seemed very interested in how my injuries were coming along. His attention was startling and I felt over loved, if such a thing were possible, for the first time in my life.

When we managed to break away from the conversation Jake lead me to his room. I hopped in on my crutch, taking care not to hit the walls and door.

I felt at home here. Everything was where it should have been. No stranger had waltzed through his room; no nasty vampire was plotting revenge, and no ex-boyfriend kept popping up in my memories. Everything was perfect.

"So," started Jake "What do you want to do? We have an hour in which we can do anything you want. Play a board game, read a book, bake a cake..."

I laughed "I thought you had a meeting today"

"Yea, but not until I've had my Bella time" He grinned at me and I hobbled over to where he stood in the centre of the room

"Seriously...bake a cake?"

Jake cocked his head to the side and jutted out his lower lip "No cake?"

I shook my head, smiling at his immaturity "Okay, okay. We can bake a cake. But I'm just watching. I don't need anymore accidents."

Jake made a sour face but took my crutch away and came back to lift me bridle style before carrying me into the kitchen.

...

An hour later I had cake batter splattered from head to foot. I had never noticed how messy baking could be. But then again I had never baked with Jake, who seemed to very much enjoy making me giggle every time he 'accidentally' smudged some chocolate on my lips and had to kiss it off. I retaliated by flicking batter across his face...and so the war began.

By the time Billy came in to tell Jake it was time for them to leave Jake had me sitting on the bench, his body wedged between my legs and the surrounding kitchen was covered in raw cake batter. Jake spoke in a low voice, explaining something about how the baking powder helped the cake to rise, but I wasn't listening. I was souly focussed on that small drop of chocolate a mere centimetre above his upper lip. It glistened in the light and asked for my full attention, so you can imagine how confused I was when Jake turned away to look at his dad.

In my stupor I could only see the distinct nod of Jake's head as he listened to whatever Billy was saying. He picked up the cake pan full of chocolaty goodness and placed it in the oven.

"Bells" he spoke softly, walking back towards me and placing his hands on either side of my face.

"Mmmhmmm?" I responded dreamily.

"I have to go to the meeting now, but I'll be back in about an hour. Do you think you'll be okay here by yourself?"

"Sure" I said, still not entirely sure about what was going on.

"Okay" Jake said, giving me a quick kiss on the cheek before starting to pull away "I'll see you soon"

"No," I said loudly "Wait!" I reached up with my un-casted hand and pulled him down rashly. Our lips missed at first and it took a moment to find where they belonged. But once they met it felt like magic. My heart thumped loudly, screaming at me to make this count; to express everything in this short amount of time.

Before too long I was broken from my thoughts by a distinct chuckle coming from the doorway. Jake smiled as he pulled away and glanced over his shoulder.

"I said PG, Jake" Billy teased, spinning his chair around "I'll meet you outside, but be quick. We old folks aren't used to waiting around" and with that he rolled off down the hall.

"Whoops" I whispered as Jake turned back to me "Sorry, I guess I lost my grip on reality"

"You got that right. But I wouldn't be sorry for it" he said playfully, pecking my lips one last time. "I need to grab something, stay here for a moment"

"Okay" I said as I watched him disappear.

Soon enough he was back with a single stick of wood under his arm...my crutch. I groaned in defeat. "Do I have to?"

"Yes" He said sternly "Otherwise Charlie will never let me see you again"

"Fine" I sighed "As long as our deal still stands" I said, a hint of mischief in my voice.

"Oh, you bet it does" Jake said "Stay safe"

"Always do" I said innocently, widening my eyes for impact.

Jake chuckled as he pulled away and walked out the kitchen door. "Love you" he yelled back at me.

"Love you more"

"Love you most" and with that he was gone.

**JPOV**

So, there I was, driving me and my father to Sam's house, when a wave of guilt shot through me. Bella was by herself! Hopefully our meeting would prove to be worthwhile and I wouldn't feel so bad about leaving Bella by herself in my house.

She had spent most of her childhood at my place, playing in my room or running around outside so it wasn't as though my house was foreign to her, but considering the situation I realised that she might have felt safer at her own place.

We reached Sam's house and before I had even set up my father's wheelchair a small dark haired woman came skipping out of the house. "Jacob!" she sang as she pulled me into the tight hug "It's been too long. How are you?"

"I'm well, thanks Emily" I replied, grinning at her reaction.

"That's good. Well, we'd better get you two inside. The others are already seated and waiting so if you want any muffins you're going to have to be quick"

"Thanks, Em"

"What took you so long anyway?" she asked as she helped my dad out of the car and into his wheelchair.

"It seems Jake's taken a strong liking to cooking these days" dad hinted, his mouth pulling up into a cheeky grin.

"Oh, well that's fantastic. Good for you, Jake" said an excited Emily, not picking up on my ulterior motive for baking.

I rolled my dad around to the back door and through to the kitchen. Sitting around the dining table was the whole pack. Embry, Quil and Leah chatted lazily about something while Seth was immersed in a conversation with Sam. As soon as we entered everyone turned in their seats and calls of "Hey" or "Hiya".

"Dude" mumbled Quil through a mouthful of chocolate muffin "where were you?"

"Bella came over…" I started, but the others just groaned

"Jake!" piped in Embry "Man, you're so whipped"

_Why, yes. Yes I was._

The meeting started off rather slowly. Sam explained that I had some important issues that needed discussing before passing the reigns over to me.

"Okay" I started "There is something that I probably should have told you all a while back, but unfortunately I didn't know how to deal with it at the time."

Everyone staring back at me. Emily's eyes were curious, watching me intently from beside Sam.

"It's difficult to explain. So forgive me if I've stepped out of line for not telling you earlier, but I thought it was necessary to keep this information private unless it became imperative that I share it will you all. However, due to recent events it has become evident that it is essential for you all to know…"

"Go on" spoke Leah "Just spit it out"

I sighed and spoke the words I knew would cause uproar "Edward's back"

Within seconds the shouting had begun.

"What! That leech can't be back!"

"He left Forks for good, didn't he?

"Stupid bloodsucker doesn't know what's coming for him"

"Oh gosh, this is bad, so very, very bad"

"I'll rip the head off the little pest"

"QUIET!" came Sam's voice of authority. The room hushed automatically. It seemed that his place as Alpha could come in handy during situations such as this. "Let Jake speak." He said, lowering his voice to a conversational level "I'm sure he has a perfectly good reason for keeping this information from us"

Sam looked to me and I cleared my throat before addressing the pack once more. They were all staring at me with wide, angry eyes.

"Edward was hanging around for a few weeks, simply trying to catch a glimpse of Bella"

"And why should he?" asked Embry.

"Yea" shouted Quil from across the table "What right does he have coming back here? He was the one who left her. Bella was as good as dead when he said he didn't love her; the state she was in was downright scary"

"I know it looks bad" I said calmly "But Edward explained to me why he left, and he truly does love Bella"

"Pfft, he's not very good at showing it" shot Leah, glowering at me.

"He didn't want to hurt her. Bella wanted to become like him, but he resisted and decided the best life for her was one where he didn't exist"

"Here, here" piped in Seth, who was obviously feeling left out of the conversation.

Everybody looked around to glance pitifully at the youngest member of the pack, Leah giving him a disapproving look before turning back to me.

"But why would he want to stay, Jake. I'm guessing that he's seen her now. Why wouldn't he just let her be?"

I gulped. This was the bit I was afraid of telling them "A few weeks ago, while Bella was studying for exams, I detected a strangers scent in her bedroom."

"Was it human?" asked Sam, seriously.

I shook my head.

"Do you know who it was?"

I shook my head again. "That day I met Edward in the forest next to Bella's house. He explained the situation and that he had been tracing Victoria. He wanted to help. He mentioned something about the short female Cullen being able to see the future and that she hadn't seen any of Victoria's plans. Nearing graduation I met him again, this time I asked him for his help with the unknown scent. He agreed to my condition of keeping away from her" my voice dropped to a near growl and the whole pack tensed, feeling my anger.

"I'm guessing he didn't give her enough space?" asked Emily innocently

I shook my head, again "Bella broke her arm because of _him_"

A few muffled growls and pronounced gasps reverberated around the table.

"_He_ was the one who caused her to crash the bike?" asked Quil, shocked.

"Yes" I growled.

"What did you do about it?" asked Embry

"I confronted him, didn't I? I went straight to that damn flash house of theirs and confronted him about what he did to her. He denied meaning her any harm. He said that since I was here in meetings about Victoria he didn't want to risk her being caught by the redhead, the male or our unknown leech. So, he followed her, but unfortunately she caught a glimpse of his face and lost her concentration."

"Oh my God" breathed Leah "Poor Bella" This was strange, as I had never heard Leah speak nicely of anyone before, but I disregarded the comment and continued.

"That's not all. He discovered that it was a newborn in her room during exams"

Confused faces surrounded me, none more so than Seth. "What's a newborn?" he asked.

"It's a vampire, fresh from being turned"

The packs eyes darkened at once, a feeling of hatred coursing through our wolfish instincts.

"We'll take it down together" spoke Sam, his Alpha authority seeping through.

"We can't" I said simply.

"What?" he asked, turning to me in a huff "Are your defying my orders?"

"No," I said "Whatever you say goes. I'm just pointing out that it will be impossible"

"Explain"

"We can't keep a lookout for Victoria and Laurent as well as the newborn at the same time as keeping Bella safe. Chances are that we'll stuff up somewhere along the line and one of us will get hurt. We need Edward's help"

"Did the bloodsucker tell you this?" asked Sam, sceptically

"Yes"

"So, how do you know he's not just looking out for himself? What if this is a friend of his?"

I thought hard about my answer to this "I trust him" I said simply "As crazy as it sounds I think Edward really wants what is best for Bella, even if that includes helping a bunch of wolves."

Sam bit his lip as he thought "What does Edward's help include?"

"He offered for the other Cullen's to return to Forks"

Again, there was uproar. Shouts filled the air as the pack protested.

Sam didn't say a word, but instead lifted his hand to lessen the noise.

"I'm afraid that if Jake is right, and we cannot compete with this many vampires we may indeed need to enlist the help of the Cullen's"

Nobody spoke. Only small grumbles of discontent could be heard around the table, mainly from Leah.

_Now there's only one thing to discuss_ I thought _Whether or not I'm insane_

_Well, that finished a bit earlier than I had pre-empted but hopefully you enjoyed it none-the-less. We have our Ball this weekend so I'm trying to get all my homework done as well as organise my social life. Unfortunately this meant a shorter chapter, but at least I got it up _

_Also, sorry to those people who have been requesting that I review their stories. I am so sorry, but I really do have a lot on my plate at the moment. Just please give me a little more time and I should get around to it soon. Again, I am really sorry for the delay :s_

_So, seriously guys, there's only 10 chapters left! OMG! How exciting right?_

_We are getting to the good stuff now so just hang with me. The next chapter is sure to be a real showstopper. Something I bet none of you will see coming. But, just to make this interesting, I would love to hear your ideas. What shocking thing could happen to really stir things up? Come on; let me into those pretty little heads of yours. I wanna know what you think :)_

_Happy plotting,_

_Boomboxes with surround sound,_

_lee-leerose xx_

_P.S I think I fixed the problem with the crutches. Thankyou to everyone who helped. Now I can get on to writing the exciting stuff __ xx_


	29. Brave Face

_**Hiya,**_

_**So, it's been a while. Obviously I am really bad at keeping to a schedule. I'll try to work on that but I can't promise anything**_

_**The amount of reviews I have received recently has been amazing. Not only that, but I have also received so many notifications from people who have added this to their Story/Author alerts and favourites lists. You guys are so freaking awesome. I can't thank you enough!**_

_**NB: this chapter contains some close to M material in the way of 'Jacob time'. You have been warned. It is my first time trying to write in this way, but I thought the characters needed it. Please tell me if it's any good. Thanks **___

_**See you at the end of this chappy **___

_**Lee-leerose xx**_

_**P.s Again, Delta Goodrem. This is my fave by her XD**_

**Chapter 30: Brave Face**

**JPOV**

(Continued from last chapter)…

It took me a long time to explain the different ways in which the Cullen's could help us. Like how Edward could read minds, the short haired girl could see the future, Carlisle was a great doctor, the blond haired girl, dark haired boy and Carlisle's wife were all excellent fighters, while the blond haired boy not only knew a lot about how to fight vampires and newborns, but he could also control the emotions of those around him.

This was by far one of the most difficult discussions we'd had as a pack. Usually our meetings consisted of Sam simply giving us orders about our roles if some form of danger should ever evolve. However, in this case the danger was already present. It loomed in the near future, threatening our lives and the lives of those we loved.

Things were becoming heated. Leah stood; half crouched over the table, her pearly white teeth snarling in my direction. Seth stared at his older sister, a look of complete and utter awe etched across his face. Embry sat in his seat with his arms outstretched, his hands forming tight fists on the table while his nails dug into the hard wood. Even Emily, who was by far the most logical person present, seemed to be on the edge of breaking. In a single moment Quil slammed his fists down on the table with enough force for a thin crack to yield down the centre of the dark wood. The sound of splintering furniture seemed to pull the group from its fury and everyone pulled back slightly as though cautious about how much their wolf-like temperaments could go until they snapped.

After everyone had quietened down somewhat Seth's voice peeped up from the dying tumult. He was smaller in size than the rest of the pack, having only recently gone through the change. But even so, the near violent shaking of his tiny could be seen clearly. "I believe it is in our best interests" came his breaking teenage voice "to call the Cullen's back to help".

Everyone's mouths opened in unison, as though to argue this point, but Seth only pulled back his shoulders so his chest expanded and increased his height measurably. "I'm not going to let you all bicker like five year olds. I only want what's best for this pack and my family. If anything were to happen to mum, or any of you I don't know what I would do with myself. I'm not sure about any of you, but I don't think I could live with myself if one stupid decision meant that I lost those people I love the most. It's _our_ future. It's in _our_ hands, and I'm not about to stand by and watch _you_ all throw it away just because_ their_ meant to be our 'mortal enemies'. Sure, they may be vampires, and we may hate them. But if working side-by-side with the embodiment of Satan himself means a better life for everyone involved then I'm all for it. Who's with me?"

Shocked silence filled the room. This boy, not much into his teen years had just stood up to his whole pack of much older and more experienced wolves. But this wasn't the only shocking fact. No, the thing that was the most confusing was that he was _right_, and there was nothing that anyone in this room could say otherwise.

This was why we had been passed down the gene of our ancestors. This was why we patrolled the forests at night and learnt to fight our enemies. It was to save those we loved; the innocent and the unknowing.

With Seth's help we decided that calling the Cullens back to help, although not the most dignified or agreeable thing we'd ever done, was the best move to make in terms of safety. With them by our side we could tackle any vampire that came our way with the knowledge that everyone would be as safe a possible.

Without much more to say everyone took a muffin and began to eat. Different individuals of the pack seemed to be taking their frustrations about the situation out in different ways. Quil and Embry scoffed down their portions as if the world were ending. Leah made noises of discontent as she mumbled between each bite of the crumbling cake. Meanwhile Emily barely even touched her portion, choosing instead to pull tiny pinches from the patty pan and nibble on them slowly.

Once everyone had eaten their fill Sam spoke "Now that we have that sorted, I do believe you had something else to discuss with us, Jacob"

I swallowed hard before starting, my throat automatically stuck as I thought of revealing what had happened that day. Would they think me crazy? I would either sound like a very special mental case, or an insane teenager. Neither sounded very appealing, but I needed to get some answers for why this had happened to me in the first case. If it was a slip of my sanity perhaps I should be in a hospital….

"Well" I started nervously, rubbing my hands together as I spoke "You were all present the night Bella had the motorbike 'accident'?"

Everyone around me nodded in unison. I took a deep breath to calm my nerves and started again "So, you probably noticed how bizarre I was acting at the time"

Another round of nodding followed this point. Quil and Embry nodded their heads with huge movements and widened their eyes to emphasise their agreeing with my statement.

"Dude, you were acting as if you were completely smashed" pointed out Embry

"Yea, I agree" said Quil "You seemed pretty out of it"

"What happened, Jacob?" asked Emily, her sweet voice cutting through the male testosterone which so often overpowered our meetings. She was obviously more concerned for my sanity than any of the guys.

"What Quil said is partially true" I said. "I was pretty 'out of it'; only it wasn't because I was 'smashed'. There were things happening to me that only I could feel…"

"Uhhh, Jake?" Quil cut in, "Usually would say that it's only natural to have these feelings, but I'm not sure that your body should be reacting that way around a group of hot wolf brothers" Quil laughed and nudged Embry in the ribs, causing his 'other half' to chuckle loudly.

"Yea, mate. This conversation is becoming a little awkward. Perhaps you should console Google about these feelings before 'coming out' to us" piped up Embry through spurts of uncontrollable laughter.

I sighed and rolled my eyes "Real mature, guys"

"Well, we could only go off what you told us" teased Quil, leaning back in his chair luxuriously so that he was balanced on just two legs with his hands poised behind his head.

"Shut up' Instructed Leah, kicking the leg of Quil's chair.

Quil slipped and fell back with a loud cry. "Jesus, Leah! What the hell?" He flailed around on the floor while Leah turned back to the group and spoke with even more severity than usual. "Jacob's trying to tell us something important and some people are being complete asses. Would you all mind paying him a little _respect_?" She spat the last word at Embry who had sunk down into his chair considerably since Leah had started speaking.

As hard as I tried I couldn't wipe away the smirk which appeared on my face. I turned away from the group in an attempt to compose myself and not let Leah see that her actions had caused my laughing also. I could hear a small amount of scuffling behind me as Quil righted himself in his chair. He grumbled something about how he had only been mucking around which received another snarl from Leah's direction. When I had managed to form a clear expression I turned back to the pack.

Now it was time to be serious.

"I could feel what Bella felt that night"

Everyone's expressions changed as they remained seated in front of me.

Staring.

Questioning.

Confused.

Finally Leah broke the silence. "What do you mean you could _feel_ what Bella felt?"

"When she ran off the road and flew through the air, I could feel the blood pumping through my veins. When she hit the tree, my whole arm felt as if it were shattered. My lungs were being squeezed of air as if it were _me_ who had the motorbike pinning them down. I could hear her screaming. It sounded as though she were in the room with us. I freaked out. I didn't know how or why this was happening but I needed to get to Bella. That's why I left in the way I did."

"But that's impossible, Jacob' spoke Emily quietly "There's no way you could have felt the things she did"

"What do you think, Billy?" Asked Sam.

The whole table turned to my father who sat quietly outside the group. His eyes were narrowed and his eyebrows furrowed.

He cleared his throat before speaking "I believe it is possible. Few of our ancestor's stories tell us of the imprinting process and fewer still tell us of this occurrence. I can only remember one tale in which such an incident passed.

"Kihala was a protector of these lands many years ago. His story tells us of how he came to imprint upon Chia, whom he had known since birth. One day Chia was deep within the forest, collecting berries for the tribe when suddenly a great bear came out of the trees. Only days before the tribe had been attacked by this bear's mother and he had come to avenge her. Chia was hurt badly by the bear. She was beaten and cut as he dragged her over the forest floor, back to his den. Kihala had been hunting at the time and at the moment of hearing her scream fill his mind and her pain spread through his body he ran to find her.

"When one wolf can feel that of his imprint, it is very deep magic indeed. The bond they share is stronger than most. They are intertwined by so much more than just love. They trust one another with the deepest amount of reliance. They are inseparable. So much so that if anything should happen to one, the other would also feel their pain and suffer their emotions. Kihala explains to us that his imprint survived that day, only because of their connection. If he had not run to her side, Chia would have passed."

Everyone gaped at my father. "Why haven't you told us this before?" I asked, dumbstruck. If I had known that imprinting was the cause I might not have believed myself to be insane.

"We passed it off as simple fiction. We believed for a long time that imprinting was a thing of the past, and until we started experiencing it for ourselves" He sent a side-long glance at Sam and Emily before looking back at me "we had no reason to share those particular tales. This is another of those things. Until now we have not had reason to share Kihala's tale with you."

Leah was the next to speak "So, what does this mean, now that Jacob and Bella can feel each other's pain? Will it affect them in any way?"

"We have no way of knowing how this might affect Jake and Bella" my dad sighed "We can only wait and hope that it doesn't hurt them"

My dad looked up at me, his dark eyes shimmering. He seemed worried, scared even.

"Whatever happens, I'll keep Bella safe" I promised. Dad lifted his lips into a small smile. His next words were so low I couldn't be sure he said what I thought I heard, but as he lowered his head all I could comprehend were the words "But who'll keep you safe?"

…

The meeting ended soon after. As everyone stood Emily spoke "Won't you all stay for lunch? I have a pot of soup on the stove"

Everyone sat down immediately, everyone except me. "Thankyou for the offer, Em, but I ought to be getting home"

"You mean back to Bella" sniggered Embry.

"At least he has someone to be getting back to" said Leah.

Before anything could escalate my dad looked at me pointedly and said "Sam can drive me home in the car later. You run home to Bella. She'll be wondering where you are."

I nodded and smiled in thanks before making a dash for the door.

Once outside I phased and began to run in the direction of home.

**BPOV**

There I stood, alone in the kitchen.

As I listened to the car engine start outside I hopped down from the bench and hobbled over to the window over the sink, using my crutch to keep my balance.

I watched as Jake helped Billy into the car, folded up the wheelchair and placed it in the back before climbing into the driver's seat. The car engine started with a jolt and the faint smell of gasoline travelled through the open window as he putted off, down the driveway.

I sighed as the car's tiny shape disappeared around the corner. This was going to be a long couple of hours.

Turning from the sight of the empty driveway I limped across the kitchen and down the hall. I struggled when it came to pushing Jake's door open, but eventually managed to angle my crutch correctly and slowly shuffled inside.

It smelt so good in here. Jacob's sweet scent filled the air around me. Dropping the crutch on the floor I carefully made my way to the wardrobe. Upon pulling open the doors the strong aroma of toffee I had come to associate with Jake overcame my senses. It filled every crevice of my brain and consumed my whole body.

It smelt like heaven to me. Everything about his scent screamed that this was where I belonged. I was safe and warm in his embrace, walking hand-in-hand the beach of La Push or watching him from the passenger seat as he drove me home after a day of pure bliss.

I composed myself, and after bringing myself back to my senses, began hunting through a couple of draws. I pulled back when I found exactly what I wanted; an old white shirt, slightly creased from being shoved in the bottom draw for so long. It was one I remembered from the old days, when Jake had been smaller and less stocky. He had even been small in this, with it dangling over his massive jeans, but if he was to try this on now I doubted that it would reach past his waist. It would be huge on me, but I figured the bigger, the better. I didn't have any pants to wear as the ones I currently had on were smeared with cake batter, while any of Jake's would have fallen off me straight away. At least this way I could use his long shirt as a dress.

I tottered precariously out of Jake's room and into the bathroom across the hall.

After a moment of searching I found what I wanted in the cupboards. There was a small bottle of face wash in the back of the overhead cabinet and a fresh flannel under the sink. I splashed warm water over my face and squeezed a small dollop of face wash onto my hands before lathering it across my face.

It was amusing to see just how much cake batter I had smeared across my skin. There were traces in the most peculiar places; on my ear, under my chin, on the back of my neck. Although, when I took a closer look I noticed that these areas were shaped suspiciously like large fingerprints, pressing into my soft skin.

I smiled as I wet the flannel with warm water and wiped the now chocolate coloured bubbles from my face. Jake really did bring out the child in me. He managed to make me forget all my worries, even when my life was in mortal danger. His smile could always lighten my day and as soon as he began to speak my mind switched off to everything but the sound of his voice.

Once I had removed all traces of the sticky mixture from my face I moved on to the other parts of my body which had also been attacked. My arms, my hands, my thighs and my waist all had thin trails of chocolate substance traced across the pale skin there.

When I had finished washing up I stripped out of my dirty pants and t-shirt and slipped on Jake's oversized top. The fabric was soft against my skin and the excessive washing it had received over the years meant it flowed comfortably over my still damp skin.

I stared at my reflection in the tiny bathroom mirror. Other than the outline of my black bra, which could be seen quite clearly through the old white shirt, it actually didn't look half bad on me. As a finishing touch I took the belt from my cake covered pants and tied it around my waist, gathering it loosely and giving my feminine curves attention they rarely received.

_There,_ I thought. _Problem fixed._

Just as I had finished rinsing out the flannel the faint sound of an alarm came from down the hall.

*Ding* *Ding* it sounded, echoing off the bathroom tiles.

I repositioned my crutch under my arm and made my way to the kitchen.

…

The cake smelt magnificent. The sweet taste of chocolate filled my mouth as the scent washed through the house.

After it had cooled down somewhat I iced and decorated it with chocolaty goodness before putting it aside for later.

There was nothing else to do now but wait for Jake to arrive back from the meeting at Sam's house.

I looked out the window, onto the yard and noticed the forest swaying gently around me. The trees were huge, towering above everything, as far as the eye could see. They were somewhat gentle giants; never harming; only ever looking down upon us.

Then I saw it, the tiniest speck of red from inside Jake's shed. I remembered that my baby was still here for her long overdue check-up.

I hobbled out the front door and across the lawn as fast as I good without injuring myself even more.

I flung open the metal door, which had been left slightly ajar, and was met with the sight of my truck.

She was notably cleaner than before and the small dints which had rimmed her sides were gone for good.

I reached out to touch the bonnet carefully, taking in her beauty. My truck was still alive. We had been through so much together, and she had lived to tell the tale.

Being absorbed in the sight of my beautiful vehicle, I didn't notice the patter of paws on the floor and was only made aware of the fact that there was something else in the room when a small growl issued from behind me. I jumped and spun around on the spot, sighing with relief when I spotted the familiar russet brown fur.

"Gosh, Jake. You scared me" Jake's wolf form took up most of the shed. His great head nearly touched the tools and spare parts, which hung haphazardly from the roof. I watched as his enormous eyes widened and heard him growl yet again.

Shivers raced down my spine as the noise penetrated me. It was unlike anything I'd ever heard before. It wasn't protective, like usual, but instead it seemed possessive.

The huge wolf moved closer, his head tilted to the side slightly. "What?" I asked quietly. My voice shook, not with fear or uncertainty, but anticipation. The need and want in his usually soft wolf eyes was intangible. I could feel my knees buckling beneath me as I stepped back from the truck.

Suddenly Jake pounced. His massive wolf form pushed me back to the wall, there was a loud clatter as my crutch hit the floor and I screamed as the rush tipped my stomach upside down.

He stood on his hind legs, his front paws were placed either side of my face, trapping me amongst the warm fur.

I could smell hear and taste everything there was about Jake. The earthy smell of his soft fur consumed me as I pressed closer to his warm body. The sound of his growls reverberating through his chest as he breathed deeply filled the small space around me. I could even taste the sunshine I always imagined whenever Jake was around.

Lifting my good arm, I wrapped it partway around his huge torso as he bent his head to nuzzle at my neck. His wet nose drew lines along my skin and his sharp teeth scraped playfully along my collarbone. I gasped softly as he nipped at the exposed skin near the neckline of his shirt. I closed my eyes as he pushed me harder into the wall. I could feel the thick fur begin to shorten, the musky smell changed to the same scent I had fallen in love with in his bedroom and the low growling changed to a breathy pant.

I could feel warm flesh beneath my fingers, soft lips against my collar. I couldn't see. There was no way I was able to open my eyes when my body was reacting this way.

A small nip with his now human teeth caused me to gasp again and I searched blindly with my hand until I had my palm on the side of his face. I tugged him upwards and before I knew it those soft lips were on mine, taking them as his possession.

His tongue swept lightly across my bottom lip, causing me to gasp. Jake took the opportunity to reach further in to my mouth, exploring unknown territory. I flicked my tongue experimentally and was met with his quiet groan of approval.

The feelings that groan conjured in me were amazing. I needed more, harder kisses, stronger groans, rushes of feeling, always more.

My hand grasped tightly at his warm neck, pulling lips down harder onto mine.

I thought back to the kiss we'd shared earlier this morning. Something had changed. The way we responded to one another seemed less rehearsed. We were running off our desires and repressed urges. Each movement was fast and passionate as if we would die without it.

I ran my hand down his smooth skin, feeling the channels of muscle in his torso. It was only when I came to rest on his hip that I realised something that made me yelp in surprise…he was completely naked.

I don't know how this had managed to slip my mind, but as soon as my hand touched the soft skin covering his hipbone I remembered that when he changed back from a wolf, he wasn't wearing any clothing.

Jake heard my small cry and his passionate kisses ceased. "Bells, what's wrong?" he asked, his voice low and husky.

I pulled my hand away from his skin and covered my still closed eyes. "Bella?" His voice was filled with an emotion I couldn't place. Worry, confusion, hurt.

I simply shook my head from side to side, trying to work out what was happening.

Everything I felt was so overwhelming. I loved Jacob with my whole heart. I wanted him so badly, yet the mere thought that he was currently standing naked in front of me made me so scared that I couldn't speak at all.

I wished that I could have kept going. I wanted to show him just how much I loved him. Why did I have to be so scared?

Life is a gift. I should be taking every opportunity. This opportunity to show Jacob my undying love was bound to disappear soon. Nothing lasts forever, and knowing me, my life is bound to me shorter than anyone else's. My luck was bound to be wearing thin. I was in constant danger and the accident had proven that.

I could have died then and there. I would have never seen Charlie again, or my mum, or Jake. I would have never enjoyed another walk along la Push. Never to hold the hand of the one I loved, to see him smile, to watch him as he got down on one knee, to have my father walk me down the aisle, to say those lasting two words as Jake lifted my veil to seal our pact with a kiss, to go on our honeymoon, to see those bars on the pregnancy test, to watch my children grow, to sit on the front porch holding hands and reminiscing. I would have never had any of that.

My life is limited, perhaps more so than others. I was going to take things as they came and not worry about the consequences.

Without another thought I took my hand from my face and threw my arm around Jake's neck, pulling him in. His skin pressed to the thin material of the old shirt. I could feel the heat pouring off him as he squirmed beneath my touch as if to pull away. "No" I managed to gasp, tugging on his shoulder with all my strength as I attempted to keep his lips sealed with mine. However, Jake was much stronger. He gently pried my hand from his skin and pulled back slightly to look me in the eyes "Bella, what are you doing?"

"I need to show you" I half cried, kissing the skin on his neck, not wanting to make eye contact in fear that he would see the terrible things I just had.

Jake's hands came to hold either side of my face, dragging me away from his neck "Show me what?"

A tear trickled down my cheek as I looked up at him. Confusion clouded his eyes as he tried to understand my actions.

"How much I love you" I choked "I can't lose this opportunity to show you…I can't…if anything happened…" My emotions overcame me as my knees buckled and the world span.

Jake's arms came to the rescue, supporting me when I couldn't.

"Bells, you don't need to prove anything to me. Nothing's going to happen" His voice was reassuring, but my mind didn't want to believe it.

I sniffed and buried my face into his chest "You can't know that"

"I won't let it happen" he growled lowly "No-one is going to hurt you"

"What about you?" I asked quietly. Jake seemed confused "Who's going to look after you?" I questioned "I don't know what I'd do if I lost you"

"I'm not going anywhere, Bells. I'll be here as long as you want me"

"Again, how can you promise that?" I asked with a hint of anger in my voice.

"I can't" he answered simply. I shook my head against his warm skin "But I can promise you that I will do everything I can to make sure it doesn't happen. I won't leave you, Bella"

"I need to show you" I rebutted, but Jake cut in, silencing me by placing a finger against my lips.

"No, the last thing I want is for you to regret this. I want our first time to be perfect, and somehow I don't think this shed is particularly ideal."

"It will be perfect as long as you're there" I joked

"Oh, you'd better hope I'm there" he said playfully "Now close your eyes"

"Why?" I asked, mildly confused

"Because in case you've forgotten, I need to find some pants to put on"

"Oh" I yelped and covered my eyes once more with my uncast hand "whoops, sorry"

"Not a problem, love" Jake whispered and I felt the small peck of his lips on my cheek before he headed out of the shed.

…

_**Well, that's it for another instalment. This was not only very long, but also very difficult to write. Hence the huge amount of time it took me to complete.**_

_**Hope it lived up to your standards. Please tell me what you thought about 'jacob time'. Too much? Needs more? I would love some feedback.**_

_**Also the big showstopper I had planned for this chappy didn't quite fit so it will have to wait till next time.**_

_**As always, please review.**_

_**Galileo, Galileo, Figaro, magnificooooo **___

_**Haha, guess what song we sang for house choir ;)**_

_**Love you all, lee-leerose xx**_


	30. Closer to the Edge

_**Hey ya **___

_**Here it is. I know, I know, enough with the small talk. Read and enjoy. It's a quick one, but I'm not in the writing mood. One month till exams :/**_

_**Chapter 31: Closer to the Edge**_

**BPOV**

When Jake and I arrived home that evening it was already dark. Jake helped me out of the truck and placed my crutch beneath my arm before giving me a short, but sweet kiss goodbye. "I'll see you later, Bells" he whispered and turned away, running off down the road.

After much arguing he had let me have my truck back, only after I had promised that I wouldn't drive it until I was better. I watched as he ran off into the distance, no doubt readying himself to phase.

I turned back to the house. The windows were lit with an ominous glow. It spread thin lines of light across the front lawn, lighting my way as I hobbled towards the front steps.

Surprisingly the front door was open. I pulled back the flyscreen door before making my way inside. "Dad," I called cautiously "are you here?" There was no response. My heartbeat picked up its pace as I made my way through the front entrance and into the lounge room. Everything was just as it had been when I had left. The chairs sat facing the television on the opposite wall. The fireplace was full of burnt coal, cold and dark in the corner. A lamp cast a dim glow across the room causing me to strain my eyes as I searched. "Dad" I called again, uncertainty seeping through my voice.

She couldn't have come while I was gone. No. I would never forgive myself. If anything had happened to Charlie, then I don't know what I'd do.

I stopped to listen. Everything was quiet, bearing down upon me. That was until I called for the last time "Dad!"

A loud snorting sound resounded from across the living room as a familiar face popped up from behind the seat. "Oh, Bells. It's you"

Relief flooded me as I realised that Charlie was safe. He had only been asleep this whole time.

There was no Laurent. No Victoria. And no rogue newborn.

"How was your day, Bella?" Charlie asked as he wiped the sleep from his eyes.

"Good," I replied cautiously. A red light suddenly turned on in my head. Charlie never asked about my day. Usually he would just greet me and let me run off to my room. "Well," I said slowly, still not sure of his actions "I'll just go upstairs and have a shower…" I turned away and began walking towards the stairs.

Not before I had walked no more than a metre however, did Charlie call out behind me. "Bella, could you come back here for a moment please?"

I turned on the spot and looked up from the hair which framed my face, acting as a sort-of shield. "Why are you wearing Jacob's shirt?"

_Shit_. My mind ran wild, thinking up a million excuses - all of which sounded much worse than the truth. I decided that standing there like a stunned mullet in front of Charlie, who had one eyebrow raised in question, his fingers tapping on the arm of the couch, would probably make me look guiltier than I actually was. So I settled on telling the truth.

"Well," I started, knowing that no matter what I said right now, Charlie was going to have his suspicions. "Jake and I were baking a cake. My clothes were covered in batter so I put them in the wash at his place." Charlie raised an eyebrow at me, confirming my previous thoughts. "I promised to wash and return his clothes, Dad. It's no big deal"

"Oh, it's _no big deal_, is it?" he said. "What do you think goes through my mind when you're out after dark with your boyfriend, let alone when you return home wearing his clothes?"

"Dad," I groaned "I've got everything under control"

"Listen, Bells. You may think you can manage everything, but…well…" he seemed to be struggling for words "…you're only a teenager and…and, well…" Charlie's eyes darted around the room, meeting anything but my eyes. "…sometimes your feelings get in the way when you're young. Boys can pressure you into doing certain…_things_"

I could feel my muscles tense as I realised what he was trying to say. He was attempting to give me '_The Talk_'.

My cheeks were burning with embarrassment as I too looked away, staring at a particularly interesting strand of carpet.

"Dad, it's not like that" I spoke quietly, to the floor.

"Maybe not yet, but I should give you some warning. I can tell that Jake is very important to you. And with a good looking guy like him, sometimes a girl's body can…"

"I know you might think this is necessary," I said quickly, interrupting him before he could go on any further "but mum beat you to this conversation almost 10 years ago"

"You weren't in a serious relationship ten years ago" he rebutted. I could tell he was feeling just as alienated by this subject matter as I was.

"True, but I'm sure the mechanics haven't changed much in that time"

Charlie's eyes widened in surprise, "Fair point."

"Yeah," I said quietly "So, I'll just be upstairs having a shower"

"Hang on" Charlie spoke before I could turn away "Just promise me you'll be _safe_" His cheeks were bright red, his voice quavering, his mouth twitching slightly at the sides and his eyes focussed on a point just above my head. 'Nervous' was a word I rarely used to describe Charlie. He had always been the reassuring one. His position as Chief of Police meant that he always had to hold a strong view and set an example for others to follow. Right now however, his façade seemed to have slipped to show this less guarded and slightly embarrassed side of him.

"Uhh, sure thing." I said awkwardly "But Dad, you should know that I'm still a virgin"

"Alrighty" he said in a strong voice. It was as if his "Nice to know"

"Yeah" I said "I'll, uhh…" and with that I spun around and took the stairs as quickly as possible with my crutch under my arm.

…

It was warm beneath my doona as I lay snuggled up in the soft material of my sheets; though not as warm as I would have preferred it. The sound of the wind, tapping tree branches against my window, kept me in bed. The snores of Charlie had ended long ago when he had risen during the early hours of the morning for another of his and Billy's crazy fishing trips down by the stream.

Charlie and Billy were as determined as ever to continue their weekly ritual, even with the rapidly approaching winter weather. Its onslaught only made them more stubborn and defiant that they were going to do their male species proud by bringing home dinner.

Before the sun had even shown her rays I could hear Charlie puttering around downstairs, no doubt struggling with the small task of making a sandwich. In the drowsy state of sleep I could just make out the front door slamming shut and the police car revving slightly as he drove out of the driveway.

I had happily dozed off once again; falling into the dreamless state of contentment.

However, I now lay awake, battling with my mind as to whether or not I should get up on this fine morning. The god rays shining through the gap in my curtains promised a good day, however the teenager in me disregarded this and only wanted to lay here in complete bliss.

That was until I heard the faint buzzing of my phone as it vibrated against the wood of my bedside table.

With a small groan I rolled onto my side and reached out blindly, searching for the annoying object. My fingers grasped around the small cold mobile and I pulled it towards my little hovel of warmth. Flipping it open, I was surprised to see that the caller ID didn't read _Jake_, or _Charlie_, but rather _Billy._

I pressed the answer button and placed the phone to my ear. "Hey Billy" I said cheerfully, my voice still croaky from sleep "How are you?"

"Bella" he rasped "Bella, you have to come quickly"

"What?" I asked, confused "Come where?" I sat up in my bed. The cold of the room engulfed me, swooping in to chill my skin, raising the hairs on my arms and the back of my neck.

"Something's happened. Bella, we were fishing and…well, he's hurt"

I could feel my heart hammering painfully against my ribcage. Somehow I knew who it was; who had been hurt. But I needed to hear it. I had to be sure. "Who? Billy, _please_…"

"Charlie" Billy choked.

Everything stopped.

He was hurt.

_They_ had gotten to him.

Charlie.

A voice slipped into my frozen thoughts as I tried to comprehend what had happened. "I tried to stop them, Bells, but you know I can't _change_ anymore. Please, Bella, he's in a really bad way. Come quickly"

My mind snapped into crisis mode and before I knew it I was out of bed and putting on my jacket and Ugg boots. "I'm on my way, Billy. Where are you?"

"The Emergency Ward. Please Bella, I can't explain away everything. Charlie needs you"

I shut the phone with a snap and rushed out the door, still attempting to push my arm through the sleeve of my jacket. My the time I made it to the truck I had no time to think about how I was going to drive to the hospital with one usable hand and sore legs, but all I knew was that I couldn't wait another moment. Charlie was in trouble, and it was my entire fault.

…

I pulled up in front of the emergency ward. My truck screeched indignantly as I pulled hard on the hand brake and it shuddered to a stop.

Driving had proven to be difficult with only one arm. I had found that I could change gears while keeping my throbbing foot on the clutch if I performed this movement quickly and then returned my attention back to the steering wheel. Pressing on the accelerator had been a task in itself as my aching leg screamed in protest, but I pulled through and eventually made it to my destination in one piece.

I jumped out of the car and grabbed my crutch, limping towards the front entrance as fast as I could. The glass doors slid open for me, and a blast of warm air cascaded over my face. It would have been nice on that chilly day, had I not already been sweaty and anxious in light of Billy's phone call.

A middle aged, mousey haired woman sat at the front desk, her eyes downcast as she slurped from her coffee cup and nibbled on a biscuit. I hobbled over to her and the small tapping of my crutch on the floor seemed to awaken her to my presence. She took one look at my arm and the crutch I leant on and said "This ward is only for emergencies, dear. General check-ups are at the other entrance"

Her voice was sickly sweet, just like the chocolate biscuit she held between her badly manicured fingers. Crumbs fell with a small patter across an opened page of the glossy magazine she had been reading.

"I'm here to see my dad" I said in a strong voice. "I was told that he would be here"

"Oh, I see dear" She said, her sweet voice suddenly changing to something a bit more sincere "What was your name?"

"Isabella Swan" I replied, looking around the room nervously as she grabbed a file from a draw under the desk and began shuffling through some papers

"Daughter of Charlie Swan?" she said, raising an eyebrow questioningly

"Yes," I said "Billy Black was with him. He told me to come in straight away"

"Of course, Isabella. If you'll just follow me, I'll lead you to his room"

The woman stood up and turned to lead me down the hall. It was narrow and dark. The cold of winter was banished however, giving the place a strange feeling. I followed the woman as she turned the corner into another hall. "Have you been told the severity of his case?" She asked. Her voice echoed off the walls of the hall.

"No" I replied simply "Billy only said that he needed me here"

The woman sighed lightly "Well, my dear, you may find that he is a tad delirious. He also seems to have suffered a blow to the head"

"May I ask what happened exactly?" I asked. I realised that even though I myself knew who had done this, the doctors and nurses would never have believed that story.

"According to the man who was with him, the one in the wheelchair, they were out fishing by the river when a great bear came out of the forest. Can you believe it? I knew there had been sightings a couple of years ago, but for this to happen now…Anyway. The man said that the bear attacked and your father attempted to fight it off, but in the struggle the bear knocked him over and broke his leg and foot, while the bear's scratches also mark the rest of his body."

"Oh my God" I whispered. Tears rimmed my eyes. I had caused this. They had come in search of me but had gotten to Charlie first. "Did Billy say what happened to the bear after that?"

"Apparently there was a gunshot nearby and the bear ran off in fright. It's some scary stuff. I don't think I could handle it"

"Yeah" I mumbled "Scary"

"The thing is," the nurse continued, looking over her shoulder to glance at me "your father doesn't remember there being a bear at all"

"Oh, really?" I asked, cautiously "What does he remember?"

"He's been going on about a super-human figure with bright red eyes and skin as white as chalk."

"Sounds like he hit his head pretty hard then" I said, looking straight into her eyes.

"Yeah," she said slowly, stopping in the hallway "I suppose he did" She eyed me suspiciously for a moment before opening a door to her right "This is his room. Just make sure to be quiet. He's only just been given enough morphine for him to be able to rest"

I nodded "Thanks" and entered the dark room.

…

Billy had been telling the truth. Charlie was in a bad way.

His leg was in a cast, taped to the bed to stop him from moving it. Every now and again he would struggle against the bindings, screaming in fits of hysteria as he fought away whatever creature ravaged his dreams. I held his hand tightly, watching as his mouth opened and closed in gasps of horror. His eyes darted from side to side behind his eyelids. His head shook while his hand twitched beneath mine.

I was scared. Scared for his health; for what he had seen; for what he might believe to be real when he awoke.

When Charlie had quietened down for the third time I looked up at Billy. He sat across from me, ashen faced and solemn. His eyes never left Charlie's face, while his fingers were grasped tightly around the hand I couldn't reach.

He slowly shook his head from side to side, his face contoured in pain. "After all these years," He said in a gruff voice "I would have never thought it would be him. He's my best friend. He knows everything. _Everything_ except this _one_ secret I could never share. I never imagined how much it might hurt him in the end"

"What happened, Billy?" I asked quietly "The nurse said it was a bear, but I don't believe that"

"No," he replied "you're right. It wasn't a bear. It was a newborn"

I gasped. "Why would it attack you and Charlie?"

"Perhaps it meant to hurt him because of you, but it may have simply been hungry. Vampires can find it extremely difficult to control their thirst, especially those newly initiated to the lifestyle."

"How did you stop it? From what I've heard it must have been extremely strong"

Billy sighed. He seemed extremely tired. As I looked at him from across the bed I noticed the dark rings lining his features. They framed his eyes like dark bruises. "As you know, I am unable to shift to wolf form anymore. Luckily Sam, Embry and Quil were Patrolling the border nearby at the time. They heard the commotion and came to our rescue. I don't want to think about what might have happened had we chosen a different fishing spot. They chased her away."

'This is all my fault, Billy. I'm so sorry" I spoke from the bottom of my heart. These newborns were here because of me. Charlie was hurt because of me. Billy had been traumatised because of _me._

"Don't be _sorry_, Bella. It's not your fault that these _things_ exist."

"What do you think I should tell him?" I asked, wiping the tears away from my eyes with the sleeve of my jacket.

"Well," sighed Billy "He saw her clear as day. When they brought him in he was screaming about her. Those eyes, that skin. It's hard to forget, especially when they attack. It's feral, unlike any human nature. I'd bet that he won't forget any of it. It will stick in his mind for years to come. You may have no choice but to tell him"

"I'm not sure I can do that, Billy. What if he thinks I'm insane?" I looked down at my hand, rubbing small circles gently across my father's hand.

"After what he'sbeen through, any explanation would be appreciated. He'll be happy to know that _he's_ not insane."

…

It had been two days. Two days of waiting, wondering, worrying.

I sat beside Charlie's bed, slumped forwards so that my head leant against my hands, which covered his.

He had not yet woken from his morphine induced sleep. The nurses said that he needed to rest. He had been shocked, had bones broken and skin torn. His body and mind were tired.

I had spent the past days thinking about how I would explain this situation to my dad.

Would he believe me? How much would I tell him? Would he hate me for keeping this a secret for so long?

All these questions swam through my mind, desperately searching for some answers, but coming up empty.

I heard the quiet click of the door as it opened and raised my head slightly to see who it was.

Jake stood across the room, closing the door quietly behind him. "How is he?" he asked in a low voice

"Nothing's changed" I sighed, removing my hands from atop my fathers as I stood up and walked over to Jake.

His arms were wide open, an invitation which I took gladly. I snuggled into the chest, revelling in the closeness and the feeling of normality he brought with him.

Jake had visited the hospital many times over the last couple of days, dropping in to feed me and keep me company while I watched over my sleeping father.

"He'll get better." Jake spoke into my hair, rubbing my arm slowly with one hand while his other rested on my lower back, pulling me closer.

"That's what I'm worried about" I admitted. Jake pulled back to meet my eyes and gave me a quizzical look. "I don't know how to tell him about…well, _everything_"

We stood there for a moment, Jake looking down at Charlie, thoughtfully, before he looked back to me, a small smile on his lips. "When he wakes up, he's going to have questions."

I nodded, confused. That was pretty obvious "And?"

"_And_, we explain as little as we can to answer those questions"

I shook my head in protest "No, Jake. That won't help. He'll want to know more than just the tip of the iceberg. He _deserves_ to know more."

"I know, I know. I haven't finished yet." Jake chastised "What if we sent him to live with Sue for a few days?"

"Sue Clearwater?" I asked. Jake nodded in confirmation.

"She could explain the basics for you. Everything about vampires and the like"

"What makes you think he'll believe her?"

"For one, she has two teenage children who can illustrate the fact. For another, Charlie sees her as an everyday person, just like him. She's been thrown into this life just as much as he has. She can also explain about the imprinting and the whole works. You would only need to explain the specifics"

"I don't know…" I said cautiously.

"Bells, you're not ready for this. I can see it in your eyes. He's better off getting the whole story from someone who's lived with the facts for most of her life, rather than to get half the story from his daughter who will most likely withhold information in the hope that he won't be hurt"

I looked up at Jake with wide eyes "You really do know me far too well"

"What can I say?" He said, smiling widely "I love you"

"I love you too" I said and kissed him full on the lips.

…

_**I could have done better than this so now it's going to annoy me for ages. But I decided that since it's been almost an entire month since my last update you guys deserved another chapter sooner rather than later. Hopefully it wasn't too bad. It's a bit out of my comfort zone. This is probably because I had nothing much to go on in the way of precedence, as I've tried not to read any fanfiction where Bella has to tell Charlie about the whole **_**situation**_**. However, I'd like to hear your thoughts on the subject. Good/Bad/made you physically ill, review and let me know.**_

_**Thanks,**_

_**Royal weddings and **_**"you look beautiful"**_**'s from the groom ;)**_

_**Lee-leerose xx**_


	31. Hey Now

_**Hey, long time no update, right? Sorry about that. I really hate how school inflicts on my writing. It's just not fair that it takes up so much time. I mean, we spend 6 hours a day at school and then we have to come home and do 3 or 4 hours of study every night, then maybe 5 hours a day on the weekend just to keep up. It's ridiculous! But I suppose there's nothing I can do about it, so I'll just have to keep pottering along as is. **_

_**Thank you all for your kind words of support for my exams. They were okay. And I didn't die, so that has to be a bonus, right? We got the results back today and it seems that I did quite well across the board so I'm pleasantly surprised (except for the one I failed…but we don't worry about that). :D**_

_**Again, I am not Steph Meyer…nor will I ever be. Chapter Song is by Prime Circle. Look them up! They're a fave of mine. Good ones include "She always gets what she wants", "Consider me" and "Breathing". Enjoy!**_

**Chapter 31: Hey Now**

**BPOV**

The steady beep of Charlie's heart filled the silent room as I sat at the head of his bed. Even with the winter rains tormenting life outside, within the hospital the temperature remained warm for its' occupants' health. Hot air spurred lazily across the small space from the outlet near the door, causing the pulled curtains of the window to sway ominously.

My dad lay on his back. The thin white hospital grade bed sheet covered the healing scars on his legs and arms. The bandages that bound his limbs had been removed only two days before. Images of the nasty red scars, where the vampire's sharp nails had torn his skin, remained glued to my every thought.

I sat in guilt, wishing that it would all be okay. I wanted desperately for things to be the way they were before - for Charlie to remain oblivious to this world of the supernatural; unobservant and hence unharmed. However this was never to be the case. He was to be discharged this evening. And soon he would know about it all.

There was no doubt that I was scared. Everything was moving around me and I felt as if I had no control over any of it. It's like sitting in the passenger seat, watching as the driver slams their foot on the pedal, and there's nothing you can do but watch the scenery fly past.

First and foremost I was afraid of Charlie's reaction. I had no idea how he would respond to the existence of things as insane as Vampires and Wolves. My mind conjured up scenes of fury and mistrust. I was continually reminded of the look of hurt I had seen in his eyes the night I'd left home to keep him safe from James. Leaving him that night had been one of the hardest things I had ever had to do. It felt like only yesterday when I saw the heart wrenching pain radiate through his being. This did nothing to calm my feelings at the present moment.

Consumed by thought, I was unaware of the quickening beep of the heart monitor as Charlie moved from his dream world to the real world. The first sign I noticed of his awakening was the gentle squeeze of his calloused fingers on mine. I started, and looked straight down into the face of my father.

Over the past week he had woken sporadically from his sleep to scream of the terrors that haunted him. Every moment I saw his eyes open my heart crushed a little bit more. Those usually bright brown orbs –not unlike my own- were crazed, confused, scared and questioning, all at the same time. It was torture to have to watch the nurse admission a drug into his veins so that he would re-enter the tranquil state of sleep. For the first time in my life I had found that the idea of a needle entering the skin was not sickening to me. I had found something much worse with the situation. It was the horrible truth that _I_ had caused this. _I_ was the reason he was screaming in fear of these _creatures_. I was as much a monster as they were.

However, as Charlie opened his eyes to the world this morning, something seemed different from the times before. The animalistic trait was void from his gaze as he looked up at me. A tear threatened to escape down my cheek as relief flooded through me. "Dad" I spoke softly, repeating the gesture of squeezing his fingers gently. "You're alright".

This last statement was more to convince myself of his sanity, than for any benefit on his part. But he smiled graciously up at me none-the-less. His dark eyes took in my tired features; the dark rings around my eyes, my tousled hair tucked haphazardly behind my ears.

"Bella" he spoke "I had the most horrible dream…I…what...who..." His voice broke as confusion clouded his expression. The lines etched into his forehead from years of stress in the police force stood out, more noticeable than ever in his puzzled state. His lips quivered slightly as he tried to force out whatever his mind was screaming at him to say.

Seeing his pain I shushed him quickly, biting my lip in thought. I couldn't do this. I couldn't be the one to tell him. I was a coward. I wasn't ready.

"Dad," I began "I know you have questions, so many questions. But I…" my voice broke. Charlie, my _dad_ was on the verge of tears. Somewhere in my mind I knew that I had to keep it together. But seeing him so raw and unprotected tore a hole in my soul. I swallowed defiantly and continued, "…I can't answer them for you. I don't know how to explain it. But I promise that you'll know everything soon enough. Jake's coming this afternoon to sign some paperwork and when you're discharged we'll take you to stay with Sue Clearwater."

The lines on my dad's face deepened, as though being permanently etched in stone. "Please, Dad. This is for the best. You have to understand that I'm not the best candidate to explain things right now. Sue can help you. Ask her anything you need to know. No doubt you'll have questions about my life and how I fit into all this, and perhaps one day we can discuss the specifics, but not right now. Not when I might fall apart while doing so." I looked down at our hands and clasped his fingers more tightly in mine "Please, understand. _I_ can't do this right now. But you deserve to know the truth"

"I understand," came Charlie's gruff voice from above me. I looked up into his sad eyes and offered a small smile of comfort. He lifted his lips slightly in response and my heart was filled with hope once more. "I love you" he said quietly.

"I love you more," I whispered as the winds continued to rip life from the trees outside.

….

Dropping Charlie off at Sue's was easier than I had imagined. In an effort to make me feel better about leaving my emotionally fragile father in a strange place with people I barely knew, Sue had promised with all her heart that she would take good care of Charlie.

Her plan was to let him in on the idea slowly. She would mention small facts, leave books about wolves and vampires lying on the coffee table for him to read in his spare time, as well as invite him to listen to her nightly telling of the Pack's stories (which had been recommenced for Charlie's benefit, after years of Seth and Leah arguing that they were 'too old' for bedtime stories).

I shed a single tear – which was far less than expected - as we drove away. My spirits were high as I smiled back at my dad, who sat bound to his wheelchair on Sue's porch. Seth stood behind him and sent a look of sympathy in my direction. I raised my bandaged hand to wave goodbye just as Jake turned to leave the driveway, and I saw Charlie lift his hand to wave back slowly; the silvery scars like furious paint strokes glinting in the sunlight.

…

**JPOV**

Bella was silent on the drive back to her house. She hadn't even asked to take the wheel, which I found concerning. I put it all down to the fact that she had much bigger things to worry about these days than the meagre fact that I wouldn't allow her to drive with a broken hand. Her legs had healed well over the past weeks. She hadn't seemed to notice the improvement in her stance, but her limp has dissipated during her days spent at the hospital. She could even stand for long periods of time without my assistance.

When we arrived at her house she exited the vehicle and walked to the door without speaking a word. I followed behind her, watching her every move to make sure that she was okay. There was no sign of distress. Her hands were steady as she retrieved the key from beneath the doormat and fit it in the lock. Her gaze was even as she walked through the entryway and into the kitchen. Not once did she glitch or stutter. None of the normal breakdown signs were there. And for this I was grateful.

Bella had been through far too much, and something inside me – perhaps my wolf instincts – told me that it was about to get much worse

…

An angel. That's what she was. My Bella was an angel and nothing less.

Her dark brown hair splayed across my chest like silk, cascading down her shoulder and back. Her features were relaxed as her eyelids fluttered slightly in her sleep. There was something reassuring about the way she lay with her face pressed to my side, her hand on my chest. She didn't cling to me as she had in the past. There was a strength residing within her now that seeped into everything she did; even in sleep.

Since Charlie's attack something had changed in her. It was as though she had accepted that this world of normality was no longer safe from that of the supernatural. They intermingled. Playing like leaves in the breeze, swirling around each other, never far apart. Whatever the direction of one, the other would follow, not far behind. Now that she had accepted this maybe things would be easier…

I had thought that over time the onslaught of emotions I felt at Bella's touch would fade as they became more familiar. However, at this moment it seemed that every feeling was more pronounced. The tiny gesture of her hand, laying palm down on my chest, her fingers lightly curled so that her nails tickled my sensitive skin drew a mixture of sensations from within.

Even though I was much warmer than her (due to my wolfish nature), her touch felt like a flame on my skin wherever our bodies connected. It was as though invisible trails were being etched into my skin. They remained there, always, and became more prominent when she wasn't near, reminding me of her radiating presence.

My heart beat loudly in my chest, thumping hard against my ribs. I hoped against hope that it wouldn't cause my angel to wake. Her sleeping form was too adorable to give up. Those dark brown eyes remained hidden behind closed lids while the small amount of moonlight creeping through the gap in the curtains caused her long eyelashes to cast dark shadows across her rouged cheeks. Those lips, so soft and addictive, were parted slightly in welcome. It was tantalising. My own angel, fallen from heaven.

Her petite form caused the imprint inside of me to curl his arm more securely around her waist. I knew that she was strong. There was no denying that, after all she had been through, she could not take care of herself. However, I still felt a sense of responsibility for her. I would never forgive myself if something happened to this woman, whom I loved with my whole heart.

It was because of this last revelation, however, that I forced myself to release Bella from my embrace, letting her head rest on the pillow instead. Bella moaned quietly in response, showing her discontent as her eyebrows knitted together in confusion. Her hand stretched out across the bed, beckoning me back. For a moment I thought that there was no way that she needed me as much as I needed her at this time. She could sleep happily without me, but as I stood beside the bed it took everything I had not to lay straight back down next to this sleeping girl.

Before I could change my mind I turned to her bedroom door and left without a sound, closing it gently behind me.

…

As I stood on the dampened dirt of the forest near the Swan residence I was overcome with the urge to leave the area. It felt unnatural. Wolf blood tingled in my veins, warning me that I was standing on enemy land. Everything about the Cullen's territory felt wrong. The smell was off; too sweet and perfect for a natural environment. There was even something about the way the moonlight shone through the gaps in the trees that seemed off-putting.

I stared around the small clearing, searching for a sign, a glimmer, anything that might allude to _his_ presence. But nothing changed. The trees remained eerily still in the encroaching woodland, the branches bearing in around me.

How on earth was I meant to let him know that I was looking for him? I didn't even know if he was here, let alone if he could hear my mind from where he was. Thinking I would sound downright insane, I thought his name to myself, hoping against hope that he would be listening "Edward, we need to talk".

Within seconds there was a slight breeze as he appeared soundlessly in front of me. He was as white as ever; although he still seemed to hold that same respectable poise that I had noticed when I had visited his house.

"Jacob," he said in a way of greeting. Then, getting straight to the point, he asked the ever-posed question, "How is she?"

"Not good" I replied gruffly. Although I appreciated his concern, this was_ my_ girl who he was so concerned about, and even if it was a nice thought, it was still coming from_ his_ head, and therefore grated against my being. I didn't want to spend time simply sharing Bella's feelings with _him_, however. This was not why I was here. "I take it that you've heard about Charlie?"

Edward nodded solemnly "Horror consumes me at the thought that if I had been there, I might have been able to stop _the_ attack. I wish that I had been in the area to help, but I was on the other side of town. I followed the scent of another of my kind which was again different from that found in Bella's room."

"There's _another_ one?" I asked in surprise "Did you catch it?"

Edward shook his head sadly, "No."

"Did you at least manage to follow the trail of the one that attacked Charlie?" I felt eager for information, as if this answer would bring everything into light.

"Yes, but not far. Again, she was unlike those before her." Edward took an unneeded breath of air. This situation was clearly unsettling for him "I have a bad feeling about this, Jacob. Something isn't right. There shouldn't be this many newborns around." He shook his head in confusion "Usually my kind finds it near impossible to stop feeding, let alone long enough for the venom to spread, but for so many to be reborn, it makes me think that their presence is not a coincidence."

I repressed a shiver at the thought of someone…or in this case some_thing_ purposefully creating these monsters.

Edward looked directly at me, his eyes pleading "This is getting worse, Jacob. We need to call on the rest of my family. They can help."

I bit my lip. There was nothing more I wanted than Bella's safety, but bringing more vampires into the situation went against my nature. Not only that, but I had no idea what pain the reappearance of the Cullen clan might do to my angel. She was stronger than before; I could give her that. But I wasn't sure if she could handle the onslaught of so many memories at once.

My internal battle did not go unnoticed by Edward, who spoke once more "It's the only way she'll be safe, Jacob"

How could I say no to that?

My Bella.

Safe.

Secure.

It was more than I could ever dream for.

"Fine" I said in a short puff "Make the call."

Edward's eyes, always so concerned, zoned in on my face, reading my emotions, while he no doubt picked through my mind "How will you tell her?"

"You have your job, I have mine. So, just make the call and don't worry about me. _I'm _not planning on hurting her" It was harsh, and I knew it. But at that moment, I didn't care.

Edward didn't react to my words, but instead looked at me with a steady gaze. "I know." He turned to walk away, back into the frosty night and called over his shoulder "We'll be living in the house again, so Carlisle will be required to attend work, and Esmé to do the weekly shopping so as to not arouse suspicion. I'll tell them not to interfere with her life. We're here to make things better, not to wind back her progress. That's the best I can do." and with that he was gone.

All I could think about now was my Bella, and how on earth she would accept her future.

_**There we are. Another chapter down! **___

_**Was it good? It was a bit shorter than I had originally planned, but I think it worked better with the flow of ideas. It took me some time to put everything together and work out how the plot would join, but I'm rather proud of this little baby. I took care to pay attention to detail, especially in the first scene with Charlie. However, I was sick when I wrote that list scene, so please excuse any flaws. Last note (I promise **____**) I know how much you all loved the strong Bella, so I've made her a bit less dependent in this one. I'll be putting up a poll on my profile for you to vote on whether you like the strong Bella who can stand on her own, or the dependent Bella who needs Jacob, or a good mix of both! Please take the time to vote as it will determine her character for the rest of the fanfiction **____** Finally, please review! It means the world to me, and helps when writing the next chapter. Plus, we need to crack the fantastic 200 reviews! :D**_

_**Hugs and best wishes for the coming days,**_

_**Lee-leerose xx**_


	32. All My Life

_**Sorry, sorry, sorry! This lateness is becoming the norm for me…urgh! I wouldn't blame you if you hate me. I would hate me too, so don't worry. Take this chapter as an apology on my part. I've tried to work on the intricate details and have focussed on the actual writing rather than the story – although the plot plays a huge part nonetheless. **_

_**Please excuse any mistakes. I may get a beta for the next fanfiction…but then again, maybe not as I can't keep to a writing schedule and that would be highly annoying for someone to edit. I think my writing may be improving though, so I guess it depends on whether you guys think I need a beta…? **_

_**Chapter song by Krezip. Love this band. Too bad they broke up a few years back.**_

_**See you at the end,**_

_**lee-leerose xx**_

**Chapter 32: All my Life**

**BPOV**

It had been a week since Charlie had been released from hospital and despite the fact that Sue had sent word of his progress with Seth every couple of days my nerves were still buzzing like wild fire. She said that things seemed to be going well. Charlie had been hesitant to believe them at first, but after a 'shocking demonstration' from Leah, he had come to accept the Clearwater's story. I admit that knowing this relieved me slightly. Charlie had taken the first step to understanding my story and the world he was so thoroughly submerged in.

According to Sue, it would be another day or so before my dad would be able to return home with his newly found information. Even though he understood my situation and why I had been unable to share this secret with him, he was still unsure about how he would react to his daughter and her supernatural boyfriend.

I could respect this. His past had been so mixed up in this world of Vampires and Wolves that it had affected him in many ways, completely without his knowledge. This had to be a blow to his aura because as the Head of Police in Forks he was often in the know about obscure happenings in his small town. Yet for the past year or so he hadn't come close to realising the reasons why his daughter had fallen head over heels for a boy she had only just met. Not only that, but why when everything seemed to be going just fine, she ran away from home for no apparent reason, using the excuse that she hated Forks and did not want to be kept prisoner there like his ex-wife. Then, when her boyfriend had left her, she screamed with pain for nights on end, before finally finding someone to fill the hole in her chest. These occasions could not have been easy on him, and I wanted to soften the blow as much as possible.

If the only thing my father needed was time, I would give it to him. It was the least he deserved after having spent such a long time in the dark. Anyway, it turned out that having Charlie out of the house had its benefits.

Jake had stayed with me all week; not needing to hide his presence or sneak in through my window in the dark of night. He was able to come and go as he pleased.

It was like I was catching a glimpse of the future. Jake would come home from Pack meetings, take his shoes off at the door and exclaim how fantastic dinner smelt. He would come up behind me, wrap his arms around my waist and kiss my neck softly, pulling me back against his warm chest.

After dinner we would retire to play a card game – which Jake almost always won – or snuggle up in front of the television to watch a movie – always the lady's choice – before Jake would carry my exhausted form ceremoniously upstairs to bed.

Playing 'house' with Jake was fun. Not just fun, but something about it felt right. I could imagine us doing this for years to come and never getting bored or losing love towards one another.

Today was another one of those days. We had finished washing up after dinner when Jake suggested that we watch a movie. Once again it was my choice. It took me less than a minute to find the film I wanted and I slipped it into the DVD player before Jake had time to say anything.

I was wrapped tightly in Jake's arms by the time the title showed on the screen. I could feel Jake snigger behind me "Titanic, really?"

Looking up at him, I attempted to sound hurt and played my best 'lost puppy' look. "It's my favourite, Jake." I moaned, drawing out his name in a child-like complaining tone. "How could you not appreciate the cinematic brilliance of James Cameron?"

He sniggered in response, "I established that it's your favourite the second time we watched it. But don't you think that three times in one week is a bit much?"

"One can never have enough Leonardo Di Caprio," I rebutted, turning back to the screen.

Truth be told, I knew this movie from back to front, which was primarily the reason I had chosen to watch it again. I didn't want to spend my time trying to follow the story line or listen to the words being spoken while I was snuggled up against the toned chest of my metaphorically – and physically – 'hot' boyfriend. Instead, I wanted to concentrate on the way that Jake's arms encircled me. How each breath constricted my movements and pulled me closer to him. It was more than I could ever dream of, and I wanted to make the most of it.

The way his heart beat strongly in my ears sent mine into a flutter and before long I found myself paying no attention to the film at all. My fingers traced the faint blue tainted veins beneath his skin, trailing in spirals from his elbow to his wrist. His dark skin contrasted strongly with my pale complexion, and I marvelled at how the lighter colour of his palm was still darker than the most tanned part of me (most probably my shoulders).

I was so consumed by Jake, that I didn't notice when my favourite part of the movie came until Jake swept back the hair over my ear to whisper the magic line.

"Where to, Miss?"

My heart skipped a beat. There was no way I could ever look at Leonardo in the same manner again. Jake was much better than he was. The way he spoke the words was…there was no other way to describe it…_sexy_. The feeling that coursed through me at that very moment was one of complete love and devotion. Without thinking, I replied, playing along, "To the stars".

My voice, although scratchier than Kate Winslet's, seemed to bring a smile to Jake's face, as I felt his lips press into my hair. There was no way I was ever letting this go. It felt as though I too was being swept away by the arms of love. Jake was my personal Jack, and I was his Rose. I smiled widely and cuddled back into his stomach, letting myself fall into the perfectness of it all.

It couldn't have been long before I fell asleep. And Jake, like so many nights before, switched off the movie and with one arm under my knees and the other supporting my back carried me up the stairs to tuck me into bed before lying down beside me to stroke my hair as I remained in my sweet abyss.

…

**JPOV**

I had been at Bella's for just under a week. It wasn't as though I was complaining; far from it actually. Bella and I were living together under the same roof. There was no Charlie to hurry me away as night fell, or to hide from as I crept in through her window. We were blissfully alone; and I loved every moment of it.

There was however, one small detail that lingered on my mind…how was I to tell Bella about the return of the Cullen clan? I knew that she despised them for putting her through hell. I didn't blame her. I myself was not choked up with happiness about the recent decision, but it was necessary for her safety.

Her safety.

This was not something she seemed to agree with me on. Bella was a strong woman, there was no denying it. She had been through a lot more than most women her age and yet continued to blossom each and every day. But I was terrified of her reaction to the return of her 'ex-family', and not to mention of Edward himself. It would break her. No matter how strong a resistance she had built up, it would all come tumbling down.

Whatever her response, I would take the hit, and welcome her wrath and pain as mine. It would be my fault and I would take the blame. The Cullen's were, after all, returning upon my word. _I_ had given the okay. _Me_. Of all people, who was _I_ to have the right to make that decision? Even if I _had_ done it for her benefit, it still didn't sit well with my conscience. I was beginning to rethink my actions as the uncertainty of what lay ahead clouded my vision.

I only had a couple of nights left before Charlie would return, after which my time alone with Bella would be stretched thin as a melting icecap. The issue of her Father's sanity and his inclusion in the supernatural world would be the only thing occupying her mind from then on; so it was now or never.

"Bella" I whispered in a small, unsure voice, so unlike my usual strong tone. "Are you awake?"  
There was no reply. She was sound asleep, my angel, my Bells.

My hand began to move of its own accord, drawing feather light lines as I drew my fingers over her waist. I trailed my short nails across to her spine, moving up to her shoulder blades, visible beneath her strappy singlet. Even in winter weather my body warmth was enough to make her sweat if she wore long sleeved shirts and full length pants to bed. Therefore Bella had opted for a simple black singlet and stripy rainbow boxer shorts. And I was making no effort to argue against the extra skin this outfit so conveniently exposed.

My hand made its way to her shoulder, where her pale smooth skin was shielded by a curtain of long dark hair. I carefully pulled away the silky barrier, sliding my palm over her shoulder. She was so beautiful and her skin was just so soft. Bella often spoke aloud about how much she loved my hands and the way my palms worked, massaging the knots out of her back and neck. She took any opportunity to take hold of my hand, intertwining our fingers as I swung them between us to show the world that she was mine.

After a moment I became conscious of a change in the air. A feeling of electricity ran through the room. Bella's heartbeat picked up its pace slightly as she rolled to face me. "Jake?" came her quiet whisper of a voice, barely audible above the howling winds outside. My own heart took a leap at the sound of her voice, for more reasons than one.

"Bells," I said softly "Shh, I'm sorry I woke you."

"What were you doing?" she asked sleepily, arching her back to stretch.

"I was admiring my precious girlfriend. But you can go back to sleep, babe." In an attempt to lull her back to sleep I reached up my hand to draw faint lines across her eyes and cheeks, following the contours of her features to the dip above her lips.

"I think I'd prefer to stay awake just now. I don't want to miss anything." She breathed with parted lips, her voice raspy with sleep.

I leant down and met her lips with mine. They were soft, even more so than her skin - if that were possible. After a moment I pulled away, my mind completely overcome by her touch, and smell, and taste. My head was clouded as though I was drunk, intoxicated. That's it. I was intoxicated by Bella. Everything about her was invigorating to my sharp senses. Our breaths mingled in the small space that now lay between us. Bella's chest heaved heavily and her eyelids fluttered as she spoke "Yep, definitely too good to miss". She leant in once more, her face inches from mine when my mind halted and I did the unthinkable.

I pulled back.

Bella's dark eyes flooded with hurt at my retreat. I had rejected her, and she felt the sting as sharp as a needle in her heart. Pain prickled under her skin as she too pulled back, untangling her arms from my hair – where they had somehow made themselves home in the last few moments without me noticing.

"Bells…" I said in a voice full of regret.

Bella only shook her head with wilful determination, as though fighting back the tears. "I'm fine" she said softly "I understand. You need some time to yourself"

"That's not it" I said quickly, my hands rubbing soothingly on her arms, searching for some contact after having pulled away well before I would have liked. I yearned for her to understand. I opened my mouth to explain. I wanted to tell her everything, about the Cullens, about Edward, about his plan to keep her safe, but I couldn't. My mouth opened and closed systematically as I searched for the words to make things clear.

Bella's hurt turned almost immediately to worry and concern. Her eyes widened and with an audible gasp she asked "What's wrong? Has someone been hurt?" Her palm reached up to cup my cheek as her eyes searched mine for an answer.

"No, no. It's not that, it's just…" I shook my head, trying to clear the befuddlement. This was not the way I had planned on telling her. I needed more time to think this through. It was going to come out wrong. I would hurt her; the person I cared the most for in the whole world. "Do you remember when we promised that we wouldn't keep secrets from each another any more?" Bella nodded with knotted brows. "Well, there's something you need to know…" I trailed off, leaving the words hanging in the air around us. They were like balls of fire fire, willing you to reach out and grab at them, to look closer, yet the hurt they could impend was scary and so dangerously enticing.

Bella took a breath and spoke with an assured tone "Tell me,"

I felt cornered, the air constricting. Fire consumed me. There was no way out. She had given me permission to hurt to, to deliver the final blow. "But…it will hurt." I said quietly.

Bella's conviction was close to terrifying as she spoke once more in a demanding manner, "Tell me, Jake. Tell me."

_**You all knew that it has to happen. After the next chapter I promise that Bella will be stronger. This is the turning point for her. Now she has to decide to either face her fears or go on living as if nothing had ever happened. We'll see what direction she takes next time. **_

_**I feel so horrible because I'm losing inspiration for this story. There's just something about writing it…the fire's not there anymore…If you know what I mean, I commend you. It takes a fair bit of effort to understand the way my mind works. I suppose you all know the way to help with this. Reviews = inspiration. Simple as that. I promise that as long as you guys keep interested in the story I will try my hardest to complete it.**_

_**Also, I'm deleting my other fanfiction, "Defying Confusion" as I haven't updated in yonks and I don't think I ever will. **_

_**And just quietly, if I can't have Jacob, I bags Leonardo. I don't care if he's dating Blake Lively. He's mine. ;) **_

_**Until the next (hopefully to be delivered relatively soon) chapter,**_

_**Sunshine and lollipops,**_

_**lee-leerose xx**_


	33. Don't Crush Me

_**This chapter is a key part of the plot and that is the reason I am using for its lateness. It took a lot of thought and word processing to get it up to scratch.  
Please forgive me. This is becoming a very bad habit, but just like my horrible nail-biting habit I had, I shall break it. Hakuna Matata **____**  
The song choice here is one by**_** Krezip**_**. Enjoy xx**_

**33. Don't Crush Me**

**BPOV**

Jake sat up and rubbed his eyes in frustration. His short nails dug into his skin, pressing back into his temples and causing his dark skin to pale slightly before a rush of colour returned when his fingers moved back to run through his short hair.

I watched as he stood and began to pace back and forth across the room. I raised myself into a sitting position on the bed so that I could see him more clearly.

He was agitated, scared, upset. I hadn't seen him like this since the day he'd first phased into a wolf in front of me. For a moment, I wasn't sure that I still wanted to know what it was that he needed to tell me. But the thought only lasted a mere second. I was being a coward. I thought of how strong Jake was to divulge this secret to me, and drew my power from this. I needed to know. I had to hear it from his mouth as truth, even if I already knew deep down what this was about.

_Him._

My heart beat fast as I shared his anxious behaviour; my mind feeding off his vibes. My fingers clutched at the now cold blankets, which had collected around my waist. The thin material of the silky doona cover slid over my skin like water as I tried to hold it in my grip. I settled with pulling the smooth fabric tighter around me, hoping for it to give some form of comfort as I stared at my restless boyfriend.

After a minute or so Jake turned to me. His mouth opened once and stuttered a small note, before closing. He tried once more, this time managing a gruff noise, somewhat like the sound one might make while trying to clear their throat.

After un-wrapping the blankets from around my legs, I stood and walked slowly over to where Jake now stood, turned so that he faced the opposite wall. I lifted my hand and placed a palm gently against his shoulder, willing for him to turn.

Jake rotated on the spot, gradually bringing his face into view, visible only by the soft glow of the moon, which streamed in through the window. A single, thin strip of moisture glinted in the near-dark room. My brain clicked as it recognised the trail left by a single tear.

"Jake" I spoke softly, moving my hand tenderly to his cheek. "Please, just tell me."

With a great shudder, Jake opened his mouth, and finally, he was able to speak.

Never had I imagined that I would be strong again after Edward had left me. It had never occurred to me, downtrodden as I had been that I would be able to hold myself tall after what he had put me through. The furthest thought from my mind was that I would have been capable of thinking his name or be able to imagine his pale skin and mesmerizingly golden eyes. But at this moment, I could.

Jake explained Edward's presence in Forks at this very moment. He talked about how Edward had returned that night he found me cowering in the forest, after I had seen the silver Volvo. As I had suspected at the time, it had been Edward in the car. His eyes had been those which had pierced my soul and sent me running in a mess of tears and memories. Jake made it clear that he hadn't wanted him anywhere near me, but Edward had insisted on helping to keep Victoria and Laurent away.

Everything seemed to make sense as Jake described how Edward had followed me to La Push the day I had ridden the motorcycle. How he had removed the heavy lump of metal from my body before its weight could crush the life out of me. How he had needed to retreat before the call of my blood became too strong for him to resist.

My mind was whirring away as all the tiniest details, the minute coincidences slid into place.

He mentioned the return of the Cullen family, and my mind turned into fuzz; a mixture between happiness and angst.

I was no longer hurting. My mind screamed Edward's name over and over, and yet no tears managed to surface. Perhaps I was going crazy. The months of pain and suffering had finally reached a brink of unfathomable aching, so strong that it simply felt numb. Although, how could I ever be sure? If I ever tried to mention Vampires in the vicinity of a Psych they would call me mad, even if it _was_ the truth.

No. This time it was different. There was no hole or distraught feeling bubbling beneath the surface. It felt as though I were floating dreamily in a place of complete and utter peace.

Jake shuddered beneath me and I realised that he had turned toward my chest, his face nuzzled into my neck, his arms encircling my waist, as though holding on for dear life.

I reciprocated the movement, twisting my arms so they held tightly under his arms, pulling his upper back forwards. "Thankyou, Jake. Thankyou"

_**So, another short chappie again...a dismal 850ish words :/ Sorry, this is getting extremely hard to write. Hopefully I become inspired soon. Thankyou for all you fabulous reviews. However, I did not get to read them until I signed in to post this chapter as Fanfiction seems to have stopped sending me notification emails altogether. I am no longer receiving notices for anything which sucks! I emailed them a little while ago, but nothing seems to have been altered. I shall try again and see if I get a response this time.**_

_**Also, exams are coming up, which doesn't help with staying motivated. I will try my hardest.**_

_**Love and best wishes,**_

_**Lee-leerose xx**_


	34. Final Answer

**So Fanfiction still isn't notifying me for anything which is highly annoying. I'm sending them another complaint and hopefully they can sort it out. **

**Chapter 34: Final Answer**

Charlie was back.

I don't know why I had been so nervous upon Seth informing me that Charlie would be well enough to return home. Maybe it had been the thought of what he might bring up from the past, or the possibility of his anger about the situation finally showing as he questioned be about keeping this world a secret. However, I experienced neither of these.

As Sue Clearwater's truck pulled into the driveway my knees were trembling. Jake stood behind me, and I knew that he could hear my breathing accelerate when Charlie stepped out of the passenger side. Leah and Seth jumped gracefully out of the back, landing on the paved driveway with nothing more than a soft thud.

They began walking to the front door. I moved from the window to unlock the catch above the doorknob, but my shaking hands couldn't manage to slip the metal slide from the lock. Jake's warm skin gently encapsulated mine, pulling my hand away slowly before opening the catch himself. I stared up into his face from beneath my dark lashes. He offered a small smile, which strengthened me somewhat.

I stood by silently as Jacob turned the handle and opened the door to our visitors. Charlie stood just off the threshold, a small bag of essentials in his left hand. He half stumbled through the doorway to give me an awkward one-armed hug, and as I wrapped both arms around him, squeezing once before letting go, I felt something click into place between us. It was like an unspoken agreement, and neither of us needed to clarify how we felt about the situation – we weren't very good with expressing our feelings anyway. He knew what I knew – we were on the same page – and there was nothing more to say about vampires or werewolves. We were in the same world now…finally.

…

Later, after Sue and the others had left, Charlie came back downstairs from unpacking his things. I was standing alone at the sink, washing dishes while humming to myself when he finally entered the kitchen.

Since Charlie wasn't clued in on the fact that Jacob had been staying with me over the past few weeks I had decided not to force him into any form of awkward situation, especially not on his first night back. Instead, Jake had acted out his departure (a kiss for me, and a manly clap on the back from Charlie) before making his way back inside, through my bedroom window. At this very moment my boyfriend lay on my bed upstairs; my father none-the-wiser, and I was hoping for it to stay that way.

Charlie made his way over to the table next to the window and sighed as he took a seat on the worn cushion. "Hey, Dad" I said with high spirits, glancing over my shoulder. "I've only got a couple more plates to wash, and then I'll be able to get you a beer from the back fridge."

"You don't need to do that, Bella" he replied "You've already done so much for me."

"I just want to make sure that you're as comfortable as you can be. Sue told me that the doctor ordered for you to rest easy."

"I _am _resting, Bella. I just don't want you to run yourself out. You've been going non-stop since I've arrived home. First you made my bed, then washed my clothes, cooked me dinner, and now you're washing up. And might I add that it looks a tad awkward with the cast on your arm?"

This I couldn't disagree with "I suppose. Actually, now that you mention it, I hadn't realised – due to everything that was going on at the time – but it's time to take off the plaster"

"Wow, that's great news. I have a check-up on Thursday morning. What do you say about keeping your old man company? We can both go in to the hospital together. You'll need me to drive you, anyway."

"That's a good idea. That way I can ask the doctor what you should and shouldn't be doing." I flashed Charlie a cheeky grin as I started on the final dish.

"Hey, missy! I've been very good so far, letting you help me so much. But you really need to take it easy yourself. I want you to have some 'you' time. You deserve it."

I smiled as I pulled the plug and turned away from the sink. "Thanks, dad. But I think I'd rather some 'father-daughter time'. I've missed you."

Charlie shifted awkwardly in his seat before cocking his head slightly to the side. "I've missed you too, Bells. That Clearwater place was different, to say the least."

"…Yeah." I laughed, looking down at the tiled floor and tucking a loose strand of hair back behind my ear. "They sure are an interesting bunch…"

There was a pause, as both of us just waited in pure silence. It was then that I decided to take the plunge. "Listen, Dad. I know this must have been hard for you, and I know how scary it must have been to suddenly be thrown into this completely new world. But I want you to know that the only reason why I kept this from you is because I love you, and I couldn't bear to see you get hurt. Only now I can see how much of a mistake that was. You did get hurt, badly. I am so sorry, for everything. I hope that you can forgive me, and that you can live in this world with me."

I waited for what felt like forever before Charlie finally spoke.

"You shouldn't be sorry. You did nothing wrong, Bella." I looked up from the tiles to stare, disbelievingly at my father.

"But I kept it from you. _Everything_. The _vampires,_ the _werewolves_. I lied to you…" My voice wavered in the silent room.

"Yes, but you did it for a good reason. I'm not sure I would have handled this information too well in the beginning, but now, with my own _experience_…and some very persuasive 'shows' on Leah's part" I smiled "I have come to know this world that you've been living in for the past few years, and I think that, with time, I can live in it too."

"…and Jacob?"

"Jacob has always been like a son to me. This doesn't change that at all. If anything, I now understand him better."

My heart soared.

I was speechless. Charlie had accepted the supernatural world.

Something in me wanted to scream out with happiness and relief, but I resisted. Instead I threw myself across the room at my stunned father, who was still seated at the table. "Thank you, dad. Thank you" I half-cried into his shoulder.

"No, thank _you_ Bella"

Charlie's arm came around my shoulder and patted my back a couple of times before I relinquished my grip from around his neck and, with a peck on his cheek and a wish good night, I tottered on up to bed; a very comforted Bella.

_**Think of this as a belated Christmas gift to you all. It is with the most sincere apologies that I post this chapter. I am really struggling with this story. However, I promise you all that I will try my absolute hardest to complete it. All of your reviews have been so fantastic. I couldn't bear to leave you guys disappointed. Thank you so much to **_siriusly cool48, charlotte davis, Peyton-Marie-James _**and **_missfrisk_** in particular. You guys are amazing. Your ideas are all so different and it really got my mind thinking of the possibilities. A very special mention must also go to **_LadyofSpain_** who has been reviewing every single chapter, from day one. Until she reads this chapter, she won't know just how great she is, but thank you so much. Your reviews made me actually sit down to start this up again, so I'm sure that everyone is extremely grateful **____**  
Okay, that's all from me for now. I'll see if I can whip up something else soonish…or at least earlier than 4 months *touch wood*. I love you all muchly.**_

_**Lee-leerose xx**_


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